Sir Cedric Willingham Quotes in King Ralph (1991)

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Sir Cedric Willingham Quotes:

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: It's I who should be thanking you. You showed me how to be a king.

    Ralph Jones: Me? I was a lousy king.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: On the contrary. You are a good and decent man, and you've acted honorably. I shall try to follow your example.

    Ralph Jones: Thank you, Ced.

  • Phipps: Sir Cedric! Sir Cedric! Good news. We've finally found an heir!

    Sir Cedric Willingham: That's wonderful, Duncan. Who is he?

    Phipps: His name is Jones. Ralph Jones.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: Is he everything we've hoped for?

    Phipps: [embarrassed] Well. He has his strengths and his weaknesses. You see, he's

    [uncomfortable pause]

    Phipps: American.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: Quickly, Duncan! The strengths!

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: Your majesty, may I present the Sovereign King Mulamboa of Zambezi.

    Ralph Jones: [seeing that the king is black, using a Eubonics dialect] Hey, homes! Whas happenin'! Gimme quintet, brother!

    King Mulamboa: I do not comprehend, Your Majesty!

    Ralph Jones: Uh, welcome, Your Majesty. On behalf of the people of the United Kingdom...

    [uncomfortable silence]

    Ralph Jones: Uh, do you wanna go get a beer?

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: How's it going, Your Majesty?

    Ralph Jones: Great. We've got nothing in common and she's got a voice like a tuba. If she had her way, we'd have sex on a bed of nails on national television. But at least the party stinks.

  • Phipps: [after Ralph's odd meeting with King Mulamboa] I think he did pretty well, considering. It could have been much worse!

    Sir Cedric Willingham: Yes, he could have exposed himself, I suppose...

    Phipps: [phone rings, he picks it up] Yes?

    [to Cedric]

    Phipps: The Prime Minister for you, sir.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: [picks up other phone] Good afternoon, Prime Minister. Yes... Oh really? Well it's a strange world we live in, sir. Yes, thank you. Good bye.

    [hangs up, to Phipps]

    Sir Cedric Willingham: The Prime Minister just spoke to King Mulamboa. The King said he couldn't remember when he'd had so much *fun*...

    Phipps: [jumps up, overjoyed]

    Sir Cedric Willingham: [almost hugs Phipps, then stops] Um, sherry?

    Phipps: Yes, please...

  • [Cedric is leading Ralph through a portrait gallery]

    Sir Cedric Willingham: That's George III. You may remember him. He was king during that little temper tantrum you call the Revolutionary War.

    Ralph Jones: Sounds like sour grapes to me, Ced. After all, we did kick your ass.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: The loss is entirely yours, or rather *theirs*, try to remember you're an Englishman now.

    Ralph Jones: Okay, but I still think they kicked *our* ass.

  • Ralph Jones: Do you feel that being the king of a major nation is tougher than you thought?

    King Mulamboa: Yes, it is difficult sometimes, what with the ceremonial duties and official obligations. But I'm quite pleased with the economic progress my country has made. We are hoping to be the first in Africa to market an automobile!

    Ralph Jones: Oh really? I might be in the market myself soon. The Rolls just doesn't have that much "poop". This car gonna have fuel injection?

    King Mulamboa: Oh yes, everything. Five-speed transmission, rack-and-pin steering...

    Ralph Jones: Reclining buckets? Rear spoiler?

    King Mulamboa: No, but it will get excellent gas mileage.

    Ralph Jones: Gas mileage is fine, but keep in mind - the first question every car buyer asks themselves is 'Will this car get me laid?'

    Sir Cedric Willingham: [whispers to Phipps] Beautifully stated...

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: It is far easier to whisper advice from cover than to risk it's merit at the point of attack.

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: We'll put the velour industry on full standby.

  • Sir Cedric Willingham: It's not enough simply to be the king. You must look and act like one.

  • [Ralph is being measured for a suit]

    Sir Cedric Willingham: Just a few quick questions to probe your knowledge of English history...

    Ralph Jones: Fine.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: When she failed to give him a son, Henry VIII had Anne Boleyn - ?

    Ralph Jones: Look into adoption?

    Sir Cedric Willingham: Beheaded.

    Ralph Jones: Jeez, this is a tough country.

    [a tailor approaches with a bolt of fine black material]

    Tailor: Would this be to your liking, Your Majesty?

    Ralph Jones: You know, I kind of like that.

    [points at a bolt of pale blue and beige striped material inlaid with an elaborate pattern]

    Tailor: That's an upholstery fabric, Your Majesty.

    Sir Cedric Willingham: The English people don't generally like their monarch to look like a sofa.

Browse more character quotes from King Ralph (1991)

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