Schwartz Quotes in Heat (1995)

Vincent Hanna: I got an idea... of what they're looking at.

Vincent Hanna: You wanna know what they're looking at?

Vincent Hanna: I mean - is this guy something, or is he something?

Vincent Hanna: This crew is good.

Vincent Hanna: You know what they're looking at?

Schwartz: What?

Vincent Hanna: Us. The L-A-P-D. Po-lice Department... We just got made.

Vincent Hanna: [over the phone, after giving him instructions on how to set up a trap to catch Neil, referring to the gun shot wound he sustained during the shootout against Neil and his crew after the bank robbery] ok, how you feeling?

Schwartz: [looking at his right arm bandaged and wrapped in a sling] banged up but I'll live

Detective Casals: [walking around a metal container storage lot in the Los Angeles Harbor with Vincent, Drucker, Bosko, and Schwartz, recreating where Neil was walking and looking at with Michael and Chris] they were looking back in this direction, a container facility? what cartage theft? Too visible, too "low ball" for them.

Bosko: next door is a oil refinery, over there is scrap yard

Schwartz: oil refinery, pays only by check, no cash around, same for the scrap yard.

Vincent Hanna: [sarcastically] maybe they're stealing hub caps

Vincent Hanna: [looking in all directions] a oil refinery and a scrap yard, what the hell is going on?

Bosko: that's what we're trying to figure out, we thought we had them

Flick: Are you kidding? Stick my tongue to that stupid pole? That's dumb!

Schwartz: That's 'cause you know it'll stick!

Flick: You're full of it!

Schwartz: Oh yeah?

Flick: Yeah!

Schwartz: Well I double-DOG-dare ya!

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] NOW it was serious. A double-dog-dare. What else was there but a "triple dare you"? And then, the coup de grace of all dares, the sinister triple-dog-dare.

Schwartz: I TRIPLE-dog-dare ya!

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!

Mother: [gets on the phone] Hello, Mrs. Schwartz? Yes, I'm fine. Uh, Mrs. Schwartz, do you know what Ralph just said?

[Mrs. Schwartz's speech is inaudible]

Mother: No, he said...

[whispers it close to the receiver]

Mrs. Schwartz: [in a hysterical tone] NO, NOT THAT!

Mother: Yes, that! Do you know where he heard it?

Mrs. Schwartz: Probably from his father.

Mother: No! He heard it from your son!

Mrs. Schwartz: [screams hysterically] WHAT! WHAT! WHAAAAAAT!

[footsteps are heard followed by screaming and spanking]

Schwartz: [crying] Ah, no! What did I do, Ma? What, I didn't do nothing! AAAAUUUUGGGGHHH!

[Ralphie's mom hangs up the phone]

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Another shot of mysterious, inexorable, official justice.

Schwartz: Hey, smart ass. I asked my old man about sticking your tongue to a flagpole in the winter, and he says that it'll freeze right to the pole, just like I told ya.

Flick: Ah, baloney. What would your old man know about anything?

Schwartz: He knows, because he once saw a guy stick his tongue to a railroad track on a bet, and the fire department had to come get the guy's tongue off the track, because he couldn't get it off.

Randy: [is trying to catch up] C'mon, guys! Wait up! C'mon, guys! Wait up!

[Last lines]

Tanya: Isn't somebody gonna come and take him away?

Schwartz: Yeah, in just a few minutes. You really liked him didn't you?

Tanya: The cop did... the one who killed him... he loved him.

Schwartz: Well, Hank was a great detective all right.

Tanya: And a lousy cop.

Schwartz: Is that all you have to say for him?

Tanya: He was some kind of a man... What does it matter what you say about people?

Schwartz: Goodbye Tanya.

Tanya: Adiós.

Schwartz: Intuition?

Ramon Miguel 'Mike' Vargas: Why not? Quinlan doesn't have a monopoly on hunches.

Schwartz: So it turns out Quinlan was right after all.