Sal Quotes in RoboCop (1987)

Sal: Okay, let me, uh, try to put this in perspective. You killed a bunch of cops. Word around is that you've got a lot of heavy connections downtown. You make a lot of MY friends nervous. A lot of people... would love to see a guy like me... put a guy like you out of business.

Clarence Boddicker: I don't know. I don't know. Maybe I'm just not making myself clear. I don't want to fuck with you, Sal, but I got the connections. I got the sales organization. I got the muscle to shove enough of this factory so far up your stupid wop ass that you'll shit snow for a year.

Sal: Frankie, blow this cocksucker's head off.

[both Clarence's and Sal's henchmen draw their guns]

Clarence Boddicker: Oooh. Guns, guns, guns! C'mon, Sal! The Tigers are playing...

[slaps the table]

Clarence Boddicker: ...tonight. I never miss a game.

Sal: [grinning] Just kidding.

[signals his henchmen to put their guns away]

Clarence Boddicker: I don't think I want to pay that, Sal.

Sal: I don't give a shit what you want to pay. I set the prices here.

Clarence Boddicker: Listen, pal, maybe you haven't heard. I'm the guy in Old Detroit. You want space in my marketplace... you're gonna have to give me a volume discount.

Sal: Not into... discounts.

Sal: We heard you got whacked.

Johnny C: Yeah, must have been some other guy.

Tony Two Toes: Yeah? Was it some other guy who ratted out Vincenzo Canelli?

Johnny C: Hey, Canelli's a piece of shit.

Tony Two Toes: I got no love for Canelli, either. But you crossed the line, Johnny.

Johnny C: Hey, I'm still here.

Tony Two Toes: Nah, that don't matter. What you did was wrong, John.

John: [entering] No, what he did got a drug dealer and his poison off the streets.

Tony Two Toes: Whose da tree trunk?

Sal: [referring to a sniper perched atop a crane] You think I can hit that guy from here?

Johnny C: Give it a rest, Sal. You couldn't hit the ground even if you fell on it.

Sal: Now, Rosa, would you listen to me. Daredevil motorcyclists always have to have beautiful, sexy broads hangin' around.

Miles: Rosa, I'm your best friend. What do you want us to look like? Phonies or what?

Sal: RIght.

Rosa: Sal, I'm your sister! What about Maureen? She's your girlfriend.

Miles: Come on, Rosa. Maureen is too flat-chested!

Sal: Now get some sleep, I may wish to have sex again before we eat breakfast.

Sal: Okay, it's like this. Bugs is my boyfriend, my partner. Okay? And you are someone I just had sex with. All right?

Richard: Oh, tha - that's fine. That's absolutely fine.

Sal: Good. Now get some sleep. I may wish to have sex again before we eat breakfast.

Sonny: Is there any special country you wanna go to?

Sal: Wyoming.

Sonny: Sal, Wyoming's not a country.

Sylvia: Why don't you smoke?

Sal: I don't want the cancer.

Sal: Sonny? You hear that?

Sonny: What?

Sal: They keep sayin' *two* homosexuals. I am not a homosexual. I want you to stop them saying that. Stop.

Sonny: That's all they're interested in - it's a freak show to them. I can't control it, Sal - let'em say what they want. Forget it. It don't matter.

Sonny: What is this? The FBI? Jesus, now we're talkin', maybe we can get this thing moving. First off, get the lights back on and the air conditioning.

Sheldon: No more favors. That's all over, Sonny.

Sonny: Aw, Jesus... you been doin' us favors all night!

Sheldon: I've got a jet. I'll have airport limousine here in a half hour. I want the hostages.

Sonny: Bullshit!

Sheldon: I'd like to work with you on this, not against you.

Sonny: Well, Jesus, these hostages are keeping me alive.

Sheldon: Okay... when do I get them?

Sonny: At the airport. We get on the plane, check it out, and if it's all okay we'll send them out. Except one.

Sheldon: I want them all.

Sonny: I want to talk to Leon.

Sheldon: I want to come in, and see if everybody's okay.

Sonny: You got guts. You think if Sal and me have cut their throats we're gonna let you out?

Sheldon: I have to see.

[Sal is pointing the gun at Sheldon]

Sal: Tell the TV to stop saying there's 2 homosexuals in here.

Sheldon: I will, Sal.

Sylvia: Anybody got a cigarette?

Maria: Yeah, I do - Sylvia, you don't smoke!

Sal: You don't smoke?

Sylvia: No.

Sal: Why do you wanna start now?

Sylvia: I'm scared to death, that's why. What, you don't smoke?

Sal: No.

Sylvia: How come?

Sal: I don't want the cancer.

Sylvia: Oh, my God.

[to Maria]

Sylvia: Give me the cigarette.

Sal: Go ahead, do what you want. I just think you ought to take care of your body, that's all.

Sylvia: My body? What for?

Sal: The body is the temple of the Lord.

Sylvia: You're serious. So you rob a bank but you keep your body pure. Is that it?

Sal: You gonna smoke the cigarette or what?

Sylvia: Yes. If I die of cancer, it'll be half your fault.

Sal: No, it's because you're weak.

Sylvia: [sarcastically] Right. I'm weak.

Sal: What'd he say?

Sonny: He was talkin' about arrangements . we were talkin' about the TV.

Sal: Why couldn't he talk about that here?

Sonny: He was showin' me how the airport bus is comin' in, like that, Sal.

Buggin' Out: Yo, Sal, we're gonna boycott your fat pasta ass.

Sal: You're gonna boycott me? You haven't got the *balls* to boycott me. Here, here's your boycott, up your ass. You've got a boycott.

Sal: The fuck is wrong with you? This ain't about money. I could give a fuck about money. You see this fucking place? I built this fucking place with my bare fucking hands. Every light socket, every piece of tile - me, with these fucking hands.

Sal: Pino, get a broom and sweep out front.

Pino: Vito, get a broom and sweep out front.

Vito: Huh?

Pino: Get a broom and sweep out front.

Vito: What?

Pino: GET A BROOM AND SWEEP OUT FRONT.

Vito: See, Pop, it's just what I was telling ya. Every time you tell Pino what to do, he tells me to do what you told him what to do.

[repeated line]

Sal: Extra Cheese is two dollars.

Radio Raheem: Two Slices.

Sal: NO service till you turn that shit off!

Radio Raheem: Two slices.

Pino: Turn it off!

Sal: Listen Radio Raheem, I can't even hear myself think! You are disturbing me! You are disturbing my customers.

Pino: Daddy, you know, I've been thinking... maybe we should sell this place, get out while we're still ahead... and alive.

Sal: You really think you know what's best for us, Pino?

Pino: Maybe we can... can we sell this and open up a new one in our own neighborhood?

Sal: There's too many pizzerias already there.

Pino: Then maybe we could... we could try something different.

Sal: What am I gonna do? What am I - that's all I know. What am I doing? I been here twenty-five years. Where am I going?

Pino: I'm sick of niggers. It's like I come to work, it's Planet of the Apes. I don't like being around them. They're animals.

Sal: Why you got so much anger in you?

Pino: Why? I'll tell you why. My friends, they laugh at me. They laugh right in my face. They tell me, "Go to Bed-Stuy. Go feed the moulies".

Sal: Do your friends put money in your pocket, Pino? Food on your table? They pay your rent, a roof over your head? They're not your friends. If they were your friends they wouldn't laugh at you.

Pino: Pop, what can I say? I don't want to be here. They don't want us here. We should stay in our own neighborhood, stay in Bensonhurst, and the niggers should stay in theirs.

Sal: I never had no trouble with these people. I sat in this window. I watched these little kids get old. And I seen the old people get older. Yeah, sure, some of them don't like us, but most of them do. I mean, for Christ's sake, Pino, they grew up on my food. On my food. And I'm very proud of that. Oh, you may think It's funny, but I'm very proud of that. Look, what I'm trying to say, son, is, uh... Sal's Famous Pizzeria is here to stay. I'm sorry. I'm your Father, and I love you, I'm sorry but... but that's the way it is.

Sal: What'd I tell you about that noise?

Buggin' Out: What'd I tell you about them pictures?

Sal: What the fuck, are you deaf?

Buggin' Out: No! Are you? Fuck you! We want some black people on that motherfucking Wall of Fame now!

Mookie: We're trying to go fucking home! We've been here all fucking day, Buggin Out!

Sal: Turn that jungle music off! We ain't in Africa!

Buggin' Out: Why it got to be about jungle music? Why it got to be about Africa? It's about them fucking pictures!

Sal: It's about turning that shit off and getting the fuck out of my place!

Pino: Radio Raheem!

Radio Raheem: Fuck you!

Sal: And fuck you, too!

Punchy: Kick some ass, Sal! Get in there, Pino!

Radio Raheem: This is music. My music!

Sal: Fuck your music!

Radio Raheem: Well, turn it off, then.

Vito: Hey, man, get the fuck out of here! We're fucking closed!

Buggin' Out: Fuck you! We're closing you guinea bastards for good! For good, motherfucker! Until you get some black people on that motherfucking Wall of Fame!

Sal: You're gonna fucking close me?

[Sal grabs his bat]

Buggin' Out: You're goddamn right!

Sal: You black cocksucker! I'll fucking tear your fucking nigger ass!

Punchy: Oh, we're niggers now? We niggers now!

Buggin' Out: You fucking white trash! I'll fuck you up!

Mookie: Sal, put the fucking bat down!

Buggin' Out: Come on, man, you fucking guinea trash! Jump over the motherfucking counter!

Sal: You black cocksucker! You nigger motherfucker!

[Sal smashes Radio Raheem's radio several times]

Sal: Hey. The only ass-kicking that's gonna be done around here is gonna be done by me.

Sal: We got this job on 65th and Third. This big freakin' ballbreaker of a job, right, and we got the area roped off so that some schmuck don't walk through there and take a wrecking ball between the eyes. All of a sudden this woman, you know with the big dark glasses and the Bloomingdale bags, she starts walking right through the ropes and I yell down at her, "Hey! You can't go there ya stupid bitch." And suddenly, this big steam fittin' bursts and this enormous God damn crane crashes right down on her legs. And she's screaming, "My Legs! My Legs!" And I say, "No shit, your legs, you got a two-thousand-pound goddamn crane on 'em." Now , do you know how in an emergency you can get like superhuman strength? I reach down and I lift up this crane and Ernesto was able to slide her out from under, and the doctors were able to save her legs. So the moral is: don't walk where you're not supposed to walk because there may not be someone with superhuman strength to save your little ass. And don't do drugs. That's it!

Angela: Blessed be the sinners, for the day of atonement is at hand.

Sal: Say what?

Stooge: Ang, you can't really believe this place is posessed.

Sal: Nah, just reposessed!

Angela: There's plenty of time for dancing later, now it's time for party games.

Stooge: Yeah, we can play post orifice and you can be the stamp.

Frannie: Don't make me ill.

Angela: I was thinking of something a bit more in tune with the holiday.

Sal: Like what? Bobbing for apples with razor blades in them?

Angela: No! I was thinking more along the lines of a seance.

Judy Cassidy: A seance?

Helen: Isn't that a little chancy? I mean this IS Halloween, the night when all the creepy things are supposed to stalk the earth. I mean there's no telling what we'll drudge up, especially in this old place.

Toby: I feel like we started out on the wrong foot.

Sal: The wrong foot? The wrong foot? You destroyed my $70,000 car. Do you understand that? We've got off on a really, really bad foot.

[Sal's car is destroyed]

Sal: My tape! My Julio Iglesias tape!

[Jack and Max's limo is surrounded by hundreds of angry protesters]

Max Landsberger: This is death! Let's get the hell out of here.

[Jack opens the limo door and gets out]

Max Landsberger: Jack, what are you doing?

Jack Issel: Max, this is a great opportunity for us! There's TV news cameras out there.

Max Landsberger: Jack, get back in the car. Get back in the car!

[Jack walks off into the crowd]

Max Landsberger: [to Sal] Sal, I'm going out there. Keep the motor running.

Sal: I'm not going to do that, sir. The motor could heat up or...

Max Landsberger: [interrupting] Sal, do me a favor.

Sal: What's that, sir?

Max Landsberger: Don't call me "sir". These people are gonna think I'm in charge here. Call me Max.

Sal: Max. Sure, no problem... Max.

Max Landsberger: [on Jack Issel's answering machine] Jack, hi, this is Max Landsberger, I'm in charge of new recuits at INC. I'll be showing you around for the first few days. Now, you'll be starting with Frank Stedman on the 41st floor. I'll meet you at his office at nine. Oh, and congratulations, Jack. You really scored getting Stedman. He's goin' right to the top.

Frank Stedman: [into a phone in his car] Sid! It's Frank Steadman! I'm dead!

Sid: [over the phone] Frank...

Frank Stedman: Finished!

Sid: ...just relax!

Frank Stedman: Helmes swore he wouldn't announce this move until Christmas! It's the goddamn headline in the Journal!

Sid: Hey, no problem, Frank.

Frank Stedman: The SEC's gonna want to know why...

Sid: Hey, we can take care of everything...

Frank Stedman: ...I sold 50,000 Allenville shares...

Sid: ...just relax!

Frank Stedman: ...the day before we torpeded the plant!

Sid: Frank, Frank, can you hold on just a second there?

Frank Stedman: I could go to jail!

Sid: Can you hold?

Frank Stedman: No, I can't hold! What do you- huh? Sid, Sid! Crap!

[to Sal]

Frank Stedman: Will you get this thing movin'?

Sal: [calmly] We're stuck in a traffic jam, sir; I'm not the great Houdini.

Frank Stedman: Well, blow your horn like everybody else!

Sal: Only a fool blows his horn in a traffic jam, sir.

[Steadman, still holding the phone in his left hand, gets up, comes forward, leans over the front seats, and begins pressing on the steering wheel horn with his right]

Frank Stedman: [seconds later, into phone] Please, please, please, just pick up, please! Come on, come on, God, please, Sid-

[click]

Frank Stedman: Sid!

Sid: Frank?

Jack Issel: [drunk] I can't believe I said that on national TV.

Sal: [also drunk] That limo cost seventy-five THOUSAND dollars.

Max Landsberger: Damn it, Jack! We went out there to tell them OUR side of the story. We didn't go out there to tell them the truth!

Sal: And the limo company's gonna have my ass for this.

Sal: [on flight to Australia] Yeah, so, w-what language they speakin' over there?

Tony: Jus' regular.

Sal: You mean, like, American?

Tony: Yeah, regular.

Sal: Is this country's on the other side o' the world they speak the same as us, they, they look the same as us? They don' look like Mexicans or nothin' , do they?

Tony: I got no idea.

Sal: [inspecting TV set in an Australian hotel] You think you can get a color set?

Bell Boy: They only come in black 'n white, sorry.

Sal: You're kiddin' me?

Tony: [handing over a banknote] Here you go, chief.

Bell Boy: What's that for?

Tony: It's a tip.

Bell Boy: Oh, righty-o. Ta.

Tony: [mockingly, as Bell Boy exits] Ta.

Sal: Taaah. Feel like we're... visitin'... hillbillies, here.

Sal: [watching coverage of Vietnam war on TV in Australia] You see that? *That* is why you need color TV. You see the blood; everything. What is it in black 'n white? It looks old. It's like it happened years ago.

Darcy: [having returned from Vietnam war] It's no prettier in colour, mate.

Sal: No? We love this war. We own it.

Sal: Wanna wake-up wit' a ice pick in your eye?

Sal: I know I'm not supposed to say anything here because as a white heterosexual male, by definition I am wrong about everything from jumpstreet. I know that. I know I can't win.

Sal: Right now I'm going to rip him a new fucking asshole

Wayne: Ooh that sounds fun!

Sal: Verbally you pervert!

George: What about intellectually? What about emotionally?

Sal: What about emotionally or intellectually? Now a days most women think monogamy is a type of wood. They don't know how to be it and they certainly don't know how to spell it. And they say men cheat? Well who the fuck do you think we're cheating with? Certainly not you Wayne. You think I'm going to get emotionally connected to a woman like that, I don't think so. And if I want intellectual stimulation motherfucker I'll read a book.

Sal: You don't think I got feelings? Let me tell you something, I got more feelings in my left nut than you too school girls put together

Sal: Blind him.

[reconsiders]

Sal: No... Make him a cyclops.

Sal: She's got teeth like a beaver!

Sal: The day I start worrying about Frankie The Fly is the day I should be dead.

Sal: I need you to be open to the craziest possibilities.

Sal: [after finding a puppy] I'm going to call him chestnut because he's little and brown.

Ray: Where he gonna poop?

Ray: [sees their new house has a balcony] Sal, a place to poop.

Sal: [Laura looks at the girls confused] yeah... urrm...

Ray: Do you think we'll ever get adopted, Sal?

Sal: Probably not.

Sal: [whispers] No dogs allowed!

Anna: Are you an actor?

Sal: Er no I deliver pizzas.

Anna: Oh beca-cause nobody out here does what they do so I thought maybe it was the same for you.