Osbourne Cox Quotes in Burn After Reading (2008)


Osbourne Cox Quotes:

  • Osbourne Cox: I have a drinking problem? Fuck you, Peck, you're a Mormon. Compared to you we ALL have a drinking problem!

  • Osbourne Cox: If you ever carried out your proposed threat you would experience such a shitstorm of consequences my friend your empty little head would be spinning faster than the wheels of your Schwinn bicycle back there.

    Chad Feldheimer: [laughing] You think that's a Schwinn!

  • Osbourne Cox: No. No, I'm sorry, I don't know the number to, uh, my savings account because believe it or not I don't spend my entire day sitting around trying to memorize the fucking numbers to my fucking bank accounts! Moron!

  • [repeated line]

    Osbourne Cox: What the fuck...?

  • Osbourne Cox: And you're my wife's lover?

    Ted Treffon: [shaking his head] No.

    Osbourne Cox: Then what are you doing here?


    Osbourne Cox: I know you. You're the guy from the gym.

    Ted Treffon: I'm not here representing HardBodies.

    Osbourne Cox: Oh, yes. I know very well what you represent.


    Osbourne Cox: You represent the idiocy of today.

    Ted Treffon: No, I don't represent that either.

    Osbourne Cox: Yeah. You're the guy at the gym when I asked about that moronic woman.

    Ted Treffon: She's not a moron.

    Osbourne Cox: You're in league with that moronic woman. You are part of a league of morons.

    Ted Treffon: No. No.

    Osbourne Cox: Oh, yes. You see, you're one of the morons I've been fighting my whole life. My whole fucking life. But guess what... Today, I win.

    [gun shot]

  • Chad Feldheimer: Osbourne Cox?

    Osbourne Cox: Yes, this is Osbourne Cox, who the FUCK are YOU?

  • Osbourne Cox: Give me the CD!

    Chad Feldheimer: As soon as you give us the money, dickwad!

  • Osbourne Cox: Some clown, or two clowns, have gotten a hold of my memoirs.

    Katie Cox: Your what?

    Osbourne Cox: Stolen it, or I don't know...

    Katie Cox: Your what?

    Osbourne Cox: My memoirs, the book I'm writing.

    Katie Cox: Well why in God's name would anyone think that's worth anything?

  • Osbourne Cox: [on phone] Tell Dr. Cox I have the new keys!

    [Osbourne hangs up, and picks up a hatchet]

  • Osbourne Cox: We were young and committed and there was nothing we could not do. We thought of the Agency less... Um... The principles of George Kennan, a personal hero of mine, like the fabled Murrow's Boys, at a time of...

  • Harry Pfarrer: Twenty years of Marshal Service, I never discharged my gun.

    Osbourne Cox: That sounds like something you ought to be telling your psychologist.

  • Chad Feldheimer: Uh, O-Osbourne Cox?

    Osbourne Cox: Yes! Yes, it's - Hello! It's Osbourne Cox! Who the fuck are you? What documents are you talking about?

  • Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer: [first lines - greeting his arrival] Ozzie, come on in.

    Osbourne Cox: Palmer, what's up?

    Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer: Uh, you know, uh, Peck and Olson?

    Osbourne Cox: Peck yes, hi ya...

    Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer: Olson by reputation.

    Osbourne Cox: [to Olson] I'm Osbourne Cox.

    Olson: Yeah, I, mmm...

    Osbourne Cox: Aren't you with...

    Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer: Ya, that's right. Have a seat.

    Palmer DeBakey Smith, CIA Officer: Look Oz, look, there's no easy way to say this: We're taking you off the Balkans Desk.

  • Osbourne Cox: Lactose Reflux? Do you mean Lactose intolerance or Acid Reflux? They're two different things!

    Harry Pfarrer: This is cheese, so... Lactose intolerance.

    Osbourne Cox: So you misspoke.

Browse more character quotes from Burn After Reading (2008)