Slannen the Elf Quotes in Ella Enchanted (2004)

Slannen the Elf: Into the forest of certain death goes Slannen.

Ella: Thank you!

[after chaining Ella to a tree]

Slannen the Elf: You are one freaky chick.

Ella: Now, I need you to go back into the forest and rally all the elves and giants you can find.

Slannen the Elf: You want me to go back in there?

Ella: Yes. You're going to need all the help you can get. Now someone has to get back into the castle, find Benny and then keep Char away from Edgar.

Slannen the Elf: Why? What's going on?

Ella: I already told you, I can't tell you, but... but if you don't, you might be stuck singing "Kum-ba-ya" for the rest of your life!

Slannen the Elf: Open up! I am Miss Ella's legal representation.

Dungeon Guard: Her what?

Slannen the Elf: Her lawyer, numbskull! If the gauntlet doesn't fit, you must acquit.

Ella: I've met Prince Charmont, and I think he might be different from his uncle.

Slannen the Elf: Why? Cause he's a hunk?

Ella: No...

Slannen the Elf: What is he, about 6 foot?

Ella: Yeah, about.

Slannen the Elf: Yeah, I hate the guy already.

Slannen the Elf: [rustling] Oh no... The rustling always comes before the screaming and the running. I *knew* this was gonna happen! They're just gonna find pieces of us scattered across the forest.

Benny: [a rabbit hops out of the bushes] Oh, a bunny. You know, the last known case of a bunny attack was, well, *never*.

Ella: Why don't you like music?

Slannen the Elf: Oh that's right, because elves are supposed to be so happy and joyful all the time. Singin' and dancin' for the *man*. I don't want to be an entertainer. I want to be...

Ella: What?

Slannen the Elf: Nothin...

Ella: No, what were you going to say.

Slannen the Elf: Forget it. It's silly.

Ella: Please tell me.

Slannen the Elf: I want to be a lawyer.

Benny: I guess that would be in small claims court.

Ella: Oh, I forgot. The elfin restrictions Sir Edgar passed.

Slannen the Elf: No elf can be engaged in any profession other than singing, juggling or...

Ella, Slannen the Elf: ...tomfoolery.

Slannen the Elf: You know, I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you're much prettier than I would've expected.

Brumhilda: Oh, I know. Giants are supposed to be big, ugly and mean. It's because of stories like "Jack and the Beanstalk." Stinking Grimm Brothers!

[while Slannen rambles on, the ogres knock out the dungeon guard and try to eat him]

Slannen the Elf: [turning around] Excuse me, what is going on here?

NiSSh: Well, can we at least have him to go?

Slannen the Elf: Put the nice man down!

Slannen the Elf: Elves aren't that short you know. That's just a stupid myth created by that "Elves and the Shoemaker" story. Do I look small enough to fit in a shoe? Stinkin' Grimm Brothers!

NiSSh: You, into the pot.

[Ella walks over to pot]

Slannen the Elf: Forget them!

Ella: [turns around in surprise at ogres] Who are you?

NiSSh: I am the ogre, NiSSh. We just did this. Didn't we just do this? All right. That's enough fun and games. Now keep your mouth shut...

[Ella closes her mouth]

NiSSh: ...and don't move.

[Ella freezes]