Oscar Jaffe Quotes in Twentieth Century (1934)

Oscar Jaffe: I never thought I should sink so low as to become an actor.

Oscar Jaffe: She loves me. I could tell that through her screaming.

Oscar Jaffe: No cooperation from anybody. Never mind. I'll carry through alone.

Oscar Jaffe: Go on, Owen... tell her I'm dying... and DON'T OVERACT!

Oscar McGonigle: Who told her that her phone was tapped?

Oscar Jaffe: [seeing Oliver Webb trying to sneak away] Stay where you are, Judas Iscariot!

Oscar Jaffe: They are the only true actors we have left. Not like our cheap Broadway hams.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Yes, I tried to save you pain. I lied, yes, only to save you.

Oscar Jaffe: That's from "Sappho"!

Oscar Jaffe: I'm offering you a last chance to become immortal.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Then I've decided to stay mortal with responsible management.

Oscar Jaffe: You squalling litle amateur. On your feet! Get up! Take that hump out of your back. You're not demonstrating underwear anymore!

Oscar Jaffe: Did you hear that? She's left me.

Oliver Webb: Say the word, O.J., and I'll kill myself.

Oscar Jaffe: [looking at a poster with Lily Garland's picture on it] Anathema! Child of Satan!

Oscar Jaffe: You amoeba.

Max Jacobs: It's the truth, whether you know it or not.

Oscar Jaffe: Owen, take this creature who came to me as an office boy as Max Mendlebaum and who is now Max Jacobs for some mysterious reason and throw him into the street.

Oscar Jaffe: When I love a woman, I'm an Oriental. It never goes. It never dies.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Phooey.

Oscar Jaffe: Love blinded me. That was the trouble between us as producer and artist.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: So that's what it was, was it? How about your name in electric lights bigger than everybody's, and your delusion that you were a Shakespeare and a Napoleon and a Grand Lama of Tibet all rolled into one?

Oscar Jaffe: Those movies you were in! It's sacrilege throwing you away on things like that. When I left that movie house, I felt some magnificent ruby had been thrown into a platter of lard.

Oscar Jaffe: I want to send another

[telegram]

Oscar Jaffe: . To John Ringling. "I'm in the market for 25 camels, several elephants, and an ibis... Give me the rock-bottom price."

Oscar Jaffe: Owen, something tells me you're not educated enough for this sort of thing. I'll have to hire some professor.

Owen O'Malley: Save your dough, sire. I yield the lamp of learning to no one.

Oscar Jaffe: It's typical of my career that in the great crises of life, I should stand flanked by two incompetent alcoholics.

Mathew J. Clark: He had a gun! I shot him in self-defense!

Oscar Jaffe: Owen, I was aiming at myself. He grabbed the gun away from me and shot me. That's the final irony... Killed by a lunatic.

Oscar Jaffe: I close...

Oliver Webb: Yeah, yeah, I know - the iron door!

Oscar Jaffe: Now, before we begin I want you all to remember one thing. No matter what I may say... no matter what I may do on this stage during our work... I love you all.

Oscar Jaffe: There's a message I want to go with those gardenias: "To my little madonna of the snows... " No, wait a minute. We won't use that this time.

Oscar Jaffe: Lily, you're crying.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Sure, I turn on a faucet. It's that sort of scene.

Oscar Jaffe: [lamenting Lily's departure, after trashing her lobby posters] ... O tempora, o mores!

Oscar Jaffe: When I love a woman, I'm an Oriental. It never goes! It never dies!

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Phooey!

Oscar Jaffe: What do you know about talent? What do you know about the theatre? What do you know about genius? What do you know about anything, you... bookkeeper!

Oscar Jaffe: Get out of my theatre, you gray rat! And don't have that fat wife of yours come around again, pleading for you!

Oscar Jaffe: I'm offering you your last chance to become immortal.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Thanks, I've decided to stay mortal - with a responsible management!

Oscar Jaffe: Who?

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: Max Jacobs!

Oscar Jaffe: I can't believe it.

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: No? Read the papers tomorrow, then. Why do you think I left Hollywood?

Oscar Jaffe: Max Jacobs! He's a thief! Illiterate! He can hardly write his own name!

Lily Garland, aka Mildred Plotka: He writes it on checks, all right - great BIG checks, too!