Philip Marlowe Quotes in The Long Goodbye (1973)


Philip Marlowe Quotes:

  • Philip Marlowe: Nobody cares but me.

    Terry Lennox: Well that's you, Marlowe. You'll never learn, you're a born loser.

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, I even lost my cat.

  • Philip Marlowe: Excuse me, I don't see any Courry Brand cat food here.

    Supermarket clerk: Some what?

    Philip Marlowe: Some Courry Brand cat...

    Supermarket clerk: Could you spell that?

    Philip Marlowe: Courry Brand, C-O-U-R-R...

    Supermarket clerk: Oh, we're all out of that. Why don't you get this. All this shit is the same anyways.

    Philip Marlowe: You don't happen to have a cat by any chance?

    Supermarket clerk: What do I need a cat for, I've got a girl.

    Philip Marlowe: Ha, ha. He's got a girl, I got a cat.

  • [Repeated Line]

    Philip Marlowe: It's okay with me.

  • Roger Wade aka Billy Joe Smith: What'll you have?

    Philip Marlowe: What are you drinking?

    Roger Wade aka Billy Joe Smith: What I'm drinking is called Aquavit.

    Philip Marlowe: I'm drinking what you're drinking.

    Roger Wade aka Billy Joe Smith: Well God bless you. I like to hear that. People these days go, "Oh, I want a little of this. Oh, and a little of that and a twist of lemmon." Balls!

  • Marty Augustine: Your friend was a murderer and a thief.

    Philip Marlowe: That's a lie. I know he didn't kill her.

    Marty Augustine: Let me tell you something else. It's a minor crime, to kill your wife. The major crime is that he stole my money. Your friend stole my money, and the penalty for that is capital punishment.

  • Roger Wade aka Billy Joe Smith: Do you ever think about suicide, Marlboro?

    Philip Marlowe: Me, I don't believe in it.

  • Det. Green: My, my, you are a pretty asshole.

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, my mother always tells me that.

  • Marty Augustine: I didn't have any pubic hair until I was 15 years old.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh yeah, you must have looked like one of the Three Little Pigs.

  • Philip Marlowe: Who were the three DiMaggio brothers?

    Terry Lennox: Vince, Dom, and, uh, Joe?

    Philip Marlowe: Joltin' Joe, yeah.

  • Roger Wade aka Billy Joe Smith: I tell you what we're gonna do, Marlboro. You're gonna take that goddamn J.C. Penney tie off and we're gonna have an old fashioned man to man drinking party.

    Philip Marlowe: Well, that's okay but I'm not taking off the tie.

  • [Augustine has found a $5000 bill in Marlowe's pocket]

    Marty Augustine: What's that?

    Philip Marlowe: A picture of James Madison.

    Marty Augustine: It's a $5000 bill.

    Philip Marlowe: I know.

    Marty Augustine: Where'd you get this?

    Philip Marlowe: A box of crackerjacks, came as a prize.

  • [repeated line]

    Philip Marlowe: That's OK with me.

  • Dr. Verringer: I apologize for this intrusion, Mrs. Wade, but your husband dislikes paying his bills. I'm sorry; in future I must refuse to accept him as a patient.

    Philip Marlowe: Well we don't accept you as a doctor, quack.

  • Philip Marlowe: Listen Harry, in case you lose me in traffic, this is the address where I'm going. You look great.

    Harry: Thank you.

    Philip Marlowe: I'd straighten your tie a little bit. Harry, I'm proud to have you following me.

  • Eileen Wade: Listen, would you like something to eat?

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, I guess if you've got some cold bologna, mayonnaise and bread I'll hang around for a while.

  • Dave aka Socrates: [rambling from his prison cell] "Possession" is what you get in here now. Possession of noses, possession of gonads, possession of life. It's a weird world. Listen, some day, some day, all the pigs are gonna be in here, and the people are gonna be out there.

    Philip Marlowe: You can bet on that. Listen Dave, remember, you're not in here, it's just your body.

  • Det. Green: Your name Marlowe?

    Philip Marlowe: No, my name is Sidney, uh, Jenkins.

    Det. Green: Come on inside, Marlowe, we want to talk to you.

  • Detective: Listen - what are you here for, Marlowe?

    Philip Marlowe: [smearing fingerprint ink under his eyes] Well I'm here 'cause I'm gettin' ready for the big game Saturday. You know, we're playing Notre Dame and I hope I catch a touchdown pass.

  • Philip Marlowe: [Riley is playing Williams and Mercer's "The Long Goodbye" on the piano] You practicing for the Hit Parade?

    Riley: Gotta learn this goddamn thing... he thinks it'll beef up the lunch trade.

    Philip Marlowe: [surveying the empty bar] Yeah, I don't see anybody waitin' on line.

    Riley: As cheap as I work, he cannot lose.

  • Rigby Reardon: [picking up the phone] Juliet?

    Philip Marlowe: This is Alan.

    Rigby Reardon: Alan? Come on, Marlowe, no games.

    Philip Marlowe: I never could fool you, could I?

  • Philip Marlowe: Can you get a map of South America?

    Rigby Reardon: Yeah. You got something?

    Philip Marlowe: Look up Peru.

    Rigby Reardon: Got it!

    Philip Marlowe: There's a little town on the coast called Paita. Tell me where it is.

    Rigby Reardon: It's right next to a tiny island called - son of a gun! Carlotta! Damn. It's not a woman's name, it's a place.

  • Rigby Reardon: Hello, Marlowe. Dammit. You didn't do what I told ya. I hate that dumb way of wearing your shirt buttoned with no tie. Let me get you a tie.

    [grabs a tie]

    Rigby Reardon: Here. This one's blue, but you can wear it with brown.

    Philip Marlowe: You annoy me.

    Rigby Reardon: I annoy you? You come in here with no tie... Are you drunk? How many have you had?

    Philip Marlowe: One martini.

  • Rigby Reardon: [on the phone with Marlowe] You wearing a tie?

    Philip Marlowe: Goodbye.

  • Philip Marlowe: She tried to sit in my lap while I was standing up.

  • Philip Marlowe: My, my, my! Such a lot of guns around town and so few brains! You know, you're the second guy I've met today that seems to think a gat in the hand means the world by the tail.

  • Eddie Mars: Convenient, the door being open when you didn't have a key, eh?

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, wasn't it. By the way, how'd you happen to have one?

    Eddie Mars: Is that any of your business?

    Philip Marlowe: I could make it my business.

    Eddie Mars: I could make your business mine.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh, you wouldn't like it. The pay's too small.

  • Carmen Sternwood: You're not very tall are you?

    Philip Marlowe: Well, I, uh, I try to be.

  • General Sternwood: How do you like your brandy, sir?

    Philip Marlowe: In a glass.

  • Carmen Sternwood: Is he as cute as you are?

    Philip Marlowe: Nobody is.

  • Taxi Driver: If you can use me again sometime, call this number.

    Philip Marlowe: Day and night?

    Taxi Driver: Uh, night's better. I work during the day.

  • Vivian: You've forgotten one thing - me.

    Philip Marlowe: What's wrong with you?

    Vivian: Nothing you can't fix.

    [last lines]

  • Vivian: What will your first step be?

    Philip Marlowe: The usual one.

    Vivian: I didn't know there was a usual one.

    Philip Marlowe: Well, sure there is. It comes complete with diagrams on page 47 of 'How to be a Detective in 10 Easy Lessons' correspondent school textbook and, uh, your father offered me a drink.

    Vivian: You must've read another one on how to be a comedian.

  • Carmen Sternwood: You're cute.

    Philip Marlowe: I'm getting cuter every minute.

  • Vivian: So you're a private detective. I didn't know they existed, except in books, or else they were greasy little men snooping around hotel corridors. My, you're a mess, aren't you?

    Philip Marlowe: I'm not very tall either. Next time I'll come on stilts wear a white tie and carry a tennis racket.

    Vivian: I doubt if even that will help.

  • General Sternwood: Do you like orchids?

    Philip Marlowe: Not particularly.

    General Sternwood: Ugh. Nasty things. Their flesh is too much like the flesh of men, and their perfume has the rotten sweetness of corruption.

  • Norris: Are you attempting to tell me my duties, sir?

    Philip Marlowe: No, just having fun trying to guess what they are.

  • Carmen Sternwood: You're cute. I like you.

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, what you sees nothing, I got a Balinese dancing girl tattooed across my chest.

  • Philip Marlowe: Get up, angel, you look like a Pekingese.

  • [making a prank phone call]

    Philip Marlowe: What can I do for you? I can do what? Where? Oh, no, I wouldn't like that. Neither would my daughter.

  • Agnes Lowzier: A half-smart guy, that's what I always draw. Never once a man who's smart all the way around the course. Never once.

    Philip Marlowe: I hurt you much, sugar?

    Agnes Lowzier: You and every other man I've ever met.

  • Philip Marlowe: Oh, Eddie, you don't have anybody watching me, do you? Tailing me in a gray Plymouth coupe, maybe?

    Eddie Mars: No, why should I?

    Philip Marlowe: Well, I can't imagine, unless you're worried about where I am all the time.

    Eddie Mars: I don't like you that well.

  • Philip Marlowe: Thanks for the drink, General.

    General Sternwood: I enjoyed your drink as much as you did, sir.

  • Philip Marlowe: Did I hurt you much, sugar?

    Agnes Lowzier: You and every other man I've ever met.

  • Philip Marlowe: How'd you happen to pick out this place?

    Vivian: Maybe I wanted to hold your hand.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh, that can be arranged.

  • Philip Marlowe: You made a mistake. Mrs. Rutledge didn't want to see me.

    Norris: I'm sorry, sir. I make many mistakes.

  • Philip Marlowe: Hmm.

    General Sternwood: What does that mean?

    Philip Marlowe: It means, hmm.

  • Vivian: Do you always think you can handle people like, uh, trained seals?

    Philip Marlowe: Uh-huh. I usually get away with it too.

    Vivian: How nice for you.

  • [in a bookstore]

    Philip Marlowe: You do sell books, hmm?

    Agnes Lowzier: What do those look like, grapefruit?

    Philip Marlowe: Well, from here they look like books.

  • Philip Marlowe: You the guy that's been tailing me?

    Harry Jones: Yeah, the name's Jones. Harry Jones. I want to see you.

    Philip Marlowe: Swell. Did you want to see those guys jump me?

    Harry Jones: I didn't care one way or the other.

    Philip Marlowe: You could've yelled for help.

    Harry Jones: If a guy's playing a hand, I let him play it. I'm no kibitzer.

    Philip Marlowe: You got brains.

  • Agnes Lowzier: Is Harry there?

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, yeah, he's here.

    Agnes Lowzier: Put him on, will you?

    Philip Marlowe: He can't talk to you.

    Agnes Lowzier: Why?

    Philip Marlowe: Because he's dead.

  • Agnes Lowzier: Well, so long, copper. Wish me luck. I got a raw deal.

    Philip Marlowe: Hey, your kind always does.

  • Philip Marlowe: Somebody's always giving me guns.

  • Philip Marlowe: [after Carmen had thrown herself at him] You ought to wean her, she's old enough.

  • Philip Marlowe: Don't you know any better than to wake a man up at two o'clock in the afternoon?

  • Philip Marlowe: I know he was a good man at whatever he did. No one was more pleased than I when I heard you had taken him on as your... whatever he was.

  • Philip Marlowe: I can do what? Where? Oh no, I wouldn't like that. Neither would my daughter.

    [hangs up]

    Philip Marlowe: I hope the sergeant never traces that call.

  • Eddie Mars: Your story didn't sound quite right.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh, that's too bad. You got a better one?

    Eddie Mars: Maybe I can find one.

  • Philip Marlowe: Let me do the talking, angel. I don't know yet what I'm going to tell them. It'll be pretty close to the truth.

  • Philip Marlowe: I collect blondes and bottles too.

  • Philip Marlowe: How bout a cup of coffee, Bernie?

    Chief Inspector Bernie Ohls: Unh-uhh. I can't afford to be seen with you.

  • General Sternwood: You knew him too?

    Philip Marlowe: Yes, in the old days, when he used to run rum out of Mexico and I was on the other side. We used to swap shots between drinks, or drinks between shots, whichever you like.

    General Sternwood: My respects to you, sir. Few men ever swapped more than one shot with Sean Regan.

  • Philip Marlowe: You wanna tell me now?

    Vivian: Tell you what?

    Philip Marlowe: What it is you're trying to find out. You know, it's a funny thing. You're trying to find out what your father hired me to find out, and I'm trying to find out why you want to find out.

    Vivian: You could go on forever, couldn't you? Anyway it'll give us something to talk about next time we meet.

    Philip Marlowe: Among other things.

  • Philip Marlowe: [speaking into the phone] Bernie? This is Marlowe. I got some more red points for you.

    Chief Inspector Bernie Ohls: Who is it this time?

  • Philip Marlowe: [speaking into the phone] Hello, let me talk to Mr. Mars.

    Eddie Mars: This is Mars.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh, hello, Eddie. This is Marlowe.

    Eddie Mars: Marlowe?

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, Marlowe. Or, what's left of him.

  • Vivian: [Vivian is leaving Mr. Marlowe's office] "Good-bye, Mr Marlowe."

    Philip Marlowe: [When Vivian tries to open the door the deadbolt is locked] "Well, it wasn't intentional."

    Vivian: [Vivian unlocks the deadbolt, turns and smiles] "Try it sometime."

    [Vivian leaves and closes the door behind her]

  • Lt. Nulty: [during an interrogation] All right, Marlowe, let's start again, huh? From the beginning.

    Philip Marlowe: I've told you twice. Now, why don't I make it easy on all of us and tell you what you want to hear? This fairy hired me to exchange a necklace for cash for a friend of his. We drove out to the woods. I shot him. I buried the fifteen grand. I drove my car back to his place, walked *fifteen miles* back to the woods, knocked myself on the head and then called the police.

  • Philip Marlowe: [voiceover] The house itself wasn't much. It was smaller than Buckingham Palace and probably had fewer windows than the Chrysler building.

  • Philip Marlowe: [voiceover] She gave me a smile I could feel in my hip pocket.

  • Philip Marlowe: [voiceover] I sparred with the night clerk for a couple of minutes, but it was like trying to open a sardine can after you broke off the metal lip. There was something about Abraham Lincoln's picture that loosened him up.

  • Philip Marlowe: [opening lines] This past spring was the first that I felt tired and realized I was growing old. Maybe it was the rotten weather we'd had in L.A. Maybe the rotten cases I'd had. Mostly chasing a few missing husbands and then chasing their wives once I found them, in order to get paid. Or maybe it was just the plain fact that I am tired and growing old.

  • Philip Marlowe: [looking at the dead bodies of Moose and Velma] Moose never would have hurt her. It didn't matter to him that she hadn't written in 6 years. It didn't matter that she turned him in for a reward. The big lug loved her... and if he was still alive... it wouldn't matter to him that she'd pumped 3 bullets into him... What a world.

  • Philip Marlowe: [answering door] Yeah?

    Lt. Nulty: It's Snow White!

    Philip Marlowe: With or without the dwarfs?

    Lt. Nulty: Without!

  • Philip Marlowe: What was she like... this Velma?

    Moose Malloy: Cute... cute as lace pants.

  • Philip Marlowe: [voiceover, to himself] You've been beaten up, slapped, shot full of hop until you were as crazy as two waltzing mice; now let's see you do something really tough, like getting up.

  • Detective #1: We found your card on his body.

    Philip Marlowe: They give 'em out with bubblegum.

  • Philip Marlowe: [of several unidentified thugs' bodies] I'll bet you five dollars you can't find a state they're not wanted in.

  • [last lines]

    Philip Marlowe: [voiceover] I had two grand inside my breast pocket that needed a home - and I knew just the place.

  • Frances Amthor: I think you're a very stupid person. You look stupid, you're in a stupid business, and you're on a stupid case.

    Philip Marlowe: I get it. I'm stupid.

  • Mother: [Philip Marlowe is escorting a fifteen year-old runaway girl from a dance hall to her parents' waiting limousine] Do you realize we had to give up a marvelous dinner party and drive all the way down here from Carmel to pick you up?

    Philip Marlowe: Look, can't you settle that on the way home? Right now there's the small matter of twenty five dollars plus five dollars in expense money.

    Mother: Pay the man, Charles. And give him a tip.

    Philip Marlowe: I don't accept tips for finding kids. Pets, yes. Five dollars for dogs and cats; ten dollars for elephants...

    Mother: [to her daughter] Get in the car.

    [Girl turns to Marlowe, knees him in the groin, and jumps in the car]

  • Philip Marlowe: It's a good thing you don't get out of the slammer more than once every seven years!

  • Philip Marlowe: This car sticks out like spats at an Iowa picnic.

  • Philip Marlowe: [on being shaken by the lapels] Now wait a minute. I've been slapped, scratched, punched, knocked unconscious, drugged, and shot at, looking for your Velma, so quit trying to make a milkshake out of my insides, will you?

  • Philip Marlowe: It was one of those transient motels, something between a fleabag and a dive.

  • Moose Malloy: You a private Dick?

    Philip Marlowe: No. I'm your fairy godmother.

  • [last lines]

    Philip Marlowe: I had two grand inside my brast pocket that needed a home, and I knew just the place.

  • Philip Marlowe: Philip Marlowe

    [voiceover, to himself, locked in a room, waking from hallucinations after being drugged by Frances Amthor]

    Philip Marlowe: ... The room was full of smoke... The smoke hung straight up in the air in thin lines; straight up and down, like a curtain of small clear beads. It didn't dissolve; didn't float off; didn't move... It was a grey web woven by a thousand spiders... I wondered how they'd got them to work together... Okay, Marlowe, I said. You're a tough guy. Six feet of iron man; one hundred and ninety pounds stripped and with your face washed; hard muscles and no glass jaw - you can take it. You been sat down twice; you been shot full of hop, and kept under it until you was crazy as two waltzing mice... And what does all that amount to? Routine. Now, let's see you do something *really* tough... like gettin' up... I crawled along the floor thinking... 'How the hell can I get under that door?'... I sensed somebody else in the room...

    [lights his Zippo]

    Philip Marlowe: I wished it was part of my nightmare, but it wasn't. It was Tommy Ray. He'd never blow another horn... I was torn between making myself walk, and wanting to lie down on the bed. It was a lovely bed. It was made of rose leaves... It was the most beautiful bed in the world. They had got it from Carole Lombard. It was too soft for her. I was still fighting it though. Still walking. When some footsteps I heard made up my mind for me. I had to get back into bed like it or not. I decided to play dead. I didn't have to be a hell of an actor.

  • Philip Marlowe: She was a charming middle-aged lady with a face like a bucket of mud. I gave her a drink. She was a gal who'd take a drink, if she had to knock you down to get the bottle.

  • Lt. Randall: Let's get it on the record... from the beginning.

    Philip Marlowe: With Malloy, then. Oh, it was about seven o'clock. Anyway it was dark.

    Lt. Randall: What were you doing at the office that late?

    Philip Marlowe: I'm a homing pigeon. I always come back to the stinking coop, no matter how late it is. I'd been out peeking under old Sunday sections for a barber named Dominick whose wife wanted him back - I forget why. Only reason I took the job was because my bank account was trying to crawl under a duck.

  • Philip Marlowe: "'Okay Marlowe,' I said to myself. 'You're a tough guy. You've been sapped twice, choked, beaten silly with a gun, shot in the arm until you're crazy as a couple of waltzing mice. Now let's see you do something really tough - like putting your pants on.'"

  • Philip Marlowe: I caught the blackjack right behind my ear. A black pool opened up at my feet. I dived in. It had no bottom. I felt pretty good - like an amputated leg.

  • Philip Marlowe: It was a nice little front yard. Cozy, okay for the average family. Only you'd need a compass to go to the mailbox. The house was all right, too, but it wasn't as big as Buckingham Palace.

  • Philip Marlowe: [about his gun] That's just part of my clothes. I hardly ever shoot anybody with it.

  • Philip Marlowe: Now this is beginning to make sense, in a screwy sort of a way. I get dragged in and get money shoved at me. I get pushed out and get money shoved at me. Everybody pushes me in, everybody pushes me out. Nobody wants me to DO anything. Okay, put a check in the mail. I cost a lot not to do anything. I get restless. Throw in a trip to Mexico.

  • Lindsay Marriott: I'm afraid I don't like your manner.

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, I've had complaints about it, but it keeps getting worse.

  • Ann Grayle: You know, I think you're nuts. You go barging around without a very clear idea of what you're doing. Everybody bats you down, smacks you over the head, fills you full of stuff... and you keep right on hitting between tackle and end. I don't think you even know which SIDE you're on.

    Philip Marlowe: I don't know which side anybody's on. I don't even know who's playing today.

  • Helen Grayle: I find men *very* attractive.

    Philip Marlowe: I imagine they meet you halfway.

  • Philip Marlowe: [about Moose Malloy] I tried to picture him in love with somebody, but it didn't work.

  • Helen Grayle: I hadn't supposed there were enough murders these days to make detecting very attractive to a young man.

    Philip Marlowe: I stir up trouble on the side.

  • Helen Grayle: [after Mr. Grayle takes Marlowe's gun] You know, this'll be the first time I've ever killed anyone I knew so little and liked so well. What's your first name?

    Philip Marlowe: Philip, for short.

    Helen Grayle: Philip. Philip Marlowe... named for a duke. You're just a nice mug. I've got a name for a duchess: Mrs. Leuwen Lockridge Grayle. Just a couple of mugs - we could have got along.

  • Lt. Randall: [during an interrogation] How do you feel?

    Philip Marlowe: Like a duck in a shooting gallery.

  • Philip Marlowe: He died in 1940, in the middle of a glass of beer. His wife Jessie finished it for him.

  • Philip Marlowe: What were you saying?

    Dr. Sonderborg: I made no remark.

    Philip Marlowe: Remarks want you to make them. They got their tongues hanging out waiting to be said.

  • Lindsay Marriott: How would you like a swift punch on the nose?

    Philip Marlowe: I tremble at the thought of such violence.

  • Philip Marlowe: My throat felt sore, but the fingers feeling it didn't feel anything. They were just a bunch of bananas that looked like fingers.

  • Philip Marlowe: She had more than a figure too. Not a beautiful face, but a good face. She had a face like a Sunday School picnic. You have any idea what kind of face that is, Nulty?

    Detective Nulty: I wouldn't know.

  • Philip Marlowe: He was doubled up on his face in that bag-of-old-clothes position that always means the same thing: he had been killed by an amateur. Or, by somebody who wanted it to look like an amateur job. Nobody else would hit a man that many times with a sap.

  • Helen Grayle: It's a long story and not pretty.

    Philip Marlowe: I got lots of time and I'm not squeamish.

  • Philip Marlowe: My feet hurt. And my mind felt like a plumbers handkerchief.

  • Philip Marlowe: Either book me, or let me go home and go to bed.

  • Philip Marlowe: Skip the water. Make that one with scotch. It'll save time.

  • Philip Marlowe: I don't know what you talked him into. Was it murder or something serious?

  • [Moose has taken Marlowe to Florian's to look for Velma]

    Philip Marlowe: I tried to picture him in love with somebody, but it didn't work.

    Moose Malloy: They changed it a lot. There was a stage where she worked... and some booths... pink flowers was in the slatwork. She was cute as lace pants.

  • Philip Marlowe: That's what happens when you let a cop go to college. He gets too smart.

  • Charlotte Sternwood: [when Marlowe declines to blackmail her] Wha-? You don't want money?

    Philip Marlowe: Oh sure. All I itch for is money. I'm so greedy that for fifty pounds a day plus expenses on the day I work, I risk my future, the hatred of the cops, of Eddie Mars and his pals, I dodge bullets and put up with slaps and say "Thank you very much. If you have any further trouble please call me: I'll just put my card here on the table." I do all that for a few pounds. And maybe just a little bit to protect what little pride a sick and broken old man has in his family, so that he can believe his blood is not poisoned. That his little girls - though they may be a trifle wild - are not perverts and killers.

  • Philip Marlowe: What did it matter where you lay once you were dead? In a stagnant lake or in a marble tower on the top of a high hill? You were dead, you were sleeping the big sleep, you were not bothered by things like that. Oil and water were the same as wind and air to you. You just slept the big sleep, not caring about the nastiness of how you died or where you fell. Me, I was part of the nastiness now. Far more a part of it than Rusty Regan was. But the old man didn't have to be. He could lie quiet in his canopied bed, with his bloodless hands folded on the sheet, waiting. His heart was a brief, uncertain murmur. His thoughts were as gray as ashes. And in a little while he too, like Rusty Regan, would be sleeping the big sleep.

  • Philip Marlowe: [of Mrs. Regan] She'd make a jazzy weekend, but she'd be a bit wearing for a steady diet.

  • Philip Marlowe: So many guns lately; so few brains.

  • Philip Marlowe: Such a lot of guns around town and so few brains!

  • Thug: Car.

    Philip Marlowe: Beep, beep.

    [Marlowe tries to walk away, but is blocked by the Thug]

    Thug: Car.

    Philip Marlowe: For a guy with a limited vocabulary, you sure do manage to get your point across.

  • Winslow Wong: May I reach for my pocket?

    Philip Marlowe: It would give me great pleasure to see you do something foolish.

  • Philip Marlowe: You know where I can find Mavis?

    Dolores Gonzáles: Mavis?

    Philip Marlowe: She's not over at her place.

    Dolores Gonzáles: Why should I turn you over to her?

    Philip Marlowe: Because underneath the pasties is a size 40 heart.

    [Dolores rolls her eyes]

    Philip Marlowe: I thought you liked Mavis.

    Dolores Gonzáles: I do like her, but why should she get all of the goodies?

  • Philip Marlowe: You're light on your feet, Winslow. Are you just a little gay, huh?

  • Philip Marlowe: I like a man that uses good grammar. You impress me mister Wong. Whom sent you?

  • Philip Marlowe: You're so good, Miss Wald. You're so good you could act your way out of a safety deposit box.

  • Philip Marlowe: [after a goon has just ripped up his jacket] Does your mother know what you do for a living?

  • Mavis Wald: [pulling a gun on Marlowe] Turn around.

    Philip Marlowe: If that were a .45, I wouldn't argue. But a .32, I can get in a couple of words.

    [Mavis raises the gun higher]

    Philip Marlowe: I've said them all... But don't forget you're a lady.

  • Dolores Gonzáles: I'm Dolores... with an 'O.' Dolores Gonzáles.

    Philip Marlowe: Isn't that Spanish for pain?

  • Philip Marlowe: [with a gun held on him] I like your perfume. What is it?

  • Philip Marlowe: Well, you're very impressive, Winslow, but I've seen dogs do better on television.

  • Lt. Christy French: Were you here when he got it?

    Philip Marlowe: No.

    Lt. Christy French: Who was?

    Philip Marlowe: He was.

  • Philip Marlowe: You take this back to your... Leader, Mr. Wong. Tell him you met the last of a dying dynasty - King of the Fools: unassailably virtuous, invariably broke.

  • [first lines]

    Philip Marlowe: How do I get in to see the manager?

    [the man he's talking to points him in the right direction]

    Philip Marlowe: Thank you.

  • Derris Kingsby: Mr. Marlowe, may I speak to you?

    Philip Marlowe: Why not? Everybody's been speaking to me.

  • Adrienne Fromsett: We get hundreds of authentic cases submitted to us every week.

    Philip Marlowe: Why don't you print a few?

    Adrienne Fromsett: They aren't all as emotional as yours.

  • Derris Kingsby: You want the facts, don't you?

    Philip Marlowe: When it comes to women, does anybody really want the facts?

  • Adrienne Fromsett: [Marlowe's story] That wasn't for nothing.

    Philip Marlowe: No, it was for five hundred bucks, and you got a little piece of my soul, along with my services.

  • Adrienne Fromsett: [Adrienne pitches Marlowe's story to publisher Derace Kingsby] And he's a very well-known private detective. That's what makes the stuff so authentic. So full of life and vigor and heart. So full of... what would you say it was full of, Mr. Marlowe?

    Philip Marlowe: Short sentences.

  • Adrienne Fromsett: How d'you get back from the lake so soon?

    Philip Marlowe: Fast dog team.

  • [Opening lines]

    Philip Marlowe: My name is Marlowe, Philip Marlowe. Occupation: private detective. You know, somebody says, "Follow that guy", so I follow him. Somebody says, "Find that female", so I find her. And what do I get out of it? $10 a day and expenses. And if you think that buys a lot of fancy groceries these days, you're crazy.

  • [Talking to the audience]

    Philip Marlowe: I was tired of being pushed around for nickels and dimes so I decided I'd write about murder. It's safer and besides, they tell me the profits are good.

  • [Talking to the audience]

    Philip Marlowe: You know, some cases of murder start when that door there behind you opens up and a fellow rushes in all covered with sweat and confusion and fills you full of bad dope about the setup. But some cases, like this one, kind of creep up on you on their hands and knees and the first thing you know, you're in it up to your neck.

  • Philip Marlowe: You don't really want to buy my story, do you, Miss Fromsett?

    Adrienne Fromsett: I was about to offer you $200 for it.

    Philip Marlowe: Oh, no, you weren't. Why don't you quit being cute, Miss Fromsett? The real reason you had me up here is because you're looking for a smooth operator who keeps his mouth shut and when you read the story, you said, "Yeah, that's my boy. He's dumb, he's brave and he's cheap." Am I right?

    Adrienne Fromsett: Well, I was about to offer you a commission on a rather delicate and confidential matter...

    Philip Marlowe: Then why didn't you pick up the telephone and call me instead of all this Mickey Mouse about a story?

  • Adrienne Fromsett: What I want you to do is this: I want you to find Mr. Kingsby's wife without his knowing you're looking for her. She's run off with another man. She's a vicious woman - a liar, a cheat and a thief. She may even end up in the hands of the police. He's had 10 years...

    Philip Marlowe: Pardon me if I'm nosey, Miss Fromsett. What makes this any of your business?

    Adrienne Fromsett: I handle all of Mr. Kingsby's affairs. He wishes to divorce her. She must be found before she can be served with the papers.

    Philip Marlowe: [Snorts] Nice job you have here.

    Adrienne Fromsett: [Smiles] You think I'm pretty cold-blooded about this, don't you?

    Philip Marlowe: I'd have used a shorter word.

    Adrienne Fromsett: [In an indignant tone of voice] I don't like your manner.

    Philip Marlowe: I'm not selling it. I'm not selling the story, either, to you. I'm not selling anything. I have an allergy against getting mixed up with tricky females who want to knock off the boss's wife and marry him for themselves.

    Adrienne Fromsett: [Now seriously angry] People don't talk to me like that, Mr. Marlowe!

    Philip Marlowe: Maybe that's what's the matter with you. Somebody should talk to you like that sometime.

  • Adrienne Fromsett: I noticed you didn't do much talking while the boss was in the office, did you?

    Philip Marlowe: When I made a quick $300 by keeping quiet?

  • Adrienne Fromsett: Please don't be so difficult to get along with. I need help.

    Philip Marlowe: Like I need four thumbs.

  • Adrienne Fromsett: I wonder how it would be to discuss this over a couple of ice cubes. Would you care to try?

    Philip Marlowe: [laughs] Imagine *you* needing ice cubes.

  • Philip Marlowe: Where does Chris Lavery live?

    Adrienne Fromsett: Bay City.

    Philip Marlowe: Address?

    Adrienne Fromsett: 676 Altair Street. The edge of the canyon.

    Philip Marlowe: And you hope he throws me into it.

  • Philip Marlowe: [to Chris Lavery] I like your tan. That's very Christmassy.

  • Property Clerk: Name?

    Philip Marlowe: Phillip Marlowe.

    Lt. DeGarmot: You like our jail?

    Philip Marlowe: Fine.

    Lt. DeGarmot: When you came out of your blackout, you started slugging so I had to put you to sleep again.

    Philip Marlowe: Fine.

    Lt. DeGarmot: Did you sleep nice?

    Philip Marlowe: Fine.

    Lt. DeGarmot: Do you remember me at all?

    Philip Marlowe: Fine.

    Lt. DeGarmot: Don't you know any other words but "fine"?

    Philip Marlowe: The teeth I've got, I'd like to keep.

  • Lt. DeGarmot: [Referring to the story Marlowe wrote] "If I Should Die Before I Live" - that's not bad.

    Philip Marlowe: It might happen to you.

  • [first lines]

    Philip Marlowe: [narrating] I was sore at myself for coming all the way out to Pasadena on a day like that just to see about a case. And how I hate summer winds - they come in suddenly off the Mojave Desert and you can taste sand for a week. I knew it was the voice of the girl on the phone that had got me and I was reminding myself how often your ears play a dirty trick on your eyes - but this time there was no let down...

  • Merle Davis: Well, just having you here makes me sure everything's going to be all right.

    Philip Marlowe: You have even more confidence in my ability than I have. Where did you hear about me?

    Merle Davis: Oh, ah, I didn't. I just picked your name out of the phone book.

  • Philip Marlowe: If I take the case, will you be around?

    Merle Davis: That depends on you, Mr. Marlowe. You look like a man with initiative.

  • Leslie Murdock: You're Marlowe, aren't you? I've just seen my mother. I'm afraid we've put you to some slight trouble for nothing. She's decided she's not going to employ you or anyone for that matter. How much do I owe you?

    Philip Marlowe: Nothing, Mr. Murdock.

    Merle Davis: [to Marlowe] Mrs. Murdock will see you now.

    Philip Marlowe: Thanks.

    [to Leslie]

    Philip Marlowe: You must have forgotten to tell your mother.

  • Philip Marlowe: What's been taken?

    Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: A coin. A rare gold coin called the Brasher Doubloon.

    Philip Marlowe: The what?

    Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: The Brasher Doubloon. It's a collector's item worth at least 10,000 dollars, probably more. It's a mint specimen - there's only two of them in the country.

  • Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: Just a minute, Merle. You'd better write a check out for Mr. Marlowe. What do you charge for your services?

    Philip Marlowe: Well, if I take the case, 25 dollars a day, plus expenses.

    Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: I see. And how much of a retainer do you expect?

    Philip Marlowe: A hundred dollars will hold me.

    Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: I should hope it would!

  • [handing a check to Marlowe]

    Mrs. Elizabeth Murdock: There you are and I hope you're worth it. To tell you the truth, I was expecting an older man - more intelligent looking.

    Philip Marlowe: I'm wearing a disguise.

  • Philip Marlowe: [narrating] Rule 1 for private detectives: always deposit retainer before client changes mind.

  • Philip Marlowe: [narrating] The Florence Apartments was a rooming house on Bunker Hill which used to be the choice place to live in Los Angeles. Nowadays, people lived there because they haven't any choice.

  • Philip Marlowe: [narrating] How I hate to find a stiff. A private detective has to work within an area roughly bounded by the law. Murder squeezes that area down to where you either can't operate or you have to take chances 25 dollars aren't worth.

  • Police Lt. Breeze: You know somethin', Marlowe? You're smart - but don't try to be too smart.

    Philip Marlowe: All right - I'll try to be just smart enough.

  • Philip Marlowe: [to Merle] Now I know this is going to sound kind of radical, but did it ever occur to you that it might make things easier if you told the truth occasionally?

  • Philip Marlowe: [discussing the Brasher Doubloon] You can call the police and tell them I've got it and won't give it back to you... No police, eh? You know, I don't blame you. I don't like 'em either right now, 'cause they think I know more about those murders then I've told them. Is that your reason, too, Mrs. Murdock? And yours, Miss Davis?

  • Merle Davis: Would you like me to tell you why I came here?

    Philip Marlowe: Yeah, then I can concentrate on the real reason.

  • Philip Marlowe: How do you figure on getting me to give you the doubloon tonight?

    Merle Davis: By telling you the truth and then asking you for it.

    Philip Marlowe: You better go easy on that whiskey, Miss Davis. That sounded like a direct answer to a direct question.

  • Merle Davis: [pointing a gun at Marlowe] I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to take off your clothes.

    Philip Marlowe: [amused] Miss Davis!

  • [last lines]

    Philip Marlowe: [referring to the kissing 'lessons' he's been giving Merle] I've got a feeling you're going to graduate with honors.

Browse more character quotes from The Long Goodbye (1973)