Sarah Quotes in I Am Number Four (2011)
John: [Reaching for book] What's this?
Sarah: Umm... That is kind of private, actually.
John: It's amazing!
Sarah: Ok, that's enough.
John: [Flipping through book] What, you're allowed to look at everyone else-take our pictures- and we're not allowed see you?
John: Seems like you want to run away.
Sarah: Just be happy when I can get out of here.
John: I don't know - been to a lot of places...
Sarah: You don't have to give me that "there's no place like home" speech, I've heard it.
John: No, No - You can go wherever you want. See whatever you want to but, um... a place is only as good as the people you know in it. I... I think this is a pretty good place.
John Rambo: [from the Director's Cut] Go live your life 'cause you've got a good one.
Sarah: It's what I'm trying to do.
John Rambo: No, what you're trying to do is change what is.
Sarah: And what is?
John Rambo: That we're like animals! It's in the blood! It's natural! Peace? That's an accident! It's what is! When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing. When the killing stops in one place, it starts in another, but that's okay... 'cause you're killing for your country. But it ain't your country who asks you, it's a few men up top who want it. Old men start it, young men fight it, nobody wins, everybody in the middle dies... and nobody tells the truth! God's gonna make all that go away?
John Rambo: Don't waste your life, I did. Go home.
John Rambo: Why'd you come back?
Sarah: Waiting for you.
John Rambo: I told you before, I can't help you.
Sarah: Well, we need to go and help these people. We're here to make a difference. We believe all lives are special.
John Rambo: Some lives... some not.
Sarah: Really? If everyone thought like you, nothing would ever change.
John Rambo: Nothing does change.
Sarah: Of course it does! Nothing stays the same!
John Rambo: Live your life, 'cause you've got a good one.
Sarah: It's what I'm trying to do!
John Rambo: No, what you're trying to do is change what is.
Sarah: And what is?
John Rambo: Go home.
Sarah: You know, you never told us your name.
John Rambo: John.
Sarah: Where are you from?
John Rambo: Bowie, Arizona.
Sarah: Why'd you leave?
John Rambo: I got drafted in 'Nam.
Sarah: And you just stayed?
John Rambo: It's complicated.
Sarah: You have family back home?
John Rambo: Father, maybe. I don't know.
Sarah: Aren't you curious to see how things might've changed back home?
John Rambo: Gotta have a reason for that.
Burnett: What did you do? We came here to help stop the killing! Who are you to...
John Rambo: [grabs Burnett by the throat, and slams him up against a support beam] WHO ARE YOU?
Sarah: Let him go!
John Rambo: They would've raped her fifty times... and cut your fucking heads off! Who are you? Who are any of you?
Sarah: What do we do?
School Boy: Nothing we can do.
Sarah: The man you were talking to...
John Rambo: I wasn't talking to anybody.
Sarah: All right. The man who was talking to you asked if we could hire you to take us upriver. You said no. Why?
John Rambo: Can't help you out.
Sarah: Well, if you have good reasons, would you mind if I heard them?
John Rambo: Go home.
Sarah: I don't know what to say.
John Rambo: Then you shouldn't say anything, should you?
Chris: Hi. Um... My name is Chris Parker. I live in Oak Park. That's a suburb.
Brad: They probably figured that out. Ha.
Chris: This is Brad, Sara and Daryl. And we're in trouble.
Daryl: Ain't no doubt.
Chris: See, me and my boyfriend Mike, tonight's our anniversary. But then he went and cancelled. And now I'm stuck watching these three. And it's so hard...!
Albert Collins: And it's so hard!
Chris: Babysitting these guys.
Band: She's got the...
Chris: I got this call from Brenda. I went to pick her up. The tire had a blowout. And my mom's car got shot up.
Sarah: And these guys started to chase us.
Brad: And we all got hijacked. Ha!
Daryl: We're cruising down the highway.
Chris: In this big ol' Cadillac. And it's so hard!
Albert Collins: And it's so hard!
Chris: Babysitting these guys.
Albert Collins: She got the babysitting blues.
Band: Baby, baby. Babysitting blues.
Chris: I've got the babysitting blues.
Albert Collins: There's nights you swear you were born to lose. Like tonight. And you wish your feet were walking in someone else's shoes.
Chris: Some guys are out to get us.
Daryl: And Brenda's probably dead.
Brad: We ain't got a nickel.
Albert Collins: And they should be in bed! And you outta luck.
Chris: I got enough watching these guys. I've got the babysitting blues.
Sarah, Brad, Daryl: Baby, baby.
Chris: What should I do?
Sarah: Get in the car and run him over.
Brad: Where we gonna get 50 bucks?
Sarah: We could sell Daryl. You think?
Chris: So, when the babysitter looked more closely at the kids, she saw that... THEY HAD NO FACES!
Sarah: Oh my God!
Chris: Just a pool of mushy goo!
Sarah: Like Spaghetti-O's?
Chris: Spaghetti-O's with meat!
Sarah: [Trying to convince Chris not to leave her alone with Brad] What if the house explodes?
Chris: The house is not going to explode!
Sarah: You leave him here alone, and it will!
Chris: Brad? Sarah? That's not your parents' car is it?
Sarah: Yes it is!
Brad: Oh my God it is!
Daryl: What are we going to do?
Chris: Everybody duck!
[the kids duck down and drive past the Andersons]
Mrs. Anderson: Look at that lunatic! You know, Brad and Sarah are going to be driving in a couple of years and they'll be sharing the road with people like that.
Chris: Brad, how fast do your parents drive?
Brad: I don't know... forty-five?
Chris: We'll go eighty.
Chris: Don't worry. We'll get home. This has all just been a big mistake.
Sarah: What about Brenda?
Brad: That was her parents' mistake.
Daryl: The chick is losing it.
Chris: I am not!
Sarah: [to Daryl and Brad] You guys want some candy?
[Brad takes the chocolate bar from Sara. Chris turns and knocks the candy bar from his hands]
Chris: Brad, no chocolate! Your acne! Sara. It is time for your cough syrup. Daryl, fasten the seat belt!
Sarah: She's definitely losing it.
Chris: I am not losing anything, I am still in control here! Got it?
Chris: Babysitting blues.
Sarah, Brad, Daryl: Baby, baby.
Chris: Babysitting blues.
Albert Collins: Now, there're nights
Chris: You swear you were born to lose. Yeah!
Albert Collins: Like tonight.
Chris, Albert Collins: And you wish your feet were walking in someone else's shoes.
Albert Collins: Some guys are out to get them. And the girls's probably dead. She ain't got a nickel.
Sarah, Brad, Daryl: And we should be in bed!
Albert Collins: You're outta luck.
Chris: I got enough watching these guys. I've got the babysitting blues.
Everybody: Baby, baby.
Chris: Babysitting blues.
Everybody: Baby, baby.
Chris: Babysitting blues.
Sarah: [about Dawson] Its Thor!
Brad: No it's no not Sara.
Sarah: [to Dawson] Don't listen to him, he says you're a homo.
Dawson: [Angrily grabs Brad by shirt] You spreading lies about me, kid?
Brad: [Nervously] Who, me? Never!
Daryl: Mike what?
Chris: Mike what what?
Daryl: Mike what what what are we talking about? What's his last name?
Chris: Toddwell. Are you writing a book?
Daryl: Mike Toddwell? Do you know him?
Brad: They go out.
Daryl: He's got a red Camaro, right?
Chris: Oh, gee, Daryl, are you a gear head and a sex fiend? Anyway, a lot of people have Camaros.
Daryl: Yeah, but do a lot of people have the license plate "So Cool"?
Chris: That's Mike.
Daryl: He's the guy who beat me up last summer for touching his car, which I didn't do.
Brad: That was him?
Daryl: That was him!
Chris: Mike wouldn't do that.
Daryl: Yes, he would!
Chris: He would not.
Daryl: Yes, he would. He did. He kicked my ass. Wanna see the footprint?
Chris, Brad, Sarah: NO!
Nurse: Dr. Nuhkbane, the guy with the stab wounds just died.
Dr. Nuhkbane: Oh dear.
Chris: Oh, Doctor, we're looking for our friend.
Dr. Nuhkbane: Your friend? Which one is he?
Chris: Um, he's the one with the stab wounds.
Dr. Nuhkbane: Oh dear.
Dr. Nuhkbane: I'm sorry. Your friend is dead.
Sarah: Hey, wait! I know why you aren't acting like yourself. You don't have your special helmet!
[off the look Dawson gives her]
Sarah: See you have the baseball cap, but you're supposed to be wearing this
[takes off her Thor helmet]
Sarah: Here, take mine. Go on, take it!
Dawson: You're giving this to me?
Sarah: Well, yeah, you're my hero!
Dawson: [Smiles] Here. Here, take the car.
[Tosses Chris the keys]
Sarah: Thanks, Thor.
Dawson: Hey kid! I got one of these at home
[throws Sarah's helmet back]
Chris: Could I get your address so I can mail you the five dollars?
[the group piles into the station wagon and pulls out of the Garage]
Brad: Sarah, where's the peach crayon?
Sarah: I used it all to color Thor.
Brad: Great! So what am I suppose to use to cover my zits?
Sarah: You want orange?
Brad: I can't believe you used it all just for that picture of Thor.
Sarah: Thors my hero!
Brad: Thors a homo.
Sarah: Take that back, Brad. Brad! Take it back Brad! Take back what you said about Thor! If you don't take back what you said about Thor, I'll tell Chris about all those love notes you write about her.
Brad: Okay. I take it back.
Sarah: Thanks. Hi, Chris!
Chris: Hi, Sarah!
Brad: I just think you should give other guys a chance.
Chris: Like who?
Sarah: Don't say it! Don't say it!
Brad: Like me?
Brad: What's so funny?
Chris: Well, it's just that... you're just a child.
Brad: And you're just a girl in love with an asshole.
Brad: Forget it!
Sarah: [voiceover] If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever.
Sarah: [voiceover] People once believed that when someone dies, a crow carries their soul to the land of the dead. But sometimes, something so bad happens that a terrible sadness is carried with it and the soul can't rest. Then sometimes, just sometimes, the crow can bring that soul back to put the wrong things right.
Sarah: A building gets torched, all that is left is ashes. I used to think that was true about everything, families, friends, feelings. But now I know, that sometimes if love proves real, two people who are meant to be together, nothing can keep them apart.
Sarah: It's more like surfing than skating. I wish the rain would stop just once.
Eric Draven: It can't rain all the time.
Sarah: What are you supposed to be, a clown or something?
Eric Draven: Sometimes.
Albrecht: Now Sarah, she's a genuine hot dogger. You hungry?
Sarah: You buyin'?
Albrecht: I'm buyin'.
Sarah: No onions though, okay?
Albrecht: No onions?
Sarah: They make you fart, big time.
Sarah: Step into the light. Turn around.
Robin Hood: Am I to dance next?
[after Sarah and Marian get the better of Bull and his companion, they bring them to meet Robin]
Robin Hood: What happened to your eye, Bull?
Bull: We were set upon by, like, ten...
Much the Miller's Son: Uh, 12!
Bull: 15 large, big lads.
Sarah: Oh, yeah?
Sebastian: Well, your objections have been duly noted and summarily overruled.
Sarah: Yes, Sir!
Sebastian: How come when you say "Yes, Sir" it kinda sounds like "Fuck you!"
Matt: Sarah's on the warpath, so I suggest you play nice.
Sarah: This is bullshit, Sebastian, bullshit.
Sebastian: Good morning to you, too!
[Isabelle has been made visible and put in her cage]
Matt: Man, look how peaceful she is.
Sarah: Yeah, if I didn't know better, I'd say nothing happened to her.
Sebastian: Yes, so let's schedule a vivisection for Monday. I want to check her neural pathways.
Sarah: You just brought her back, and now you're gonna slice up her brain?
Sebastian: I'm not runnin' a goddamn zoo! All right?
Sarah: You're a fucking unethical bastard.
Matt: Whoa, whoa, whoa. He's kidding.
Matt: Tell her you're kidding, right?
Sebastian: Right. I don't want to cut her up for another few weeks.
Sebastian: You think I'm trying to kill Isabelle?
Sarah: Kill? More like liquefy
Sebastian: Sarah? Are you awake?
[Then proceeds to unbutton her shirt and feel her breast]
Sarah: [Wakes up realizing her shirt's unbuttoned] Sabastian? Are you in here? I know you're in here.
[Looks at the monitor and sees Sabastian back in his bed]
Frank: What are you doing kissing this guy?
Sarah: I didn't wanna kill him.
Frank: What kind of stupid logic is that?
Sarah: Why does Han hate you so much?
Frank: Not enough hugs as a child.
Sarah: Where did you get the bodies?
Victoria: [Deadpan] From my freezer.
Han Cho Bai: You blew up my plane!
Marvin: I was wrong? So we're not even gonna *die*?
Frank: Not yet.
Han Cho Bai: I was actually starting to like you. I was even thinking about not killing you. This is what happens when you try to save the world.
Victoria: Han, Han. You can't put a price on these things.
Han Cho Bai: You owe me 30 mil for the plane, and 20 for not killing you! You're a dead man, Moses.
Frank: Thanks for your help. Really.
[starts walking away]
Sarah: You think he means it?
Frank: Nah, he's a nice guy.
Han Cho Bai: I mean it, Frank!
Victoria: [to Marvin] They're gonna be right as rain.
Marvin: [whispering] He made the run to emotional safety.
Frank: What are we doing?
Sarah: Let's face it, Columbo, Things were getting a little stale.
Marvin: Wow. Mommy just slapped Daddy at the dinner table!
Marvin: Frank is a very simple creature with very simple needs. Okay? It's killing, eating, sexting, eating... Killing, I guess.
Sarah: What's your point?
Marvin: I can't believe you kissed The Frog!
Sarah: Well, I've kissed a lotta frogs.
Marvin: [pointing to his own body] Two shots here and here. Drag the body in there and repeat as necessary.
Sarah: No safety.
Marvin: No safety.
Sarah: [shooting up a third-world bar]
Marvin: [wearing a fruit headpiece] Don't look at me, she's your girlfriend.
Frank: Ah, come on...
Sarah: I didn't know what to do, I didn't want to kill him!
Frank: So you chose to kiss him?
Frank: Baby, check this out. Ha, a power washer? We need one of these.
Frank: On the patio in the back yard.
Frank: Should we go look at those window treatments?
Frank: Do you want one of those hotdogs? They're very good.
Sarah: Baby, you are a heck of a homemaker. You know that? But we could just go to dinner. Er...
Frank: Well, you know. If you don't make it...
Sarah: You don't eat it.
Frank: You know what? That's a great idea. What if I make you dinner? I'm gonna get that grill. The big shiny one. Will you get us some shrimp? The big jumbo kind. Four down, three over. Come back and find me down here. In "tools".
Frank: You gave her a gun?
Marvin: It is America, Frank.
Sarah: Everyone else has a gun.
Frank: She has no idea what to do with this.
Sarah: I know exactly what to do with it!
[grabs gun back and accidentally fires]
Frank: You don't give fire to a kitten! Why don't you just give her dynamite, Marvin.
Sarah: No external safety on the Sig?
Marvin: [stunned] No.
The Frog: [after Sarah seduced and kissed The Frog to help her] You, I'll help.
Sarah: [Looks at Katja after getting the key] And you can suck it!
Frank: Baby? Honey?
Sarah: Seriously? You hooked up with that?
The Frog: What a woman!
Sarah: [Slaps Frank repeatedly so he could come to] He's out.
Marvin: He might be awake.
Sarah: Oh, good. So he can feel it. Did you ever, ever in your entire CAREER let yourself get drugged? You still like her! And now she has the key!
Marvin: She doesn't have the key. She has a key.
Marvin: I knew she would play him like a banjo at an Ozark hoedown, so I have the key.
Frank: [Mutters after getting slapped one more time] Water.
Frank: What is it you wanted to talk to me about?
Katja: Russia wants complete access. You agree now or I will hand you to the U.S. government.
Sarah: [Looks at Marvin and whispers] Can't we just kill her?
Han Cho Bai: You blew up my plane.
Han Cho Bai: I was actually starting to like you. I was even thinking about not killing you. This is what happens when you try to save the world.
Victoria: Han. Han, you can't put a price on these things.
Frank: You owe me 30 mil for the plane and 20 for not killing you. You're a dead man, Moses.
Frank: Thanks for your help, really.
Sarah: You think he means it?
Frank: Nah, he's a nice guy.
Han Cho Bai: I mean it, Frank!
Frank: All right.
Sarah: [after Katja captured The Frog before she did] I hate her so much!
Frank: We didn't come to Paris on vacation.
Sarah: Oh. Shopping's what I thought you did in Paris with your boyfriend's money while you're waiting for him to wake up from being taken down by his skanky, slutty, Russian biatch ex-girlfriend. So thanks, thanks. Thanks for the compliment for the fur. For telling me that I look nice in my dress. It makes me feel really good, and it makes me feel very loving towards you also.
Frank: Why is she doing this to me?
Sarah: Help me! I don't want to die!
Gabe: You're not gonna die.
Kim Jong Il: [from animated storyboards] And take the girl to my bedroom.
Kim Jong Il: [as Koreans start releasing Sarah] No, not that one! The pretty one!'
Sarah: [Calling after Kim Jong Il, Korean guards and Lisa] That's right, take the pretty one instead of the one who has something to offer!
Spottswoode: Team, I'm afraid I have bad news. At 7:15 this morning, the terrorists carried out their attack.
Sarah: But how can that be? Gary stopped the terrorists in Cairo.
Spottswoode: It appears now that I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E was wrong about the Chechnyans being in charge. That was bad I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. Very bad I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E.
Intelligence: I'm sorry.
Sarah: I believe there's a place where the restless souls wander. Burdened by the weight of their own sadness, they wait for a chance to set the wrong things right. Only then can they be reunited with the ones they love. Sometimes, a crow shows them the way. Because sometimes, love is stronger than death.
Sarah: Life is just a dream on the way to death.
Sarah: There's a reason why you've been brought back, Ashe.
Ashe Corven: To find the people who did this to us. To make them pay.
Sarah: Gotta name?
Grace: Grace. So what?
Sarah: My name is Sarah. Listen, Grace, maybe you wanna get some hot coffee and a little bit of food.
Grace: What do you want?
Sarah: Are you okay?
Tattoo customer: It stings a little.
Sarah: Well, that's why they call me the mistress of pain.
ffolkes: I didn't know they had women on these things.
Sarah: Yes, things are getting better in that way.
ffolkes: A gigantic step backwards!
Sarah: Mama, Iggy has promised to bring me a cuirassier's helmet to use as a work basket - without blood in it, Mama.
Duchess of Richmond: And one for me, young man - *with* the blood.
Sir William Ponsonby: And where do you plan to stick your Frenchman, Hay?
Lord Richard Hay: I thought under the right arm, sir.
Sarah: See? He has it all planned.
General Sir Thomas Picton: When you meet a cuirassier beam-to-beam, you'll be lucky if you bring away your life with you, never mind his helmet. Boy, you'll learn the art of fighting from the French.
Sarah: General Picton doesn't know how to walk in a ballroom.
Duke of Wellington: But he is very good when he is dancing with the French.
Sarah: [to Scudder] You're just an opportunistic prick who'd fuck mud if it'd move a little and not argue too much.
Matthew 'Matt' Scudder: You have quite an education haven't you?
Sarah: Anyone who gets passed the age of two has an education.
Sarah: I can't believe this macho bullshit.
Sarah: Look who's decided to join us! You owe me a carton of cigs, Doc. He thought you were dead when we found you.
Knox: Sounds like a great doctor.
Doc Potter: Veterinarian, actually.
Knox: Who're you then? His nurse?
Sarah: You may have him convinced, his brain's probably affected by some of that male bonding shit, but that smoke doesn't effect me. I'll be watching you.
Knox: Thank God. My guardian angel's on vacation.
Jacob: Can you run?
Sarah: [nervous yes]
Jacob: Good, we're about to do a lot of it.
Sarah: What the fuck?
Sarah: That's not fair!
Jareth: You say that so often, I wonder what your basis for comparison is?
Sarah: Give me the child.
Jareth: Sarah, beware. I have been generous up 'til now. I can be cruel.
Sarah: Generous? What have you done that's generous?
Jareth: *Everything*! Everything that you wanted I have done. You asked that the child be taken. I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for *you*! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations. Isn't that generous?
Sarah: Give me the child. Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered, I have fought my way here to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child that you have stolen. For my will is as strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great...
Sarah: For my will is as strong as yours, my kingdom as great... Damn.
[pulls the Labyrinth book out of her pocket]
Sarah: I can never remember that line.
Sarah: You have no power over me.
Sarah: You're horrible!
Hoggle: No, I ain't. I'm Hoggle.
Sarah: Okay, let's handle this thing logically. What exactly have you sworn?
Didymus: I have sworn with my life's blood, none shall pass this way without *my* permission!
Sarah: Well... May we have your permission?
Didymus: Well I, uh... I... that is, uh... hm... Yes?
Sarah: You're him, aren't you? You're the Goblin King! I want my brother back, please, if it's all the same.
Jareth: What's said is said.
Sarah: But, I didn't mean it.
Jareth: Oh, you didn't?
The Worm: 'Allo.
Sarah: Did you say... hello?
The Worm: No, I said "'allo," but that's close enough.
Sarah: Oh... you're a worm, aren't you?
The Worm: Yeah, that's right.
Sarah: You don't by any chance know the way through this labyrinth, do you?
The Worm: Who, me? No, I'm just a worm. Say, come inside, and meet the missus.
Sarah: Through dangers untold. And hardships unnumbered. I have fought my way here to the castle; beyond the goblin city, to take back the child that you have stolen. My will is as strong as yours, and my kingdom as great...
Jareth: Stop! Look what I'm offering you. Your dreams.
Sarah: My kingdom as great... my kingdom as great... damn, I can never remember that line.
Jareth: I ask for so little. Just fear me. Love me. Do as I ask, and I shall be your slave.
Sarah: You have no power over me!
Sarah: [the clock chimes 13:00 at that moment. Defeated, Jareth sends Sarah and Toby back to the real world where the clock finishes chiming midnight]
Jareth: I've brought you a gift.
Sarah: What is it?
Jareth: It's a crystal. Nothing more. But if you turn it this way and look into it, it will show you your dreams. But this is not a gift for an ordinary girl who takes care of a screaming baby.
Sarah: Help! Stop it! Help!
Helping Hand: What do you mean "help"? We *are* helping.
Different Helping Hand: We're Helping Hands.
Sarah: You're hurting!
Helping Hand: Would you like us to let go? Heh-heh...
[They loosen their grip, Sarah starts to slide downward]
[They catch hold of her again]
Helping Hand: Well then, come on, which way?
Sarah: Which way?
Helping Hand: Up, or down?
Helping Hand: Come on, come on.
Different Helping Hand: We haven't got all day.
Different Helping Hand: Well, it's a big decision for her.
Different Helping Hand: Which way do you want to go, hm?
Helping Hand: Yes, which way?
Sarah: Well... since I'm pointed that way, I guess I'll go down.
Helping Hand: She chose DOOOOOWN!
Different Helping Hand: She chose *down*? Heh!
[they let go]
Sarah: Was that wrong?
Helping Hand: Too late now!
Jareth: Hello, Hedgewart.
Sarah: I can bear it no longer! Goblin King! Goblin King! Wherever you may be take this child of mine far away from me!
Goblin: That's not it! Where did she get that rubbish? It doesn't even start with "I wish!"
Ludo: [in the mirror] Goodbye, Sarah.
Didymus: And remember, fair maiden, should you need us...
Hoggle: Yes, should you need us, for any reason at all...
Sarah: I need you, Hoggle.
Hoggle: You do?
Sarah: [nods] I don't know why, but every now and again in my life - for no reason at all - I need you. All of you.
Hoggle: You do? Well... WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?
[she spins around and sees them all in her room, including the goblins. She hugs them all, and a huge party begins]
Jareth: Turn back, Sarah. Turn back before it's too late.
Sarah: I can't. Don't you understand I can't?
Jareth: What a pity.
Sarah: [after eating the peach] Hoggle, what've you done?
Hoggle: [leaves in fear] Oh, damn you, Jareth. And damn me, too.
Fiery 1: Hey! Hey! Her head don't come off!
Sarah: Of course it doesn't!
Fiery 2: Hey, lady! Where are you going with a head like that?
Fiery 3: Hey, man! I know what we can do! Take off her head! Ha-ha!
Hoggle: This is an oubliette, labyrinth's full of 'em.
Sarah: Really. I didn't know that.
Hoggle: Oh don't act so smart. You don't even know what an oubliette is.
Sarah: Do you?
Hoggle: Yes. It's a place you put people... to forget about 'em!
Hoggle: Them's my rightful property. It's not fair.
Sarah: No, it isn't. But that's the way it is.
Didymus: [finally entering the castle] Well, come on then!
Sarah: No! I have to face him alone.
Didymus: But why?
Sarah: Because that's the way it's done!
Didymus: Well, if that is the way it is done, then that is the way you must do it. But, should you need us...
Hoggle: Yes, should you need us...
Sarah: I'll call.
Sarah: I wish the goblins would come and take you away! Right now!
Left Door Knocker: Huh. Doesn't want his ring back in his mouth, eh? Can't say I blame him.
[Sarah holds the Right Door Knocker's nose so that he has to open his mouth; she stuffs the ring back in and knocks; the door opens]
Right Door Knocker: [muffled] That's all right, I'm used to it.
Hoggle: What did you have to go and do a thing like that for?
Sarah: Do what? You mean rescue you?
Hoggle: No! You kissed me!
Sarah: Ow! It bit me!
Hoggle: What'd you expect fairies to do?
Sarah: I thought they did nice things, like... like granting wishes.
Hoggle: Shows what *you* know, don't it?
Hoggle: You have to understand my position. I'm a coward. And Jareth scares me.
Sarah: What kind of a position is that?
Hoggle: No position! That's my point.
Sarah: [during battle] Ludo, call the rocks!
Sarah: C'mon feet.
Sarah: [seeing a Goblin aiming his cannon at her] Whoa, Nellie, duck!
[the Goblin fires]
Hoggle: [laughs] Missed!
Sarah: Once upon a time, there was a beautiful young girl whose stepmother always made her stay home with the baby. And the baby was a spoiled child, and wanted everything to himself, and the young girl was practically a slave. But what no one knew is that the king of the goblins had fallen in love with the the girl, and he had given her certain powers. So one night, when the baby had be particularly cruel to her, she called on the goblins for help!
Goblin: [inside the closet] Listen!
Sarah: "Say your right words," the goblins said, "and we'll take the baby to the castle, and you will be free!" But the girl knew, that the Goblin King would keep the baby in his castle for ever and ever and ever, and turn it into a goblin! And so the girl suffered in silence. Until one day, when she was tired from a day of housework, and she was hurt by the harsh words of her stepmother, and she could no longer stand it...
Left Door Knocker: It's very rude to stare!
Sarah: Oh! I'm sorry, I was just wondering which door to choose.
Left Door Knocker: HUH?
Right Door Knocker: [muffled] It's no good asking him, he's deaf as a post!
Left Door Knocker: Don't talk with your mouth full!
Right Door Knocker: [muffled] I'm not talking with my mouth full, I...
Sarah: Wait, wait, I can't understand you.
[she takes the ring out of his mouth]
Right Door Knocker: Ah! Mm. Oh, oh, it is so good to get that thing out.
Sarah: What were you saying?
Right Door Knocker: I said, it's no good talking to him, he's deaf as a post.
Left Door Knocker: Mumble mumble mumble! You're a wonderful conversational companion!
Right Door Knocker: You can talk, all you do is moan!
Left Door Knocker: No good! Can't hear you!
Sarah: What's behind these doors?
Left Door Knocker: WHAT?
Right Door Knocker: Search me. We're just the knockers!
[she goes to the left door, pushes on it]
Sarah: How do I get through?
Left Door Knocker: HUH?
Right Door Knocker: Knock, and the door will open!
Ludo: [with the ring in his mouth] Hmmph?
Sarah: [amused] Ludo!
[she takes the ring from Ludo, holds it out to the Right Door Knocker]
Right Door Knocker: Hey! I don't want that thing back in my mouth!
Sarah: C'mon, I want to knock!
Right Door Knocker: MM-MM!
Hoggle: And you wouldn't be so brave if you'd ever smelled the Bog of Eternal Stench. It's, it's...
Sarah: Is that all it does, is smell?
Hoggle: Oh, believe me, that's enough! But the worst thing is, if you so much as set a foot in the Bog of Stench, you'll smell bad for the rest of your life. It'll never wash off.
Sarah: It's not fair!
The Junk Lady: What's the matter, my dear, don't you like your toys?
Sarah: [comes to her senses] It's all junk!
The Junk Lady: [picks up a music box] Well, what about this? This is not junk, eh?
Sarah: [smashes music box] Yes, it is!
[Sarah's room crumbles without her notice]
Sarah: I have to save Toby!
Sarah: Would he tell me that this door leads to the castle?
Guard: [Whispers with his counterparts] Yes?
Sarah: So... the other door leads to the castle and this one leads to certain death.
Guard: [All the guards Oooh] But he could be telling the truth!
Sarah: But then you wouldn't be. So if he told me that this door leads to the castle, the answer you should give me would be 'No'
Guard: But I could be telling the truth!
Sarah: But then he would be lying. So then if he said this door led to the castle, I'd know the answer would still be 'No'
Guard: Is-is that right?
Guard: [snickers] I don't know! I've never understood it!
Sarah: No, no, I figured it out!
[Pushes the other door open revealing the castle's interior]
Sarah: I could never do it before! This is a piece of cake!
[Steps through the door and falls into a trap]
Beth: Sarah... don't leave me like this.
Sarah: No. Please don't ask me to do that.
Sarah: I can't. I can't do that. I can't do that.
Sarah: OK. Shh. Close your eyes.
Sarah: What about you Holly, got a man ?
Holly: Oh I'm a sports fuck like Juno.
Sarah: [Sarah uses Holly's camera in night vision mode and sees all of the dead animal bones] Dead animals! Hundreds of them!
Beth: This is not good, guys.
Sam: Can we get out of here?
Rebecca: Which way?
Juno: [Uses lighter to try and find the breeze] Come on.
[the lighter's flame does not move]
Juno: I don't know.
Beth: What do you mean you don't know?
Juno: There's no breeze! It could be any one of these tunnels! Take your pick!
Rebecca: Oh, fuck it!
Juno: [trying to calm down Rebecca] Please!
Rebecca: [continuing to yell] Is there anybody there?
Beth: [also yelling] Hello!
[a crawler suddenly appears behind Beth]
Tom: I'm sorry about your baby.
Sarah: I'm sorry about yours.
Tom: Mine was almost 40.
Sarah: Yeah, but he'll always be your baby.
Joost: I tried to quit once. But then I thought, "Why?" My grandmother, she drank and she smoked her entire life, and she lived to be 103 years old. Now what does that tell you?
Sarah: It tells me that everyone who is trying to quit something always has an ancient relative they use as an example of why not to quit.
Joost: I suppose that make me into a cliché, then.
Sarah: You said it.
Joost: [Tom & Joost walk into town, Tom passing Sarah, seated, & Joost stops to introduce himself] Hi. I'm Joost, from Amsterdam
Sarah: Dutch, eh? Got any drugs?
Joost: [shouts ahead to Tom] I love this woman!
Tom: It wears off quickly, I promise you
Joost: [to Sarah] What are you looking for?
Sarah: Something to help me sleep. I've been having trouble, the last few weeks
Joost: I have some Ambien... or perhaps you'd prefer something stronger?
Sarah: [shouts ahead to Tom] I love this man!
Tom: It wears off quickly, I promise you
Sarah: Doesn't this guy ever stop to smell the flowers?
Sarah: [while chain smoking another cigarette] The end of the Camino is the end of my addiction.
Tom: Spoken like a true addict.
Sarah: Well, Jack, maybe a dog fight near a cheese farm is simply a dog fight near a cheese farm.
Jack: [Excitedly] AH! Okay... That's good. That... is very... good! Maybe I should adopt a more conservative attitude instead of trying to tickle meaning out of every curve in the road. Oh, Christ... I haven't had an original thought in months! Writer's block...
Sarah: Everything alright?
Sarah: Why is it that self-righteousness always goes hand-in-hand with resistance movements?
Sarah: Please give me the strength to do well. To not be arrogant. But to not be weak. Amen.
Doc: [as he treats her would] Most people don't like to look.
Sarah: I'm looking because I don't want to.
Benji: You probably wouldn't like what you find here anyway.
Sarah: Why is that?
Benji: Well, because this is the end of the road. There's no where to hide.
Sarah: And you think I'm not tough enough for the truth.
Benji: No, I think you're not soft enough for it.
Benji: I guess you *don't* like it better on the outside.
Sarah: The jam worked.
Benji: Is that why you came back?
Sarah: I came back because I missed being uncomfortable.
Sarah: Gentlemen, we are in 32 countries, protecting your good names. Which is why it is essential very few have ever heard of ours.
El Supremo: The choice is yours. It is simple. Either join us and tell your companions on the boat to do likewise, in which case all of your supplies will be turned over to us.
Nick, chief engineer: Or else?
El Supremo: We shall kill you. Then kill your companions and take the supplies.
Sarah: He'll kill us all anyway.
El Supremo: That is in the hands of God. But, if you pray to me, He may find it in His heart to--
Nick, chief engineer: I'll not pray to any man! Let alone a child who's hardly old enough to wipe his own bottom!
Sarah: [they run outside while a guy is screaming and getting run over by the monster truck] What was that?
Harley: It definitely wasn't Colonel Mustard in the study with a candlestick I'll tell you that!
Adam: I can't understand why you're being so nice to me.
Sarah: It's nice being nice to the nice.
Adam: I don't know how you can say that, I'm not even man enough to stick up for the girl I like.
Sarah: You like me?
Julie Powell: Do you really think I'm a bitch?
Sarah: Well, yeah.
Julie Powell: I know.
Sarah: But who isn't?
Julie Powell: Julia.
Sarah: [voiceover, blogging] Yesterday, I poached an egg. It seemed like the perfect thing to do on perhaps the second worst workday in recorded history.
Sarah: Explain to me how you've never eaten an egg in your whole life ?
Julie Powell: I've had eggs in, like, cakes, never had an "egg" egg. I was a very willful child. It's simmering.
Julie Powell: I had this notion, God knows why, that poaching eggs would be simple.
[Julie breaks an egg]
Julie Powell: But I was deeply wrong.
Sarah: [Sarah read the cookbook] "Immediately and gently push the while over the yolk with a wooden spoon for two or three seconds." Immediately.
Julie Powell: [Julia stirs but without success] Yurk, disgusting!
Sarah: Oh, maybe the eggs aren't fresh. Julia says the eggs have to be fresh.
Julie Powell: They are fresh.
Sarah: Okay, You don't have to bite my head off. I'm just quoting Julia.
Julie Powell: [voiceover, blogging] It took three of us, crammed into the kitchen over a pot of simmering water, but, enventually, we nailed it.
Julie Powell: Welcome.
Eric Powell: How cute is that ?
Alex: I wonder if there are ghosts.
Sarah: The house is new.
Alex: I mean the ghosts of the wolves. Grrr!
Sarah: Stop it!
Sarah: Remember, no tricks, only treats!
Minnie: He says he doesn't have anything that'd help us.
Alan Dershowitz: You with me?
Raj: What's paydirt?
Alan Dershowitz: He's a lawyer. If he really didn't have anything, he'd give it to us. But there's something there, and he's going to fight like hell to hold onto it.
Sarah: I think it's easier to love somebody than to live with them. Love is fantasy - living is work.
Alan Dershowitz: I'll say. And *those* people don't like to work.
Sarah: But if you don't do the work, the love dies and nobody wants to deal with that one.
Sarah: He had a gorgeous mistress and he went with an ugly whore?
Raj: You know, there are some things even mistresses won't do.
Alan Dershowitz: Like what?
Raj: I am not telling.
Sarah: You should not drink so fast, Monsieur Lautrec. It burns your stomach.
Henri: I'm thirsty. Please.
Sarah: Wine is for thirst.
Henri: At least you did not say water.
Sarah: Water is for Americans.
Henri: Some men can swing by their heels on the flying trapeze. Some men can become president of the republic. I can drink cognac.
Harry: Tell me, exactly, how long it is that you've been working here?
Sarah: Two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, what... two hours?
Harry: And how long have you been in love with Karl, our enigmatic chief designer?
Sarah: Ahm, two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, an hour and thirty minutes.
Harry: I thought as much.
Sarah: Do you think everybody knows?
Sarah: Do you think Karl knows?
Sarah: Oh, that is... that is bad news.
Harry: Well I just thought maybe the time had come to do something about it.
Sarah: Like what?
Harry: Invite him out for a drink and then, after about twenty minutes, casually drop into the conversation the fact that you'd like to marry him and have lots of sex and babies.
Sarah: You know that?
Harry: Yes, and so does Karl. Think about it, for all our sakes. It's Christmas.
Sarah: Certainly. Excellent. Will do. Thanks, boss!
[Karl has given Sarah a lift home after the Christmas party. They are standing on her doorstep]
Karl: Well, I-I'd better go.
[he gives her a quick peck on the cheek, then they begin to kiss passionately]
Karl: Actually, I don't *have* to go.
Sarah: Right. Good.
Karl: I mean...
Sarah: No-no that's good. Just, um, would you excuse me for one second? Just...
[she moves round the corner, out of sight of Karl, dances a little jig for joy, then returns]
Sarah: Um, okay, that's done. Um, why don't you come upstairs in about ten seconds.
Sarah: [on phone] Hello, darling. No, no I'm not busy. No - fire away.
Sarah: Do you love him?
Mark: Uh, b- What?
Sarah: No, I... I just thought I'd ask the blunt question.
Michael: [Michael enters the kitchen, sees Sarah standing in front of the open refrigerator] You know, that's the problem with these things. You have to watch them every minute.
[Takes a small carton of milk from the refrigerator]
Michael: Oh, hey, did I miss Karen and Richard?
Sarah: No, just Richard; Karen's staying for the weekend.
Michael: But not Richard?
Sarah: Went back to be with the kids.
Michael: Oohhhh, interesting. What did Richard have to say about that?
Sarah: Michael, if you're going to sleep this late, you're going to miss a few minidramas.
Michael: I just hope you'll wake me for anything really ugly.
[about getting pregnant]
Sarah: It doesn't always happen the first time.
Meg: That's not what they told us in high school.
Meg: I've been taking my temperature and I know I'm ovulating right now. The ground is ready, I just need someone to plant the seed.
Sarah: Yeah, but who's going to be the lucky farmer?
Karen: I know this is hard but it's all beautiful.
Sarah: Yeah we put on a great funeral here.
Michael: [sarcastically] Yeah, maybe I'll have mine here.
Sarah: We give first priority to people who kill themselves in one of our bathrooms.
[the three stop smiling]
Sarah: That was a terrible thing to say... I don't know why I said that.
Nick: [in a high-pitched voice] Hey. everyone, it's J.T. Lancer! Let's all go watch this incredible show!
Sarah: Woo hoo!
[everyone runs into the living room]
Karen: Come on, Sam.
Sam Weber: [lagging behind] Jesus!
Sarah: I know he wasn't happy. That doesn't tell you much. I'd no idea how bad it was. I think he purposely wanted to cut off from all of us because he was so unhappy with where he was at.
Karen: Is that true, Chloe? Did you feel that?
Chloe: I don't know. We had some good times. I haven't met that many happy people in my life, how do they act?
Nick: Mm hm.
Winifred Sanderson: Sisters, All Hallow's Eve has become a night of frolic, where children wear costumes and run amok!
Sarah: Amok, amok, amok, amok, amok.
[Winifred punches Sarah in the stomach]
Sarah: [singing in the sky] Come little children, I'll take thee away / Into a land of enchantment / Come little children, the times come to play / Here in my garden of magic.
Winifred Sanderson: Twist the bones and bend the back
Sarah, Mary Sanderson: Itch-it-a-cop-it-a-Mel-a-ka-mys-ti-ca
Winifred Sanderson: Trim him of his baby fat
Sarah, Mary Sanderson: Itch-it-a-cop-it-a-Mel-a-ka-mys-ti-ca
Winifred Sanderson: Give him fur black as black, just
Mary Sanderson: Like
Winifred Sanderson: Why? Why was I cursed with such idiot sisters?
Sarah: Just lucky, I guess.
Master's Wife: Okay that's it, party's over! Get out of my house!
Master: Now, pudding face.
Master's Wife: Shove it, Satan!
Sarah: Ooh. Thou mustn't speak to Master in such a manner.
Master: They call me Master.
Master's Wife: Wait 'til you see what I'm gonna call you. Now, tart-face, take your Clark bars and get out of my house!
Winifred Sanderson: Make us!
[the witches gather around her]
Master's Wife: Ralph, sic 'em!
[the witches runs out of the house in fear]
Sarah: What is this place?
Mary Sanderson: It reeks of children!
Winifred Sanderson: It is a prison for children.
Winifred Sanderson: Don't get your knickers in a twist! We're just three kindly old spinster ladies.
Mary Sanderson: Spending a quiet evening at home.
Sarah: Sucking the lives out of little children!
[Winifred chokes Sarah]
[Sarah is pushed onto the "black river", but lands straight up]
Sarah: 'Tis firm! 'Tis firm as stone!
Winifred Sanderson: Why, it's a road!
Winifred Sanderson: Therefore, it stands to reason, does it not, sisters dear? That we must find the book, brew the potion and suck the lives out of the children of Salem before sunrise. Otherwise it's curtains. We evaporate! We cease to exist! Dost thou comprehend?
Mary Sanderson: You explained it beautifully, Winnie. They way in which you started out with the adventure part and slowly.
Sarah: Explained what?
Winifred Sanderson: Come, we fly!
Sarah: I am alive!
Winifred Sanderson: Damn that boy, he's tricked us again.
Mary Sanderson: Oh, you're right, you're always right.
Winifred Sanderson: [Interjects] It's my curse, that and you two! Get off me you thundering oafs!
Max: You've messed with the great and powerful Max! Now you must suffer the consequences! I'm going to summon the burning rain of death!
Winifred Sanderson, Sarah, Mary Sanderson: [murmuring together] The burning rain of death?
Max: [lights lighter]
Winifred Sanderson: Look, he makes fire in his hand.
Max: [raises lighter to sprinkler, and the spreads out his arms wide]
Winifred Sanderson: It's the burning rain of death! Come, you fools!
[pulls them off to the side]
Sarah: Dead man's toe! Dead man's toe! Dead! Dead! Dead!
Winifred Sanderson: Sisters! Behold!
Sarah: I am beautiful! Boys will love me!
Mary Sanderson: We're young!
[laughs and claps excitedly]
Winifred Sanderson: Well younger. But! It's a start!
Mary Sanderson: [the sisters dance laughing] Oh my, Winifred, you are the mere sprig of a girl!
Sarah: Farewell, mortal bus boy!
[Room 309 is buzzing, Ted answers]
Ted the Bellhop: What do you want now, for Christ sakes? Who died?
Sarah: I don't know, but she's in my bed.
Ted the Bellhop: What?
Sarah: There's a dead body in my bed.
Ted the Bellhop: Nonsense! That's just your brother sound asleep.
Sarah: No! There's a woman's dead body *inside* the bed in the mattress.
Ted the Bellhop: You saw the body?
Ted the Bellhop: Impossible! You've got the ointment on your eyes. You can't see shit! Now go to sleep!
[hangs up, but the room is still buzzing, answers again]
Ted the Bellhop: Go to sleep!
Sarah: I washed it off.
Ted the Bellhop: The mentholatum?
Sarah: Yeah. Didn't you ever think to do that? Get your ass up here and call the police, because there's a dead body in my bed, and it smells like shit, and it looks even worse. And if you don't help us, my dad is going to lay you down right next to her, I swear to fucking God!
[hangs up, dial tone]
Ted the Bellhop: I am coming up there right this minute! And if there isn't a dead body in that room by the time I get up there, I'm going to make one! You...
Ted the Bellhop: Little bitch.
Sarah: There's a dead body in my bed and it smells like shit and it looks even worse. And if you don't get your ass up here now, my Daddy's gonna lay you down next to her. I swear to fucking God!
Sarah: Did you ever open your eyes?
Ted the Bellhop: Yes. And look at me now.
Sarah, Juancho: We can't.
Tom: Okay, whatever. Listen, you get guests here from all over the world, it's up to you to have some American on your signs.
Sarah: He means English.
Tom: I specifically asked for a compact.
Sarah: This is a European compact.
Tom: No, this is a Ringling Brothers compact! I don't understand it. I loooked at the brochure and it had a Fiesta on the cover, not a Bingo!
Sarah: Baby, just floor it.
Tom: I *am* flooring it! If I pushed any harder, my foot would blow through the floor and we would be Flintstone-ing our asses there!
Tom: [weilding a fire poker] Hello Peter! So happy you could join us!
Sarah: Tom what are you doing?
Tom: I was thinking, that it's time for Peter and I to TANGO!
[smashes vase with poker]
Peter: He's crazy! See you have no furture with this guy.
Sarah: Peter, shut up. Tom you're acting like a crazy person.
Tom: Oh yeah? Well, maybe that's cause I just got hit in the head with a ten-pound ashtray !
Peter: I'm warning you Leizak
[strikes a kung fu stance]
Peter: I studied karate with a Grand Master.
Tom: Yeah? Well I sure hope he showed ya how to pull a fire poker outta your ass!
Sarah: Tom, you're acting like a crazy person!
Tom: Well, MAYBE it's cuz I just got hit in the HEAD with a ten pound ASHTRAY!
[Shrugs his shoulders sarcastically]
Tom: Are you going to tell me what really happened with Peter?
Sarah: Are you going to tell me what really happened with red bra?
Tom: Nothing happened
Sarah: I hope you used a condom
Tom: I hope Peter used a condom
Sarah: I'm sorry, they don't make condoms that big.
Tom: That's funny
[to a fellow passenger]
Tom: we've got a comedian here
Sarah: You wanna hear something funny, I'm moving out when we get back
Tom: I'm just gonna stop talking
[The other passengers clap]
Sarah: [to customs agent] No, but my husband does have two pounds of hash in his rectum.
Stewardess: Return to your seat please
Sarah: [Inside bathroom] Just a minute
Stewardess: Return to your seat now please, playtime is over
Sarah: BEAT IT STEW!
Stewardess: The captain has turned the fasten your seat belt light on
[The stewardess knocks on the door, Sarah imitates her, she imitates her again, they both knock once, Tom and Sarah knock the door into her face]
Sarah: Is that a Thunderstick A-200o
Tom: When did you become an expert?
Sarah: I told you about that night in college.
Tom: But you never told me about the hardware.
Sarah: Getting a visual
Tom: We gotta charge this thing
Sarah: That plug won't fit in European outlet.
Tom: I'll make it fit.
Sarah: Don't force it.
Tom: Hey, we're in this together.
Sarah: Do you have four guys staring at your boobies right now? No.
Sarah: Tom, have you ever not told me something cause you were afraid of how I would react? Like have you ever not told me the truth about anything?
Tom: Like when I told you I liked your brother?
Sarah: This is serious Tom.
Tom: I am serious, I really don't like him.
Sarah: [crying on wedding night] Tomorrow my parents are going to know I'm not a virgin anymore!
Tom: You haven't been a virgin since college.
Sarah: Yeah, but tomorrow they're going to know for sure.
Tom: So, everyone thinks we're crazy for doing this, huh?
Sarah: Since when do we care what people think.
Sarah: [to Tom] We were evicted from a five star hotel, given the boot and now we're yelling at each other well not really, I'm yelling! I'm sorry I want to go home.
Tom: Maybe we should just have sex.
Sarah: Call me crazy, but I'm not in the mood to make love to you.
Sarah: Grazie, grazie, grazie
[slaps man helping her up]
Sarah: Grazie, grazie god dammit.
Sarah: I miss doing time in prison with you.
Sarah: Cheese and rice.
Sarah: I didn't come here to tell you that I can't live without you. I can live without you. I just don't want to.
Sarah: Maybe every girl in my family have to sleep with you.
Beau Burroughs: I don't know if they have to, but they certainly have.
Annie: I'm the most screwed-up person in the world!
Sarah: You're not even the most screwed-up person in this room!
Sarah: If you're gonna marry someone you might as well marry your best friend.
Jeff: [to Sarah in the elevator, after she has apologized] If we have a daughter, Beau Burroughs doesn't come within a thousend miles of her.
Sarah: It stops with me!
Sarah: ...and you drive *so* slow...
Earl: I only drive slow, sweetheart, because you're in the car
Sarah: This isn't The Graduate, this is Deliverance!
Sarah: I'm not afraid of flying. I love flying. It's crashing I hate. Hate crashing.
Sarah: Am I over-thinking this?
Jeff: You're not under-thinking it.
Blake Burroughs: Wanna have sex?
Sarah: Excuse me?
Blake Burroughs: No... I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I just, I was looking for my father, this is supposed to be his table but I don't see him anywhere. So, if he comes by, tell him Blake was here for me, would ya?
Sarah: Who is your dad?
Blake Burroughs: Beau Burroughs.
Jeff: So you're gonna just walk up to him and ask him point-blank?
Sarah: Well, I guess I could walk in and yell "Hey, Dad", and see if he turns around.
Sarah: I said knock three times!
Jeff: Do you want me to go back out and do it again?
Sarah: My sister... she bounces.
[Robin has just announced that her husband is buying Ben's Red Sox tickets. Lindsey asks whether she means for just that day]
Robin: No, I mean like forever. For $125,000, it better be forever.
Sarah: Are you guys that rich?
Sarah: Why don't you dress better?
Sarah: Die, Nazi spin bitch!
[at the gym, Lindsey and Robin are wearing boxing gloves and are hitting punching-bags]
Robin: You know what's happening here? You're being colonized.
Lindsey Meeks: What?
Robin: Colonized. It's like in the old days, when the French and the English would go into Asia and Africa, and they'd raise their flags, and they'd impose their culture, and they'd colonize. It's like, Sarah, when you cut your hair 'cause that guy liked short hair.
[Sarah rolls her eyes]
Lindsey Meeks: Well, wait a minute. You guys are married. Isn't that a part of it? Accommodating each other? You know: How many kids are we gonna have? Where are we gonna live? What pizza place are we gonna order from? Doesn't it require some pliability? Because maybe that's something that I've been lacking in my life.
Robin: [implacably] Isn't it affecting your work?
Lindsey Meeks: No. Not so much.
Molly: You know what I just realized? You're rooting for her relationship to fail.
Robin: What? That's right, why would I do that?
Molly: Never mind.
Robin: No. No, come on, tell me.
Molly: All right. You and Lindsey are both very competitive. Especially with each other.
Robin: She's more competitive than I am!
Lindsey Meeks: I am not!
Molly: And when you were both starting out, you were the more successful one. But now Lindsey's career has skyrocketed, and she's more successful. But you've had the personal success, the marriage. And if Lindsey gets that too, then she's definitely the winner, so you're rooting against her.
[Robin socks Molly in the face]
Dorcas: Which of the boys slept in this bed, do you suppose?
Sarah: [gasps] Dorcas Galen!
Dorcas: What's the matter? Didn't you ever think of that; that you're sleeping in one of *their* beds?
Rev. Elcott: [after rounding up the girls] We're all fathers here and we love you, so don't be afraid to answer. A while back I heard a wee babe crying in the house. Whose is it?
[girls look at one another]
Rev. Elcott: Whose is it, don't be afraid to tell?
Dorcas, Alice, Sarah, Liza, Ruth, Martha: [all at once and smiling] Mine!
Sarah: I want to be in love. I want to wake up next to someone and see them smile, do the whole Sunday breakfast thing, go out and get the paper, stay in bed together all day.
Jake: That's what it was like when I met Sarah. Anyway that's what I
Sarah: I made you nauseous?
Jake: In a good way - I was lovesick.
Sarah: [laughing] That was good, honey.
title cards: [in front of two dogs who played Mother Teresa] No animals were harmed during the filming of this movie.
title cards: Though we were petted within an inch of our lives.
Carol: Where are your boob shirts?
[holds up Sarah's sweaters]
Carol: Your *boob* shirts!
Christine: Don't worry, I brought some of mine!
Bob: You sure you don't want to come in, we just opened a bottle of wine.
Sarah: Oh I think I'd rather die, but thank you.
Deli Guy: Hi, can I help you?
Sarah: Single chicken breast please.
Deli Guy: You know for an extra $0.75 cents you can get the whole fryer here. Two breasts, two thighs and a wing, today's special.
Sarah: Thank you, I don't know when I'd eat all that.
Deli Guy: It's just an extra $0.75 cents.
Sarah: It's not the $0.75 cents, I hate to see food go bad.
Deli Guy: Oh, we got a hundred recipes here. You can always cook 'em up freeze 'em and...
Sarah: Look, Listen to me mister! I'm divorced ok? I eat alone, usually standing over the sink, I don't want a bunch of chicken hanging around, ok? Thank you.
Sarah: They had to cut me out of the snow with scissors.
Sarah: You're in different leagues Dad, you and Dolly. I think she's really started falling for you.
Bill: Well, I'm sorry if... if...
Sarah: No, you're not, because being a man today means never having to say you're sorry.
Christine: [Sarah is in the bath and not picking up the phone] Sarah, it's me, Christine. Pick up. Come on, Sarah. I already talked to Dad.
Sarah: [sighs and answers the phone] Who else knows?
Christine: No one.
Sarah: Come on, Carol has to know.
Christine: Why does Carol have to know? Couldn't I once know something before she does?
Sarah: [realizing] She's there with you, isn't she?
Sarah: Hello, Carol.
Carol: [small beat] Hi, Sarah. I was telling Chris it's a shame I didn't know about this before because I would have called Uncle Chet. We could have doubled.
Sarah: Oh, no. This story is going to be immortalized into family history, isn't it? Told and retold at Thanksgiving dinner, year after year...
Carol: Oh, not just Thanksgiving. I think it's a good Christmas story to.
[both Carol and Christine laugh]
Sarah: Bye guys.
Christine: [laughing] Wait. Tell the truth. One a scale of one to ten how would you rate Dad as a date? Hot, super hot?
[Sarah hangs up]
[Jake and Sarah are trying to buy some condoms because neither of them had any; Jake returns from a store to the car]
Jake: They're out!
Sarah: How can they be out?
Jake: I have a theory about this. Everyone in the city is having sex at the exact same time... except for us. But we will press on.
Marc: He has balls of steel.
Sarah: We're very proud.
Carol: Hello! Don't worry, it's just me. I'm in the kitchen. I filled your freezer again. There's now enough meat to feed every guy who answered your ad and still...
[Walks in from the kitchen and sees Jake]
Sarah: Jake Anderson, my sister Carol. Jake did, in fact, answer the ad.
Jake: Do I get my meat?
[Carol tosses him the meat]
Jake: [Driving in search of condoms] So this pre-school of yours, it's what? Traditional, developmental, Montessori?
Sarah: Yeah, yeah, all that. Drugstore!
Sarah: [to the scientist who want her to breathe nitrous oxide] I don't know, my parents told me never to breathe anything from strangers.
Regina Belmont: [Regina comes in to rescue the kids with a revolver] Hey, get your hands up.
[the scientists and kids raise their hands and Regina picks up the toy bunny Sarah dropped]
Regina Belmont: What are you guys doing?
Sarah: They said if we breathe this, we can go to the North Pole to see Santa Clause.
Regina Belmont: That's so sick!
Samantha Belmont: [Samantha appears out of nowhere] Hey!
[Regina turns and fires at the voice, Samantha narrowly ducks and avoids the shot]
Samantha Belmont: Holy shit!
Regina Belmont: Sam?
Samantha Belmont: [with her hands up] I give, I give.
Regina Belmont: They said you were dead!
Samantha Belmont: [with a triumphant smile] They were exaggerating totally.
Regina Belmont: [running to Hector's car] Come on kids!
Hector Gomez: Who are the kids?
Brian: I'm Brian!
Sarah: I'm Sarah!
Regina Belmont: Yeah, and I'm aunt Reg, and that's aunt Sam, and that's uncle Hector.
Sarah: Can I have my bunny?
Regina Belmont: In a minute! Beat feet uncle Hector.
Hector Gomez: Uncle Hector?
Sarah: Hey, it's MY bunny you know.
[on seeing Vinnie and Mary/Jenny]
Sarah: What a perfect pair... a dick and a cunt.
Oren Little: Wanna watch some TV?
Oren Little: I don't watch animation, MTV, BRAVO, Oprah, reruns or sitcoms. What do you wanna watch?
Sarah: Can we watch "Duck Dynasty"?
Oren Little: What station is it on?
Sarah: You're very angry, aren't you? Don't be. You're still God's gift. Every day God gives us is a gift. That's why we call it the present.
Ben: Fuck off, Sarah.
Ginger: It's just a little weed. Well, maybe not such a little. How 'bout, six trash bags full?
Sarah: Six bags full? Like that?
Ducky: Don't be mad, be glad.
Sarah: Ginger! There's a guy and a girl in the bathroom together.
Sarah: And they're doing it!
Ginger: How do you know?
Sarah: I saw them.
Ginger: Well, maybe they're washing each others' backs.
Sarah: Ginger, I'm not stupid.
Ginger: No, but you are uptight. You'll get over it.
Sarah: Next fall, I start UCLA, pre-law. Then, a couple years of law school, maybe join up with a good firm for a couple of years, specialize, and...
Scott Daniels: Oh, whoa, what is that, eight, ten years there? What if you get that far and find out you don't like being a lawyer?
Sarah: I don't plan to not like being a lawyer.
Scott Daniels: You're programming yourself just like a computer.
Sarah: Well, what's wrong with that?
Scott Daniels: Nothing, if you happen to be a computer. You're a real, live human being.
Scott Daniels: So follow your impulses once in awhile. Be human.
Devin: Hi! I'm sorry I'm dropping by like this, I just really had to explain those text messages.
Sarah: How do you know where I live?
Devin: You said you live behind the Mexican restaurant on La Brea.
Sarah: How'd you know which house?
Devin: I knocked on like three doors before yours, but listen, that's not the point.
Sarah: Are you giving me face ?
Andrew: I was just sitting here trying to work out *exactly* how I ruined my life.
Sarah: You think you're in trouble? I just tried to fuck a six-year-old.
Andrew: [laughs] You know, it's like - kindergarten, school, university, Black Hole.
Sarah: It's not that bad.
Andrew: Oh, yes, it is. In fact, it's SLIGHTLY worse than that.
Sarah: We can't all have our lives figured out as well as you do.
Andrew: I didn't say I had my life figured out, I said I had YOUR life figured out, love.
Sarah: It could have been worse.
Andrew: Yes, Sarah. It could have been worse. They could have attached electrodes to our genitals.
Sarah: I'm disappointed in you. You used to be so romantic.
Andrew: Yeah, well now I'm rheumatic.
Sarah: You'll probably be stuck with that Joan Collins impersonator for the rest of your life!
Andrew: You're talking about the woman I almost love.
Sarah: God, I've never seen anyone wear more makeup! How does she take it off? With a chisel?
[Carol, Maggie, Peter and Andrew are listening to the squeaking from upstairs, which they presume is Sarah and Brian, when Sarah arrives in the kitchen]
Sarah: Hi, guys.
[the others turn to face Sarah]
Peter: Now, that's what I call an extremely long dick.
Andrew: Well, if it isn't Sarah, is it us?
Maggie: It can only be Roger and Mary!
Peter: I assume they must have resolved their differences last night.
Andrew: [telephone rings] This is the acid test
[Squeaking stops for a few seconds, before resuming]
Peter: Well, if you'll excuse me, I better go!
Andrew: It's New Year's fucking Eve! Even the pope has a drink on New Year's Eve.
Sarah: The pope doesn't get unpleasant.
Andrew: Am I unpleasant anyone?
Sarah: [Sarah is telling Peter about catching Maggie with Paul] There they are, in bed, together!
Peter: With Maggie on top?
Sarah: Like she was in a rodeo!
Nicole: That's when you need to say, "Buddy boy, it's time to shit or get off the pot."
Sarah: And I would be the "shit" part of that analogy?
James: It didn't start out this way. We used to... talk, like really talk, all the time about things that mattered to us. I was understanding and she was understanding and it was... it was fucking great. And I know we can get there again, I just never been in a relationship like that before. It just felt so good, you know? Just after a while, all this... all the shit gets built up and it just gets in the way. We... we can't get through it. It's like this big wall of shit. And, you know, we... we try to be straight up with each other, or... or easy going, but every little thing we do just gets caught.
Sarah: In the shit.
James: Yeah. We're caught in shit.
Sarah: Well, if you figure out how to get rid of it, let me know.
Sarah: Are you trying to bribe me with laundry detergent?
Sarah: Did you cheat on her?
James: No. No. Not this time. Look, you know, that sounded so much worse than it actually is, I swear.
Sarah: I feel like you're losing your edge.
Steven Phillips: Jesus! I am hearing this from everybody!
Sarah: That's because it's true.
Sarah: Honey, all the gods drink!
Hudson: What are you looking for in love?
Sarah: I want to know that if my limbs fall off we'd still be together no matter what. And when he says my name it sounds different in his mouth. You know? Like it's safe there. Or, I put on perfume and he puts on cologne and we go out and we can smell each other. Or that he can make me smile when I'm tired. Thats a big one. That when you tell them something that you're scared to tell them because you're afraid they'll stop loving you. But when you tell them, it actually makes them love you more. You tell them that you like their shirt and they end up wearing it everyday. The greatest example of this is my grandparents. My grandmother has arthritis in her hands and she can't bend down to paint her toes so my grandfather does it for her all the time. Even though he has arthritis in his hands too.
Sarah: God, hi.
Hudson: How are you?
Sarah: I'm good.
Sarah: How.. how are you?
Hudson: I'm good
Hudson: I'm better. I mean I'm not ever gunna be normal. I'm still gunna be much more comfortable at 4:45 at the corner of Ensure and Woodman.
Hudson: Hey look, I don't wanna hold you up, I just wanted to let you know that if you lost all your limbs, we'd still be together forever. I mean I really hope that doesn't happen because I think your limbs are pretty great. And when I said your name, it would always sound safe. I'm not sure about the perfume and the cologne thing but I could try, ya know, I mean I could pick some up. I would always try to make you smile when you're tired. I know you think that's pretty hard to do but I could do that. And you would never have to be scared to tell me anything. And if you like this shirt, I wouldn't take it off for a month. And I would be more than willing to paint your grandmothers toenails so your grandfather doesn't have to do it anymore. You don't have to save me Sara. But I am going to love you for the rest of my life, so things would be a lot better for me if you were around.
Hudson: Should I come in?
Sarah: Oh, I would.
Hudson: You're insanely cute.
Sarah: You think I'm cute? . . . I kind of think I have a big head.
Sarah: I wanna know that if my limbs fall off we'd still be together no matter what.
Hudson: People always look at the numbers changing.
Hudson: I think it's 'cause they're nervous.
Sarah: You do realize we haven't had sex yet.
Hudson: Yes, I am aware of that.
Gun Expert: Y'know guns are what made this country great. Don't you agree?
Sarah: [noncomittal shrug]
Gun Expert: C'mon. Feel one.
Sarah: Well... I'd rather not; I don't believe in guns.
Gun Expert: Well ya know, you don't know what it's like until you... you touch the love shaft of Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson.
Sarah: Actually, being a girl, it's all right for me not to be into guns.
Gun Expert: Whatdya mean, "being a girl"? That's all the more reason ya need one - all these crazies in the streets! You wanna be raped?
Sarah: [instantly shakes head rapidly]
Gun Expert: No. Then you carry a gun.
Sarah: I need ta... grab 'em in the first minute.
Kelly: War is hell.
Sarah: Oh, well then, why do you do it?
Kelly: You're never more alive than when faced with simulated death.
Sarah: Cigarettes are bad!
Darly: No Sarah, cigarettes are good, and when you grow up, you should smoke... mmm, cigarettes.
Danny: I thought you loved me.
Sarah: Really, what made you think that?
Danny: Probably when you said you loved me.
Sarah: And if his wife got hit by a car tomorrow, I'd probably start sleeping with him again.
Sarah: Do you realize that everything that you're saying is what they say the Antichrist would say?
Joey: You're kidding.
Sarah: No, it's true. They say the Antichrist will be a very rational person who will convince people not to believe in God but to believe in themselves, science, and rational thought.
Melvin: Oh, you're totally the Antichrist.
Sarah: Whaddya want me to say, that it's okay that Brendan's gay? I'm sorry but I'm not having a politically correct nervous breakdown.
Sarah: Where to now?
Bob: Oohh, Friday night Trax.
Sarah: Aw, no...
Eric: Bob, Sarah's, like, totally fag bashing.
Sarah: I'm so not fag bashing. Every time we went in college, I was the only woman.
Bob: No, Trax is mixed on Friday nights.
Sarah: Yea, gays AND lesbians.
Beth: Lesbians? Oooh, let's away...
Sterling Scott: [after Bob's and Brendan's night together is revealed] Bob?
Aunt Alice: Brendan?
[Sterling and Sarah faint]
Sarah: Father of Boris...? Do you want to get together again some time?
Dennis: Best if we don't.
Sarah: I remember we had a really good time.
Dennis: I remember I was married...
Meg: [on loudspeaker] Get out of my house!
Sarah: Say fuck!
Meg: [on loud speaker] FUCK!
Sarah: Mom! "Get the fuck out of my house"!
Meg: [on loudspeaker] Get the FUCK out of my house!
Meg: [Meg gives a goodnight kiss to Sarah] It's disgusting how much I love you.
Sarah: Tell me about it.
Sarah: [observing the Panic Room, with cameras and a steel door] My room! definitely my room!
Meg: Is that Morse Code?
Sarah: No, SOS.
Meg: Where did you learn that?
Meg: He'll do something.
Sarah: No he won't.
Meg: He'll call the police.
Sarah: You don't know her, mom. She won't let him.
Meg: No, he knows there is trouble. He heard me. He's right across the park. That's why we got houses so close to each other. Just in case we needed each other. He'll help us!
Sarah: He won't.
Meg: [yells] Yes he will!
Meg: I'm sorry.
Sarah: No, I'm sorry. I was trying not to tell you.
Sarah: I'm dizzy and hungry.
Raoul: [to Sarah] Don't you look at me.
Burnham: Hey, all I know about this is what I've seen on TV. You gotta talk me through this.
[fills syringe with insulin]
Burnham: Nice house you guys got. Mom's rich?
Sarah: Dad's rich. Mom's just mad.
Burnham: Like this?
Sarah: Tap it.
Burnham: I wish I could put my kid in a place like this. Not that I didn't try. Just sometimes things they don't work out the way you want them to. Wasn't supposed to be like this. You weren't supposed to be here.
Burnham: Wasn't supposed to be like this.
Sarah: Are you okay?
Sarah: Small space?
Meg: I'm okay.
Sarah: You can't wig out.
Meg: I know.
Sarah: I mean it.
Meg: I won't.
Sarah: You know, people never get buried alive anymore. I guess it used to happen all the time.
Sarah: Yeah, I read that.
Meg: And when did this happen all the time?
Sarah: 20, 30 years ago.
Meg: What are they doing now?
Sarah: I don't know.
Burnham: Do you need this?
[Sarah nods yes]
Burnham: Can you do it yourself?
[Sarah nods no]
Burnham: What happens if you don't get it?
Sarah: [weak whispering] Coma. Die.
Meg: Hey. Enough. Mind the pizza?
Sarah: What do you mean?
Meg: Our first night. I should've thought of something special.
Sarah: I like pizza.
Sarah: Fuck him.
Sarah: Fuck her, too.
Meg: I agree. But don't.
[after Meg set the propane gas on fire scene]
Meg: [to Sarah] Are you okay?
Meg: [scolding] Promise me you will never do *ANYTHING* like that.
Sarah: [nods] I won't.
Meg: [Sarah is riding her scooter alongside her mother] Sarah, do you have to ride that here?
Sarah: Mom, we're in the street.
Sarah: [Meg and Sarah are in the elevator trying to escape] What's going on?
Meg: People. In the house.
Meg: If we stay calm everything will be fine, okay? Just stay calm.
Sarah: You're making me nervous.
Meg: I'm sorry.
Sarah: What is it?
Meg: It's bad!
[Meg grabs a lighter as the panic room beings to fill up with gas]
Sarah: Just a sec
Sarah: Get under this
[Meg throws a fire blanket to Sarah]
Meg: OH MY GOD
[Jenny talks to her friend Sarah at the park about Carter]
Sarah: Now, I hate to bring this up, but you are married to the perfect man.
Jenny: The perfect man? Yesterday, out of the blue, he started to make love to me... and then stopped when Amy started to cry.
Sarah: Well, just because he was worried about Amy...
Jenny: He wasn't worried about Amy, because he didn't even go to her room. He went downstairs, got into his car and drove off.
Sarah: Well, that doesn't make any sense.
Jenny: Carter isn't making any sense. And he's becoming awfully compulsive with Amy. He doesn't just take care of her, he studies her. I have this horrible feeling it has something to do with his father.
[Jenny talks to Sarah at the park, who recommends she be ready for Carter returning back]
Sarah: Well, just in case he shows up, I'd be packing a .45.
Jenny: Well, Jack's staying with me now. So...
Sarah: Better than a .45.
Nicholas: [explaining why he's on the lam] I lay with a woman of my parish, another man's wife.
Sarah: [about priesthood] I thought that came with the job.
Jasper: Jeez, I don't think I've gotten 500 messages my entire life!
Sarah: That's because you don't have boobs Jasper.
Sarah: Alfred, I can't live like this!
Alfred Borden: Well, what do you want from me?
Sarah: I want... I want you to be honest with me. No tricks, no lies, no secrets.
Sarah: Do you... do you love me?
Alfred Borden: Not today. No.
Alfred Borden: Everything's going to be alright, because I love you very much.
Sarah: Say it again.
Alfred Borden: I love you.
Sarah: Not today.
Alfred Borden: What do you mean?
Sarah: Well some days it's not true. Maybe today you're more in love with magic. I like being able to tell the difference, it makes the days it is true mean something.
Alfred Borden: I love you.
Sarah: You mean it today.
Alfred Borden: Of course.
Sarah: It just makes it so much harder when you don't.
Sarah: No more lies. No more secrets.
Alfred Borden: Secrets are my life.
Sarah: I know what you really are. And Alfred, I can't live like this.
Alfred Borden: Oh, you think I can live like this? You think I bloody enjoy living like this? We have a beautiful house, lovely little girl, we're married, what is so wrong with your life?
Alfred Borden: He's a sharp lad, your son.
Sarah: He's my nephew.
Alfred Borden: Oh.
Sarah: I know what you really are, and Alfred, I can't live like this.
Alfred Borden: Oh, you think I can live like this? You think I bloody enjoy living like this? We have a beautiful house, lovely little girl, we're married, what is *so* wrong with your life?
Sarah: Alfred I can't live like *this*!
Alfred Borden: Well, what do you want from me?
Sarah: I want - I want you to be, honest with me. No tricks, no lies, no secrets.
Sarah: Do you - do you love me?
Alfred Borden: Not today. No.
Bonnie: We were just wondering; do you still have any powers?
Rochelle: 'Cause we don't.
[Bonnie shots her a look]
Sarah: So, if you ever just want to hang out and chant or call the corners...
Sarah: [scathing] Maybe. Hold your breath until I call.
Rochelle: [as she and Bonnie start walking away] She probably doesn't have any powers anyway.
Sarah: [Turns around with a look of concentration. Wind blows, clouds cover the sky. Lightening flashes; a bolt hitting a tree branch which falls close to Bonnie and Rochelle. They stumble to the ground to avoid it, and the sky returns to normal. Sarah stares at them with a hard expression] Be careful. You don't want to end up like Nancy.
Nancy: What's going on? Why aren't you dead?
Sarah: Manon. He came to me. Saved me. Oh, and by the way. He wanted me to give you a message. You're in big shit. He says you've abused the gifts that he's given you, and now you're going to have to pay the price.
Nancy: [her fingers turn to snakes] What's going on?
Sarah: Where did Bonnie and Rochelle go? They just ran out of here without even saying good-bye. That's bad manners.
Chris: [handing sarah a flower] I wanna apologize for those guys in French. They're assholes.
Sarah: [droping the flower] Yeah well, you know what they say. You are who you hang with.
Chris: Yeah right... wait, did you just call me an asshole?
Sarah: [chuckels] Sorry, my defenses are up. People here have been really rude to me.
Sarah: By the power of three times three, make them see, make them see.
Nancy: I drink of my sisters, and I take into myself... all the power of Manon.
Sarah: That's all?
Sarah: Did you tell your friends?
Sarah: That you're a lying sack of shit.
Chris: No... b-but I will!
Nancy: [Performing the spell to evoke the spirit; calling the corners] Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the East, the powers of air and invention. Hear me! Us! Hear us!
Bonnie: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the South, the powers of fire and feeling. Hear us.
Rochelle: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the West, powers of water and intuition. Hear us.
Sarah: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the North, by the powers of mother and earth. Hear us.
Nancy: Aid us in our magical workings on this May's eve.
Nancy: [Continues with a new chant] Serpent of old, ruler of the deep. Guardian of the bitter sea. Show us your glory. Show us your power! We pray of thee, we pray of thee. We invoke thee.
Rochelle: You guys, maybe he'll really listen to us now.
Sarah: What's that? That's like God?
Bonnie: No. Man invented God. This is much older then that.
Sarah: Do you guys worship the devil?
[the other three girls laugh at Sarah]
Nancy: No. It's like God and the Devil. I mean, it's everything. It's the trees, it's the ground, it's the rocks, it's the moon... it's everything.
Sarah: It's nature.
Nancy: If God and the Devil were playing football, Manon would be the stadium that they played on. It would be the sun that shone down on them.
Nancy: What's wrong with your scars, Sarah?
[Nancy slashes at Sarah's wrists with her dagger]
Sarah: It isn't real.
Nancy: Then why are you still bleeding? Run! Run to your up room like a little coward you are. She's so pathetic!
Laura Lizzie: Ow! You pulled my hair out!
Sarah: Sorry, I thought I saw a bug. They have shampoo for that, you know.
Laura Lizzie: Stupid bitch.
Sarah: What's wrong with her?
Rochelle: Her spell's not working.
Bonnie: What spell?
Rochelle: I don't know. She doesn't want to be white trash anymore. I told her, "You're white honey! Just get over it."
Nancy: Have you ever heard of invoking the spirit? It's when you call him... Manon. It's like... it's like you take him into you. It's like he fills you. He takes everything that's gone wrong in your life and makes it all better again.
Sarah: Nothing makes everything all better again.
Nancy: Maybe not for you...
Sarah: Relax... it's only magic. Now who's pathetic?
Chris: Sarah, come on, I mean... you look like you need to talk to somebody anyway.
Sarah: How do you know what I look like? We're talking on the phone.
Lirio: You know how to use candles?
Sarah: Yeah, you light the wick.
Lirio: [Smiles] More than that.
Nancy: He comes on to anything with tits, Sarah.
Bonnie: Except me.
Sarah: I'm not watching him.
Nancy: He spreads disease.
Nancy: I speak from personal experience.
[after yelling at Chris]
Nancy: HE'S A JERK!
Nancy: So hot-stuff how did it go?
Sarah: How did what go?
Nancy: Your date with Chris.
Rochelle: Chris already told everybody.
Sarah: [confused] Told everybody what?
Bonnie: That you guys "did it".
Sarah: But we didn't... do it.
Nancy: Well then he was just trying to save-face because he's going around the whole school saying that you were the "lousiest lay he's EVER had" and coming from him that's pretty bad.
Sarah: [looking over to the other girls in the classroom who were giggling] UH UH.
[hoping it wasn't true]
Rochelle: He said the same stuff about Nancy.
Nancy: Told you he was a jerk.
Nancy: [noticing Sarah's cuts] What's up with that?
Sarah: [embarrassed] I slit my wrists.
Bonnie: What you'd do it with?
Sarah: A-a kitchen knife.
Bonnie: [surprised] You even did it the right way.
Nancy: [reassuring her] PUNK ROCK! Let's go.
Rochelle: The right way? How do you know the right way?
Bonnie: [defensive] Shut up Rochelle.
Rochelle: Well how do you know?
Sarah: [Braiding a strand of Laura's hair into Rochelle's] Laura really has split ends.
Sarah: I guess this confirms she's not a natural blonde.
[tone becomes contemplative]
Rochelle: What do you think will happen to Laura?
Sarah: I don't know. If she leaves you alone, nothing will happen to her. Nothing good.
Bonnie: [to an attractive passer-by] Hi!
[he continues walking]
Bonnie: Don't be shy honey. Nice ass!
Bonnie: What? He has a cute butt.
Sarah: You're a slut.
Rochelle: Maybe you should ask him out.
Sarah: You know it.
Bonnie: [laughs] Yeah, "Hey, I like your butt. Do you want to have dinner?"
Sarah: [Talking to Chris about Bonnie, Rochelle and Nancy] When I started hanging out with them I was almost relieved... I didn't have many close friends in San Francisco. It just felt really nice to belong.
[shakes her head]
Sarah: I disagreed with them once and they turned their backs on me. That's not friendship.
Lirio: Sarah, you have a tremendous light inside you... more so than any witch I've ever known. You must not be afraid.
Sarah: [Scared] I can't control it. I always end up hurting someone.
Lirio: [reaches down, touches the ring on Sarah's finger] Do you hear the voice of your mother?
Sarah: What about her?
Lirio: She's telling you to be strong. She was a witch too, of course. Didn't you know?
Sarah: [Shakes head] No.
Sarah: [Taps Nancy on the shoulder and steps out of a full length mirror] Oh, did I frighten you? I'm sorry.
Sarah: [about Mannon] He wanted me to give you a message: you're in deep shit. He says you've abused what he's given you and now you have to pay the price.
Nancy: [trying to hide her fear] Did he?
Sarah: [Unwavering] He did.
Bonnie: So does stuff like tonight happen to you a lot?
Sarah: No. Not like that.
Sarah: Other... stuff.
Rochelle: Where did you learn it?
Sarah: I don't know.
Bonnie: [Nods] A natural witch.
Sarah: [about her supposed "power"] I hate it; it's always getting screwed up. It's like... sometimes I'll... I'll want it to rain, and a pipe will burst in my bedroom, and it'll just get *flooded*
Nancy: [Bonnie and Rochelle laugh with glee, Nancy looks skeptical] Yeah right.
Sarah: No, really! Or I'll want it just to be quiet and I'll wish for it and wish for it, and I'll go deaf for three days straight.
[Bonnie and Rochelle stare in awe, Nancy looks begrudgingly convinced]
Sarah: [Teaching the game "light as a feather; stiff as a board] You take your index finger and your middle finger and put it under her like this
[Nancy, Sarah, and Bonnie all put their two fingers under Rochelle]
Sarah: [Continuing] Now you have to imagine that she's incredibly light; like she's made of air.
Bonnie: Is that her whole body or just her head?
Sarah: Guys, concentrate or it's not gonna work.
Nancy: [everyone is silent briefly, until Nancy laughs] I think I sprained my finger.
Rochelle: Shut up!
Sarah: [Trying not to smile] Guys, focus! Ready?
Nancy, Sarah, Bonnie: [they start chanting] Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather, stiff as a board
[They keep chanting until Rochelle is raised over two feet in the air]
Sarah: [opens her eyes] Holy shit.
[Bonnie and Nancy stare, speechless]
Rochelle: [Eyes closed] You guys, it's not working.
[opens her eyes and sees she's suspended in mid air]
Sarah: Shut up or you're gonna fall!
Rochelle: How do I get down? Whose got the instructions?
Sarah: Just concentrate.
[All are quiet until Bonnie's mom knocks on the door, entering the room just as Rochelle drops to the floor]
Rochelle: Ow! My butt!
Nancy: [Driving] Can you guys tell me what color that light is?
Sarah: It's red.
Nancy: [keeps driving, puts on a faux confused voice] Doesn't red mean stop?
Bonnie: [Playfully] Yeah, red means stop.
[Nancy continues driving, the red light turns green just as they reach it]
Sarah: [concerned] It's like what Lirio was talking about; throwing things out of balance. I know you guys think we're getting what we want now, but it's going to come back to us, threefold.
Bonnie: [Mockingly] Ohh!
Nancy: Are we actually having a theological conversation here. I mean it's fun, it's scary. I mean, who gives a shit?
[Bonnie and Rochelle giggle in the backseat]
Sarah: [Turning to them] What do you guys think?
Nancy: [dismissively] They don't think
Rochelle: [mock offended] Bitch!
[Bonnie continues to giggle]
Nancy: [Turns to Sarah] And stop trying to win them over, because it won't work.
Rochelle: [Slightly annoyed] I'm not trying to win them over, you're paranoid.
Nancy: [Angry] I'm paranoid? I'm not paranoid!
[Bonnie and Rochelle start repeating the word "paranoid", contiguously laughing historically]
Nancy: Will you guys shut up!
Nancy: You want in or do you want to leave this circle? Just tell me right now.
Sarah: [Raising her voice slightly] Why does it always have to be that way with you Nancy?
Nancy: [Very angry] Because that's the way it is!
Sarah: [Sarah's tone calms down, but remains firm] All I'm saying is, I think you should *think*.
Sarah: Add I don't want out.
[Takes on a warning tone]
Sarah: One of these times, the light's not gonna be green, Nancy.
Rochelle: [tentative] Sarah?
Bonnie: [also tentative, but slightly more confident] Hi Sarah, how are you?
Sarah: [Slightly scornful] Good, then again I can sleep at night so... how are *you*.
Rochelle: We... want to apologize. We feel really bad about...
Sarah: [Cuts her off] Trying to kill me?
Bonnie: [about running away when the snake man is hit by a car] The car hit him, and we made it happen!
Nancy: [diplomatic] Maybe, maybe not.
Bonnie: [Excited] Definitely! I thought to myself, "it's going to hit him".
Rochelle: [also excited] I thought it too!
Nancy: Well, I did too...
Bonnie: Sarah, did you think it?
Sarah: [Slightly apprehensive] Yeah.
Bonnie: Then that's it, Sarah's the forth! North, South, East, and West; we can make things happen! This is it, this is real.
Nancy: [Finally starting to share the excitement] Shit.
Sarah: [Performing a glamor spell] This is to feel/This is to be/Shape and form it/For all to see
[moves her hands to cover her eyes]
Sarah: By the power of three times three/As I will it/So shall it be!
[Uncovers her eyes in a ta-da move]
Rochelle: [Nancy, Bonnie and Rochelle look around, confused] What?
Sarah: My eyes are brown.
[they move in closer to look]
Bonnie: [unimpressed] Oh.
Sarah: [explaining] They're usually green.
Bonnie: [Still lackluster] Oh.
Nancy: [sounding unimpressed to the point of annoyance] You can do that with contacts.
Bonnie: [Reassuringly] Yeah, but it's good. I mean, it suits you.
Rochelle: [lackluster] Subtle.
Rochelle: but good!
Sarah: You want something bigger?
Nancy: [Now excited] I want bigger!
Chris: Why didn't you answer the phone?
Sarah: It's three in the morning Chris.
Chris: Oh. Yeah, I guess that's a good reason... hey, you know, I was thinking we should move in together.
Sarah: I don't think I'm ready for that level of commitment.
Chris: Oh. Sarah, I can't stop thinking about you. I can't eat, I can't sleep. I think I love you. I've never loved anyone before... well, except for my mom and this little puppy I had when I was little...
Sarah: Hey, Chris. Fuck you!
Mitt: But I will.
[looks to Trey as Sarah runs off, upset]
Mitt: She's gonna cry, then I'm gonna cry, and we're all gonna cry!
Lirio: Are you going to pay for those?
Lirio: You're not like your friends.
Sarah: [Of witchcraft] You guy's are really into all this?
Bonnie: [dismissively] Sort of.
Sarah: You know I've never read anything about this stuff before. I mean, I don't follow it.
Lirio: Maybe you are a natural witch. Your power comes from within.
Chris: [seems to lose confidence] Nevermind.
Bonnie: [referring to Sara's spell] It's working!
Sarah: That or he's gone completely crazy.
Sarah: I need help to undo a love spell.
Lirio: [Matter-of-fact] When you open a flood gate, how can you undo it? You unleash something with a spell. There is no undoing; it must run it's course.
Nancy: You should let him suffer.
Lirio: It's not for you to judge suffering.
Chris: Yeah, you know sometimes it's like we're one person. Know what I mean?
Sarah: [confused] No, I'm not sure.
Chris: [laughs] I'm not sure either! That's so funny, I was just thinking "I have no idea what I'm talking about".
Lirio: You can defeat those who challenge you, but you must surrender yourself to the higher power.
Lirio: You must invoke the spirit.
Sarah: [protesting] But it made Nancy crazy.
Lirio: She takes it to a dark place.
Lirio: Don't be afraid.
Mr. Bailey: You can wait, i mean until you get a school uniform. You don't have to go now.
Sarah: I can't stay home and watch daytime television for the rest of my life.
Mr. Bailey: Why not? I could.
Wes: It seems that a lot of people are pointing the finger in your direction lately.
Ren: And what have they said?
Wes: What I have been telling you about the trouble and the drugs and... It just seems like you've had a lot of problems since you moved here. And I figured...
Ren: You figured where there's smoke there's fire, right?
Wes: Usually works like that. Now look Ren, you know that I would never try to take the place of your father.
Ren: Yeah well, there's no chance of that!
[Gets up and leaves the house]
Sarah: [Running over to the window] Uh oh, he's taking the car.
Sarah: I know what you're doing.
Sarah: You're trying to save him.
Elissa: I am not.
Sarah: Yes, you are. That's what you do, you like to fix people.
Elissa: Oh, yaddayadda-yadda.
Sarah: Honey, sometimes people can't be fixed.
Sarah: I just have one rule that I need you to respect. I do not want the two of you to be alone in your house or this house if I am not here.
Elissa: You are *never* here.
[as Marcy May introduces a new 'recruit' to their home and shows her one of the babies]
Sarah: All the kids here are boys.
Martha: [referring to Patrick] He only has boys.
Sarah: I will do whatever it takes for this role.
Allie: Just don't drink anymore.
Sarah: It's not that easy.
Allie: Try middle school.
Immigration Officer #1: How many children do you have?
Immigration Officer #1: Says three here.
Johnny: We lost one.
Immigration Officer #1: What's your name little girl?
Immigration Officer #1: [to Christy] And who are you?
Sarah: She's Christy.
Immigration Officer #1: What age are you Christy?
Ariel: She's ten.
Immigration Officer #1: Welcome to America.
Sarah: Make believe you're happy Johnny, please, for the kids.
Sarah: If the baby dies, just don't wake me up.
Johnny: Why would youse wanna be the same as everybody else?
Ariel: 'Cause everybody else goes trick-or-treating.
Sarah: What's that?
Ariel: It's what they do here for Halloween.
Johnny: What do you mean? Like, help the Halloween party?
Christy: No. Not help the Halloween party. You don't ask for help in America. You demand it. Trick-or-treat- you don't ask, you threaten.
Sarah: You can't do that on our street.
Christy: Why not?
Sarah: Because you can't threaten drug addicts and transvestites, that's why.
Ariel: It's alright, Dad. Mam's breathing's okay.
Johnny: [trying to fix the air conditioner, it's a boiling summer day] Is it okay, Sarah?
Sarah: [smiles reassuringly at Johnny, fanning herself]
Ariel: It's the lemon drops; they're magic! You take one and you forget about your breathing.
Sarah: [opens her mouth to show the lemon drop, grinning]
Johnny: Do you want me to lie?
Sarah: You're the only actor in the world who can't lie, Johnny. Even for the sake of your kids.
Johnny: What does that mean?
Sarah: If you can't touch somebody you created, how can you create somebody that'll touch anybody?
Johnny: What are you going on about?
Sarah: Acting, Johnny. And bringing something to life, it's the same thing. That's why you can't get a job acting, Johnny, because you can't feel anything.
Johnny: This baby's not Frankie, Sarah.
Sarah: Anyways, it's just a dick.
Sarah: So... who you fuckin?
James: Come on, I don't kiss and tell.
Sarah: But, do you fuck and tell?
James: Or that.
Sarah: Love doesn't end, just because we don't see each other.
Maurice Bendrix: Doesn't it?
Sarah: People go on loving God, don't they? All their lives. Without seeing him.
Maurice Bendrix: That's not my kind of love.
Sarah: Maybe there is no other kind.
Sarah: You see I never stopped loving you, even though I couldn't see you.
Sarah: I had tempted fate, and fate had accepted.
Sarah: I've only made two promises in my life. One was to marry Henry, the other is to stop seeing you. And I'm too weak to keep either.
Sarah: Are you on a new book?
Maurice Bendrix: Of course.
Sarah: It's not about us, is it? The one you threatened to write?
Maurice Bendrix: A book takes a year to write. It's too hard work for revenge.
Sarah: If only you knew how little you had to revenge.
Maurice Bendrix: I'm joking. We are adults. We knew it had to end some time. Now we can have lunch and talk about your husband.
Sarah: Tell Him I'm sorry. I'm too human. Too weak. Tell Him I can't keep my promises. I'm tired of being without you.
Sarah: [refering to Harley] That man is the devil! He will take you to hell with him!
Judith: Well, at least I'll enjoy the ride!
Sarah: You're a dick.
Josh: Yeah. All men are dicks, Sarah. We're hardwired that way.
Sarah: Yeah, but you're a dick who thinks he's better than a dick because he can back up his dickish behavior with psychobabble and pseudoscience.
[Watching Kate arrive with Isaac]
Sarah: Oh, she's hot.
Alex: Your boobs are bigger.
Sarah: That's not true! That's not true!
Josh: The Japanese are the most wacked-out people on earth.
Sarah: Oh my God, you're like an 8 year-old racist.
Josh: An 8 year-old racist... Look, you cram that many people on an island, it's like a throbbing inbred hothouse of cultural miasma. Frankly, I'm surprised they don't have more fetishes.
Josh: [posing for group picture] Alright, posture everyone.
Kate: [holding the camera] Uh, I'm going to need you to get a lot closer together than that.
Ben: Come on, come on.
[arm around Alex]
Josh: Alright. I'm going to pose a quick idea, you guys. Maybe next time we do this, it's a happy occasion.
Alex: Is there going to be a next time?
Isaac: Uh oh.
Kate: Okay. One, two...
Isaac: So, what are we making, Sarah?
Sarah: We are making chilled watermelon soup and sea scallop risotto.
Josh: What? What are we making again?
Sarah: I'm sorry, can you do something helpful?
Josh: Did you say risotto?
Sarah: Can you please do something helpful?
Josh: The joint is not going to roll itself, Sarah. And I am making a magical appetizer dish that is going to make your risotto taste so much better.
Sarah: You know what i want? I want you to have acted like my boyfriend seven years ago. taken me to a movie, bought me a fucking ice cream cone. That's what i want. Instead of being the guy who permanently fucked up my expectations for normalcy in a relationship. the guy that made me explain to my mom "No, Josh isn't my boyfriend, he's just someone that sleeps with me when he comes home pining for my best friend to drunk to see straight."
Night Editor: [entering] Ben. Your page's set?
Ben: Mm, yep. Almost.
[looking at picture]
Ben: Jesus, Alex.
[answering the phone]
Ben: Hello? Yes, this is him, but I'm at work. So...
Josh: [now answering his phone] Used to have a freshman roommate named "Ben", but that ass-wad hasn't called me in ages. What?
Sarah: [on her phone] And no one was there? He was... Alone? Yeah, of course he was alone. That was stupid. Yeah, I can probably get up in a couple hours. I just need a little bit of time to get out of here.
[more work gets set on her desk]
Isaac: [walking while on his phone] Well, he's gonna be okay. That's the most important thing. Okay.
[checking incoming call]
Isaac: I gotta take this. Hang on a sec... Babe? Yeah, I'm fine. Just got to the office - I'm gonna leave from there.
Josh: Enough with the fucking pictures.
Sarah: I'm sorry, I'm recording this for posterity. Is that okay?
Josh: By what? By ruining it in the present?
Sarah: No, that's your job.
Alex: I guess I was mainly just scared.
Sarah: Of what?
Alex: Of you all. The possibility that you didn't like me.
Sarah: That's ridiculous.
Alex: It's the truth. I remember that that feeling did not go away. Until, um, until junior year when Ben had me at his parents' place for Easter. We took the train there and back. Barely talked, but you know, it was, it was better than talking. It was just... Just nice.
Sarah: So, we are all doomed, romantically speaking.
Alex: Only on like a deep karmic level.
Josh: For whatever reason, I'm strangely okay with that.
Sarah: Maybe we should make one of those pacts where if we're still single when we're 35, we all just get married.
Alex: Who, the *three* of us?
Sarah: Yes, and Timmy of course.
[indicating the dog]
Sarah: We'll make a great dysfunctional family. How's that sound Timmy?
Josh: I'd consider it.
Sarah: [about Coalhouse] He say one thing, and then he say another thing. And he make it all sound so good. It ain't nuthin' but talk, Ma'am. It ain't nuthin' but talk!
Sarah: Come on, don't be shy!
Sarah: Get the fuck outta here you possessed piece of shit!
Older Jeremiah: [after being caught by Sarah, eating food in a dumpster she says was poison] But... but I don't wanna die.
Sarah: You ate poison! You ate poison!
Older Jeremiah: If I die, who will watch the walls?
Sarah: You think I need you? You've done nothing but ruin everything for me. I was fine on my own until you came along. I sacrificed everything for you.
Young Jeremiah: [getting into the car after picking Jeremiah from the police station, Sarah lites up a cigarette] It's bad you smoke, my momma always says so
Sarah: Is that what she said?
[puts the cigarette out]
[blows smoke in Jeremiah's face]
Sarah: We gotta do something with your nose. Somebody fucked their slave and you've got the nose to prove it.
Older Jeremiah: Fix it please.
Sarah: [puts foundation on Jeremiah] Camoflauge it. See? I learned that in beauty school. One day I'll go back. I'll get a shot with the stars in Hollywood.
Older Jeremiah: Take me.
Sarah: Hold still. Alright, close your eyes.
[puts eyeshadow on Jeremiah]
Sarah: Look left... look right... blink... look at me.
Older Jeremiah: Can I come to Hollywood with you?
Sarah: [starts putting lipstick on Jeremiah]
Older Jeremiah: Can I come to Hollywood...?
Sarah: Hold still. You're making me late for work. I wanna leave before Jackson gets back.
[points to the mirror]
Older Jeremiah: [stares at himself in the mirror] I'm pretty.
Sarah: What did I tell you? You were meant to be a girl.
Older Jeremiah: I know.
Sarah: [starts curling Jeremiah's hair, while Jeremiah starts messing with his lipstick] Stop doing that! Don't mess my lips!
Older Jeremiah: Sorry.
Sarah: My hair used to be blond like yours. Yours will get darker, too. We're beautiful girls, aren't we?
Sarah: And then I met the most wonderful boy in the world. We would take long walks by the river. We spent hours gazing into each other's eyes. We were so very much in love. And then one day, he went away. And I thought I'd die, but I didn't. And when I didn't, I said to myself "is that all there is to love?"
Sarah: When I was a little girl, our house caught on fire.
Gary: Oh shit.
Sarah: I'll never forget the look on my father's face as he gathered me up in his arms and raced through the burning building and out onto the pavement. I stood there shivering in my pajamas and watched the whole world go up in flames. And when it was over, I said to myself "is that all there is to a fire?"
Margaret: I know who you are.
Margaret: I know what you are. If you come near him again...
Sarah: [interrupting her] You'll what? What are you going to do about it? Hmmm? Sorry, what's he calling you?
Sarah: I like that. Margaret. Classic.
Margaret: Why don't you just leave him alone?
Sarah: Alone? He can't be left alone - he's an actor. If no one's watching him, he doesn't really exist. And for the record, I'm not the one deceiving him. He'll figure it out eventually, and when he does who do you think he's going to blame?
Sarah: One a scale of one to ten, you belong with the nines. We both know you won't settle for less.
[describing how she became the French Lieutenant's mistress]
Sarah: Soon he no longer bothered to hide the nature of his intensions towards me. Nor could I pretend surprise. My innocence was false from the moment I chose to stay. I could tell you that he overpowered me, he drugged me. But it was not so... I gave myself to him.
Sarah: I have set myself beyond the pale. I am nothing. I am hardly human any more.
Sarah: [describing how she became the French Lieutenant's mistress] He took me to a private sitting room, ordered food. But... he had changed. He was full of smiles and caresses, but... I knew at once that he was insincere. I saw that I had been... an amusement for him. Nothing more. I saw all this within... five minutes of our meeting. Yet I stayed.
Sarah: I am the French Lieutenant's... whore.
Sarah: Do what you will. Or what you must. Now that I know there was truly a day upon which you loved me, I can bear anything.
Sarah: I have long imagined a day such as this. I have longed for it. I was lost from the moment I saw you.
Charles Henry Smithson: I too.
Sarah: You have given me the strength to live.
Sarah: [Cecily is talking about sleeping with their principal] Gross.
Nina: Like, "2 Girls, 1 Cup" gross.
Chapin Wright: [to Liza] Look, I know you're about to like, wet your pants right about now, but I'm not gonna ruin Eve's birthday. So you don't have to run home, you can stay. But we're not gonna be down until I get an apology.
Liza: Then I guess we're not gonna be down. I know all about you, Chapin.
[Chapin walks away, Sarah walks up]
Sarah: My mom says she probably needs Ritalin.
Cicely: I'll take a pedicure, Sarah.
Sarah: I'm not touching your feet, Cecily. Seriously, they smell like yogurt.
Cicely: They do not smell like yogurt!
Chapin Wright: [Rules of Triple Dog. Everyone has put all their money and their most prized possession into the 'pot'] Rule one, everyone gets and dare and gives a dare. Rule two, you must complete the dare that's given to you, and if you don't
[Turns clippers on and off]
Chapin Wright: you get your head shaved.
Sarah: Like, no hair, bald?
Chapin Wright: That's the game.
Nina: [laughing] Cool.
[Cecily looks at her in disbelief]
Chapin Wright: Now, if you know there's a dare you can't do, you can challenge the person who dared you, and they have to do it. But if they do it, you get shaved. So, don't go daring people to do thing you wouldn't do, because it backfires.
Liza: What kind of dares?
Chapin Wright: Anything goes. But you can't dare someone to shave their head.
Liza: Why not?
Chapin Wright: Because that's against the rules!
Sarah: [Walks into the party] Why is everyone looking at me?
Cicely: They're not looking at you; they're looking at me.
Stephan: I wanna make... A sweater!
Sarah: A pink one?
Stephan: I can rock pink.
Sarah: Everybody should get naked and run around at least once in their life.
Stephan: Fuck yeah!
Sarah: It was totally liberating. It should be a law!
Stephan: Hell yeah. I'd vote for it!
Sarah: Hell yeah!
Chapin Wright: [Walk up] What are you guys talking about?
Stephan: Gettin' naked!
Sarah: Fuck yeah!
Stephan: Dude... We should *knit* naked!
Sarah: What's third base?
Chapin Wright: Are you serious? *You* dared her!
Sarah: *You* told me to.
Chapin Wright: Oral, Sarah. Third base is oral.
Sarah: Oh. Oral sex.
Nina: Hey, Eve.
Eve: What's up?
Chapin Wright: Oh, I forgot. I'm invisible today.
Cicely: Hello, Chapin.
Chapin Wright: What's the bitch-uation, Cecily? Has anyone ever told you you look exactly like Kelly Ripa?
Cicely: [Flattered] Oh.
Sarah: I love Kelly Ripa!
Sarah: [Liza has dared Sarah to streak. She's standing outside in only a towel] I don't think this is fair.
Chapin Wright: Okay, if you don't wanna do it, then challenge Liza. But if she does it, I'm shaving your head.
Liza: [looks at Sarah] I can tell you, I have no problem streaking.
Sarah: Just because you're married doesn't mean you have to let yourself go.
Sarah: Please... please...
David: What language was that you were speaking?
David: How did you and Victoria come to speak Spanish?
Sarah: It is what we speak at home.
David: Oh, your family came from Spain?
Sarah: About 400 years.
David: They must have some good memories.
Sarah: What did your family think about you joining the RAF?
Sarah: They took my clothes.
David: You walked here like that?
Sarah: I had to see you one last time. I must look...
David: Adorable. Damn it, why can't you look terrible? I've been out walking the streets trying to convince myself I wasn't in love with you and I come back here and you're barefoot and you're adorable.
David: My father believes God is just and merciful and the world can be remade in his image.
Sarah: And you don't?
David: I think God has a lot to answer for. And I don't think you can change the world; not much anyway.
Sarah: I want the red crayon!
Will: You're positive the door was already open?
Sarah: Well then who opened it?
Sarah: It's okay, sweetie. It's going to be okay.
Sarah: It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Paul: I think that Will and I should be the only ones who go outside for a while. We don't know what made Stanley sick, we don't know anything. Nobody touched him so I think we're fine, right?
Will: Positive. You just opened the door, right, you didn't go in?
Travis: I didn't touch the door.
Will: You did what?
Travis: It was already open.
Kim: What? What's happening?
Sarah: The door was already open when you got there?
Sarah: Then who opened it?
Sarah: Who wants sour milk when you can get fresh meat?
Sarah: What's it feel like?
Jesse: What do you mean?
Sarah: To walk into a room, and it's like in the middle of winter. You're the sun.
Jesse: It's everything.
Waitress: Would you like to hear the specials?
Sarah: Ugh, you're not going to eat it...
Gigi: But they work so hard to memorize them.
Sarah: People see you, they notice. Do you know how lucky you are? I'm a ghost.
Sarah: All she really wants to know is, who are you fucking?
Vicky: Can you take us to Isaac?
Vicky: Why not?
Sarah: He's scary.
Job: [Sarah and Job are playing Monopoly] I got a great idea!
[picks up one of the tokens]
Job: Let's pretend this guy is Isaac, and we're gonna put him in jail.
Sarah: But what if he gets a get-out-of-jail free card?
[takes all the cards and throws them across the room]
Job: What card?
Job: I wish Isaac never came here.
Sarah: But he's always been here, just like He Who Walks Behind The Rows.
Olga: Susie... Sarah... I once read that names which begin with the letter 'S' are the names of SNAKES! Sssss! Ssssss!
Sarah: [sticks her tongue out at Olga] Mmmmmmm!
Sarah: Susie, do you know anything about... witches?
Chucky: [during a flashback when Charles Lee Ray kidnapped Nica's mother when she was pregnant with her] It's gettin' late, and I'm gonna go pick up Barbie at day-care.
Sarah: I mean, shouldn't we have some time alone together?
Chucky: What about family time?
Sarah: Right now I want to have you all to myself.
Chucky: Sarah. Sarah, you've had me all day!
Sarah: It isn't enough.
Chucky: That's a selfish fucking attitude for a mother to take!
Sarah: You don't wanna share me with her?
Chucky: No. No. Well, what's gonna happen when the baby comes? Are you gonna keep her from me, too?
Chucky: Because that would be very hurtful to me!
Chucky: And you wouldn't wanna see me get hurt, would you? Would you? Would you?
Chucky: [referring to the flowers he bought for a very pregnant Sarah after kidnapping her] Ya like 'em?
[Chucky takes the duct-tape off Sarah's mouth]
Sarah: They're beautiful. Thank you.
Chucky: Difficult to found when I found out they were not exactly in season...
Chucky: Anyway, enjoy.
Chucky: [Sarah had apparently grassed Charles to the police after Charles sees them arrive at his lair] Why? Why would you want to destroy this family?
Sarah: You destroyed MY family!
[Spits at him]
Chucky: No I told you I always had time for families. Especially kids!
[Chucky stabs Sarah's womb]
Nica: [Realizing why she is paraplegic] You DID THIS to me?
Chucky: No Nica. You did this to me. You and your mommy.
[Flashback to the toy shop scene from the original film]
Chucky: . Got me killed! But I knew a way to come back!
Sarah: [doorbell rings; Nica sits occupied on her laptop, surfing travel websites] Nica?
[doorbell keeps ringing]
Sarah: Nica, that's something at the door.
Nica: I'm busy!
Sarah: Nica, please!
Nica: [annoyed] God!
[Nica wheels herself away from her laptop and goes to answer the door]
Sarah: What are you doing that's so important?
Nica: I was playing solitaire...
Sarah: The computer cheats, you know.
Nica: Yeah, well, I'm used to that!
Nica: [after flirting with the delivery guy at the door] Was that guy hitting on me?
Sarah: Baby, you're beautiful...
Nica: [smiles] Thank you, but I... I think that guy was hitting on me. Maybe I should go ask him out.
Sarah: Nica, he was just being nice!
Sarah: I'm sorry. Oh, honey, I just don't ever want to see you get hurt.
Nica: [Sarah observes her package] I thought you swore off the Home Shopping Network.
Sarah: I haven't bought anything in three weeks.
Nica: Maybe you have a secret admirer.
Sarah: You sound threatened.
Nica: No. Not at all...
Nica: I just wouldn't want to see you get hurt.
Sarah: Paging Inconsiderate: Party of One. Okay Charlie, no sex games till I've eaten.
Sarah: Okay Charlie, no sex kinks till I've eaten.
Sarah: Why me?
La femme: I want one.
Kristen: Look at me!
Sarah: Sorry, I don't converse with loonies.
Sarah: If I were you I'd watch out, new girl.
Sarah: Maybe if we tried working together we could ease some of the tensions. We're all pulling in different directions.
John: That's the trouble with the world, Sarah darlin'. People got different ideas concernin' what they want out of life.
Sarah: I can't belive that Rhodes would have done it.
John: No, he would have had Steel do it.
Sarah: He can't be that inhuman.
John: Captain Rhodes is perfectly human. He knows what he's doing which concerns me. He won't shoot Billy
[points to McDermott]
John: ... because he's got no one else who knows electronics. He won't shoot me... because I'm his ride. He probably won't shoot Frankenstein because the old doc can talk him silly. But the rest of you? The rest of you better start worrying, don't you know.
Captain Rhodes: I'm callin' a meeting for 7:00 tonight! I want everybody present. *Everybody*, lady! Including Dr. Frankestein and including your boyfriend!
Sarah: I gave him a sedative. He won't be awake!
Captain Rhodes: Look here, woman! I'm short on man power! I won't have you goin' around dopin' up any of my men without orders from me! Is that clear?
Sarah: Yes, sir!
Sarah: Fuck you, sir!
Ted Fisher: We've got to have sterile conditions. Half the work we do goes down the toilet due to contamination.
Captain Rhodes: You'll work with what you've got, Fisher.
Ted Fisher: But it's madness! Can't you understand...
Captain Rhodes: [cutting him off] I understand this. You and your playmates, you're running out of friends fast around here.
Ted Fisher: Look, Major Cooper promised us that we would have...
Captain Rhodes: [cutting him off again] Major Cooper is dead! I'm in command now. And I'm telling you that you'll work with what you've got. And you better start showing me some results, or you won't have that very much longer.
Ted Fisher: How can we show you results when we don't have the proper working conditions?
Sarah: We're in a desperate situation here! We need each other. Can't we just get along?
Captain Rhodes: You need us the way I see it, lady. I'm not so sure we need you at all. I'm not even sure just what the hell it is you're doing in there. Just what the hell it is my men are risking their asses for.
Sarah: Well, maybe if there was more cooperation around here, your men wouldn't have to risk their asses quite as often!
John: I got an alternative, yeah, yeah, I got an alternative. Let's get in that old whirly-bird, find us an island some place, get juiced up and spend what time we got left soakin' up some sunshine! How's that?
Sarah: You could do that, couldn't you? With all thats going on, you could just do that without a second thought?
John: Right, I could do that even if all this *wasn't* going on!
McDermott: Nothing, nothing at all.
Sarah: Send again.
McDermott: I've been sending up and down the coast from Sarasota to the Everglades and still getting back the same dead air. There's nothing! There's nobody or at least nobody with a radio.
Sarah: All right then let's set down, we'll use the bullhorn.
McDermott: Set down? Wait a minute, that's not in our contract!
Sarah: It's the biggest city within 150 miles and we're going to give it every chance.
McDermott: Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Sarah: Set down, John!
John: I'll set us down. But I won't leave my seat and I'll keep the engine running. Now the first sign of trouble, I'm going up. If you ain't on board when that happens, you're likely to have a lousy afternoon.
Ted Fisher: What's he trying to prove? I once saw one of those things sitting behind the wheel of a car in D.C. trying to drive down Independence Avenue. It didn't make me want to be its friend.
Sarah: No, it isn't what this one does, but what he doesn't do! He doesn't get excited or agitated when Logan enters the room! He doesn't see Logan as...
Ted Fisher: Lunch.
Ted Fisher: Breakfast.
[Steel is taunting the zombies in the corral]
Pvt. Rickles: [laughing] That's it, Steel! Whip it out!
Pvt. Steel: Fuckin' A! Biggest piece of meat in the cave! I don't wanna frighten the lady, though, not with her boyfriend around.
Sarah: You're incapable of exciting me, Steel, except as an anthropologic curiosity.
Pvt. Steel: Oh, what the hell does that mean, Rickles?
Pvt. Rickles: It means you're a caveman, asshole! You're a fuckin' throwback! You've been spendin' too much time underground! It's okay, Steel - throwbacks all got big dicks!
[Steel and Rickles laugh]
Captain Rhodes: What kind of progress? What are you talking about, "make them behave?" What does that mean?
Dr. Logan: It means keeping them from wanting to eat us for one thing. It means keeping them in check. It's controlling them. Controlling them.
Captain Rhodes: When are you going to show us something that we can understand?
Dr. Logan: Very close... very close! I think in a matter of weeks...
Sarah: [cutting Dr. Logan off] I don't think there's any way you can tell how long anything is going to take. It could be months, it could be years before we know exactly what we're dealing with here.
Dr. Logan: [to the soldiers whom are arguing] Sarah's research is more esoteric than mine. She's looking for a way to reverse the process, a way to eradicate the problem. Could take a long time. A very long time. She may never find what she is looking for. We have a limited supply of chemical agents. Our equipment is hopelessly inadequate.
Captain Rhodes: McDermott doesn't have decent radio gear. Now, you're telling me that you don't have the shit you need? We're running low on ammunition. We're running low on men for Christ's sake!
Sarah: It was very rushed. This operation was put together in a matter of days.
Captain Rhodes: Yeah? Well it can all be taken apart in a matter of minutes, lady! And I'm here to tell you that I'm ready to do that little thing! I'm ready to take the next train out of here!
Dr. Logan: I ask you again, Captain. Where will you go? You have no choices you'll have to give us the weeks that we've asked for.
Sarah: You have to give us however long it takes! Look... there have to be survivors in Washington. They have more sophisticated shelters than this one. There have to be people in those shelters who know about us, who know where we are. With no radio contact, they'll come looking for us...
[Sarah's words are drowned out by the soliders arguing and protesting and jeering]
Captain Rhodes: [to the solders] Shut up! I said, shut up!
[the room is now silent as Rhodes turns back towards Sarah and the scientists and pauses for a few seconds]
Captain Rhodes: You got a little more time. A little more, I ain't saying how much. But you better start showing me some results, and you better not piss me off. You understand? Nothing happens around here without my knowing about it! And anybody fucks with my command... they get court martialed... they get executed. You better know I mean it too, people.
Sarah: You're not all right; you're collapsing from stress. Now let me hel...
Pvt. Miguel Salazar: Collapsing from stress? We're all collapsing. This whole fucking unit is collapsing. Everybody except you. I know you're strong, all right, so what? Stronger than me, stronger than everyone, so what? So fucking what?
[McDermot offers Sarah a drink]
McDermott: It's brandy. Good for the heart.
Sarah: Shit for the heart and it eats up your liver.
[Sarah takes a swig]
[Steel is threatening to kill Miguel for his accidentally releasing a zombie. Sarah trains her machine gun on Steel]
Sarah: Let him go, goddamn it! Or I'll cut you in half!
John: We don't believe in what you're doing here, Sarah. Hey, you know what they keep down here in this cave? Man, they got the books and the records of the top 100 companies. They got the Defense Department budget down here. And they got the negatives for all your favorite movies. They got microfilm with tax return and newspaper stories. They got immigration records, census reports, and they got the accounts of all the wars and plane crashes and volcano eruptions and earthquakes and fires and floods and all the other disasters that interrupted the flow of things in the good ole U.S. of A. Now what does it matter, Sarah darling? All this filing and record keeping? We ever gonna give a shit? We even gonna get a chance to see it all?
John: This is a great, big, 14 mile *tombstone*!
["tombstone" echoes with distant moaning]
John: With an epitaph on it that nobody gonna bother to read. Now, here you come. Here you come with a whole new set of charts and graphs and records. What you gonna do? Bury them down here with all the other relics of what... once... was? Let me tell you what else. Yeah, I'm gonna tell you what else. You ain't never gonna figure it out, just like they never figured out why the stars are where they're at. It ain't mankind's job to figure that stuff out. So what you're doing is a waste of time, Sarah. And time is all we got left, you know.
Sarah: What I'm doing... is all there's left to do.
John: Shame on you. There's plenty to do. Plenty to do, so long as there's you and me and maybe some other people. We could start over, start fresh, get some babies...
John: and teach 'em, Sarah, teach 'em never to come over here and *dig these records out*.
John: Gas up the machine. She's down to fumes.
Sarah: No, wait 'til it's dark. There's too many of them out there.
John: Hey, it's no good to leave the gas tank on the helicopter empty. Supposed we need to get out of here in a hurry?
Sarah: Then we're shit out of luck! They're getting too riled up. Do it tonight after dark when they can't see you.
John: They know we're in here even if they can't see us. What good is it to leave the gas tank empty?
Sarah: The activity excites them! They're too many of them!
Johnson: She's right. They're more and more of them every day.
Sarah: If we get a lot more or if they might break down the fence, you can come out and shoot some of them. Otherwise say inside the building. Stay out of sight!
McDermott: Thankfully you live out here in the suburbs, Johnson. You ougt to see how congested the cities are getting to be.
Ted Fisher: Unbelievable! We've come out of the frying pan and into the fire! I thought Cooper was an asshole, but he was a sweetheart next to Rhodes. We could be in serious trouble here with him in charge. You'd better watch yourself, Sarah. I really mean physically watch yourself from now on.
Sarah: Don't worry. It wont come to that. By the way, where is Logan?
Ted Fisher: You mean Frankenstein? He's in laboratory. Where else?
Sarah: [Possessed] He
Sarah: doesn't care about this whore. But you do... because you want to shove your rotten cock up her juicy ass!
Sarah: [Possessed] What's the matter, Merrin? Don't you wanna fuck me any more?
Sarah: Sometimes I think the best view of God is from Hell.
Sarah: This place... it's cursed.
Candy: [To Sarah] Just go on back and let him know you're next.
Marvin Goldblum: Hi, remember me?
[puts money into Sarah's hand]
Marvin Goldblum: I'm next.
Candy: She's been waiting an awfully long time already.
Sarah: Yeah, two years and one day!
Marvin Goldblum: Kid, you'll understand. See, Dr. Feinstone can't keep me waiting. It's in his own interest. Or.. do we start the audit now?
Candy: Look Mr. Goldblum.... I...
Candy: It's alright Sarah, he won't be too long.
Marvin Goldblum: You'll understand.
Sarah: [Looks at the money] I can't take this...
Marvin Goldblum: Kid, that's nice... but next time take the money. I'll let myself in!
Sarah: [referring to Axel drowning in a pit] We can't just leave him here!
Jessie 'T.J.' Hanniger: Move it - it's too late for Axel.
Jessie 'T.J.' Hanniger: Look, give me a chance! If you still want me to go away I will. But I have to tell you that I love you and want you back!
Sarah: How was I supposed to know that, Jessie? I honestly didn't think you were ever coming back! You just left me here.
[This quote is only spoken in the uncut version of the film]
Sarah: [Sarah sees Axel's collapsed arm buried halfway under a fallen coal tunnel and she gently reaches out to touch his hand] Oh Axel... why?
Sarah: [Axel's hand reaches forward and suddenly grabs Sarah's wrist with a vice-like grip. She gasps in fright and alerts T.J. and Chief Newby] Help me! Help me, please!
[as Sarah's friends try to pull her hand free, Axel saws off his own arm with a pocketknife. Sarah pulls back and te severed arm comes flying out, attached to her. Several of the miners stare in open-mouthed shock]
Sarah: T.J., will you stop this? I don't wanna go with you! Jessie, are you listening to me?
Jessie 'T.J.' Hanniger: Nope!
Sarah: Oh, I don't know. T.J. won't talk to me! He just sulks all day long! He ends up making me feel guilty when he's the one who owes me the apology! And Axel is NOT behaving any better... oh Patty, I don't even know if I wanna go to the dance on Saturday night.
Patty: Oh, but you gotta go! It'll be alright, just stick with Hollis and me! Besides, you've gotta see the dress I bought. Cut down to here, slit up to there, I may not get out alive!
Sarah: Right, THAT'S IT!
Julia Lund: Sarah, do you have bad dreams?
Julia Lund: What happens in your dreams?
Sarah: They come for me.
Julia Lund: Who comes?
Julia Lund: Why do they come for you?
Sarah: To eat me.
Sarah: See? I hate you! I can't stand this anymore!
Sarah: Don't feel too bad. When I first came here, they used to tease me, too. Remember, they used to call me "The Little Farm Girl?"
Frank: Yeah, but that's different. You're dating Gregor.
Sarah: I'm just saying you should lighten up.
Frank: What do you suggest I do?
Sarah: Well, you can't have Gregor. He's already spoken for. Plus, I really don't think you're his type.
Frank: Am I... your type?
Sarah: but in another life?
Greg: I'm sorry, Sarah. I didn't know your father was still an issue. You don't talk about it anymore.
Sarah: So I should cry about it everyday, that way you can remember?
Frank: [on seeing Greg is still alive] Hey... the big prick... I'M GONNA CUT YOU UP!
Sarah: [looks round to see her holding a lighter] You're gonna do shit... FRANK
[ignites the spilled alcohol setting him on fire, causing him to fall off a balcony into a pool]
Sarah: [as she dives into a pool after him] Fuck you... Frank
Pru: What do you think... me and Derek?
Sarah: Yeah, I think you make a nice couple.
Pru: "Nice"? What's "nice"?
Sarah: It was meant to be a compliment.
Pru: We both just sort of gravitated towards one another.
Pru: Do you remember me telling you about my twin sister who died in childbirth?
Pru: I'm pregnant.
Sarah: Is it Derek's?
Pru: Derek's? Yeah. Yeah of course it's Derek's.
Pru: It's exciting though isn't it?
Sarah: I know what I want. And I can show you what you want
Sarah: I believe in you.
Martin Lennox: You waited 20 years for this. What in heaven's name possessed you to come forward now?
Martin Lennox: Sleep?
Sarah: I haven't had a really good night's sleep since I was 11 years old. Those images never left me. Maybe now they will.
Price: We're good.
Sarah: [looking back expectantly]
Price: You and me.
Sophie: You come to me again, still spangled.
Archie: Honey soft smiles, electric eyes that send their charge to warm my cold belly.
Sarah: I am awake now but still dreaming and cannot locate sleep's soft boundary.
Conroy: And so I cross it unsuspecting.
Lois: Pursued by the black magician's cry.
Morgan Hanna, Lois: The shadow man came with satin sheets and tea, talking easily of magic, trick rabbits, and rings.
Conroy: He knew the precise location of sleeping and waking and drew me a map to prove it.
Sarah: But as I slept, I lost the north from the south of it, and he could not follow me there.
Morgan Hanna: Though he tried. For he loved me in his way.
Archie: There was a story in his eyes I tried to read when the sun was high. But he disappeared.
Sophie: Only to return when shadows fell over the windows of his past.
Conroy: Prisoner of my reflections.
Sophie: I tried to touch my keep.
Lois: And in that dark and liquid night,
Archie: I let me (sic) own hands reach you.
Conroy: To loose the ropes that binds us.
Sarah: Let our sails billow wildly.
Sophie: Twined faces, parallel places, came together in the glass.
Jeremy Crown: I'm so filled with longing, to pluck the future from the past.
Morgan Hanna: I see you beckon from afar, spangled as the last night, now with promises anew.
Jeremy Crown: I hear the black magician sing.
Morgan Hanna: And I will follow you.
Morgan Hanna: To the places we have known and the dreams that we have sown.
Morgan Hanna: To watch them flower in the night.
Morgan Hanna: Take me then as I do you. And in that bonding find release.
Jeremy Crown: Come. Know the truth that holds me here.
Jeremy Crown: I wait for you and peace.
Conroy, Sophie, Lois, Archie, Sarah, Jeremy Crown: And peace
Michael: You're Sarah Easton, supermodel. I see you everywhere.
Sarah: You're Michael Shiver, cab driver. I see you nowhere.
Michael: Why did you come here?
Sarah: I came by accident.
Michael: The only accident is you're leaving, but don't worry 'coz it's never going to happen again.
Sarah: [to Larita] I do hope you and John are going to be tremendously happy!
Frank Caruso: What's it like working with those guys?
Sarah: Like a cartoon version of The Sopranos.
Browse more character quotes from I Am Number Four (2011)