Rodrick Heffley Quotes in Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul (2017)

Manny Heffley: I'm texting.

Susan Heffley: Oh, no. No devices on this trip.

Greg: What do you mean?

Susan Heffley: This is an unplugged road trip. No phones. No iPads. No internet. Everyone, hand over the devices.

Greg: You tricked us!

Rodrick Heffley: This is totally not cool!

Greg: You want me to read. I'm reading texts! What's the difference?

Susan Heffley: What is this?

[holds up dirty magazine]

Rodrick Heffley: That's not mine!

Susan Heffley: It was in your backpack.

Rodrick Heffley: No! It was in my room.

Susan Heffley: Does owning this magazine make you a better person?

Rodrick Heffley: No.

Susan Heffley: Did owning it make you more popular at school?

Rodrick Heffley: Yes!

[pauses]

Rodrick Heffley: No.

Susan Heffley: How do you feel about owning this type of magazine?

Rodrick Heffley: Ashamed!

Susan Heffley: Do you have anything you want to say to women for having owned this offensive magazine?

Rodrick Heffley: I'm sorry, women.

Rodrick Heffley: No time-out. Only *death*.

Rodrick Heffley: Get off, Baby Hippo!

Rodrick Heffley: You never sign up for anything at school. You fly below the radar! That way you never raise anybody's expectations.

[from trailer]

Greg Heffley: I can't believe it's so crowded here. Maybe we should come back.

Rodrick Heffley: How about never? Does never sound good?

Bill Walter: Hey, no hard feelings, right?

Rodrick Heffley: Hey, Bill, you know what? After tonight, you're out of the band!

Bill Walter: What?

Rodrick Heffley: That's rock and roll, bro.

Greg Heffley: I was thinking I would write her a note.

Rodrick Heffley: Like, one with words in it?