Ravelli Quotes in Animal Crackers (1930)

Capt. Spaulding: How much would you charge to run into an open manhole?

Ravelli: Just the cover charge.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, drop in sometime.

Ravelli: Sewer.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, we cleaned that up pretty well.

Ravelli: [taunting Roscoe Chandler] Abie the fish man! Abie the fish man! Abie the fish man!

Ravelli: [asking Roscoe Chandler about his new identity] How did you get to be Roscoe W. Chandler?

Roscoe Chandler: Say, how did you get to be an Italian?

Ravelli: Never mind that, whose confession is this?

Capt. Spaulding: I used to know a fellow who looked exactly like you by the name of Emanuel Ravelli. Are you his brother?

Ravelli: I am Emanuel Ravelli.

Capt. Spaulding: You're Emanuel Ravelli?

Ravelli: I am Emanuel Ravelli.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, no wonder you look like him. But I still insist there is a resemblance.

Ravelli: Heh, heh, he thinks I look alike.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, if you do, it's a tough break for both of you.

Capt. Spaulding: Play that song about the Irish chiropodist.

Ravelli: Irish chiropodist?

Capt. Spaulding: "My Fate Is In Your Hands".

Ravelli: [while Ravelli is playing the same piano part over and over] Say, if you get near a song, play it!

Ravelli: I can't think of the finish.

Capt. Spaulding: That's strange and I can't think of anything else.

Ravelli: You know what I think, I think I went past it.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, if you come around again, jump off.

Roscoe Chandler: Now, please, Chandler is my name. Roscoe W. Chandler.

Ravelli: Yeah, but I don't care about the name. You see, some place I met you before; because, your face is a very familiar. Now, wait, let me see. Were you ever in Sing-Sing?

Roscoe Chandler: Listen, here. I have me a check for $5,000. Now, I give it to you. Here.

Ravelli: Hey, is it good?

Roscoe Chandler: Well, of course it is good. Who would give me a bad check?

Ravelli: I would!

Arabella Rittenhouse: Oh, Mr. Raviola!

Ravelli: Ravelli, Ravelli.

Arabella Rittenhouse: Oh, eh, Mr. Ravelli, I want you to do something for me.

Ravelli: How mucha we make? We maka nothing. The first thing you know we gonna live on a charity. Then, we go to the old ladies home. How do you like that?

[Harpo smiles]

Ravelli: No-no. That's a no good!

Ravelli: How 'bout playing some bridge? You play bridge?

Mrs. Rittenhouse: I play bridge a little.

Ravelli: What do you play for?

Mrs. Rittenhouse: Oh, we just play for small stakes.

Ravelli: And French fry potatoes?

Ravelli: [Bridge game] How do you want to play? Honest?

Mrs. Whitehead: Well, I hope so!

Capt. Spaulding: Play the song about Montreal.

Ravelli: Montreal?

Capt. Spaulding: I'm a Dreamer, Montreal.

Capt. Spaulding: Now, if we can find the left-handed person that painted this, we'll have "The Trial of Mary Dugan" with sound.

Ravelli: Well, I saw that.

Ravelli: Well, I tell ya Capt., you see, my idea of a house is something nice and a small and comfortable.

Capt. Spaulding: That's the way I feel about it. I don't want anything elaborate. Just a little place that I can call home and tell the wife I won't be there for dinner.

Ravelli: Well, look. All you gotta do is open the door, step outside and there you are.

Capt. Spaulding: There you are? There you are, where?

Ravelli: Outside.

Capt. Spaulding: Well, suppose you want to get back in again?

Ravelli: You had no right to go out.

Ravelli: Yeh, right there's the rooms. This is your room. This is a my room. And this is the maid's room.

Capt. Spaulding: Oh, I'd have to go through your room?

Ravelli: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Ah, that's alright. I won't be in it.

Capt. Spaulding: Say, Ravelli, you, eh, you couldn't put the maid in your room, eh?

Ravelli: What makes you think I couldn't?

Capt. Spaulding: Well, there's going to be a lot of traffic in there. I can see that.

Capt. Spaulding: You know, I'd buy you a parachute if I thought it wouldn't open.

Ravelli: Ha-ha-ha!

[points at his feet]

Ravelli: Hey, I got pair of shoes!

Capt. Spaulding: We go to court and get a writ of habeas corpus.

Ravelli: You gonna get rid of what?

Capt. Spaulding: [... ] Haven't you ever heard of habeas corpus?

Ravelli: No, but I've heard of "Habie's Irish Rose."

[Groucho writhes in agony]

Ravelli: I take-a your picture. Hey! Look at me and laugh.

Wolf J. Flywheel: I've been doing that for 20 years.

Ravelli: You kids, you practice until I come back. But-a remember! No woogie-boogie.

Ravelli: Hey, I better not leave you. From now on, you and me is gonna be insufferable.

Tommy Rogers: We can have a party, just like they do in Hollywood.

Ravelli: That's-a fine! Let there be wine!

Wolf J. Flywheel: And women!

Ravelli: And song!

Wolf J. Flywheel: And women!

Ravelli: And caviar!

Wolf J. Flywheel: And women!

Ravelli: And more women!

Ravelli: Hey, Wacky, I gotta good idea. Why don't-a you and me go play for the party? Eh, look how your dressed? You look-a terrible. It's-a whole bunch-a high class-a people there and you are dressed like a scared scarecrow. Well, it's-a too too bad. They wouldn't let you in dressed that way. Goodbye, Wacky.