Olson Johnson Quotes in Blazing Saddles (1974)

[the Johnsons load their guns and point them at Bart. Bart then points his own pistol at his head]

Bart: [low voice] Hold it! Next man makes a move, the nigger gets it!

Olson Johnson: Hold it, men. He's not bluffing.

Dr. Sam Johnson: Listen to him, men. He's just crazy enough to do it!

Bart: [low voice] Drop it! Or I swear I'll blow this nigger's head all over this town!

Bart: [high-pitched voice] Oh, lo'dy, lo'd, he's desp'it! Do what he sayyyy, do what he sayyyy!

[Townspeople drop their guns. Bart jams the gun into his neck and drags himself through the crowd towards the station]

Harriet Johnson: Isn't anybody going to help that poor man?

Dr. Sam Johnson: Hush, Harriet! That's a sure way to get him killed!

Bart: [high-pitched voice] Oooh! He'p me, he'p me! Somebody he'p me! He'p me! He'p me! He'p me!

Bart: [low voice] Shut up!

[Bart places his hand over his own mouth, then drags himself through the door into his office]

Bart: Ooh, baby, you are so talented!

[looks into the camera]

Bart: And they are so *dumb*!

Olson Johnson: [after Gabby Johnson's speech] Now who can argue with that? I think we're all indebted to Gabby Johnson for clearly stating what needed to be said. I'm particulary glad that these lovely children were here today to hear that speech. Not only was it authentic frontier gibberish, it expressed a courage little seen in this day and age.

[townspeople murmur and nod in approval]

Olson Johnson: What are we made of? Our fathers came across the prairies, fought Indians, fought drought, fought locusts, fought Dix... remember when Richard Dix came in here and tried to take over this town? Well, we didn't give up then, and by gum, we're not going to give up now!

Reverend Johnson: Order, order. Goddamnit, I said "order".

Howard Johnson: Y'know, Nietzsche says: "Out of chaos comes order."

Olson Johnson: Oh, blow it out your ass, Howard.

Olson Johnson: All right... we'll give some land to the niggers and the chinks. But we don't want the Irish!

[everyone complains]

Olson Johnson: Aw, prairie shit... Everybody!

[everyone rejoices]

Olson Johnson: [in the bar discussing Pasteur's possible cure] Never mind that shit! Here comes Mongo!