Professor Henry Jones Quotes in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

Sallah: Please, what does it always mean, this... this "Junior"?

Professor Henry Jones: That's his name.

[points to himself]

Professor Henry Jones: Henry Jones...

[points to Indy]

Professor Henry Jones: ...Junior.

Indiana Jones: I like "Indiana."

Professor Henry Jones: We named the *dog* Indiana.

Marcus Brody: May we go home now, please?

Sallah: The dog?

[starts laughing]

Sallah: You are named after the dog? HA HA HA...!

Indiana Jones: I've got a lot of fond memories of that dog.

[Nazi Colonel Vogel is torturing Henry to get answers]

Colonel Vogel: Tell me about this miserable little diary of yours. The book is useless and yet you come all the way back to Berlin to get it. Why?

[he slaps Henry in the face with his glove]

Colonel Vogel: Why?

[he slaps him again]

Colonel Vogel: What are you hiding?

[he slaps him again]

Colonel Vogel: What does the diary tell you that it doesn't tell us?

[he tries to slap him again; Henry grabs his wrist, stopping him]

Professor Henry Jones: [through his teeth] It tells me, that goose-stepping morons like yourself should try *reading* books instead of *burning* them!

Indiana Jones: [of Indy's new lover] How did you know she was a Nazi?

Professor Henry Jones: She talks in her sleep.

[talking about how they both slept with the same woman]

Indiana Jones: It's disgraceful, you're old enough to be her... her grandfather.

Professor Henry Jones: Well, I'm as human as the next man.

Indiana Jones: Dad, I *was* the next man.

Professor Henry Jones: Oh... ships that pass in the night.

Professor Henry Jones: The Word of God.

Marcus Brody: No, Henry. Try not to talk.

Professor Henry Jones: The Name of God.

Indiana Jones: The Name of God... Jehovah.

Professor Henry Jones: But in the Latin alphabet, "Jehovah" begins with an "I".

Indiana Jones: J-...

[he steps on the "J" and almost falls to his death; he scrambles back up]

Indiana Jones: Oh, *idiot*! In Latin Jehovah begins with an "I"!

Elsa: It's perfectly obvious where the pages are. He's given them to Marcus Brody.

Professor Henry Jones: Marcus? You didn't drag poor Marcus along did you? He's not up to the challenge.

Walter Donovan: He sticks out like a sore thumb. We'll find him.

Indiana Jones: The hell you will. He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Brody's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.

[Cut to middle of fair in the Middle East, Marcus Brody wearing bright suit and white hat, sticking out like sore thumb]

Marcus Brody: Uhhh, does anyone here speak English?

[Indiana and Henry are tied up]

Indiana Jones: Come on, dad. Help me get us out of here. We have to get to Marcus before the Nazis do.

Professor Henry Jones: But you said he had a two day head start. That he would blend in, disappear.

Indiana Jones: Are you kidding? I made all that up. You know Marcus. He once got lost in his own museum.

Professor Henry Jones: I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne. Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky...

Professor Henry Jones: Those people are trying to kill us!

Indiana Jones: [shouts] I know, Dad!

Professor Henry Jones: This is a new experience for me.

Indiana Jones: It happens to me all the time.

Elsa: [to Indy] I'll never forget how vonderful it vas.

Professor Henry Jones: Why thank you. It was rather wonderful.

Elsa: [kisses Indy] Zat's how Austrians say goodbye.

Colonel Vogel: Und zis is how ve zay goodbye in Germany, Dr. Jones.

[punches Indy with the head of his cane; Indy's head smacks into Henry's behind him]

Indiana Jones: I liked the Austrian way better.

Professor Henry Jones: So did I.

[after commandeering a plane]

Professor Henry Jones: I didn't know you could fly a plane.

Indiana Jones: Fly, yes. Land, no.

[Indiana Jones and Professor Jones Sr. are trapped between a room on fire and a room full of Nazis]

Professor Henry Jones: Our situation has not improved.

Professor Henry Jones: [accidentally shoots their own plane with the machine gun]

Indiana Jones: Dad, are we hit?

Professor Henry Jones: More or less. Son, I'm sorry. They got us.

[Indiana slips and nearly falls into the abyss, but Henry grabs his hand]

Professor Henry Jones: Junior, give me your other hand! I can't hold on!

Indiana Jones: [reaching for the Grail] I can get it. I can almost reach it, Dad...

Professor Henry Jones: Indiana.

[surprised, Indy looks up at his father]

Professor Henry Jones: Indiana... let it go.

Professor Henry Jones: Elsa never really believed in the grail. She thought she'd found a prize.

Indiana Jones: And what did you find, Dad?

Professor Henry Jones: Me? Illumination.

[Vogel is holding Elsa hostage at gunpoint]

Colonel Vogel: Throw down the gun or the girl will die.

Professor Henry Jones: But she's one of them.

Elsa: Indy, please!

Professor Henry Jones: She's a Nazi.

Indiana Jones: What?

Professor Henry Jones: Trust me.

Elsa: Indy, help!

Colonel Vogel: I will kill her!

Professor Henry Jones: Oh yeah? Go ahead.

Indiana Jones: No! Don't shoot!

Professor Henry Jones: Don't worry. He won't.

Elsa: Indy, please do what he says!

Professor Henry Jones: And don't listen to her.

Colonel Vogel: Enough! She dies!

Indiana Jones: Wait! Wait.

[Indy tosses over the gun. Vogel lets Elsa go and she runs right into Indy's arms]

Elsa: I'm sorry.

Indiana Jones: Don't be.

[Elsa takes the grail diary from Indy's pocket, smiles, then hands it to Vogel]

Elsa: But you should have listened to your father.

Indiana Jones: [as the room is burning] Dad!

Professor Henry Jones: What?

Indiana Jones: Dad!

Professor Henry Jones: What?

Indiana Jones: DAD!

Professor Henry Jones: WHAT?

Indiana Jones: Dad, head for the fireplace!

Professor Henry Jones: The quest for the grail is not archeology, it's a race against evil. If it is captured by the Nazis the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the earth. Do you understand me?

Indiana Jones: This is an obsession, Dad. I've never understood it. Never. Neither did Mom.

Professor Henry Jones: Oh yes she did. Only too well. Unfortunately, she kept her illness from me. All I could do was mourn her.

Professor Henry Jones: I'm sorry about your head though. But I thought that you were one of them.

Indiana Jones: Dad, they come in through the doors.

Professor Henry Jones: Ha, good point.

[to Indiana, while watching a Nazi parade and book burning]

Professor Henry Jones: My son, we're pilgrims in an unholy land.

[Indiana Jones walks over after climbing up from the cliff and Professor Henry Jones grabs him in hug]

Professor Henry Jones: I thought I'd lost you boy.

Indiana Jones: I thought you had too Sir.

Professor Henry Jones: [moves back and attempts to compose himself] Well... well done. Come on.

[Professor Henry Jones walks away and Indiana Jones collapses to the ground in exhaustion]

Professor Henry Jones: [looks back and frowns] Why are you sitting there resting when we're so near the end?

Professor Henry Jones: Marcus.

Marcus Brody: Aah.

Professor Henry Jones: Genius of the res-to-ration.

[Brody finishes the handshake]

Marcus Brody: Aid our own re-sus-ci-tation. Henry, what are you doing here?

Professor Henry Jones: It's a rescue. Come on.

[the Nazis catch both Marcus and Henry]

Professor Henry Jones: And in this sort of race, there's no silver medal for finishing second.

Principal SS Officer at Castle: [the Nazis burst into the room] Dr. Jones?

Indiana Jones, Professor Henry Jones: Yes?

Principal SS Officer at Castle: I will take zuh book now.

Indiana Jones, Professor Henry Jones: Wuh-what b-book?

Principal SS Officer at Castle: You have zuh diary in your pocket.

Professor Henry Jones: You dolt! You think my son would be that stupid? That he would bring my diary all the way back here?

[pause]

Professor Henry Jones: You didn't, did you?

[another pause]

Professor Henry Jones: You didn't bring it, did you?

Indiana Jones: Well, uh...

Professor Henry Jones: You *did*!

Indiana Jones: Look, can we discuss this later?

Professor Henry Jones: I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers!

Indiana Jones: Will you take it easy?

Professor Henry Jones: Take it easy? Why do you think I sent it home in the first place? So it wouldn't fall into their hands!

Indiana Jones: I came here to SAVE you!

Professor Henry Jones: Oh, yeah? And who's gonna come to save you, JUNIOR?

Indiana Jones: [shouts] I told you...

[grabs a gun and shoots all soldiers dead]

Indiana Jones: DON'T call me Junior!

Professor Henry Jones: Look what you did! I can't believe what you did!

[Indy has untied a boat as a diversion for the Nazis]

Indiana Jones: Come on, Dad! Come on!

Professor Henry Jones: What about the boat? We're not going on the boat?

Indiana Jones: I can remeber the last time we had a drink together. I had a milkshake. but, we didn't talk, we've never talked. Only if you were a regular dad just like the other boy's dad, this would be different.

Professor Henry Jones: I was a wonderful father.

Indiana Jones: Yeah, how?

Professor Henry Jones: Did I ever tell you to eat up, go to bed, wash your ears, do your homework? No, I respected your privacy and I taught you self reliance.

Indiana Jones: What you taught me, is that I was less important to you than people that have been dead for several hundered years and in other countries, and I learned it so well, that we've hardly spoken for 20 years.

Professor Henry Jones: You left, just as you were becoming interesting.

[Closes his diary]

Professor Henry Jones: Okay, I 'm here what you wanna talk about?

Indiana Jones: [At a lost for words] I... I don't know.

Professor Henry Jones: Then, what are you complaining about? Now, he who finds the Grail must face 3 challenges. First, is the path of God: Only the penitent man shall pass. Second, is the word of God: Only in the footsteps of God, shall he proceed. Last is the breath of God: Only in a leap from the lion's head shall he prove his worth.

[last lines]

Marcus Brody: Indy, Henry, follow me. I know the way. Ha!

[Marcus' horse rides off with him barely hanging onto it]

Professor Henry Jones: Got lost in his own museum, eh?

Indiana Jones: Uh-huh.

Professor Henry Jones: After you, Junior.

Indiana Jones: Yes, sir. Ha!

[Indy and his father have stolen a plane from the airship, and are now being chased by German fighters]

Indiana Jones: Dad, you're going to have to use the machine gun. Get it ready!

[Henry turns around and gets the gun ready]

Indiana Jones: [spotting an approaching fighter] 11 o'clock! Dad, 11 o'clock!

Professor Henry Jones: [looking at his watch] What happens at 11 o'clock?

Professor Henry Jones: I find, that if I just sit down to think...

[sits in chair, which tilts backward and opens up a hidden staircase]

Indiana Jones: [falling down hidden staircase] Daaaaad!

Professor Henry Jones: [resetting chair legs] The solution presents itself!

Professor Henry Jones: [Examining the broken vase] Late 14th Ming Dynasty. Oh it breaks the heart.

Indiana Jones: And the head. You hit me dad.

Professor Henry Jones: I'll never forgive myself.

Indiana Jones: Don't worry I'm all right.

Professor Henry Jones: Thank God... it's fake. See you can tell with the cross sections.

Indiana Jones: Jesus Christ...

Professor Henry Jones: [slaps him] That's for blasphemy.

Indiana Jones: [Looking through his binoculars and seeing a tank] 12 pound gun.

Professor Henry Jones: What are you doing? Get down.

Indiana Jones: Dad, we're well out of range.

[the tanks fires on them]

Professor Henry Jones: You say this has been just another typical day for you huh?

Indiana Jones: NO. It's been better than most.

Indiana Jones: [Being tied up together] We gotta get free, dad. We've gotts get to Marcus before the Nazis do.

Professor Henry Jones: I thought that Marcus had a 2 day head start, and would vanish, disappear.

Indiana Jones: No. I made that up. C'mon dad, you know Marcus he got lost in one of his own museums one time. Dad, can you reach into my left pocket?

Professor Henry Jones: What will I find?

Indiana Jones: [Sarcastically] A lucky charm.

Professor Henry Jones: [Reaches into Indy's left jacket pocket] Feels like a cigarette lighter.

Indiana Jones: Use it to burn the ropes.

[Then Henry lights thew lighter and reaches back and burns himself androps the lighter to the floor, and after blowing on it a few times he starts a fire]

Professor Henry Jones: Son, there's something I have to tell you.

Indiana Jones: Don't get sentimental now dad, save until we get out.

Professor Henry Jones: The floor is in fire, and the chair.

Professor Henry Jones: You call *this* archaeology?

Professor Henry Jones: Junior?

Indiana Jones: Yes, sir.

Professor Henry Jones: It *is* you, Junior.

Indiana Jones: Don't call me that. *Please*.

Professor Henry Jones: Stop. You're going the wrong way. We need to get to Berlin.

Indiana Jones: Brody's this way.

Professor Henry Jones: My diary's in Berlin.

Indiana Jones: We don't need the diary, Dad. Marcus has the map.

Professor Henry Jones: There is more in the diary than just the map.

Indiana Jones: Half the German army's on our tail and you want me to go to Berlin? Into the lion's den?

Professor Henry Jones: Yes. The only thing that matters is the Grail.

Indiana Jones: What about Marcus?

Professor Henry Jones: Marcus would agree with me!

Professor Henry Jones: I misjudged you, Walter. I knew you would sell your mother for an Etruscan vase. But I didn't know you would sell out your country and your soul... to the slime of humanity.

Professor Henry Jones: [after hearing that Indy read the tablet] If only I could have been there with you.

Indiana Jones: There were rats, Dad.

Professor Henry Jones: [Startled] Rats?

[Indy and his father have boarded the airship]

Indiana Jones: Well, we made it!

Professor Henry Jones: [looking out from behind his newspaper] When we are airborne, with Germany behind us, *then* I will share that sentiment!

[repeated line]

Professor Henry Jones: This is intolerable!

Professor Henry Jones: [after escaping from the Nazis, and coming onto a road sign] Stop, wait, stop! Stop! You're going the wrong way. We have to get to Berlin.

Indiana Jones: [Points to the sign] Brody's *this* way.

Professor Henry Jones: My diary's in Berlin.

Indiana Jones: [cross] We don't need the diary, dad; Marcus has the map.

Professor Henry Jones: There is more in the diary than *just the map*.

Indiana Jones: [stops the motorcycle, annoyed] All right, Dad. Tell me.

Professor Henry Jones: Well, he who finds the Grail must face the final challenge.

Indiana Jones: What final challenge?

Professor Henry Jones: Three devices of such lethal cunning.

Indiana Jones: Booby traps?

Professor Henry Jones: Oh, yes. But I found the clues that will safely take us through them in the Chronicles of St. Anselm.

Indiana Jones: [pleased] Well, what are they?

[annoyed]

Indiana Jones: Can't you remember?

Professor Henry Jones: I wrote them down in my diary so that I wouldn't *have* to remember.

Indiana Jones: [angry] Half the German Army's on our tail and you want me to go to Berlin? Into the lion's den?

Professor Henry Jones: Yes! The only thing that matters is the Grail.

Indiana Jones: What about Marcus?

Professor Henry Jones: Marcus would agree with me!

Indiana Jones: [quietly] Two selfless martyrs; Jesus Christ.

Professor Henry Jones: [slaps Indy, angrily] That was for blasphemy! The quest for the Grail is not archaeology; it's a race against evil! If it is captured by the Nazis, the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the Earth! Do you understand me?

Indiana Jones: [Still annoyed] This is an obsession, dad. I *never* understood it. Never. Neither did mom.

Professor Henry Jones: Oh, yes she did. Just all too well. But, she kept her illness from me. All I could do was mourn her.

Professor Henry Jones: Nice landing.

Indiana Jones: Thank you.

Indiana Jones: [Indy bursts through the window into his father's room. He's hit on the head with a vase]

Professor Henry Jones: Junior!

Indiana Jones: [reflexively] Yes, sir!

Professor Henry Jones: It IS you, Junior!

Indiana Jones: Don't call me that, please!

[Henry Jones has just disarmed a Nazi soldier by squirting ink in his face from his fountain pen]

Marcus Brody: [meaningfully] Henry... the pen.

Professor Henry Jones: What?

Marcus Brody: Don't you see? The *pen* is mightier than the sword!

[Brody smiles goofily yet happily]

Indiana Jones: It was just the two of us, dad. It was a lonely way to grow up. For you, too. If you had been an ordinary, average father like the other guys' dads, you'd have understood that.

Professor Henry Jones: Actually, I was a wonderful father.

Indiana Jones: When?

Professor Henry Jones: Did I ever tell you to eat up? Go to bed? Wash your ears? Do your homework? No. I respected your privacy and I taught you self- reliance.

Indiana Jones: What you taught me was that I was less important to you than people who had been dead for five hundred years in another country. And I learned it so well that we've hardly spoken for twenty years.

Professor Henry Jones: You left just when you were becoming interesting.

Professor Henry Jones: [to Indy] Well, I didn't trust her. Why did you?

Walter Donovan: Because he didn't take my advice. Didn't I tell you not to trust anyone, Dr. Jones?

Young Indy: [bursts into his father's study] Dad...!

Professor Henry Jones: Out.

Young Indy: I have to show you something!

Professor Henry Jones: It can wait. Count to twenty.

Young Indy: No, Dad, I-!

Professor Henry Jones: Junior!

Young Indy: One, two, three, f...

Professor Henry Jones: In Greek.

Young Indy: [rolls his eyes] Ana, theo, thea...