Spencer Davenport Quotes in Unaccompanied Minors (2006)

Oliver Porter: Who trained you kids? The Navy SEALs?

Spencer Davenport: Look, sir, just... Divorce kids are more resourceful than others, that's all.

Grace Conrad: [putting on her glasses] Once a dork, always a dork.

Spencer Davenport: You are so not a dork.

Spencer Davenport: You're not going to be scared this time are you?

Katherine Davenport: Not after the night I've had.

Grace Conrad: If you guys get me sent back to that room, your dead!

Donna Malone: What are you gonna do, rich girl. Have your daddy hire a hit man?

Grace Conrad: Maybe I'll just have him break your dad out of jail.

Spencer Davenport: [hiding his face behind his hand] Hmmmm...

[Grace smirks at Donna, who reacts by attacking Grace and starting a fight]

Charlie Goldfinch: Girl fight! Girl fight! Oh, my gosh, it's a girl fight!

Grace Conrad: Where are my friends?

Spencer Davenport: Oh, man. Where's my sister?

Oliver Porter: They went where all the good little boys and girls go for Christmas. They went somewhere nice. Where, you ask? Why, the comfortable and festive Hoover International Lodge. Which is just a few thousand yards down from this delightful little room. Which now smells like a horse died in it.

Charlie Goldfinch: Oh, so we're going to the Lodge?

Oliver Porter: Uh, I think I have an answer to your question. Are you out of your juice-drinking little minds? Have you looked outside lately? The roads are blocked because there is a little thing called a blizzard going on. That's when the sky opens up and lots of snow falls and makes it hard for people to do things. Like fly to Hawaii, for instance.

Grace Conrad: Who's going to Hawaii?

Oliver Porter: Not me. Not anymore.

Spencer Davenport: Nachos. Oh, my mom never lets me eat those, you know? So, an order of those. She's banned all sodas from the house, so extra, extra, extra-large root beer.

Restaurant Hostess: My mom never let me eat mozzarella sticks.

Spencer Davenport: Mine either. Two orders. On to dessert, huh?

Restaurant Hostess: You don't have a tapeworm, do you?