Pupils Quotes in The Meaning of Life (1983)

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Pupils Quotes:

  • Humphrey: So, just listen. Now, did I or did I not... do... vaginal... juices?

    Pupils: Mmm. Mmm. Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

    Humphrey: Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson.

    Watson: R - rubbing the clitoris, sir?

    Humphrey: What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy.

    Wymer: Suck the nipple, sir?

    Humphrey: Good. Good. Well done, Wymer.

    Pupil: Uh, stroking the thighs, sir.

    Humphrey: Yes. Yes, I suppose so. Hmm?

    Pupil: Oh, sir. Biting the neck.

    Humphrey: Yes. Good. Nibbling the earlobe, uhh, kneading the buttocks, and so on and so forth. So, we have all these possibilities before we stampede towards the clitoris, Watson.

    Watson: Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

  • Humphrey: All right, settle down. Settle down... Now, before I begin the lesson, will those of you who are playing in the match this afternoon move your clothes down onto the lower peg immediately after lunch, before you write your letter home, if you're not getting your hair cut, unless you've got a younger brother who is going out this weekend as the guest of another boy, in which case, collect his note before lunch, put it in your letter after you've had your hair cut, and make sure he moves your clothes down onto the lower peg for you. Now...

    Wymer: Sir?

    Humphrey: Yes, Wymer?

    Wymer: My younger brother's going out with Dibble this weekend, sir, but I'm not having my hair cut today, sir.

    Pupils: [chuckling]

    Wymer: So, do I move my clothes down, or...

    Humphrey: I do wish you'd listen, Wymer. It's perfectly simple. If you're not getting your hair cut, you don't have to move your brother's clothes down to the lower peg. You simply collect his note before lunch, after you've done your scripture prep, when you've written your letter home, before rest, move your own clothes onto the lower peg, greet the visitors, and report to Mr. Viney that you've had your chit signed.

  • Humphrey: Now, sex. Sex, sex, sex. Where were we?

    [pupils can't remember]

    Humphrey: Well, had I got as far as the penis entering the vagina?

    Pupils: Uh, no, sir. No, sir.

    Humphrey: Well, had I done foreplay?

    Pupils: Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

    Humphrey: Ah. Well, as we all know all about foreplay, no doubt you can tell me what the purpose of foreplay is. Biggs.

    Biggs: Um, don't know. Sorry, sir.

    Humphrey: Carter?

    Carter: Oh. Uh, was it taking your clothes off, sir?

    Humphrey: Well, a-and after that?

    Wymer: [Misunderstanding] Oh! Putting them on a lower peg, sir.

    [Humphrey chucks an object at Wymer for his stupidity]

    Humphrey: The purpose of foreplay is to cause the vagina to lubricate so that the penis can penetrate more easily.

Browse more character quotes from The Meaning of Life (1983)

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