Reverend Mother Quotes in Phoenix the Warrior (1988)

Reverend Mother: How does it feel to be the last man on Earth?

Guy: How does it feel to be the ugliest thing around?

Reverend Mother: Girl groups? Boogie-woogie on the piano? What were you thinking?

Delores: I was thinkin' more like Vegas, y'know, get some butts in the seats.

Reverend Mother: And what next? Popcorn? Curtain calls? This is not a theater or a casino.

Delores: Yeah, but that's the problem. See, people like going to theaters, and they like going to casinos, but they don't like coming to church. Why? Because it's a drag. But we could change all that, see? We could pack this joint.

Reverend Mother: Through blasphemy? You have corrupted the entire choir!

[in the hall, Monsignor O'Hara enters]

Monsignor O'Hara: Excuse me.

[he listens to the argument between Delores and Reverend Mother]

Delores: How can you say that? I worked my butt off with these women! They've given up their free time to do this, and they're GOOD! I mean, sister, we could, we could ROCK this place!

Reverend Mother: OUT of the question! As of tomorrow, Mary Lazarus resumes her leadership of the choir.

[Monsignor knocks on the door]

Reverend Mother: COME IN!

Monsignor O'Hara: You took a vow of hospitality for all in need.

Reverend Mother: I lied.

[in a casino, to a group of nuns all dressed in full habit]

Reverend Mother: Brace yourself, sisters. Spread out and look for Mary Clarence. Try to blend in.

Delores: [after putting on the habit] Oh, no! No, no, no! I can't do this. I'm sorry. This is fine for covering a little bulge, but now I've got holster hips!

Reverend Mother: People wish to kill you. Anyone who's met you I imagine. A disguise is necessary to protect us all. While you are here, you will conduct yourself as a nun. Only I will know who and what you truly are. You will draw no attention to yourself whatsoever.

Delores: But look at me! I'm a nun! I'm a - I'm a penguin!

Reverend Mother: As from now and until you leave, you are Sister Mary Clarence.

Delores: Mary Clarence? Like Clarence Williams III from The Mod Squad?

Reverend Mother: Mary is in deference to our Holy Mother. The Clarence is in honor of Saint Clarence of Concordia. There are 3 vows every nun must accept: The vow of poverty.

Delores: Mmm.

Reverend Mother: The vow of obedience.

Delores: Mm-Hmm.

Reverend Mother: And the vow of chastity.

Delores: I am outta here with that.

Reverend Mother: [about Dolores] That is not a person you can hide. That is a conspicuous person designed to stick out.

Vince: [refuses to shoot Delores] Joey, do it.

Joey: I can't, Vince. She's still a nun.

Vince: She's a broad. Y'got it? Just a broad!

Reverend Mother: I guarantee you she is no broad! She is Sister Mary Clarence of St. Katherine's Convent. She's a model of generosity, virtue, and love! You have my word for it, gentlemen, she is a nun!

Willy: Ya hear that? Now, aren't you glad we didn't shoot her?

Reverend Mother: [about Delores] She isn't a nun. Her real name is Delores van Cartier. She witnessed a vicious murder and has been hiding in our convent

Choir Nun: She... she lied to us?

Sister Mary Patrick: She wasn't a nun?

Sister Mary Robert: But she made us sing so perfectly!

Sister Mary Patrick: [thoughtfully] Now that should have tipped us...

Sister Mary Robert: [looking at Reno from the helicopter] It's beautiful!

Sister Mary Patrick: And what a lovely name, Reno!

Reverend Mother: ...and Gomorrah!

Reverend Mother: I fear I am a relic, and I have misplaced my tambourine.

Delores: Ugh! Ugh! Gee, what are you people? A Pridikin order? This stuff is terrible! it tastes like shh...

Reverend Mother: Sisters, we shall spend the rest of the day in silence.

Delores: Well, why?

Reverend Mother: Only when we are silent may our prayers TRULY be answered.

Delores: Then you don't have to eat this food!

Reverend Mother: [bangs on table] Silence begins now... And ends at sundown.

Delores: How can you eat this stuff? It's terrible!

Reverend Mother: [exasperated] Mary Clarence, I think you might enjoy a ritual fast.

Delores: A ritual f...? No. No, no. I don't think I would. I'll put a little salt in it, and it'll be fine. Look, I'm gonna... Somebody pass me the salt over there.

Reverend Mother: A fast. To remind you of those who have to endure without food.

Delores: [as a nun goes to take her plate, she grabs onto it] No, I don't want you to... I don't want you to take my plate!

[slumps as her plate is taken away]

Reverend Mother: And silence!

Dolores: What do we do now? Pray? What?

Reverend Mother: It's 9:00. Pleasant dreams.

Dolores: W-Wait. Are you tellin' me we go to bed by 9:00?

Reverend Mother: If I were you, I would use this time to think about my life and its direction. Or lack thereof.

Dolores: There's nothing wrong with my life. You know, before I came here, I had a career, I had friends, I had clothing that fit. Before I came here, I was okay.

Reverend Mother: Oh, really? From what I've heard, your singing career was almost non-existent, and your married lover wants you dead. If you're fooling anyone, it is only yourself.

[pointedly]

Reverend Mother: God has brought you here. Take the hint.

Reverend Mother: I shall ask Monsignor O'Hara and Lt. Souther to find a safer, and more suitable situation for you.

Dolores: Oh, no. Come on. Don't send me away. Really. I mean, I'm just startin' to get the hang of this. I mean, look. I'm not gonna endanger anyone or anything else. I swear! What about forgiveness? Isn't that what you preach? There's gotta be something around here I can do that's not gonna chip my nails or annoy anybody.

Reverend Mother: You're right, Mary Clarence. To err is human, to forgive divine. You may stay. But I shall restrict your activities to a single task.

Dolores: What's that?

Reverend Mother: Singing. You will join the choir.

Dolores: Choir? No!

Reverend Mother: You will sleep and you will sing. That will be your task until you leave.

Dolores: No! The choir? I mean, have you heard them?

Reverend Mother: The choir, Mary Clarence.