The Breather Quotes in Student Bodies (1981)
The Breather Quotes:
The Breather: Why do they always run away from me? It's the galoshes. They're a dead giveaway. Why do I wear them? It isn't even raining!
[Over the phone]
Ms. Van Dyke: What makes your voice sound so funny?
The Breather: I'm disguising it.
Ms. Van Dyke: How?
The Breather: By talking through a rubber chicken.
Ms. Van Dyke: I thought it sounded like you were speaking through a rubber chicken.
The Breather: [choosing a horsehead bookend for a murder weapon] Horsehead...
The Breather: [to the audience] Hello, it's me, The Breather. You're probably wonder who I am. Who could I be? Could I be the innocent looking Toby? Would you trust a girl who looked like Prince Valiant in a plum sweater? Maybe I'm Dr. Sigmund; a man who was once arrested for corrupting the morals of a hooker. Then there's Malvert; with an I.Q. of a handball and the personality of a parking meter: violated! Could I be the principal Mr. Peters; a man who keeps cheese in his underwear to attract mice? Let's not forget Ms. Leclair; English teacher by day and English teacher by night. Ah, Miss Mumsley; She eats 12 prunes a day and nothing happens. Nurse Krud and Ms. Van Dyke; what's in a name? Everything! And then there's Dumpkin; a man who sleeps with his nuts in between horsehead bookends.
The Breather: Nurse Krud and Ms. Van Dyke. What's in a name? Everything.
The Breather: [after repeatedly stepping in gum] I'd like to kill the kid with the gum!
The Breather: [on the phone] I'm gonna kill next at the football game. Click.
Ms. Van Dyke: Did you hang up?
The Breather: No, I just said "click".
[then hangs up]
The Breather: I said... huhahuhahuhahuhahuha...!
Browse more character quotes from Student Bodies (1981)