Punch Epstein Quotes in The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green (2005)

Punch Epstein: You don't have a cell phone, do you?

Ethan Green: No.

Punch Epstein: Oh my God, that is so hot! A gay guy without a cell phone.

Punch Epstein: Hey. No offense, I despise small talk. My name's Punch. I'm a sensitive, globally aware kind of guy who's horny 24 hours a day. My likes are dick, dick, and more dick. My pet peeves are rainy days, cum stains on new shirts and people who eat bananas with their mouths open. It makes that squishy noise, you know? That's a whole evening of small talk right there.

Punch Epstein: Don't be afraid of the Punch.

Ethan Green: How old are you?

Punch Epstein: 19, but I'm petulant.

Punch Epstein: Fear is the darkroom where all negatives are developed.

Ethan Green: Wow, who wrote that?

Punch Epstein: Barbara Walters from "The View". Or maybe it was the fat one.

[in the middle of a blowjob]

Ethan Green: Thanks for delivering.

Punch Epstein: It's what I do best.

Ethan Green: No, I mean about today. You really came through for me, and I appreciate that. Kyle ...

Punch Epstein: Ooh, we haven't done our job if you still remember his name.

Punch Epstein: Remember when you said you never really get over people? FYI, I'm totally over you.