Steve Tobias Quotes in The In-Laws (2003)
Steve Tobias Quotes:
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Steve Tobias: This wedding is going to be as normal as butter on mashed potatoes.
-- Steve Tobias -
Steve Tobias: I don't know one person here.
Jerry Peyser: That's because it's not an arms market.
-- Steve Tobias -
Jerry Peyser: I'm sorry I called you the worst father in the world. I'm sure there's at least two or three guys who are worse.
Steve Tobias: Thank you, Jer.
-- Steve Tobias -
Steve Tobias: Doctor, do you know what a roofie is?
Jerry Peyser: Yeah I know what a roofie is, frat boys give them to girls at parties.
[Steve nods]
Jerry Peyser: Oh no. Oh don't rape me.
[passes out]
-- Steve Tobias -
Angela Harris: Is that a fanny pack?
Steve Tobias: It's cute, isn't it?
Angela Harris: It's adorable.
-- Steve Tobias -
Steve Tobias: We're the CIA.
Angela Harris: Great, now I have to kill him.
-- Steve Tobias -
Jerry Peyser: Six people on a beach! I could have saved a fortune.
Steve Tobias: Jer, they're gonna be fine. In fact, the whole family's gonna be just fine.
-- Steve Tobias -
Steve Tobias: [after large snake is served at ethnic restaurant] Uh, Jerry, you alright? You haven't even touched your food!
Jerry Peyser: My food is still eating.
-- Steve Tobias -
[last lines]
[as Jean-Pierre is being taken away by the police, he waves at Jerry]
Jean-Pierre Thibodoux: Call me!
Jerry Peyser: You know something? He might actually like prison.
Steve Tobias: Like it? He's gonna LOVE it!
-- Steve Tobias -
Jerry Peyser: That was fun.
Steve Tobias: Yeah blackmail! Ha ha.
-- Steve Tobias -
Steve Tobias: So have you ever been to Vietnam?
Katherine Peyser: No, but we hear it's lovely.
-- Steve Tobias
Browse more character quotes from The In-Laws (2003)