Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE Quotes in The Magic Christian (1969)

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Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE Quotes:

  • Youngman Grand, Esq.: Dad, do you think words corrupt?

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: I don't know, let's try. Agnes?

    Dame Agnes Grand: [looks up from the television] Yes?

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: Nipple.

    Dame Agnes Grand: Shh!

    [turns back to the television]

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [watches her a moment] Well, there's no immediate physical change.

  • Ginger Horton: Ah! My Second World War Nazi atrocity book came at last.

    [turns to Youngman, dog in her lap, and browses the book]

    Ginger Horton: Do you know what Bitsy and I do? We sit down and imagine all those atrocities being done to sex criminals. - Yes, sex criminals and the like. And that Dr Thorndike!

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [overhearing] What's that, Ginge? Bill Thorndike a sexy criminal?

    Ginger Horton: The man you sent me to. He behaved VERY strangely.

  • Traffic warden #27: What's your game, Mister?

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [riffling a wad of bills under the warden's nose, to persuade him to eat a parking ticket] Grand is the name, and, uh - money is the game. Would you care to play?

  • Sir John: [Oxford has just purposely rammed Cambridge, at the annual Boat Race] It would never have happened in my day!

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: Nor mine!

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: Well, it's happenin' in mine!

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [voiceover, as a £10 note appears onscreen] Ladies and gentlemen, this is what is commonly known as money. It comes in all sizes, colours, and denominations - like people. We'll be using quite a bit of it in the next two hours... luckily I have enough for ALL of us.

  • Hamlet: [Laurence Harvey, onstage] "To be..."

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: [loud enough to be heard, turning to Sir Guy] I've seen it.

    Hamlet: "Or not to be... that is the question."

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: Shakespeare, right?

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [whispers, eyes toward the stage] Right, and double right.

  • Youngman Grand, Esq.: You're certainly puttin' everybody on today, Dad.

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: Well, you know, Youngman, sometimes it's not enough merely to teach. One has to punish as well. A little bit of the old pause.

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: Cause for pause?

    Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: Yes.

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [as he and Youngman admire a painting] I like school of Rembrandt.

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: St. Rembrandt's High.

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [on being told a Rembrandt might fetch £10,000 at auction] In that case my final offer is thirty.

    Mr. Dougdale: [stunned] Thirty - thousand - pounds? Shit! I beg your pardon, I do beg your pardon.

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [a police car drives up to Grand's car] Could be routine, or... mere damnable harassment.

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [Lawrence Harvey performs a strip tease while playing Hamlet] This chap's taking licence in my view?

  • Sir Guy Grand KG, KC, CBE: [speaking with the Oxford crew, before the annual Boat Race] We have come here, in fact, to make you a very interesting offer...

    Youngman Grand, Esq.: ...of money.

    Oxford crew: [as the whole crew laughs] I think... I think they're trying to bribe us!

    Oxford coach: [giving a matter-of-fact look] They ARE.

Browse more character quotes from The Magic Christian (1969)

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