Phil Cooper Quotes in The Big Kahuna (1999)

Phil Cooper: I'm saying you've already done plenty of things to regret, you just don't know what they are. It's when you discover them, when you see the folly in something you've done, and you wish that you had it do over, but you know you can't, because it's too late. So you pick that thing up, and carry it with you to remind you that life goes on, the world will spin without you, you really don't matter in the end. Then you will gain character, because honesty will reach out from inside and tattoo itself across your face.

Phil Cooper: It doesn't matter whether you're selling Jesus or Buddha or civil rights or 'How to Make Money in Real Estate With No Money Down.' That doesn't make you a human being; it makes you a marketing rep. If you want to talk to somebody honestly, as a human being, ask him about his kids. Find out what his dreams are - just to find out, for no other reason. Because as soon as you lay your hands on a conversation to steer it, it's not a conversation anymore; it's a pitch. And you're not a human being; you're a marketing rep.

[last lines]

Phil Cooper: [speaking on the phone] Hello?

[pause]

Phil Cooper: No, you, you just missed him.

[pause]

Phil Cooper: What's that?

[pause]

Phil Cooper: I love you too.

[pause]

Phil Cooper: Yeah.

Larry Mann: Do I strike you as a particularly religious man, Phil?

Phil Cooper: Not even the slightest.

Larry Mann: Then why am I seized with a sudden overwhelming desire to pray?

Phil Cooper: A man hasn't any idea what his soul looks like until he gazes into the eyes for the woman that he's married to. And then, if he's any kind of decent human being, he spends the next couple of days throwing up. Because no honest man can stand that image.

[first lines]

Phil Cooper: [voice-over] No answer.

Bob Walker: [voice-over] She must be out shopping.

Phil Cooper: [voice-over] God forbid.