Scanlon Quotes in Masterminds (2016)

Scanlon: Katie Candy Cane, is she a stripper?

Scanlon: [holding up a picture of David Ghantt] Look at him. He looks like Kenny Rogers and Kenny Loggins had a lovechild... and then Kenny G, he just showed up to the birthday party, started playin' the flute, and messed this boy up.

Scanlon: [Nilo has been shot] What're you gonna do with all that money, you hump? Talk to me! What're you gonna do?

Nilo: Get... laid! Best whore in Managua!

Scanlon: Two whores! Two best whores in Managua!

Nilo: You do it. For me.

Scanlon: You read about this place in the travel brochures?

"Serrano": I heard it had a healthy climate.

Scanlon: Not what you expected though?

"Serrano": It was exactly what I expected!

Scanlon: We're carrying three cases each. One is enough to blow out your fire, six cases will blow out the whole field. That means you don't think all the trucks will make it, one of us is a backup.

"Serrano": We want double, and legal residence... or we don't drive.

Corlette: You leave in four hours.

Nilo: Where are you from?

Scanlon: Listen Pancho, I've been clocking you every second you've been in this town. If you wanna pick your nose in this truck, you better clear it with me first, otherwise I'm taking you and this nitro right into a ditch!

Scanlon: Where am I going?

Vinnie: All I can say is it's a good place to lay low.

Scanlon: Why?

Vinnie: It's the kind of place nobody wants to go looking.

Corlette: You know there's a place down here that might be kind of nice for a guy in your situation. Ever think about going to Managua?

Scanlon: Managua... shit, there's no way I can go to Managua.

Scanlon: You wanna tell me where I'm going?

Vinnie: I swear to Christ I don't know.

Corlette: [Corlette is observing Scanlon's truck-driving technique] Teamsters?

Scanlon: Greyhound.