Sam Fuller Quotes in Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous (2005)

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Sam Fuller Quotes:

  • Sam Fuller: I don't recall seeing a skinny, white-ass girl growing up at the table.

    Gracie Hart: Okay, first of all... thank you for calling me skinny.

  • Sam Fuller: I am not going out there as a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be Tina Turner. I can't afford therapy on my salary.

  • Gracie Hart: How about a real sorry?

    Sam Fuller: Come again?

    Gracie Hart: You heard me. I said how about a real sorry.

    Sam Fuller: You are about to feel some real pain if you don't back off

    Gracie Hart: You don't want to talk to me about pain, sister. I invented pain alright.

    Sam Fuller: You didn't just call me sister, because I don't recall seeing a little skinny ass white girl around the table growing up.

    Gracie Hart: HEY! First of all thank you for calling me skinny, second of all what is your problem and third of all you'd better apologize to me.

  • Gracie Hart: I just don't see why I can't be Tina!

    Sam Fuller: [with disdain] You don't see that?

  • Joel: [both Hart and Fuller are pointing a gun at Foreman] You see, this is what I like. Learning to work together. A little "Ebony & Ivory" action.

    Jeff Foreman: Guys, I can't do it.

    Sam Fuller: Stop being a wuss, Foreman. Be a man.

    Gracie Hart: Yeah, like Fuller.

  • Sam Fuller: [after Gracie, pretending to be an old woman in a wheelchair, stands up] Ida, you can walk?

    Gracie Hart: Praise Jesus!

    Sam Fuller: Moses!

    Gracie Hart: Moses! Oh, sign me up for this place! The men make me all fachuchin!

  • Sam Fuller: Let me tell you when I'm gonna get you an iced Venti Caramel Macchiato: when they elect a black woman president of the Daughers of the American Revolution.

    Gracie Hart: Okay. And if that happens, I'd also like one of those little muffins.

    Sam Fuller: Where would you like it?

  • Sam Fuller: Plenty of guys have broken up with me. You just beat them up and move on.

  • Gracie Hart: What happened to team yo? You and me in it together?

    Sam Fuller: Don't do that again.

  • Gracie Hart: [singing to the tune of "You Think I'm Gorgeous"] You're my new partner, / You have to like me and... back me up if someone's shooting at me

    Sam Fuller: Not necessarily.

  • Sam Fuller: Okay, look! I don't work for you and you don't work for me. We're a team. Get it? As in 'I will kick your sorry ass if you don't listen to me' team.

    Gracie Hart: Well first of all, if you remember correctly it was 'skinny' ass. And second of all what is your problem Fuller? DO you honestly feel it's okay to go around harrasing people and bashing their faces in? Because guess what Fuller, you will never make it in this bureau if you don't start usuing your head.

    [Sam Headbuts Gracie]

    Gracie Hart: What, you start listening to me now?

  • Sam Fuller: I've got to take her to the bathroom.

    Gracie Hart: I need a tampon!

    Sam Fuller: You heard her, we've got an agent down. We NEED TAMPONS!

    Jenkins: I'm not getting them.

    Hills: I don't even get them for my wife.

    Joel: I guess this is a job for a real man. Any particular brand?

  • Gracie Hart: [Sam Fuller is demonstrating defence on Regis] So remember SING: That's solar plexus,

    Sam Fuller: [hits Regis in the chest]

    Gracie Hart: instep,

    Sam Fuller: [stomps on Regis's foot]

    Gracie Hart: nose,

    Sam Fuller: [punches Regis in the nose]

    Gracie Hart: and groin.

    Regis Philbin: Not the groin!

    Sam Fuller: [hits him in the groin and he collapses]

  • Gracie Hart: You can do this. You know you can because you are Sam Fuller FBI. Nothing and nobody scares you. And I am Gracie Hart and at this moment I am also big bird and nothing scares me except... except loosing Cheryl, because having a friend like her and having any friend for me is a really really rare thing. Okay?

    Sam Fuller: Okay but I am not singing.

    Dolly Impersonator: And here's the fabulous Tina Turner.

    Gracie Hart: Everything's going to be okay, just be Tina - -ish.

  • Gracie Hart: Fuller, I'm sensing a little subtle hostility, and I think we should talk about it.

    [Fuller walks away]

    Gracie Hart: Fuller, you shouldn't keep things bottled up.

    Gracie Hart: Fuller! What is your problem?

    Sam Fuller: The problem is, I don't like you.

  • Sam Fuller: Let me explain something.

    Gracie Hart: Okay.

    Sam Fuller: [Angry] You didn't do what was on the schedule, and I'm a schedule-type person.

    Gracie Hart: [Absolutely uninterested] Oh.

    [Turns towards Foreman]

  • Sam Fuller: Well, like it or not, that plane is not taking off unless we're both on it.

    Gracie Hart: You might consider a tic-tac.

  • Gracie Hart: I just don't see why I couldn't be Tina.

    Sam Fuller: You don't see that?

  • Gracie Hart: That's right, walk away.

    Sam Fuller: You lucky you still can walk away.

  • Sam Fuller: Men. Can't live with 'em; can't live... nope, that's it.

  • Gracie Hart: Come on; come on!

    Gracie Hart: [honks horn on car repeatedly with no results in traffic]

    Sam Fuller: All right all right, clearly that's not working!

    Gracie Hart: Don't start with me, Tina!

  • Sam Fuller: We need a big finish

    Joel: I can take my top off

    Gracie Hart: We need a GOOD big finish

  • Gracie Hart: How about a real sorry.

    Sam Fuller: Come again?

    Gracie Hart: You heard me. I said how about a real sorry.

    Sam Fuller: You are about to feel some real pain if you don't back off

    Gracie Hart: You don't want to talk to me about pain sister. I invented pain alright.

    Sam Fuller: You didn't just call me sister, because I don't recall seeing a little skinny ass white girl around the table growing up.

    Gracie Hart: Hey! First of all thank you for calling me skinny, second of all what is your problem and third of all you'd better apologize to me.

  • Sam Fuller: Okay look! I don't work for you and you don't work for me, we're a team. get it? As in I will kick your sorry ass if you don't listen to me 'team'

    Gracie Hart: Well first of all, if you remember correctly it was skinny ass. and second of all what is your problem Fuller? DO you honestly feel its okay to go around harassing people and bashing their faces in. Because guess what Fuller, you will never make it in this bureau if you don't start usuing your head.

    [Sam headbutts Gracie]

    Gracie Hart: What you start listening to me now!

  • [Gracie is restraining Sam from hitting a tourist]

    Sam Fuller: Too much! Too much!

    Gracie Hart: [pulls Sam aside] Fuller, I don't think you fully understand the concept of TOO MUCH!

    Sam Fuller: Hey, McDonald told me to keep people alone.

  • Brady Mannion: Shit, dude. You and Peyton are like, "done" done?

    Sam Fuller: Apparently, "It's complicated", which means I have no idea what's going on, and she won't talk to me.

    Brady Mannion: [puts his hand on his shoulder] That is a fucking bummer, bro.

    [slaps his face]

    Brady Mannion: But look on the bright side.

    Sam Fuller: Yeah, I'm listening. This should be genius.

    Brady Mannion: Alright.

    [opens the fridge]

    Brady Mannion: Your parents are out of town for the weekend. You have the entire house to yourself, and...

    [takes out two beers]

    Brady Mannion: ... you're suddenly single.

    Sam Fuller: No I'm not single.

    Brady Mannion: And ready to mingle.

    [sits down next to Sam and opens the beers]

    Brady Mannion: We, need to get a party going up in here, right now.

    [Sam gets up and starts to walk away]

    Brady Mannion: What?

    Sam Fuller: That's not gonna happen, man. Besides, I have a history paper due on Monday.

    Brady Mannion: [following him out of the kitchen] That's what Sunday nights and caffeine are for!

Browse more character quotes from Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous (2005)

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