Skip Donahue Quotes in Stir Crazy (1980)

Skip Donahue: This filthy, roach-ridden reality is inspiring... what did that second policeman say to you when he grabbed you by the throat?

Harry Monroe: Man, I don't fucking believe you!

Skip Donahue: "Man, I don't fucking believe you!" Fabulous!

Harry Monroe: You don't get it do you, Skip. You think this is The Count Of Monte Cristo or something. We're in deep trouble. This is the real deal. We're in deep shit.

Skip Donahue: We tried to teach him charades! He didn't get it! He just didnt get it!

Warden Walter Beatty: You're gonna represent Glenboro prison in the annual Top Hand-competition. Congratulations!

Skip Donahue: Oh! Oh my god! Warden! I can't do that!

Warden Walter Beatty: What in the hell are you talking about...?

Skip Donahue: Well, I should have told you in your office! My mother was a veterinarian! I can't have anything to do with the exploitation of animals, she'd turn over in her grave!

Warden Walter Beatty: I don't believe you heard me correctly. This is very important to me!

Skip Donahue: Important to you? My mother is watching over every step I make! Do you know that my soul is on the line here...? So let's just drop...

[looks up]

Skip Donahue: What? I said no. Whoa, I told him no! Ma, are you crazy, I have witnesses... All right, we'll talk about it in my cell!

[looks at the warden]

Skip Donahue: Uhm... I have to go to the bathroom. Would you excuse me, warden?

[looks up at the sky again, and walks off]

Skip Donahue: What are you doing?

Harry Monroe: I'm gettin bad. You better get bad, Jack cause if you ain't bad you're gonna get fucked.

Big Mean: What's the charge?

Harry Monroe: Innocent.

Big Mean: Ain't we all?

Harry Monroe: Bank robbery?

Big Mean: Oh, shit.

Harry Monroe: Ooooh, shit!

Big Mean: You can kiss the baby.

Harry Monroe: Kiss the baby?

Skip Donahue: [to Big Mean] What baby is that sir?

Big Mean: Ask your lawyer.

[laughs and walks away]

Skip Donahue: I want a bigger cell! With better ventilation!

Deputy Ward Wilson: Why? Grossberger been fartin' on ya?