Richard Temple Quotes in Topsy-Turvy (1999)

Gilbert: You, do?

[referring to the chorus members belief that the Mikado song should not have been cut]

Mr. Price: Yes, sir, we do so.

Female Chorus Member: Yes, especially after all our extremely hard work and of course, Mr. Temple's.

Gilbert: I'm very sorry for you, but as we all know, it's an unjust world.

Male Chorus Member: We all feel it would have been a great benefit to the opera.

Female Chorus Member: And it's fair for it to be left to the audience to decide.

Gilbert: Is this the considered opinion of you all?

Chorus Members: It is, sir.

Mr. Kent: I am not a party to this, Mr. Gilbert.

Gilbert: Ah, Mr. Kent, as ever the sole voice of reason!

Gilbert: [to Temple, who has unexpectedly come upon the meeting of Gilbert and the chorus members] Mr. Temple, what do you make of this occurrence?

Richard Temple: I do beg your pardon Mr. Gilbert, but I have absolutely no idea of what is taking place.

Gilbert: There has been a request that your song be reinstated.

Richard Temple: Ah.

[pause]

Richard Temple: Ah.

Gilbert: A most forceful request, I have to say.

[George Grossmith also comes unexpectedly upon the crowd]

George Grossmith: [to the crowd members] Afternoon, afternoon, please give way.

[seeing Gilbert]

George Grossmith: Ah! Beg pardon, sir.

Gilbert: This is surprising, indeed, ladies and gentlemen, somewhat overwhelming.

Gilbert: [to Temple] Temple, would you be prepared to sing this song at this evening's performance?

Richard Temple: Yes, sir, I would.

Gilbert: [after long hesitation] Then please be so good as to do so.

[Chorus members laugh, cheer and applaud]

Gilbert: Rehearsals will commence in five minutes!

Male Chorus Member: Congratulations, Temple!

Richard Temple: Laughter, tears, curtain.

Richard Temple: [on wearing a sweaty costume during summer performances] I fear that dear Mr. Gilbert has run out of ideas.

Durward Lely: No!

Richard Temple: He doesn't know what to do with me. Ponder this: he thrusts me into a gamut of tight-fitting pots, pans, and pails, and poaches me like a fucking haddock! Forgive my Anglo-Saxon, Mr. Butt.

Durward Lely: Dickie, have you heard the real news of the day?

Richard Temple: Yes, the Fenian bomb. Oh, dreadful.

Durward Lely: No - Grossmith and Barrington.

Richard Temple: [shocked] What?

Durward Lely: They're off tonight.

Richard Temple: No!

Durward Lely: Yes.

Richard Temple: Both of them?

Durward Lely: Yes.

Richard Temple: Why?

Durward Lely: Oysters...

Richard Temple: [gasps]

Durward Lely: We shared luncheon together.

Richard Temple: Did you swallow?

Durward Lely: No, I chose the sole!

Richard Temple: Off the bone?

Durward Lely: Yes, it was rather succulent.

Richard Temple: Wise man. Oysters can kill, you know.

Durward Lely: Oh, unquestionably!

Richard Temple: I had an aunt, choked on a scallop at Herne Bay.

Durward Lely: Really?

Richard Temple: Tragic.

Richard Temple: Shocking news from Khartoum. Something will have to be done tout-de-suite. Mrs. Temple hit the nail on the head as usual.

Durward Lely: Oh, really? What did she say?

Richard Temple: "The nation loses a hero, but the family loses a loved one."

Durward Lely: Oh, how apt.

Richard Temple: One should be rewarded on one's merits, not on one's ability to ingratiate oneself with the management. Particularly when the management have difficulty in locating the relative whereabouts of the arse and the elbow.