Ratigan Quotes in The Great Mouse Detective (1986)

Ratigan: Oh, I love it when I'm nasty. Fidget?

[Fidget snores]

Ratigan: FIDGET!

[Fidget wakes up, falling to the ground]

Ratigan: Bright and alert as always. Here's the list. You know what to do and no mistakes!

Fidget: No-no-no mistakes. Tools, gears, girl, uniforms...

Ratigan: NOW, FIDGET!

Fidget: I'm going, I'm going, I'm going!

[Fidget scurries off]

Henchmen: [singing] Oh Ratigan, oh Ratigan / You're tops, and that's that / To Ratigan, to Ratigan...

Bartholomew: To Ratigan, the world's greatest rat! Hic!

[Ratigan does spit take; the henchmen turn in terror]

Ratigan: What was that?

Bartholomew: Hic!

Ratigan: What did you call me?

Henchmen: Oh, he didn't mean it, Professor!

Henchman #2: It... it was just a slip of the tongue.

Ratigan: I am not a rat!

Henceman #3: Course you're not.

Thug Guard: You're a mouse.

Henchman #2: Yeah, a-a big mouse.

Ratigan: Silence!

Ratigan: I have the power!

Robot Queen: Of course you do.

Ratigan: I am supreme!

Robot Queen: Only you.

Ratigan: This is my kingdom!

[maniacal laugh]

Ratigan: That is, of course, with your highness' permission.

[the robot is idle; Ratigan slaps it to start it again]

Robot Queen: Most assuredly... you insidious fiend.

Ratigan: What?

Robot Queen: You're not my royal consort!

Ratigan: [to crowd] Such a sense of humor.

Robot Queen: You're a cheap fraud & impostor!

Ratigan: [under his breath] Flaversham!

Basil: [operating the robot] A corrupt, vicious, demented, lowlife scoundrel. There's no evil scheme you wouldn't concoct.

[the robot goes crazy and breaks apart]

Robot Queen: No depravity you wouldn't commit. You, professor, are none other than a foul stenchus rodentus, commonly known as a...

Ratigan: Don't say it!

Basil: ...Sewer rat!

Ratigan: Fidget, you delightful little maniac! You've provided me with a singular opportunity. Poor Basil. Oh, he's in for a little surprise.

Ratigan: Ah, the uniforms! Oh, Fidget, I knew I could rely on you. Now, you didn't forget anything?

Fidget: No problem. I took care of everything. Everything on the list...

[tries to display the list but, to his amazement, the list is gone]

Ratigan: What's wrong?

Fidget: The list... but I know I...

Ratigan: Where's the list?

Fidget: The list, yeah, yeah yeah. Well, you see it was like this. I was in the toy store getting uniforms when I heard a "aroo aroo".

Ratigan: [irritated] You're not coming through.

Fidget: A dog came! I ran! I had baby bonnet, girl in bag, and Basil ch-chased me.

Ratigan: What? Basil on the case? Why, you gibbering, little... hm... hm... HMMMMM!

[restrains himself as Fidget cowers. Then suddenly calms down]

Ratigan: [chuckles] Oh, my dear Fidget. You have been hanging upside down too long.

[lovingly scooping up Fidget he walks toward Felicia's lair]

Fidget: You mean you're not mad? I'm glad you're taking it so well.

[Ratigan rings the dinner bell to summon Felicia]

Fidget: [as he's being eaten] Aaaah! Not me, you idiot! No, stop, you stupid furball! Open up! Open up! You're hurting my wings!

Ratigan: [rubbing his forehead] How dare that idiot Basil poke his stupid nose into my wonderful scheme and foul up everything?

Ratigan: Now, you will remember to smile for the camera, won't you? Say "Cheese".

Dr. Dawson: You're... despicable!

Ratigan: Hehe... Yes.

Ratigan: [standing atop Big Ben, having thrown Basil off] I've won!

[laughs maniacally]

Basil: [hanging from the severed blimp's propeller] On the contrary! The game's not over yet!

[clock shifts and tolls the hour]

Hiram Flaversham: You can do what you want with me. I won't be a part of this-this... this evil any longer!

Ratigan: Oh, very well, if that is your decision.

[pulls out Olivia's toy ballerina and winds it up]

Ratigan: Oh, by the way, I'm taking the liberty of having your daughter brought here.

Hiram Flaversham: O... Olivia?

Ratigan: Yes. I would spend many a sleepless night if anything unfortunate were to befall her.

Hiram Flaversham: You... Y-You wouldn't!

[Ratigan crushes the ballerina in his hand and looks forlornly at it, then at Flaversham]

Ratigan: Finish it, Flaversham!

Ratigan: Oh, my dear Bartholomew. I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me. You know what happens when someone upsets me.

Ratigan: [reading a list of newly devised laws] Item 96: A heavy tax shall be levied against all parasites and spongers, such as the elderly, the infirm, and especially little children.

Ratigan: You don't know what a delightful dilemma it was, trying to decide on the most appropriate method for your demise. Oh, I had so many ingenious ideas I didn't know which to choose. So I decided to use them all. Marvelous, isn't it? But, here, let me show you how it works. Picture this. First, a sprightly tune I've recorded especially for you. As the song plays, the cord tightens, and when the song ends, the metal ball is released, rolling along its merry way until...

[points at mousetrap]

Ratigan: Snap!

[points at gun]

Ratigan: Boom!

[points at crossbow]

Ratigan: Twang!

[points at axe]

Ratigan: Thunk!

[points at anvil]

Ratigan: Splat! And so ends the short, undistinguished career of Basil of Baker Street.

[Ratigan has ridiculed Basil]

Dr. Dawson: You fiend!

Ratigan: Sorry, chubby. You should have chosen your friends more carefully.

[henchmen cheer as Ratigan reviews his illustrious career]

Ratigan: Thank you, thank you. But it hasn't all been champagne and caviar. I've had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable, second-rate detective, Basil of Baker Street!

Henchmen: Boo!

Ratigan: For years, that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans, and I haven't had a moment's peace of mind.

Henchmen: Aaw...

Bartholomew: [cries]

Ratigan: But all that's in the past! This time, nothing, not even Basil, can stand in my way! All will bow before me!

Basil: [enraged] Ratigan, so help me, I'll see you behind bars yet!

Ratigan: [face gets close to Basil's] You fool!

Ratigan: [grabs Basil by the collar and lifts him off of the ground]

Ratigan: Isn't it clear to you? The superior mind has triumphed! I've won!

Ratigan: [laughs evilly]

[Fidget gets tired of pedaling Ratigan's airship]

Fidget: [gesturing at Olivia] We have to lighten the load.

Ratigan: Oh, you want to lighten the load? Excellent idea.

[grabs Fidget and throws him overboard]

Fidget: No! Not me! Wait, I can't fly! I can't fly!

Ratigan: My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy!

[henchmen cheer]

Ratigan: Tomorrow evening, our beloved monarch celebrates her Diamond Jubilee. And with the enthusiastic help of our good friend, Mr. Flaversham...

[henchmen chuckle]

Ratigan: ...it promises to be a night she'll never forget.

[burns picture of Queen with cigarette]

Ratigan: Her last night, and my first as supreme ruler of all mousedom!

Ratigan: Oh, Felicia, my precious, my baby. Did daddy's little honey-bunny enjoy her tasty treat?

Ratigan: Bravo! Bravo! A marvelous performance! Although I was expecting you fifteen minutes earlier. Trouble with the chemistry set, old boy?