Tessa Quotes in Imagine Me & You (2005)

H: Heck, I've got a question.

Tessa: Not now.

Heck: What's the question, H?

H: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

Heck: [thinks for a few seconds, then replies] I haven't got a bastard clue, I'm afraid.

Tessa: There you are, you see. Now we can let him get married in peace.

[She starts to lead H to the church to find a seat for the wedding]

Luce: [Catches H before Tessa can take her away completely] It never happens. If there's a thing that can't be stopped, it's not possible for there to be something else which can't be moved, and vice versa. They can't both exist. You see, it's a trick question is the answer.

H: [as Tessa leads her to the church] Can she sit with me?

Ned: So, who's the lucky chap? What's his name?

Rachel: Her name... is Luce.

Tessa: Luce? As in a woman? As are you a woman? So you mean you two are lesbifriends?

Rachel: It doesn't matter what you call it, it's not going to happen.

Tessa: This man's as useless as a fart in a jam jar.

Tessa: Cooper, that trollop. That man would shag an open wound.

Tessa: Will you fuck off with the fucking candles?

Kelly Foster: [when Tessa asked what she did during the summer in London] OH! JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING, THE CLUBS ARE GREAT IN LONDON, AND NO SHORTAGE OF DRINKS IF YOU LPAY IT RIGHT.

Tessa: OH MY GOD! YOU'RE PROPER SLAPPER KEL...

Tessa: To live the life without any plan is currently my plan.