Ron Witwicky Quotes in Transformers (2007)
Ron Witwicky Quotes:
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Judy Witwicky: [barging into Sam's bedroom, her husband in tow] Oh, for Pete's sakes! You are so defensive! Were you... masturbating?
Ron Witwicky: Judy...
Sam Witwicky: [frantic] Was I master... No, Mom!
Ron Witwicky: Zip it, okay?
Judy Witwicky: It's okay...
Sam Witwicky: No, I don't masturbate!
Ron Witwicky: That's not something for you to bring up.
Judy Witwicky: Okay.
Ron Witwicky: That's a father-and-son thing, okay?
Sam Witwicky: Father-son thing...
Judy Witwicky: I mean, you don't have to call it that word if that makes you uncomfortable... you can call it Sam's happy time or...
Sam Witwicky: [amazed] Happy time?
Judy Witwicky: ...my special alone time...
Ron Witwicky: Judy, stop!
Judy Witwicky: ...with myself.
Sam Witwicky: Mom, you can't come in and...
Judy Witwicky: I'm sorry. It's just been a weird night. I've had a little bit to drink.
-- Ron Witwicky -
[Ratchet runs into power lines, shocking him and causing a tremor throughout the neighborhood]
Ron Witwicky: [crawling under a table] Earthquake! Earthquake! Judy, get under the table!
Judy Witwicky: How did you get over there so fast?
[Outside, a dazed Ratchet staggers to his feet]
Ratchet: Wow... that was tingly! You gotta try that!
Ironhide: [sarcastic] Yeah, that looks fun...
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: [drives past a Porsche dealer] I've got a little surprise for you, son.
Sam Witwicky: No, no, no, no! Dad! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I am. You're not getting a Porsche!
[laughs]
-- Ron Witwicky -
Sam Witwicky: Look, I can't be any clearer than how crystal clear I am being. It just stood up.
Sheriff: It just stood up? Wow. That's really neat. Okay, chiefie. Time to fill her up...
[hands Sam a container and a tissue]
Sheriff: And no drippy-drippy. What are you rolling? Whippets? Goof balls? A little wowie sauce with the boys?
Sam Witwicky: No, I'm not on any drugs!
Sheriff: What's these?
[shows Sam a bottle of pills]
Sheriff: Found it in your pocket. "Mojo". Is that what the kids are doing now, a little bit of Mojo...?
Sam Witwicky: Those are my dog's pain pills.
Ron Witwicky: You know, a Chihauhua. A little...
Sheriff: [annoyed] What was that?
Sam Witwicky: Hmm?
Sheriff: You eyeballing my piece, 50 Cent? You wanna go?
[leans over Sam]
Sheriff: Make something happen. Do it. 'Cause I promise you I will bust you up.
Sam Witwicky: [whispers] Are you on drugs?
-- Ron Witwicky -
Bobby Bolivia: [about the Camaro] I'll let you have it for $5,000.
Ron Witwicky: No, I'm not going above $4,000.
Bobby Bolivia: The door just closed.
[turns to Sam]
Bobby Bolivia: Get out of the car.
Sam Witwicky: Wait a minute? I thought you said "the car chooses its owner.",
Bobby Bolivia: Yeah, well sometimes they pick a driver with a cheap-ass father!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Agent Simmons: Ronald Wikity?
Ron Witwicky: It's Witwicky. Who are you?
Agent Simmons: We're the government. Sector Seven.
Ron Witwicky: Never heard of it.
Agent Simmons: Never will.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Judy Witwicky: Please for the love of God drive safely!
[Sam drives away with the Camaro in a massive cloud of black exhaust]
Judy Witwicky: Wow. You are so cheap.
Ron Witwicky: Well, it's his first car... supposed to be like that.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: You're not taking my son.
Agent Simmons: Really? You gonna get rough with us?
Ron Witwicky: No, but I'm gonna call the cops because there's something fishy going on around here.
Agent Simmons: Yeah. There's something a little fishy about you, your son, your little Taco Bell dog and this whole operation you got going on here.
Ron Witwicky: What operation?
Agent Simmons: That is what we are gonna find out.
-- Ron Witwicky -
[Ron Witwicky walks towards a window]
Optimus Prime: Quick, hide!
Ratchet: Hide? Where?
[the Autobots manage to get out of sight just as Ron looks outside]
Ron Witwicky: Oh, no... look at the yard! The yard is destroyed! There's sparks flying all over the place... Judy, you better call the City, looks like they got a blown transformer! What a waste... Trashed! Gone!
[appalled, he moves away]
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: [brandishing a bat, outside his son's door] 5... 4... It's comin' off the hinges, pal. 3... 2... stand back!
[as Ron gets ready to break the door down, Sam opens it]
Sam Witwicky: What's up?... What's with the bat?
Ron Witwicky: Who were you talking to?
Sam Witwicky: Talkin' to you!
Judy Witwicky: Why are you so sweaty and filthy?
Sam Witwicky: I'm a child, you know, I'm a teenager.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Sam Witwicky: [in a used car showroom] You ever seen "The 40 Year Old Virgin"?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah...
Sam Witwicky: [points to a car] Well, you see this? This is the 40-year-old virgin...
[points to another car]
Sam Witwicky: And this is the 50-year-old virgin!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Judy Witwicky: You know, I think that if there really was some kind of... alien infestation... the Government would be the first to tell us.
Ron Witwicky: [fondling Mojo] Yeah... I mean, this is America.
Judy Witwicky: Yeah, that's how we know we're in a free country. There's no secrets. They'd say "Hey! Duck and cover!"
-- Ron Witwicky -
[watching the news broadcast of meteor crashes]
Judy Witwicky: What did he say?
Ron Witwicky: What?
Judy Witwicky: What did Jack say? Did he see it?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah he saw it. He thinks it's a military experiment.
Judy Witwicky: What a knucklehead.
Ron Witwicky: Yeah. I told him it was a plane.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: Sam!
Judy Witwicky: What?
Ron Witwicky: Sam!
Sam Witwicky: Mom! Dad!
[Rampage launches himself in front of Sam, tossing his parents around]
Sam Witwicky: Wait! WAIT!
Ron Witwicky: Sam, listen to me! I want you to run!
Sam Witwicky: Wait, wait, wai...
[Sam hears a whistle, and catches sight of a hidden Bumblebee... ]
Sam Witwicky: Okay...
[holds up his sock]
Sam Witwicky: Okay, this is what you want... and I know you need me, 'cause I know about the Matrix...
Rampage: [growling] Sam Witwicky...
Ron Witwicky: Sam, just go!
Judy Witwicky: Sam, listen to your father!
Ron Witwicky: Sam, they're gonna kill us all anyway!
Sam Witwicky: Look, just come over here and take it, don't harm them... okay. BUMBLEBEE!
[Bumblebee jumps on Rampage]
Sam Witwicky: Take 'im down, Bee!
-- Ron Witwicky -
[arriving at Sam's college]
Judy Witwicky: Look at this place! I feel smarter already! Can you smell that?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, smells like $40,000 a year.
-- Ron Witwicky -
[after Bumblebee blasts the house to destroy the kitchen bots]
Judy Witwicky: Sam, Sam, listen to me... When you go, he goes. I cannot live with a psychotic alien in my garage!
Ron Witwicky: Judy, national security... Look, if we stay quiet, they're gonna take care of everything. Just consider this the official start of our remodel, okay?
Judy Witwicky: Fine. If the government's paying, I want a pool and a hot tub! And I'm gonna skinny-dip and you can't say shit about it!
-- Ron Witwicky -
[the Witwicky home is under siege by Decepticons]
Ron Witwicky: What was that?
Sam Witwicky: That's the whole kitchen!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: You'll see that a lot in college, too.
Sam Witwicky: What are you talking about, Dad?
Ron Witwicky: There's gonna be a lot of women there.
Sam Witwicky: Yeah, well, I'm a one-woman kind of guy.
Ron Witwicky: Look, Mikaela's the greatest, but you gotta give each other room to grow, okay? You're no different than any other couple your age.
Sam Witwicky: Except we discovered an alien race together.
Ron Witwicky: [scoffs] How long you gonna ride that scooter?
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: Let's go. March, young lady!
[to his son's horror, Ron slaps his wife's derriere]
Judy Witwicky: I love it when you call me "young lady," you dirty old man.
[goes upstairs giggling]
Ron Witwicky: You ain't seen nothing yet...
Sam Witwicky: Dad, Dad, Dad, whoa!
Ron Witwicky: What?
Sam Witwicky: I'm watching what you're doing, Dad. It's not a rap video.
Ron Witwicky: It's just like a coach thing.
Sam Witwicky: That was a really creepy move just now, Dad.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Mikaela Banes: You're the best thing that ever happened to me.
Sam Witwicky: And?
Mikaela Banes: I'd do anything for you.
Mikaela Banes: And?
Judy Witwicky: [watching intently] He's about to say the L-word?
Ron Witwicky: [impatient] Come on, kiddo.
Sam Witwicky: I... adore you.
-- Ron Witwicky -
Sam Witwicky: You don't stop, you don't hide. You run. You understand me?
Ron Witwicky: No!
Sam Witwicky: You've gotta let me go. You've gotta let me go.
Judy Witwicky: Let him go.
Ron Witwicky: You come back! YOU COME BACK!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Judy Witwicky: [touring Sam's college] People are sure friendly here. Some kids just gave me this bag of brownies.
Sam Witwicky: Mom, that's not a brownie! Don't take it!
Judy Witwicky: Sam, I am your mother and I can do what I want!
Ron Witwicky: Honey! They baked it with reefer!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Ron Witwicky: I don't know what's going on, but we gotta move!
-- Ron Witwicky -
Judy Witwicky: Sam, I think for a job interview that you should wear real pants.
Sam Witwicky: I think for life, you should wear real pants.
Judy Witwicky: [Sees Sam's new car] Oh, what happened to Bumblebee?
Sam Witwicky: He's off on his missions. I had to get this for backup.
Ron Witwicky: Your car has a job, huh?
Judy Witwicky: Stop. What does it change into?
Sam Witwicky: It doesn't change into anything. It's a collector's item, Ma. I got it for a steal. It just needs some work. Trust me.
Judy Witwicky: No, I think it's darling. It reminds me a lot of Bumblebee... if Bumblebee were a sad piece of shit.
-- Ron Witwicky
Browse more character quotes from Transformers (2007)
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Characters on Transformers (2007)
- Ironhide
- Sam Witwicky
- Captain Lennox
- USAF Tech Sergeant Epps
- Mikaela
- Judy Witwicky
- Ratchet
- Frenzy
- Trent
- Barricade
- Tom Banachek
- Keller
- Jazz
- Maggie Madsen
- Glen Whitmann
- Bobby Bolivia
- USAF Master Sgt. Epps
- Sarah Lennox
- Tooth Fairy Girl
- Starscream
- Glen
- Manny
- Clown
- International Operator
- Devastator
- Bonecrusher
- Blackout
- USAF Staff Sergent
- Admiral Brigham
- Captain Witwicky
- Boy in Car
- First Sergeant Donnelly
- ACWO Jorge "Fig" Figueroa
- Miles
- Enlisted Aide
- The President
- Mr. Hosney
- SOCCENT Colonel Sharp