Recorder Quotes in Postal (2007)

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Recorder Quotes:

  • Blither: [Dude has just seen the decapitated heads on some spikes] I see you noticed the heads. Motivational. Those are every fucking bastard I had to climb over to get this job.

    Dude: [Shocked] Jesus...

    Blither: [laughs] Foul. They're paper mache. Heh-

    [to Recorder]

    Blither: He thought they were real.

    [chuckles; then, to Dude]

    Blither: Sit down.

    [Dude sits down as he notices one of the 'fake heads' bleeding]

    Blither: Let's get started. Now, I hope you don't mind the recording. We're gonna use it as training later.

    [Dude is struggling to sit straight on a seemingly broken chair as Blither is telling him this]

    Blither: What the fuck is wrong with you?

    Dude: Uh, it's, uh, the chair is...

    Blither: [Interrupting] Alright, we're on a time clock. So let's get started, alright?

    Dude: Alright. Well... so, uh, I'm here for the job, sir.

    Blither: [looking through Dude's resume] Right, you're a factory worker.

    Dude: I WAS a factory worker, but the factory got closed down. So, I got laid off.

    Blither: I have interviewed fifteen other people for this job. What makes you think you're better than them?

    Dude: Well, I don't know if I am better than them...

    Blither: Well, god damn it, pal! If you want this job, you better reach out and grab it! You better put those fucking heads on the wall!

    [pause]

    Blither: You know what? Fuck it, let's go to questions.

    Recorder: What is your greatest strength?

    Dude: Uh... I'm a really good team player.

    Recorder: Wrong.

    [Types for a while]

    Recorder: What is your greatest weakness?

    Dude: Uh, I'd say I work too hard.

    [chuckles]

    Recorder: Wrong.

    [Types again]

    Recorder: How would you move a mountain using only a spoon?

    Dude: A spoon?

    Recorder: If you were in a box, how would you think outside it?

    [Dude starts to think of an answer]

    Recorder: Wrong.

    [Types again]

    Recorder: Last question: What is the difference between a duck?

    Dude: [Long awkward pause] And...

    [Another pause; Dude is waiting for more to the question, but nothing. Then, Dude stands up in frustration]

    Dude: What the hell is wrong with you people? A wha- a duck? I don- I came here for a job! A JOB! As far as I know, that job has nothing to do with a cocksucking, motherfucking DUCK!

    Blither: [after a long pause] Congratulations, pal. You're our leading candidate. How does it feel?

    Dude: [Surprised] It feels good?

    Blither: No, no, no. How does it feel, huh? How does it feel? I mean, how does it feel to put fucking fifteen heads on that wall? I'll tell you how it feels! It feels fucking great, doesn't it? It feels fucking great.

    [Starts making pelvic thrusts]

    Dude: [Excited] So, I got it! I got the job!

    Blither: Oh, hell no. No, no, no, this is just a getting-to-know-you interview. We still have some more, uh, one hundred and twenty? Yeah, some more candidates, but hell of a start, though.

Browse more character quotes from Postal (2007)

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