Sylvia Quotes in Harsh Times (2005)

Sylvia: You're crazy and you're dangerous and my biggest nightmare is you with a fucking badge!

Sylvia: You have to keep trying until something happens. Finding a job is a job, right?

Sylvia: You look like a gift-wrapped turd!

Sylvia: Jim, good luck on your pee test. I hope you studied.

Jim Davis: I'm gonna cram for it!

[Sylvia stabs Jean-Francois's dead body]

Capitaine Duhamel: He was dead.

Sylvia: Now it's certain.

Sylvia: Do you know how Florentine women ensure their husbands come home? Every morning they slip him a slow poison, and every evening the antidote. That way, when the husband spends the night away, he has a very bad night.

Gregoire De Fronsac: You needn't resort to that.

Pastor Dr. Matthew Collins: I think we should try to make them understand we mean them no harm. They are living creatures out there.

Sylvia: But they're not human. Dr. Forrester says they're some kind of advanced civilization.

Pastor Dr. Matthew Collins: If they're more advanced than us, they should be nearer the creator for that reason. No real attempt has been made to communicate with them, you know?

Sylvia: Let's go back inside, Uncle Matthew.

Pastor Dr. Matthew Collins: I've done all I can in there. You go back. Sylvia, I like that Dr. Forrester, he's a good man.

Soldier: Who's that? What's he think he's doing?

Sylvia: Uncle! Uncle Matthew!

Major General Mann: It's too late now. He's too far away.

Pastor Dr. Matthew Collins: Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.

Forrester: It's seen him!

Pastor Dr. Matthew Collins: Thou anointest my head with oil. My cup runneth over. And I will dwell in the house of the Lord, forever.

[Martians kill Uncle Matthew]

Sylvia: [scream]

Col. Ralph Heffner: Let'm have it!

Soldier: Fire!

Sylvia: They seem to murder everything that moves.

Sylvia: [at site of first meteor landing] Did you see it come down?

Forrester: Yes, I was fishing up in the hills.

Sylvia: Well, you must have caught plenty with all that tackle!

Sonny: You! Manager! Fucker! Don't get any ideas, you hear?

Sheldon: Believe me, I'm on your side on this one!

Sonny: Yeah, my side, shit!

Sylvia: Look, there are young ladies, here. You could watch your language, you know!

Sonny: I speak what I feel. "Watch my language". Empty the drawer out!

Sylvia: Why don't you smoke?

Sal: I don't want the cancer.

Sylvia: Anybody got a cigarette?

Maria: Yeah, I do - Sylvia, you don't smoke!

Sal: You don't smoke?

Sylvia: No.

Sal: Why do you wanna start now?

Sylvia: I'm scared to death, that's why. What, you don't smoke?

Sal: No.

Sylvia: How come?

Sal: I don't want the cancer.

Sylvia: Oh, my God.

[to Maria]

Sylvia: Give me the cigarette.

Sal: Go ahead, do what you want. I just think you ought to take care of your body, that's all.

Sylvia: My body? What for?

Sal: The body is the temple of the Lord.

Sylvia: You're serious. So you rob a bank but you keep your body pure. Is that it?

Sal: You gonna smoke the cigarette or what?

Sylvia: Yes. If I die of cancer, it'll be half your fault.

Sal: No, it's because you're weak.

Sylvia: [sarcastically] Right. I'm weak.

David: Would you marry me?

Gillian: Well, it wouldn't be very practical, David.

David: Practical? No, of course not. Of course not. But then neither am I, Gillian. Neither am I. I'm not very practical at all.

Sylvia: You'll miss the plane!

Gillian: It's sweet of you, David. I don't know what to say.

David: The stars, Gillian darling! Ask the stars!

[Gillian has come to visit Sylvia. When they arrive home, the house is in a mess and loud music is playing]

Gillian: Is that the water running?

[Sylvia runs to the bathroom to find the shower running and the basin overflowing]

Sylvia: David? Where in God's heaven is he?

Sylvia: Sometimes I feel like I'm not... solid. I'm hollow. There's nothing behind my eyes. I'm a negative of a person. It's as if I never - -I never thought anything. I never wrote anything. I never felt anything.

Sylvia: [to Ted, after making love] We're not even two people. Even before we met, we were just these two halves, walking around with big gaping holes in the shape like the other person. And when we found each other we were finally whole. And then it was as if we couldn't stand being happy so we ripped ourselves in half again.

[first lines]

Sylvia: Sometimes I dream the tree, and the tree is my life. One branch is the man I shall marry, and the leaves my children. Another branch is my future as a writer, and each leaf is a poem. Another branch is a good academic career. But as I sit there trying to choose, the leaves bring to turn brown and blow away, until the tree is absolutely bare.

Ted: A fucking good poem is a weapon. It's... and not like a "pop", it's a bomb. A bloody big bomb!

Sylvia: That's why they make children learn them in school. They don't want them messing about with them on their own. I mean, just imagine if a sonnet went off accidentally. Boom.

Ted: I'm sorry...

Sylvia: What for?

Ted: I don't know yet...

Sylvia: Daddy, daddy, you bastard, I'm through.

[from her poetry]

[on the phone to the BBC]

Sylvia: Don't take such tone of voice with me!

Sylvia: You probably just think I'm some ghastly American bitch, don't you?

Professor Thomas: God no, I thought you were Canadian.

Professor Thomas: The government cut the electricity.

Sylvia: Why?

Professor Thomas: To build national character!

Sylvia: I am thinking of taking a lover.

Al Alvarez: Who?

Sylvia: [Sylvia stares at Al, half-smiling]

[about the cows on the river bank]

Sylvia: How do you think they prefer Milton or Chaucer?

Ted: Chaucer obviously!

Sylvia: You know, just because I didn't like that ridiculous comedy you did with Goldie Hawn did not mean I did not love you. That's what you always do. You confuse love for admiration.

Riggan: Why did we break up?

Sylvia: Because you threw a kitchen knife at me. And an hour later you were telling me how much you loved me.

Mike Michaelson: The Hague for Christof. Hello? The Hague? All right, we've lost that call, let's go to Hollywood, California. You're on Trutalk.

Sylvia: Hi, Christof, I'd just like to say one thing, you're a liar and a manipulator and what you've done to Truman is sick!

Christof: Well. We remember this voice, don't we? How could we forget?

Mike Michaelson: Uh, let's go to another call, what do we have...

Christof: No. No, no, no, no, no, it's fine, it's fine, Mike. I love to reminisce with former members of the cast. Sylvia, as you announced so melodramatically to the world, do you think because you batted your eyes at Truman once, flirted with him, stole a few minutes of airtime with him to thrust yourself and your politics into the limelight, that you know him? That you know what's right for him? You really think you're in a position to judge him?

Sylvia: What right do you have to take a baby and turn his life into some kind of mockery? Don't you ever feel guilty?

Christof: I have given Truman the chance to lead a normal life. The world, the place you live in, is the sick place. Seahaven is the way the world should be.

Sylvia: He's not a performer, he's a prisoner. Look at him, look at what you've done to him!

Christof: He could leave at any time. If his was more than just a vague ambition, if he was absolutely determined to discover the truth, there's no way we could prevent him. I think what distresses you, really, caller, is that ultimately Truman prefers his cell, as you call it.

Sylvia: Well, that's where you're wrong. You're so wrong! And he'll prove you wrong!

Sylvia: You mean you bring other girls up here?

Kirkeby: Certainly not! I'm a happily married man.

Shawn Colfax: I know you want to be here, because you finish last every single year, but you still keep coming back! Even if it means taking endless shit from total dong-knockers like the Panthers!

Sylvia: I wanna cut the blonde one!

Nick Brady: What?

Sylvia: What?

Nick Brady: What?

Sylvia: ...I'm just saying.

[repeated line]

Sylvia: [whenever she says or does something that draws attention to herself] ... I'm just saying.

Sylvia: [while getting it on in the backseat of a car, hears motorcycle coming] Aw, shit!

Bobby Chrystal: What?

Sylvia: It's my boyfriend.

Bobby Chrystal: Your boyfriend?

Sylvia: Ha-ha-ha. Well... actually... we're engaged to be married. He HATES when I do this, ha-ha-ha. Last guy he caught, he dragged behind his bike... in chains. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, don't worry. It was only over dirt!

Mary: What a crock.

Sylvia: Mary! Where did you hear that?

Peter Mitchell: [On the phone] What a crock!

Sylvia: You are a selfish bastard!

Peter Mitchell: I'm selfish? At least I didn't leave my baby on a doorstep when she was six months old!

[Sylvia slaps Peter]

Sylvia: Edward is a wonderful person, but something keeps me from saying yes.

Vera Bennington: Would that something happen to be a tall architecht?

Sylvia: I think we need drinks.

Peter Mitchell: I think we need shovels.

Edward Hargreave: [recovered from the punch Peter gave him] Forgive me for bringing up a sticky point, but we are married.

Sylvia: Oh, God, he's right.

Jack Holden: [as the vicar running down the aisle] I beg to differ with you young man. But the ceremony is not officially over.

Edward Hargreave: Shut up, you old fool!

Jack Holden: Oh! He called me an old fool! I can hardly believe my ears!

[he pulls at his ears and pulls them off]

Peter Mitchell: Where are you gonna live?

Sylvia: London.

Jack Holden: London, England?

Michael Kellam: [Sarcastically] No, London, New Jersey.

Sylvia: [brings in breakfast] Here's my specialty. Liver moose and poached eggs.

Edward Hargreave: [looks at the tray and stammers] What an attractive combination, but we do have a cook for these sort of things.

Sylvia: I like doing it.

Mary: Try it Edward. You'll like it.

Edward Hargreave: [sees Mary holding her tea cup in the palm of her hand] Whoever taught you to hold you teacup like that?

Sylvia: Someone going to come to the airport to help me pick up my mother?

Peter Mitchell: Jack can you do it?

Jack Holden: Oh damn, I got that kidney operation this afternoon! What about you, Peter?

Peter Mitchell: Michael, I'll give you $1,000 if you'll do it!

Peter Mitchell: Marry me.

Sylvia: Why Peter? For Mary's sake? You don't have to do that now. I'm moving back to New York and living there and you can see as much of Mary as you like.

Peter Mitchell: It's not for Mary I'm doing this. I'm doing it for me. I love you.

Sylvia: No you don't.

Peter Mitchell: Yes I do. I love you. I love the way you walk, I love the way you laugh, I love the way when you get nervous you bite your bottom lip just like you're doing now, I love the way you love Mary,

[to the congregation]

Peter Mitchell: I even love her liver mousse. I love you and if there were no Mary, if there was nothing else I would still love you. And I want to make Mary all over again with you.

Sylvia: I know some of the children at this school and I know their parents. Family life is not easy. But of all the fathers, the step fathers, the half fathers that I've know, not one of them could love and support a child like these three men love Mary. There's nothing they wouldn't do for her. I just hope that there are other children who are as lucky as Mary is.

Sylvia: I'd like a man who sweeps a girl off her feet.

Jack Holden: Kinda like I swept you off your feet.

Sylvia: Knocked me off my feet is more like it.

Sylvia: If you think about it, if Mary and I hadn't moved in a taken up a part of your live, you'd all be in very different situations right now.

Michael Kellam: We'd be married.

Peter Mitchell: We'd be divorced! You've saved us a fortune.

Edward Hargreave: [to Sylvia, who's looking out a window] What's the matter, darling?

Sylvia: I'm concerned about Mary.

Edward Hargreave: Oh, she'll come around. You'll see.

Sylvia: And I'm nervous about tomorrow.

Edward Hargreave: Don't you want to get married?

Sylvia: Yes, of course I do. I think so. I mean... yes, yes I do. But why do you ask?

Edward Hargreave: Everything's going to be fine. I promise you...

Peter Mitchell: [Peter and Michael come rushing in] You sonofabitch! You're planning on sending Mary to that boarding school!

Edward Hargreave: What are you talking about!

Michael Kellam: We went to Pileforth this afternoon.

Peter Mitchell: He's planning to send Mary there!

Sylvia: In five or six years, that's a possibility, yes...

Peter Mitchell: No, not in five or six years. Next term.

Edward Hargreave: That's not true.

Peter Mitchell: He's lying to you.

Edward Hargreave: Rubbish.

Michael Kellam: Then why was Miss Lomax measuring Mary?

Sylvia: Was she?

Michael Kellam: For a uniform.

Edward Hargreave: A gift. She asked me if she could give Mary a blazer.

Peter Mitchell: Why?

Edward Hargreave: Because she said that with all the presents Sylvia and I were going to get, Mary might feel left out.

Sylvia: I think that's a very sweet thought.

Edward Hargreave: Yes, I thought so.

Peter Mitchell: What a crock!

Jack Holden: Do you want to marry me?

Peter Mitchell: Jack!

Jack Holden: [to Sylvia] Wanna sleep on it?

Michael Kellam: She did that once before, Jack!

Jack Holden: Hey, shut up!

[turns back to Sylvia]

Jack Holden: Do you want to marry me?

Sylvia: No... but thank you for asking.

Theatre Manager: Sylvia. Where ya going, honey?

Sylvia: Look, I'm sorry, Harry. Intermission's in twenty minutes. And I gotta go warm up the ah, wienies.

Sylvia: This home that you think is home is really just the first one... it's like, we have this family, and we go off and we do stuff and eventually we start ourselves a new family, and then, our family will go off and start more families. And really it's just this whole chain reaction of like, creation, and then we try to classify it in stages so that we can find comfort in where we're at in that one particular moment in time but really theres no such thing as time and really we're all just walking talking patterns.

Vickie Pearle: I love your lipstick, what's it called?

Sylvia: Pink Passion!

[they laugh awkwardly]

Vickie Pearle: Well quit passion it around!

Sylvia: Jesus Christ! I swear! If you try and kill me I am going to be so upset with myself... And you! I mean, you have that wonderful English accent. I mean, you eat crumpets for breakfast and drink tea at four o'clock. You couldn't hurt me if you wanted to could you?

Stanley Farmer: I couldn't have put it better myself.

Sylvia: I thought it might be enchanting to have the bridesmaids in little jodhpurs and carrying riding crops festumed with baby's breath.

Lillian Brooks: That could be enchanting. In a stable.

Walter Paisley: [Entering The Yellow Door, dressed in a rather absurd-looking artist's costume] Sylvia, didn't you see me wave my zen stick?

Sylvia: [Surprised, not recognizing him at first] Why, it's Walter Paisley!

Walter Paisley: Bring me a cappuccino, and a piece of papaya cheesecake... and, uh, and a bottle of Yugoslavian white wine.

Sylvia: Yes sir, Mr. Paisley!

Cavendish: John, I hope you're keeping Miss Hunter invisible.

Sylvia: Invisible?

Cavendish: Well, you'd be more comfortable. You see, this isn't Europe. We haven't many celebrities and the richest girl in the world finds she won't have much of a private life.

Tony: Well, where was Moses when the lights went out?

Sylvia: In the dark.

[last lines]

Sylvia: C'mon, baby. The handcuffs are gettin' cold...

Sylvia: Did you bring Big Willy?

Keith Frazier: Yeah and the Twins!

Laura: Late night?

Sylvia: I guess.

Laura: Again?

Sylvia: Again.

Laura: Hmm. Same guy?

Sylvia: No.

Laura: Do I know him?

Sylvia: Maybe.

Laura: Do you know him?

Sylvia: What grade are you in?

Maria: 9th.

Sylvia: Do you have a boyfriend?

Maria: Nope. Do you?

Sylvia: Sounds like a great setup. I can't believe how fast it all happened.

Eleanor: That's what kinda scares me about the whole thing. I talked to the mother for about 10 minutes before she hires me to take care of their 12 year old son. Next thing I know I'm living there.

Sylvia: You totally lucked out. I mean, what's the big deal?

Eleanor: They're like gazillionaires. The house is the size of Grand Central. And what do I know about taking care of a 12 year old boy?

Sylvia: Free room and board, plus you get paid, what more could you want? And besides, you lived with Dennis for a year, you should be fine with a 12 year old.

Sylvia: You know what we need?

John: Yup, I got one right here!

[holds up a condom]

Sylvia: Uh, no. I meant a couple of beers, John.

Gretchen: [Newby is hanging a notice up on the door to the union hall] Eh, what's going on?

Chief Jake Newby: The mayor's cancelled the dance, and that's all there is to it... well, in the light of Mabel's death, we had no choice.

Sylvia: Mabel would've wanted us to have the dance, I mean she worked so hard on it!

John: Yeah, you can't cancel it now!

Tommy Whitcomb: You're just looking for an excuse to cancel the dance.

Chief Jake Newby: That's the way it is! There'll be no dance tomorrow night, and no parties either, you understand me?

Sylvia: He's not drunk, stupid. He's been doped!

Pete: Huh?

Sylvia: With that stuff that they call LSD. The whole bunch take it.

Pete: What does it do, that L-whatever you call it?

Sylvia: Boy, you really don't know anything. Well, it makes a person crazy.

Pete: Wow! Is that what *they've* done to Grampaw?

Sylvia: Population 40?

Horace Bones: Soon are gonna be 48.

Sylvia: Mmm... you're pretty yummy for a dirty old man!

[grandfather moans in disgust]

Sylvia: Have a breath freshener, handsome!

Sylvia: [drops strange pill into his mouth]

Sylvia: It'll make you stay sweet for HOURS!

Sylvia: Hmm, you probably work in the city, hm? You got that... cold air, no offense.

Blake: Depends which city you'd be referring to.

Sylvia: What difference does it make? They're all so goddamn far.

Sylvia: What are you waiting for?

Blake: What? Oh... a train.

Sylvia: [sarcastic] That's different.

Blake: What are you waiting for?

Sylvia: A little love. Aren't we all?

Sylvia: Wow, what is this? Yesterday all over again?

Blake: I guess.

Sylvia: What happened? Train didn't show up?

Blake: Guess not. Yours?

Sylvia: No... Not yet.

Blake: Any idea when it'll get here?

Sylvia: Well, one of these days for sure.

Blake: You know, this town could teach the whole world about this war. We got the heroes, the wives, the guys always comin' and going'. Most people only hear about it. Do you ever wonder what makes it so personal to us?

Sylvia: We care about 'em, we love 'em.

Blake: So does everybody else. It's not that. It's death. Yeah... Death has this way of making things personal. It justifies a lot of things.

Sylvia: I know you. You always order stuff from these writers with really hard names. I never know how to say 'em.

Simon: Have you ever tried reading them?

Sylvia: Can't say I have. What're they about?

Simon: Same old stuff: friendship, war, honor, courage, love.

Sylvia: So if you know 'em why do you keep readin' 'em?

Simon: 'Cause I hope I'll finally learn how to deal with all that stuff.

Sylvia: What's keepin' us here? Why can't we start anew?

John: Because. Because, Sylvia. It's illegal, I could go to jail. Because... this is who we are.

Sylvia: What? We can't be happy? What about our life, our baby, the plans?

John: They're gonna have to wait!

Blake: It's human nature, an eye for an eye. Because the thing is... nobody's a murderer until something horrible happens and he's gotta straighten that out, fix it.

Sylvia: John's everything I got! See, people think life's about gettin' it all, but it's not, it's about gettin' what you want the most. For me, that's John.

Sylvia: You always wanted to be like him and now... You remind me of him so much.

Mike: How come?

Sylvia: You've lost that glitter in your eyes.

Sylvia: Boys are like dough. There is a certain way of touching them that will make them rise.

Sylvia: ls it possible to go on living, being the victim of vicious love?

Johann: I'm sorry, but duty is more important than shrimps.

Sylvia: Oh.

[laughs]

Sylvia: Well, the duty is yours, the house is mine. And in my house, shrimps are more important than duty.

Sylvia: That's really quite a world that you've shown me. German scientists are as tall as the Empire State Building, and aliens are as big as jumbo shrimp.

Sylvia: Are those Zeiss?

Lenny: The one and only. Perfect 20/20 vision, low-light and thermoptic modes, integrated targeting system, GPS and satellite uplink.

Sylvia: Wow. You can kill people and check your email all at the same time. That's really something.

Sylvia: This isn't aspirin. It's Chronotin. Father Time. The anti-aging drug? I looked last night.

Lenny: So what do you want? Your junior detective badge?

Sylvia: Oh, Jack! Yoo-hoo! Hello, darling. Where have you been?

Jack Ingleside: Yes, where have I been?

Sylvia: You naughty boy.

Jack Ingleside: Have a drink.

Sylvia: Right. Not too much now, I might forget myself.

Jack Ingleside: Cheer-o!

Sylvia: Cheer-o!

Jack Ingleside: You're going to stay very close to me tonight, little devil.

Frank Bryant: Swenson, you bastard! Meet the man who just hit the jackpot. Me, the $50,000 jackpot!

Capt. Carbajal: You are lucky these men don't speak English.

Frank Bryant: I suppose you're getting your cut, too?

Sylvia: Frank!

Capt. Carbajal: Mr. Bryant, if these men knew about the reward, they might decide a severed head gives less trouble than a live captain. Mount your horses please. Vamanos.

Joshua Peters: Excuse me, does this belong to you?

Sylvia: Now what's he gone and done?

Joshua Peters: Well, he was creating a fairly sophisticated surveillance system behind the ladies' cabana.