Skip Skipperton Quotes in Mumford (1999)

Skip Skipperton: You've fallen in love with one of your patients? - Doc! It's not me is it?

Dr. Mumford: What! No, Skip. It's not you, but I like you a lot.

Skip Skipperton: Are you telling me that your last job before becoming a psychologist was an investigator for the IRS?

Dr. Mumford: Everybody has a story, Skip.

Skip Skipperton: Seems like you got the variety pack.

Dr. Mumford: I had no friends and I didn't talk to my family. The only constant stabilizing force in my life was drugs.

Skip Skipperton: An IRS investigator with a drug problem!

Dr. Mumford: Skip, you know that it is improper, completely unethical, for a licensed psychologist to carry on a romantic relationship with one of his patients.

Skip Skipperton: I guess it makes sense.

Dr. Mumford: Yes. Yes, it does.

Skip Skipperton: Do you know how I spend my every single solitary moment?

Dr. Mumford: Jerking off?

Skip Skipperton: No, that's a good guess though!

Skip Skipperton: I wish I could live in the shower.

Skip Skipperton: I may be young, but Doc, I can tell you that I'm very immature.

Skip Skipperton: [to Mumford] Oh, she doesn't know about it yet. Right now, out of the two of us, I'm the only one in love. But I'm really stoked!

Skip Skipperton: Far out

Skip Skipperton: Somebody's taking a shower down there.

Dr. Mumford: That'd be Lily.

Skip Skipperton: I wish I could live in the shower. I'd take five a day if I had time. I went to this spa in Germany, a sanitarium practically, up on this mountain. The great thing: they just kept you wet, all day.

Skip Skipperton: So, do you know what I've been doing, all alone in my workshop, for almost two years? How I spend my every solitary hour? What I've been working on, what the world really needs and no one has been able to create: a virtually life-like humanoid, gender-specific, anatomically functional, sexual surrogate-slash-companion.

Dr. Mumford: [Looking confused] "Slash-what"?

Skip Skipperton: Sexual surrogate-slash-companion.

Dr. Mumford: [still confused] A doll?

Skip Skipperton: No, doc. Not a doll! I am Panda Modems. I'm talking about much, much more than a doll. The world has never seen what I'm talking about - except maybe in the movies.