The Sheriff Quotes in


The Sheriff Quotes:

  • Jonas: May I inquire just what it is you are looking for?

    The Sheriff: Mass murders and what they stole.

    Jonas: Not the roughies we heard about in Denton? The ones who destroyed the army convoy in Denton.

    The Sheriff: They are somewhere around. We found some of their handywork in Denton's rocky hills. A woman's body... stripped clean.

  • Steve: You wouldn't call a man a white man that had Negro blood in him, would you?

    The Sheriff: No, I wouldn't; not in Mississippi. One drop of Negro blood makes you a Negro in these parts!

  • Pete: [showing Julie's picture to the Sheriff] See that?

    The Sheriff: Why that's Miss Julie LaVerne, ain't it?

    Pete: Yeah, that's what she calls herself, ever since she got married to a white man!

    The Sheriff: What d'ya mean?

    Pete: Frank, come over here; I want you to hear this. You too, Ellie.

    The Sheriff: Sit down and explain yourself. And you make sure you know what you're talkin' about.

  • Parthy: He's a murderer!

    Magnolia: Mama!

    Parthy: You're letting my daughter marry a murderer!

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Who's the murderer?

    Parthy: That Ravenal! He killed a man.

    Magnolia: Gay!

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Then why ain't he in jail, or hanged?

    The Sheriff: The jury figured the gentleman he killed oughta went anyhow.

    Parthy: Andy Hawks, are you going to stand there and let your only child marry a murderer?

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Oh don't be so narrow minded, Mrs. Hawks, I killed a man myself once.

    Parthy: You killed?

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Yes, me. Now, are you comin' with us, or ain't you? They're going to be married.

    Parthy: Married to a murderer! Oh!

    [she faints]

    Ellie May Chipley: She's fainted.

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Are you sure?

    The Sheriff: She's out.

    Cap'n Andy Hawks: Good! Now we'll go on with the wedding.

  • The Sheriff: Now, hold it there, Doc. How can we be sure you ain't possessed? I mean, hell, I just shot you and you're still standing.

    Doc Riley: Ah, well, you ain't got me but on my shoulder.

    The Sheriff: I guess that makes sense. All right, why don't you tell me who won last year's annual cow chip throwing contest.

    Doc Riley: What?

    The Sheriff: You heard me. If it is really you, you'd know.

    Doc Riley: Well, shoot, sheriff, that's kinda a trick question 'cause Lovelock ain't never had an annual cow chip throwing contest. Uh-huh. It alternates every year with the greasy pig catching competition.

    The Sheriff: Ah, he's okay. All right, Doc, get your ass over here.

  • The Sheriff: Well! Ain't you about as handy as a pocket on a shirt.

  • The Sheriff: That damn woman!

    Monk: Yes, I know what you mean.

    The Sheriff: What, you? You're a monk!

    Monk: Well, I'm very well read... and I dream.


    Monk: I dream a lot.

  • The Sheriff: You're a slick, cunning wolf, Zanti, but I finally got ya.

    Pandro Zanti: You forgot, Señor Sheriff, wolves run in packs. And mine is not far behind.

  • The Sheriff: To Zanti after he shackles him to a bed frame: Reckon that'll hold ya.

    John Tobin: I'm not so sure.

    The Sheriff: This is my business. I ain't never lost a prisoner yet.

    Dusty: Heh... You never had one to lose.

  • The Sheriff: I'm warnin' you, Tex. Don't start no trouble in town.

    The Rich Uncle (Jim 'Tex' Preston): I don't want trouble. But I won't run away from it, either!

  • [when Tom Owens mistakes the Mesquiteers for the Cherokee Gang, the Sheriff arrests them]

    Stony Brooke: Why he's crazy. The guys we plugged back on the road are the real Cherokees!

    The Sheriff: I'll settle for the Cherokees we got. Head 'em for jail!

    Lullaby Joslin: Your tombstones are gonna read, "Here lie the Cherokee Boys" and mine will read, "I Told You So!"

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