Smart Brother Quotes in Undercover Brother (2002)

Undercover Brother: Are you telling me there really is a Man'?

Conspiracy Brother: What do you think? Things don't just happen by accident! Sometimes people - mostly *white* people - make things happen!

Undercover Brother: So the conspiracies we've believed for all these years are true? The NBA really did institute the three point shot to give white boys a chance?

Smart Brother: Absolutely!

Undercover Brother: Then the entertainment industry really *is* out to get Spike Lee?

Conspiracy Brother: Come on man! Even Cher's won an Oscar! Cher!

Undercover Brother: Then O.J. really didn't do it?

[Everyone looks away and mumbles]

The Chief: We... we ain't got time for this!

Undercover Brother: You know what they say, behind every great black man...

Conspiracy Brother: is the police.

Undercover Brother: No.

Smart Brother: A bunch of slow white athletes?

Undercover Brother: No!

White She-Devil: A cute butt.

Undercover Brother: NO!

Lance: Probable cause.

Undercover Brother: [Smart Brother tried to turn Undercover Brother into a white man expert by showing his various and random clips from white movies and t.v. shows. Undercover Brother begins screaming so they stop the clips] CAUCASIAN OVERLOAD! CAUCASIAN OVERLOAD! CAUCASIAN OVERLOAD! CAUCASIAN OVERLOAD!

Smart Brother: Are you alright?

Undercover Brother: [pauses with a horrified look on his face] ... I... see... WHITE... people

[after witnessing the General's speech]

The Chief: Smart Brother, you're so damn smart. Can you tell us what the Hell just happened?

Smart Brother: Well, uh, I, uh, um...

The Chief: [mocking him] Well, um, I, uh... Shut up! If I wanted to hear something stupid, I'd ask his skinny Black Ass!

Conspiracy Brother: Ha, ha! In your face! Ha! Skinny black... HEY!

[to Undercover Brother]

Smart Brother: If you're going to fit in to white America, you're gonna have to learn to like MAYONNAISE!