Porter Collins Quotes in The Big Short (2015)

Mark Baum: I don't get it. Why are they confessing?

Danny Moses: They're not confessing.

Porter Collins: They're bragging.

Mortgage Broker: So, is Morgan Stanley recruiting us? Is that...

Porter Collins: Oh, no. No. The bank owns our hedge fund but we're not really a part of it. We invest in financial service companies and we're trying to understand the residential mortgage business.

Mark Baum: How many loans do you write each month?

Mortgage Broker: Pffft! About sixty.

Mark Baum: What was it four years ago?

Mortgage Broker: Ten... maybe fifteen.

Mortgage Broker: Yeah, I was a bartender. Now I own a boat.

Danny Moses: You own a boat? So how many of these are, uh, adjustable rate mortgages?

Mortgage Broker: Well, most. Yeah, I'd say about ninety percent. The bonuses on those skyrocketed a few years ago. Adjustables are our bread and honey.

Danny Moses: So do applicants ever get rejected?

Mortgage Broker: [laughs] Seriously? Look, if they get rejected, I suck at my job.

Danny Moses: Even if they have no money?

Mortgage Broker: Well, my firm offers NINJA loans - no income, no job. I just leave the income section blank if I want. Corporate doesn't care. These people just want homes, you know, and they just go with the flow.

Danny Moses: Good for you.

Mark Baum: Your companies don't verify?

Mortgage Broker: If I write a loan on Friday afternoon, big bank will buy it by Monday lunch.

Mortgage Broker: Trust me, I'm not driving a 7-series without strippers. No one on the pole has good credit, and they're ALL cash-rich.

Porter Collins: Yeah, I think I read Warren Buffett say something like that in an article.

Mortgage Broker: Who's Warren Buffett?

Jared Vennett: You smell that? What is that?

Mark Baum: What?

Jared Vennett: What's that smell?

Vinnie Daniel: Your cologne?

Jared Vennett: No.

[pause and looks to his assistant]

Jared's Assistant (Chris): Opportunity.

Jared Vennett: No. Money.

Porter Collins: Ooh...

Jared Vennett: I smell money.