SpongeBob SquarePants Quotes in The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015)


SpongeBob SquarePants Quotes:

  • [from trailer]

    [SpongeBob is playing two keyboards of a tiny piano over and over again]

    Plankton: Will you stop playing that tiny piano?

    [SpongeBob stops playing and hides the tiny piano behind his back ]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Sorry.

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Alright, here comes the pain!

    Burger-Beard: Hah!

    [He opens a hatch and many cannons came out of the front hatch]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Ah!

    Plankton: That ain't good.

    [He fires a cannon ball at SpongeBob, but it goes in a bubble. He fires more cannon balls, then SpongeBob as the Invincibubble gets them in many bubbles]

    Patrick Star: They're beautiful.

    [He pops a bubble, then a cannon ball lands on his face]

  • [Patrick is hitting his rock home with the word "grandma" on the bottom with a hammer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, what are you doing?

    Patrick Star: Vandalizing stuff.

    Plankton: Isn't that your house?

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Mr. Superawesomeness, take him down.

    [Patrick uses his mind to control ice cream at him, he holds two ice creams as thunder crashes, but Patrick starts eating them]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Maybe, we should've picked a better superpower for you, Patrick.

  • [from trailer]

    Patrick Star: SpongeBob!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick?

    Patrick Star: Talk to me, buddy.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm seeing a bright light.

    Patrick Star: [blocks the sun] Is this better?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Much. Thank you.

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Cotton candy.

    Sandy Cheeks: If you ate all of that, you'll have enough energy to run around the whole world.

    [SpongeBob and Patrick ate the cotton candy, starts going hyper, and starts laughing as they run all over the world, but Sandy throws a travel card away as SpongeBob and Patrick are still laughing]

    Squidward Tentacles: Ahh! When is the sugar gonna wear off?

    [SpongeBob and Patrick fell down front]

  • [in sneak peek]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Give me that!

    Plankton: Come on, SpongeBob, join me and we'll be rich and powerful until I eventually betray you!

    [They're struggling for the Secret Formula]

    Plankton: Join me!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: No! Never! I'm on Team Krabs for life!

    Mr. Krabs: [He muster the metal shutters open to get in] PLANKTON!

    [SpongeBob and Plankton continue to struggle for the Krabby Patty Secret Forumla until it magically disappeared]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: What? Where'd it go?

    Plankton: [in thoughts] Wait a minute, molecular deconstruction? I proved that to be a scientific impossibility seven times!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [in thoughts] Wait a minute, I think I forgot to empty Gary's litter box today.

  • [from TV spot]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: If you're from the future, what am I going to say next?

    Plankton: Something moronic?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Wow.

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: A giant hairy porpoise's beached!

    Mr. Krabs: We need to get these guys back in the water.

    [the gang tries to roll a human in the ocean, but it landed on them in the sand]

    Squidward Tentacles: Ew, this place smells awful!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: We'll take one secret formula to go. Clear the area, citizens! There's gonna be some serious aft-kicking here!

  • [from preview]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: We'll take one secret formula to go! Clear the area, citizens. There's gonna be some serious aft kicking here.

    [a boy takes a picture of SpongeBob and his friends on his phone]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Sour Note!

    [Squidward magically unleashes a clarinet and starts playing a really louder note which made the customers covering their ears and leave]

    Burger-Beard: No, wait, wait! Customers! No wait, please!

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: There's the book! Now, it's our turn to rewrite the story.

  • [from sneak peek]

    Squidward Tentacles: Mr. Krabs, the customers are getting restless.

    [the customers are yelling "refunds!"]

    Mr. Krabs: Listen up, boy get in there and make me customers some krabby patties.

    [SpongeBob screams like a girl when he finds out there are no krabby patties there]

    Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! What's wrong, boy?

    [He opens the freezer door a little, and he screamed like a girl as well]

    Mr. Krabs: We're out of krabby patties?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: How can we make more krabby patties without the secret formula?

    Mr. Krabs: You've got to have that formuler memorized by now.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: But as you are aware, sir, the Employee Handbook clearly states, and I quote, "No employee may in part, or in whole, commit the Krabby Patty secret formula to any recorded, written, or visual form, including memories, dreams, and/or needlepoint".

    Mr. Krabs: [He sobbed] Oh, curse you, fine print!

  • [from TV spot]

    Patrick Star: What's the secret password?

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPlankton: Uuuhhhh...

    Patrick Star: Correct!

  • [from trailer]

    [Patrick looks at a girl holding an ice cream cone with three scoops]

    Patrick Star: Where have you been all my life?

    [He starts eating the girl's three scoops of ice cream]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: This is uncomfortable.

  • [from sneak peek]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [They arrived in the human world] Woah! What is this place?

    Mr. Krabs: I have a bad feeling about this.

    Patrick Star: [they see a foot] Maybe, this guys knows where we are. He looks smart. He's got five heads.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [to the foot] Um, sir, can you tell us where to find the krabby patty?

    Patrick Star: Hey! My friend is talking to you.

    [He taps the foot several times]

  • [from sneak peek]

    Mr. Krabs: Where's me formula, Plankton?

    Plankton: I... I don't know. It just disappeared

    Mr. Krabs: Why should I believe you, you lying liar?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Normally, I'd agree with you, Mr. Krabs, but this time, he's telling the truth! It just vanished!

    Plankton: It's true!

  • [from TV spot]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Let's go, team!

    [a pelican squawks at Patrick as he is pushed down, hanging to an edge of a rock cliff]

    Patrick Star: I want a new team! This one's broken!

  • [from trailer]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Krabby Patties!

    Mr. Krabs: What are you doing with me formula?

    Burger-Beard: You mean...

    [he sets up his restaurant]

    Burger-Beard: *me* formula!

  • [from TV spot]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Maybe, you should get that checked out.

    Patrick Star: [His eyes are holed by the cannonball] Why?

  • [from TV spot]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Look out!

    [a boy on his skateboard hits a pole and falls down]

    Sandy Cheeks: Aw, nuts!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I'll rock him while you read him a bedtime story.

    Plankton: Uh once upon a time there was a big pink fat idiot who went to sleep. The End!

    Patrick Star: Nice try.

  • [from TV spot]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: We're putting a team together.

    Patrick Star: Ooh, pick me!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: To the surface!

  • [from trailer]

    Burger-Beard: Attack!

    [a Plankton helicopter appeared to attack the Krusty Krab, and SpongeBob is ready to aim at it]

    Patrick Star: I think we have a few minutes before he gets here.

    [SpongeBob flips the binoculars over]

    Patrick Star: Aaahhh! He's right on top of us!

    [the Plankton helicopter drops a jar of mayonnaise]

    Mr. Krabs: Bar the door!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [He puts a chair under the doorknob] Got it!

    [the door blows up as the Bikini Bottom citizens gasp, and the Secret Formula has been stolen by Burger-Beard]

    Burger-Beard: Bullseye!

  • Plankton: [nervous]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Mr. Krabs, I'm telling you, he's innocent.

    Plankton: What are you going to do Krabs? Pour hot oil on me, or put bamboo shoots under my nails?

    Mr. Krabs: No, knock knock.

    Plankton: Knock knock jokes? I could do this all day Krabs.

    Mr. Krabs: Knock knock.

    Plankton: Oh boy, who's there?

    Mr. Krabs: Jimmy.

    Plankton: Jimmy who?


    Plankton: Well, that's stupid but how is that torture?

    Mr. Krabs: Hee hee hee. You'll see.

    [Mr. Krabs puts on headphones]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Jimmy, back my formula, hmm. Ooooooooh, I get it!

    [SpongeBob starts laughing]

    Plankton: [while he hears SpongeBob laughing, he screams]

    Mr. Krabs: [still has headphones on and ignores everything]

    Plankton: [SpongeBob continues to laugh and Plankton is screaming] Oh make it stop Krabs, make it stop!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, hand me the potatoes.

    Patrick Star: Mashed or scalloped?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Better make them... raw!

    Patrick Star: Aye, aye, sir!

    [Gives sack of potatoes to SpongeBob, who loads them in a cannon]

  • Patrick Star: Justice is best soft served.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, I should've never doubted about your super powers.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Sandy? Is that you?

    Sandy Cheeks: You can call me The Rodent!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick why are you doing this?

    Patrick Star: Because I need Krabby Patties! Hurry up i'm hungry!

  • Mr. Krabs: Release the condiments!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: With relish!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: See you later Te-am mate!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: If we're gonna be on the same team...

    Plankton: Maybe i don't wanna be on the te-am! You think of that?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: But Plankton everything's best when your part of a team.

  • Plankton: Will you stop playing that tiny piano? Your gonna get us caught!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Sorry.

  • Burger-Beard: I'm gonna scrub my armpits with you.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I don't get it.

    Squidward Tentacles: Because you're a sponge.

  • Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: [final scene] Mr. Squidward, front and center! I think we both know who rightfully deserves to wear that manager pin.

    Squidward Tentacles: I couldn't agree more, sir.

    Fish: Hooray for SpongeBob!

    [Crowd cheers]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Wait a second, everybody. There's something I need to say first. I just don't know how to put it.

    Squidward Tentacles: I think I know what it is. After going on your life-changing journey, you now realise that you don't want what you thought you wanted. What you really wanted was inside you all along.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Are you crazy? I was just going to say that your fly was down. Manager! This is the greatest day of my LIFE!

  • Patrick Star: SpongeBob, what happened?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Plankton cheated.

    Sheldon J. Plankton: Cheated?

    [Now to Neptune]

    Sheldon J. Plankton: Hold on there, baldy.

    [Now to SpongeBob]

    Sheldon J. Plankton: Oh, grow up. What, you think this is a game of kickball on the playground? You never had a chance to defeat me, fool! And you know why?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Because you cheated?

    Sheldon J. Plankton: No, not because I cheated! Because I'm an evil genius. And you're just a kid.


    Sheldon J. Plankton: A stupid kid!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I guess you're right, Plankton.

    [looks down]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I am just a kid.

    Sheldon J. Plankton: Of course I'm right. Okay, Neptune, time to kill.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: And you know, I've been through a lot in the past six days, five minutes, twenty-seven-and-a-half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, it's that you are who you are.

    Sheldon J. Plankton: That's right. Okay, Neptune...

    SpongeBob SquarePants: And no amount of mermaid magic...

    [Turns to Mindy]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: ... or managerial promotion...

    [Turns to the frozen Mr. Krabs]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: ... or some other third thing... can make me anything more than what I really am inside: A kid.

    Sheldon J. Plankton: That's great. Now, get back against the wall.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [over microphone] But that's okay!

    Sheldon J. Plankton: What? What's going on?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Because I did what everyone said a kid COULDN'T do! I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the Hasselhoff, and I brought the crown BACK!

    Sheldon J. Plankton: All right, we get the point.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: So, yeah, I'm a kid!

    [the lights go down, dry ice smoke surrounds SpongeBob, and a spotlight falls on him]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: And I'm also a goofball! And a wing nut! And a Knucklehead McSpazatron!

    Sheldon J. Plankton: [coughs from the smoke] What's going on here?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: But most of all, I'm...

    Sheldon J. Plankton: Okay, settle down. Take it easy!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm... I'M...

    Sheldon J. Plankton: WHAT THE SCALLOP?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [bursts into song] I'M A GOOFY GOOBER! ROCK!

  • Dennis: Finally.

    [cracks knuckles]

    Dennis: I got you right where I want you.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Can I help you with something, sir?

    Dennis: Name's Dennis. I've been hired to exterminate you.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: You're gonna exterminate us?

    [SpongeBob and Patrick look at each other, then burst out in laughter before wiping their tears]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Listen, Junior. You caught me and my friend here in a good mood today, so I'm gonna let you off with a warning. Step aside, and you won't have to feel the awesome wrath of our mustaches.

    Dennis: You mean these?

    [grabs the seaweed mustaches off SpongeBob and Patrick's faces]

    Dennis: I thought you still had a piece of salad stuck to your lip from lunchtime.

    [Throws mustaches as SpongeBob and Patrick's eyes bulge at the sight of them]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: They were fake?

    Dennis: Of course they were fake! This is what a real mustache looks like.

    [Pulls face mask off, grunts to sprout mustach from his upper lip]

    Patrick Star: Is he a mermaid?

    Dennis: All right. Enough gab.

    [approaches SpongeBob and Patrick, who are trembling in fear]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: What are you gonna do to us?

    Dennis: Plankton was very specific.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Plankton?

    Dennis: For some reason, he wanted me to step on you.

    Patrick Star: Step on us?

    Dennis: Yeah! That way, you'll never find out that he stole the crown!

    [SpongeBob and Patrick look at each other]

    Dennis: Uhh, perhaps I've said too much.

    [extends spikes from the soles of his boots. SpongeBob and Patrick tremble in fear as Dennis positions his boot above them]

    Patrick Star: That's a big boot.

    Dennis: Don't worry. This'll only hurt a lot!


    Dennis: I love this job!

    [Continues to laugh, only to be crushed by a bigger boot]

    Patrick Star: Bigger boot!

    [tries to run away]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Wait, Pat! This bigger boot saved our lives.

    Patrick Star: Yay!

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Thank you, stranger!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I am 100-percent MAN! And this MAN has got something to say to you!

    [blows Mr. Krabs a long raspberry]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: There! I think I made my point.

  • King Neptune: [to Spongebob] And as for you, be back with my crown in exactly 10 days.

    Patrick Star: [Appears out of nowhere] He can do it in nine.

    King Neptune: Eight.

    Patrick Star: Seven.

    King Neptune: Six

    Mr. Eugene H. KrabsSpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick!

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: [He and Spongebob attack Patrick]

    King Neptune: Six it is then.

    Patrick Star: [while being choked by Mr. Krabs] Five?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, shush!

  • Patrick Star: It's some kind of wall of psychic energy.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: No, Pat, it's a giant glass bowl.

  • [Last Lines]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [to squidward] Are you crazy? I was just gonna say that your fly is down. Manager! This is the greatest day of my life!

  • Patrick Star: SpongeBob?

    [sees him walking away from the trench, defeated]

    Patrick Star: Hey, where are you going?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm going home, Patrick.

    Patrick Star: But what about Mr Krabs?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: What about us? WE'LL never survive in that trench! You said it yourself, this is man's country. And let's face it, Pat. We're just... kids.

    Patrick Star: We're NOT kids!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: OPEN YOUR EYES, PATRICK! We blow bubbles, we eat ice cream - we worship a dancing peanut, for corn's sake! WE DON'T BELONG OUT HERE.

    Patrick Star: [defensively] We do NOT worship him!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [pulls Patrick's pants down] Patrick, you've been wearing the same Goofy Goober Peanut Party underpants for three years straight! What do you call that?

    Patrick Star: [starts to cry] Worship...? Oh, you're right, SpongeBob! We ARE kids!

    [runs away crying, then trips over pulled-down pants]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Pull your pants up, Patrick. We're going home.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Pull your pants up, Patrick. We're going home.

    Mindy: [just arrived in carriage] But you can't go home!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Mindy!

    Patrick Star: Mindy?

    [frantically pulls up pants before falling over again]

    Patrick Star: Huh?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: How much did you hear?

    Mindy: I heard enough.

    Patrick Star: Did you see my underwear?

    Mindy: No, Patrick.

    Patrick Star: [grabs pants] Did you want to?

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Don't worry, Mr. Krabs. Patrick, Squidward and I...

    Squidward Tentacles: [Leaving] Pass.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Uh, Patrick and I...

    Patrick Star: Hi.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: ...will bring back the crown and save you from Neptune's wrath. You have nothing to worry about. Your life is in our hands.

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: [worried] Ohh!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [at podium] People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Uh, SpongeBob...

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting an important news flash from Mr. Krabs. Go ahead, Mr. K.

    [Mr. Krabs whispers]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm making a complete what of myself?

    [Mr. Krabs whispers again]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: The most embarrassing thing you've ever seen?

    [Mr. Krabs whispers again]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: And now it's worse because I'm repeating everything you say into the microphone?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob! You didn't get the job!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [to Patrick, about driving the Patty Wagon] You don't need a license to drive a sandwich.

  • Attendant #1: You two dipsticks wouldn't last ten seconds over the county line!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, yeah? We'll just see about that.

    [they drive over the line; a thief stops them]

    Thief: Out of the car, fellas.

    [thief drives off with Patty Wagon]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: How many seconds was that?

    Attendant #2: Twelve.

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: ...IN YOUR FACE!

    [start laughing hysterically at attendants before walking away over county line]

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Feast your eyes, Patrick.

    Patrick Star: What is it?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: The Patty Wagon. Mr. Krabs uses it for promotional reasons. Let me show you some of its features: Sesame seed finish; steel-belted pickles; grilled leather interior; and under the hood, a fuel-injected French fryer with dual overhead grease traps.

    Patrick Star: Wow.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Yeah. Wow.

  • Mindy: [after getting SpongeBob's and Patrick's moustaches] So, now that you're men, can you make it to Shell City?

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: [are intrigued by moustaches and weren't listening to Mindy]

    Mindy: Guys!

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Yeah?

    Mindy: I said, "Now that you're men, can you make it to Shell City?

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Heck, yeah!

    Mindy: Are men afraid of anything?

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Heck, no!

    Mindy: And why?

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Because we're invincible!

    [both jump off cliff]

    Mindy: [calling after them] I never said that!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [after Mindy turns Patrick and Spongebob into men] Huh. I don't feel anything differ... oh my gosh, Patrick, you have a mustache!

    Patrick Star: So do you!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [crying in bar, then sits up] Alright, get it together, old boy. I know, I'll just stop thinking about it.


    SpongeBob SquarePants: Hey, you know, I actually feel a little better. I don't even remember why I was sad!

    Patrick Star: Hey, it's the new Krusty Krab 2 manager!

    [SpongeBob starts crying again]

    Patrick Star: Wow, the pressure's already setting in.

  • Patrick Star: Hey, look. Free ice-cream.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, boy!

    [SpongeBob runs to the "ice-cream booth" surrounded by piles of bones and skulls]

    Patrick Star: [to a skull] How you doing?

    [Looks around and sees the piles of bones and skulls]

    Patrick Star: Wait a minute. Wait a minute! SPONGEBOB!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Yeah?

    Patrick Star: Make mine a chocolate!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [drunk from too much ice cream] All right folks, this one goes out to my two bestest friends in the whole world: Patrick, and this big peanut guy! It's a little ditty called..."WAITER!"

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: And after the promotion ceremony, we're gonna party till we're purple.

    Patrick Star: Yay! I love being purple!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: We're going to the place where all the action is.

    Patrick Star: You don't mean...?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, I mean.

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: Goofy Goobers Ice Cream Party Boat!

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: [singing] Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah / You're a Goofy Goober, yeah / We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah / Goofy, goofy, Goober, goober, yeah!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Doesn't it seem a little harsh to kill someone over a crown?

    King Neptune: You don't understand. The crown is a symbol of my king-like authority. And, uh, between you and me... my hair is thinning a bit.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, Your Majesty, I'm sure it's not that noticea...

    [Sees Neptune's bald head]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Bald! Bald! Bald!


    Fish: MY EYES!

    King Neptune: All right, all right!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Are you on your way to the grand opening ceremony?

    Plankton: No, I'm not on my way to the grand opening ceremony. I'm busy planning to rule the world!

    [laughs evilly]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [cheerfully] Well, good luck with that!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [to Dennis on Hasselhoff's leg] I don't know what Plankton's paying you... But maybe these can make it worth your while.

    Dennis: You think I can be bought with five... what are these?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: That, sir, is five Goober dollars, legal tender at any participating Goofy Goober.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [pulling up to the gas station with Patrick in the patty wagon - a hamburger on wheels] Fill her up, please.

    Attendant #1: [looking at the patty wagon slightly bemused] What'll it be, fellas? Mustard or ketchup?

  • Mindy: Good luck, Spongebob!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Wait, how did you know my name?

    Mindy: Oh, I'm going to be queen of the sea someday! I've been learning the names of all the sea creatures.

    Patrick Star: What's my name?

    Mindy: That's easy! You're Patrick Star!

    Patrick Star: [blushes and laughs, lovestruck]

  • [the gas attendants are laughing at SpongeBob, Patrick and the Patty Wagon]

    Patrick Star: Are they laughing at us?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: No Patrick, they're laughing next to us.

  • Plankton: [Spongebob is running after stepping on Plankton] OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Eww, I think I stepped in something.

    Plankton: Not in something, ON SOMEONE, you twit!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Run, Patrick!

    Patrick Star: No. I'm tired of running. If we run now, we'll never st...

    [Dennis swats him aside]

    Patrick Star: Aaaah! Run, SpongeBob!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [didn't get the promotion] I'm ready. Depression.

  • Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: But before we begin the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [clapping rapidly] Yeah! Yeah! OWW! OW-HOWW! Yeah, now we're talking! Yeah! OWWW! Shhh!

  • Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob! You didn't get the job!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [shocked] What?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: You... did not... get... the job!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [sadly] But... but why?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Ah, SpongeBob. You're a great frycook, but I gave the job to Squidward because being manager is a big responsibility. Well, let's face it. He's more... mature than you.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm not... mature?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Ah, lad. I mean this in the nicest of ways. But there's a word for what you are, and that word is... now, let's see...

    Fish 1: Dork?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: No, wait, that's not right, not a dork, uh...

    Pearl: A goofball?

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Closer, but no, no, no.

    Fish 2: A ding-a-ling!

    Fish 3: Wingnut!

    Old Lady: A Knucklehead McSpazatron!

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: [angrily] Okay, that's enough!

    [back to SpongeBob]

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Look, what I'm trying to say is, you're just a kid. And to be a manager, you have to be a man! Otherwise they'd call it "kidager!" You understandager- I mean, you understand?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [quietly, now miserable] I guess so, Mr Krabs.

    [starts to walk away]

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: SpongeBob?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready... depression... I'm ready... depression...

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: Poor kid.

  • Squidward Tentacles: [Finds SpongeBob in his shower with him] SpongeBob! What are you DOING in here?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I have to tell you something, Squidward.

    Squidward Tentacles: Whatever it is, can't it wait until we get to work?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: There's no shower at work.

    Squidward Tentacles: What do you WANT?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I just wanted to let you know I'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.

    Squidward Tentacles: [shouts] GET OUT!

    [kicks SpongeBob out of the window]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [cheerfully, on the ground] Okay! I'll see you at the ceremony!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready! Promotion! I'm ready! Promotion!...

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Sorry to rain on your parade, Plankton.

    Plankton: Oh, don't worry about me. My parade will be quite dry, under my... umbrella!

    [pulls on a chain]

    SpongeBob SquarePantsMindyPatrick Star: Umbrella?

    [a Chum Bucket bucket helmet drops on Neptune]

    Mindy: Daddy, no!

    Plankton: Daddy, yes!

    [pushes button on remote]

    King Neptune: [Bucket activates] All hail Plankton.

  • Patrick StarSpongeBob SquarePants: [after finding their car finally, they both say in a high voice] Ah!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, no, how will we ever get back to Bikini Bottom now?

    David Hasselhoff: I can take you there.

    [Hasselhoff comes running up in slow motion]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Who are you?

    David Hasselhoff: I'm David Hasselhoff.

    Patrick StarSpongeBob SquarePants: Hooray!

    SpongeBob SquarePants: So, uh, where's your boat?

    David Hasselhoff: Boat?


  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Cleanliness is next to managerliness.

  • Waiter: [slowly swims into SpongeBob's vision as he wakes up] Hey. Hey, get up. Hey, come on, buddy. I wanna go home. Come on, pal.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [after recovering] Oh, my head.

    [He looks drunk]

    Waiter: Listen to me. It's 8 in the morning. Go scrape up your friend and get going.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: My


    SpongeBob SquarePants: ...friend?

    [notices Patrick lying under a collapsed table]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick. Hey, what's up, buddy?

    [falls over]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Wait, you said 8:00. I'm late for work. Mr. Krabs is gonna be...

    [remembers what happened the day before, face switches from horror to anger]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [Disgustedly] Mr. Krabs.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: You still have that bag of winds, buddy?

    Patrick Star: [Shows a bulge on his backside] Sure do.

    [Both laugh]

    Patrick Star: [Pulls out bag of wind, but not from the bulge] Here you go.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Uh...

    Patrick Star: What?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Nothing, nothing. Now, let's go over those instructions. Let's see, it says here; Step one: hold bag away from home.

    Patrick Star: [Holds bag away] Okay.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Step two: plant feet firmly on ground.

    Patrick Star: [Plant feet firmly on ground] Right.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Step three: pull out string, releasing the winds.

    Patrick Star: Check.

    [pulls string; bag slips from hands and flies away]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [to himself] It seems simple enough. Hold bag away from home, plant feet firmly on ground, pull out string releasing wind.

    [to Patrick]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay, let's do it for real.

    Patrick Star: Uh, SpongeBob?

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: For your information, we are not kids, we are men.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [having jumped from leg to leg on David Hasselhoff's body] Yeah! I did it!

    Dennis: [Dennis jumps and makes it] You've got guts, kid. Too bad I gotta rip em out of you!

    [makes a gesture like pulling guts out of one's body]

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Get it together old boy.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: We should be there in one more verse.

    SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick Star: [singing] Now that we're men...

    Dennis: [interrupting the singing] Finally!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [the diver's boot floats onto Hasselhoff's leg. From the bottom, Dennis emerges] Ah! Dennis!

    Dennis: Did you miss me?

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Take it easy, friend, I'm the manager of this establishment. Everything's gonna be juust fine.

    Phil: I'm really scared here, man.

    SpongeBob SquarePants: You got a name?

    Phil: Phil

    SpongeBob SquarePants: You got a family Phil?

    Phil: [can't speak, too scared]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [snapping his fingers] Come on Phil, stay with me, lets hear about that family!

    Phil: I got a wife, and two beautiful children

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Thats what it's all about. I want you to do me a favour Phil.

    Phil: What?

    SpongeBob SquarePants: Say cheese.

    [Slowly places the cheese in the Krabby Patty while a sound like a heartrate monitor starts speeding up in the backround]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: [after coming out of the Krusty Krab restaurant with the now smiling Phil holding a Krabby Patty with cheese] Order Up!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [riding a swimming David Hasslehoff] Go Hasslehoff!

    Patrick Star: Next stop Bikini Bottom!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Talk to me, Krabs.

    Mr. Eugene H. Krabs: It started out as a simple order. A Krabby Patty with cheese. When the customer took a bite, NO CHEESE!


    SpongeBob SquarePants: [slaps Mr. Krabs] Get a hold of yourself, Eugene.

    [narrows eyes]

    SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm going in.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Hooray! Gary! I had that dream again! And it's finally going to come true! Today! Sorry about this calendar. Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for The Krusty Krab 2, where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Who's it gonna be, Gary? Well, let's ask my wall of 374 consecutive employee-of-the-month awards.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready. Promotion.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Cleanliness is next to manager-lines. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: ee, la da doo, la da dum, Bum Bum Bum, Da da da

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I have to tell you something, Squidward.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: There's no shower at work.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I just wanted to say I'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay. see you at the ceremony.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, thanks, Patrick. And tonight, after my big promotion, we're gonna party till we're purple.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: We're going to the place where all the action is.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, I mean.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. You're a Goofy Goober, yeah. We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah. Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I'd better get going. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready,promotion... I'm ready,promotion... Eww, I think I stepped in something.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh. Sorry, Plankton. Are you on your way to the grand-opening ceremony?

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Well, good luck with that. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Yay! Yeah! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [Thinking] Yes.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [Thinking] He's right.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [Thinking] That's me.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Yes! Yeah! Oh, better luck next time, buddy. Yeah! All right!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: All right. Get it together, old boy. I know. I'll just stop thinking about it. Hey, you know, I actually feel a little better. I don't even remember why I was sad.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: No, Pat, you don't understand. I didn't get the promotion.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Mr. Krabs thinks I'm a kid.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: [sighs] I'm gonna head home, Pat. The celebration's off.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Yeah. I'm not in a Goober mood.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: A Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, huh? I guess I could use one of those.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Ooh!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Boy, Pat, that hit the spot. I'm feeling better already.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Waiter, let's get another round over here. Oh, Mr. Waiter. Two more, please.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Whoo!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Waiter. Oh, waiter. Waiter. Wai-toor. Waiter!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: All right, folks, this one goes out to my two bestest friends in the whole world: Patrick and this big peanut guy. It's a little ditty called...

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Waiter!

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I've got something to say about Mr.


    SpongeBob SquarePants: Krabs.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: Pardon me, miss.

  • SpongeBob SquarePants: I have worked for Mr. Krabs for many years and always thought he was a great boss.

Browse more character quotes from The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015)