Terry Collier Quotes in The Likely Lads (1976)

Terry Collier: I'd offer you a beer, but I've only got six cans.

Bob: In the chocolate box of life the top layer's already gone. And someone's pinched the orange creme from the bottom.

Terry Collier: Bloody hell.

Terry Collier: Back in time for a drink, watch the box this afternoon - that's what a weekend should be - sport, sleep, slippers and sex.

Bob: Not necessarily in that order.

Terry Collier: Oh Chris, I can't stand saying goodbye like this.

Christina: You really mean that?

Terry Collier: Yeah - you finish packing, I'm going to the pub.

Bob: Did Thelma call?

Terry Collier: No.

Bob: Are you sure?

Terry Collier: We don't have a phone.

Terry Collier: That's just one of life's bitter ironies Bob.

Bob: I suffer a lot from those.

Bob: When it comes to women you're hardly Omar Sharif.

Terry Collier: If Omar Sharif lived in Gateshead I doubt he'd be Omar Sharif.

Bob: I bet we could go right round the world and you'd have a pat response ready.

Terry Collier: I've travelled man, I've seen a bit of the world now you know.

Bob: What do you think of Koreans, for instance?

Terry Collier: Not to be trusted. Cruel people. Much the same as all Orientals.

Bob: That's a third of the world's population dismissed in a phrase. Russians?

Terry Collier: Sinister.

Bob: Egyptians?

Terry Collier: Cowardly.

Bob: Oh? I thought you might have saved that for Italians.

Terry Collier: No, no, they're greasy aren't they? Not as greasy as the French mind.

Bob: Germans?

Terry Collier: Arrogant.

Bob: Spaniards?

Terry Collier: Lazy.

Bob: Danes?

Terry Collier: Pornographic.

Bob: Well that's just about everyone. Oh, Americans?

Terry Collier: Well, they're flash aren't they?

Bob: So it's just down to the British, is it?

Terry Collier: Well, I haven't got much time for the Irish or the Welsh, and the Scots are worse than the Koreans.

Bob: And you never could stand Southerners.

Terry Collier: To tell you the truth I don't like anybody much outside this town. And there's a lot of families in our street I can't stand either. Come to think of it, I don't even like the people next door.

Bob: I see, so from the distant blue Pacific through the barren wastes of Manchuria, to 127 Inkerman Terrace, you can't abide anyone.

Bob: These streets are ugly, but they have a kind of beauty.

Terry Collier: Working class sentiment is the indulgence of working peopled created through football and rock-and-roll or people like you who moved out to the elm lodge housing estate at the earliest opportunity.

Bob: Well I didn't want my kids growing up in these streets.

Bob: Nobody cares, nobody's moved by the occasion.

Terry Collier: Residents are, moved to a highrise.

Bob: Of course you always had an irresistible sexual magnetism.

Terry Collier: True but its not just that.

Bob: What is it then, I'm dying to know!

Terry Collier: Well once I've got them up here, there's no way they're going to risk leavin this dodgy area after dark.

Terry Collier: You kicked it up there!

Bob: Not on purpose, was only making a strong clearance.

Fireman: We've got better things to do with taxpayers money.

Bob: I'm sorry, when I get to the top I just lost me nerve.

Terry Collier: Keeps your hand in doesn't it, better than polishing your bell up all afternoon.

Bob: Mind you my wife isn't really with me.

Terry Collier: In town though.

Bob: Out of sight, out of mind.

Terry Collier: Good thinking Bob.

Terry Collier: [to young couple kissing passionately in lift] It's young Marsha isn't it, shouldn't you be in bed?

Marsha: We'd rather be but dad's in, that's why we're in the lift.