Rupert Quotes in The Rules of Attraction (2002)

Rupert: I think you're a rich motherfucking motherfucker who owes me a fucking fuckload of motherfuckin' cash, that's what I think, you rich motherfuckin' motherfucker. You want some blow, motherfucker? You bring me my motherfuckin' cash, motherfucker!

[shouts]

Rupert: Fuck you!

Rupert: You want some coke?

Sean Bateman: Um. Sure.

Rupert: Then buy some of your own, bitch.

Rupert: Get it straight, fuckhead: I need you like I need a fucking asshole on my elbow.

[puts elbow in Sean's face]

Rupert: Right here. An asshole. That's how much I need you.

Rupert: Unless he's got a crack pipe stuck to his lips, I gotta assume he's 21 jump street.

Rupert: I really should have gone into medicine instead of publishing. Sometimes though. I think pushing books is a lot like pushing medicine. Think of books as pills. And I have pills to cure ignorance, pills to cure boredom, pills to elevate moods and pills to open people's eyes to the awful truth. Too bad they don't have a pill for bullshit, is what I say.

Leslie: Rupert Marshetta, where have you been all year?

Rupert: The Bahamas, what does it look like?

Leslie: Well, you can't come in here unless you're dressed from Dallas or Dynasty.

Maximilian: [whispering to Rupert] Has he come out of it yet?

Rupert: [whispering back to Maximilian] Come out? He can hardly drag himself in.

Rupert: I do believe this damn whore's lifted my purse.

Rupert: Baynes, have you ever come across him at all?

Will Traynor: No.

Rupert: Fearsome. Total monster. Most days I feel like I can hardly leave my chair.

[Will lifts his eyebrows. Rupert awkwardly drinks tea]

Tony: I need the key for 042!

David: You can't get it, Elaine's not in.

Rupert: Where is she?

David: She's dealing with the raccoons, man.