S. Quentin Quale Quotes in Go West (1940)

S. Quentin Quale: I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.

Red Baxter: I don't like your faces.

S. Quentin Quale: I suppose you think we like 'em.

S. Quentin Quale: You love your brother, don't you?

Joseph Panello: No, but I'm used to him.

S. Quentin Quale: Lulubelle, it's you! I didn't recognize you standing up.

[as Quale destroys Rusty's first hat]

Joseph Panello: Hey whataya do with that hat; that hat cost a lotta money.

S. Quentin Quale: How much did it cost him?

Joseph Panello: I dunno; he stole it.

[Indicating a gag around the train engineer's mouth]

S. Quentin Quale: Didya know this is the best gag in the picture?

[Chico suggests telephoning for help]

S. Quentin Quale: Telephone? This is 1870. Don Ameche hasn't invented the telephone yet!

S. Quentin Quale: Madam why is that baby constantly crying?

Mother on Stagecoach: He can't stand the jerks in the coach.

S. Quentin Quale: There's only one law in the west: the law of blood and bullets. It's either shoot or be shot. What are we gonna do?

Joseph Panello: Sue 'em!

Joseph Panello: My father-a shot the Indians in eighteen forty-two

S. Quentin Quale: Oh, he should-a shot the stork-a, when the stork-a brought-a you.

S. Quentin Quale: [dramatically] Suppose I brought you back to my native land. What- what would my people say?

Drunk in Saloon: Burp.

S. Quentin Quale: Well, they'd phrase it more delicately.

S. Quentin Quale: Time wounds all heels.

S. Quentin Quale: Where have I seen your face before?

Joseph Panello: Right where it is now.

S. Quentin Quale: [Obviously intoxicated, commenting on his glass having just been shot in half by Baxter] Less whiskey next time my glass can't take it.

[Arriving at the RR Station]

S. Quentin Quale: Any of you boys got change ah ten cents?

Porter: No.

S. Quentin Quale: Well, keep the baggage.

S. Quentin Quale: There's something corrupt going on around my pants but I just can't seem to locate it.

S. Quentin Quale: I give you my solemn word as an embezzler, I'll be back in ten minutes.

S. Quentin Quale: You know there's a drunk sitting at the first table who looks exactly like you? And one who looks exactly like me. Dull, isn't it?

S. Quentin Quale: Didn't we meet at Monte Carlo the night you blew your brains out?

S. Quentin Quale: You must fan the flames of love with the bellows of indifference.

S. Quentin Quale: Are you insinuating that the white man is not the Indian's friend? Ha! Who swindled you out of Manhattan Island for 24 dollars?

Joseph Panello: White man.

S. Quentin Quale: Who turned you into wood and stood you in front of a cigar store?

Joseph Panello: White man.

S. Quentin Quale: Who put your head on a nickel and then took the nickel away?

Joseph Panello: Slot machine.

S. Quentin Quale: Members of the tribe - I rest my case.

S. Quentin Quale: Now, this is the kind of hat they're wearing this season. This is the 1870 model. It's what they call a pioneer's cap.

[Put's the Daniel Boone hat, backwards, on 'Rusty']

Joseph Panello: Isn't that tail supposed to be in the back.

S. Quentin Quale: Not on him. That's genuine beaver.

Joseph Panello: It's pretty.

S. Quentin Quale: No, now I'll stroke it. It's still my hat, you know. That'll be ten dollars.

Joseph Panello: Ten dollars you want for that old beaver?

S. Quentin Quale: I'm not in business for love, you know. I was in love once and I got the business.

S. Quentin Quale: This is the last hat of it's kind. The beaver's have stopped making them. They're all out playing football. Ten dollars.

Joseph Panello: Well, he's a poor boy. He'll give you a dollar. Will you take it?

S. Quentin Quale: Well, I'll take it but I'm only making a buck on it.

S. Quentin Quale: Let's go somewhere where we can be alone. Ah, there doesn't seem to be anyone on this couch.

S. Quentin Quale: Any resemblance between these two characters and living persons is purely accidental.

S. Quentin Quale: I'm not drunk, but, what's the ceiling doing on the floor?

S. Quentin Quale: He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth, he'd burn for three days.

Joseph Panello: See, you got the Chief mad! Let me talk to him.

S. Quentin Quale: Can you talk Indian?

Joseph Panello: I was born in Indianapolis!

S. Quentin Quale: Panello, this Indian is no Indian!

Joseph Panello: If he's no Indian, why is he wearin' a chicken for a hat?

S. Quentin Quale: Oh, stop it! Trying to pass yourself off as a red man. Why, you can't even speak the language. Let me hear you recite Hiawatha by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

Indian Chief: Ugh.

Joseph Panello: That's not it.

S. Quentin Quale: If it is, they've shortened it since I went to school. And you call yourself a red man.

S. Quentin Quale: What did he say?

Joseph Panello: He said, first they're going to give us a fair trial, then they kill us.

Indian: White man talk too much. Make Chief heap mad.

S. Quentin Quale: White man, red man's friend. White man want to make friends with red brother.

Joseph Panello: And sister, too.

Indian: Chief like pale face who no talk. You pale face friend. Chief like you too.

S. Quentin Quale: Red man you're a white man.

S. Quentin Quale: [to an Indian squaw] You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.

S. Quentin Quale: [Noticing an attractive Indian girl has got Harpo all excited] She gave him the Indian sign.

S. Quentin Quale: [pulls out a necklace] How would you like a little necklace that formerly belonged to the Czarina of Russia?

Indian girl: No like. Me want Cadillac sedan.

S. Quentin Quale: *She's* been off the reservation...

[tosses necklace away]

S. Quentin Quale: [as Harpo and the Indian chief are having a completely unintelligible conversation] You know, it's stimulating when two giant intellects get together.