Spool Quotes in How I Won the War (1967)

Juniper: [re-enters scene still dressed as a clown, Drogue, Spool, Gripweed, and Clapper in tow] Bayonet!

Transom: Bayonet?

Spool: Where's your bayonet?

Juniper: Must have left it sticking in the enemy, sir!

Spool: Spur!

Juniper: Where?

Transom: Where's your spur?

Juniper: Must have left it sticking in the horse, sir!

Goodbody: [calls out] Two men!

[exeunt players]

Goodbody: [walks back to Transom and ex-Dooley, points his finger at ex-Dooley, shouting] There! On the end of my finger!

Gripweed: [re-enter players] Finger!

Juniper: Finger?

Gripweed: Musketeer Juniper, where's your finger?

Juniper: Must have left it sticking up the Khyber Pass, sir!

Transom: Self-inflicted injury! March him off, Musket Major! Two - wait for it!

[pause, players posed as if frozen while running]

Transom: Two men!

[exeunt players]