Old Sophie Quotes in Howl's Moving Castle (2004)

Old Sophie: All right Calcifer, let's get cooking.

Calcifer: I don't cook! I'm a scary and powerful fire demon!

[Howl comes running out of the bathroom, screaming. His hair is now orange]

Howl: Sophie! You, you sabotaged me! Look! Look at what you've done to my hair! Look!

Old Sophie: What a pretty color.

Howl: It's hideous! You completely ruined my magic potions in the bathroom!

Old Sophie: I just organized things, Howl. Nothing's ruined.

Howl: Wrong! Wrong! I specifically ordered you not to get carried away!

[tragically]

Howl: Now I'm repulsive.

[slumps into a chair]

Howl: I can't live like this.

[starts sobbing, head in hands]

Old Sophie: Come on, it's not that bad.

[Howl's hair changes color to purple, then black]

Old Sophie: You should look at it now, its shade is even better.

Howl: [inconsolable] I give up. I see not point in living if I can't be beautiful.

Old Sophie: I wonder what Howl disguised himself as? Surely not a crow. Can't be a pigeon, he's too flamboyant for that.

[a glider plane with a giggling young woman and her lover flies overhead]

Old Sophie: That could be him.

Young Sophie: So you are going away. Please, Howl. I know I can be of help to you, even though I'm not pretty and all I'm good at is cleaning.

Howl: Sophie! Sophie! You're beautiful!

Old Sophie: Well, the nice thing about being old is you've got nothing much to lose.

Old Sophie: A battleship?

Howl: On its way to burn cities and people

Old Sophie: The enemy's? Ours?

Howl: What difference does it make?

Markl: Wait! You can't come up here!

Old Sophie: Whatever you don't want me to clean, better hide it now!

Markl: Save my room for last, OK?

Old Sophie: It was a pleasure meeting you, even if you are my least favorite vegetable! Take care, Turniphead!

Howl: The Witch of the Waste and Madame Sulliman's dog at my table? What possessed you to let them in my house

Calcifer: I didn't let them in here! Sophie crash landed her plane into my face!

Howl: [Laughs]

Old Sophie: Hmph!

Howl: I knew she'd make a great pilot!

Howl: So, what do you have in your pocket, Sophie?

Old Sophie: Huh?

[Finds a folded piece of paper]

Old Sophie: What is this?

Howl: Give it to me.

[paper burns leaving marks on the table]

Markl: Scorch marks! Howl, can you read them?

Howl: That is ancient sorcery and quite powerful too.

Markl: Is it from the Witch of the Waste?

Howl: "You who swallowed a falling star, o' heartless man, your heart shall soon be mine." That can't be good for the table.

[covers the marks with his hand]

Markl: Wow! It's gone!

Howl: The mark maybe gone but the spell is still there.

Howl: [Quietly amused] Calcifer? You're being so obedient.

Calcifer: Not on purpose! She bullied me!

Howl: Not just anybody can do that.

[Looks at Sophie]

Howl: And you are... who?

Old Sophie: Er, You can just call me Grandma Sophie. I'm your new cleaning lady. I just started work today.

Old Sophie: When you're old, all you want to do is stare at the scenery. It's so strange. I've never felt so peaceful before.

Old Sophie: Why do you get so cold when you're old? I'm fatter than ever and yet the wind blows right through me!

Old Sophie: What a dump. When I think of castles, it's not what I picture.

Old Sophie: I can't do this! Why'd you make me come here if you were coming yourself?

Howl: Knowing you'd be there gave me the courage to show up. That woman terrifies me. I can't face her on my own. You saved me, Sophie. I was in big trouble back there.

[in the secret garden]

Old Sophie: Did you use your magic to make this?

Howl: Only a little, just to help the flowers grow.

Old Sophie: Are you the one moving this castle?

Calcifer: Of course I am! No one else does any work around here.

Howl: The Witch of the Wastes is trying to find my castle.

Old Sophie: Ah, I saw her henchmen at the harbor.

Howl: I'm such a big coward, all I do is hide. All of this magic is to keep everybody away. I can't stand how scared I am.

Old Sophie: Do you know what Madame Suliman said? She said that Howl's heart was stolen by a demon. Tell me now, what do you know?

Calcifer: I'm so sorry but that would be confidential information.

Old Sophie: Howl, why is the Witch of the Wastes trying to hunt you down?

Howl: She was once quite beautiful, so I decided to pursue her, then I realized she wasn't, so then, as usual, I ran away.

Howl: I've got it! Why don't you go to the palace for me!

Old Sophie: Huh?

Howl: Just say that you're Pendragon's mother and that your son is such a cowardly wizard he's too afraid to show his face. Maybe then Madame Suliman will finally give up on me.

Markl: [reading the newspaper] But the newspaper says we won

Witch of the Waste: [while smoking a cigar] Only idiots believe what they read in the paper

Old Sophie: That's so strange I can't get Calcifer going!

[to the Witch of the Waste]

Old Sophie: Do you have to keep smoking that it smells terrible!

Witch of the Waste: Don't deny an old witch her pleasures young lady

Old Sophie: Markl will you crack a window please?

Witch of the Waste: [continues smoking] I wouldn't open that window if I were you dear, Calcifer's too weak right now to protect this place, Suliman's henchmen could get in.