The Thief Quotes in The Thief and the Cobbler (1993)

The Thief: What a dump! Nobody lives like this except college kids...

The Thief: Finally, a benefit from my parents being circus people!

The Thief: Rule number one: Keep your eye on the wire and have feet like a monkey. Rule number two: It's always good to wear underwear when you're up this high, otherwise you could attract a sizable crowd. That brings us to rule number three. Rule number three... what's rule number three? I always forget rule number three. Rule number one: eyes and feet, rule number two: underwear.

The Thief: [makes to the top of the minaret] OK, OK. Who's got the camera?

The Thief: Drank my coffee, read the paper, now it's time to get to work.

The Thief: [lifts smallest ball off mineret] You're gonna buy me a castle by the sea.

[lifts second ball off]

The Thief: And you're gonna buy me everything I need to turn the basement into a rec room. And with you,

[lifts third ball off, struggles]

The Thief: I tell ya, sweetheart, I'm going to Disneyland!

The Thief: Everything hurts. Why do I *do* this? What's the point?

[catches sight of the Golden Balls]

The Thief: Oh, *yeah*; pain's gone.

The Thief: They should have a sign: "Beware of Signs".

The Thief: Hey! Two trees on the edge of an impossible-to-climb cliff - perfect!

The Thief: If I find out that's just gold paint...

The Thief: Ooh! What's that? Oh, a naked lady. But wait! A golden backscratcher!

The Thief: [falls into slingshot with one golden ball] No, guys. Come on. I'm not tall enough to ride this ride. Aaaand I suffer from dizzy-spells, honest. Aaaaaand I'm pregnant!

Princess Yum Yum: [urgently] Back to the city, Roofless. Hurry! Hurry!

The Thief: [wearily giving chase] Yeah, "hurry"; *you're* being carried!