Officer Greg Quotes in Postal (2007)


Officer Greg Quotes:

  • Officer Greg: [Officers Greg and John are held up in traffic with a Chinese woman in front of them as the light turns from green to yellow] Come on, bitch!

    [slams horn]

    Officer Greg: She could of made the fucking light, man.

    Officier John: Maybe she forgot her "glass".

    Officer Greg: [in disbelief] Did you say "glass"?

    Officier John: Yes.

    Officer Greg: Did you say "glass", you Frankfurt-eating motherfucker? I buy all those god damn English tapes for you to say fucking "glass"? It's GLASSES! Man, you fuckin' foreigners come over here, you fuck up the language, and THIS BITCH IS FUCKIN' UP THE TRAFFIC!

    Officier John: Calm down, Greg!

    Officer Greg: YOU fuckin' calm down! This flat-ass bitch comes over here, takes over the convenient stores, and they eat up all our god damn DOGS!

    Officier John: Go and help her. Come on.

    Officer Greg: [calms down] You're right... sorry, man... I'll just get out of the car and make sure she's doin' okay.

    [as he's stepping out]

    Officer Greg: She's an old lady... I feel bad now.

    [Greg approaches the car and the old lady begins to yell in a somewhat panicked matter]

    Officer Greg: Hey, the light is green.

    [the old lady is still yelling]

    Officer Greg: The light is green! You could of went through the light!

    [as the old lady is still yelling, Greg mishears one of her words as a racial slur]

    Officer Greg: What did you say?

    [raises shotgun]

    Officer Greg: What did you say, bitch?

    [then, Greg blows the old lady's brains out and walks back to the car]

    Officer Greg: Man...

    Officier John: What happened over there?

    Officer Greg: Bitch called me "nigger".

  • Officer Greg: Citizens of this great nation... town. Watch out for this psychopathic deranged killer also known as...

    Officier John: [whispers to Greg] Postal Dude.

    Officer Greg: Postal Dude.

    [mutters to John]

    Officer Greg: Is that the best you could come up with?

    [to crowd]

    Officer Greg: Postal Dude! He's wanted for kidnapping, a shootout at the social welfare office, the assassination of Candidate Wells...

    Officier John: [whispers to Greg] And the killing of a Chinese woman.

    Officer Greg: And he killed a poor, innocent, old Chinese lady. If you have seen him...

    Dude: Ever had one of those days?

    Mob Member: No.

    [looks at the Postal Dude]

    Mob Member: Hey! Hey! It's the Postal Dude!

    Dude: Get away!

    [runs away]

    Mob Member: [to the Mob] After him!

    Officer Greg: [looks at the Postal Dude's picture were he got long hair] No, that's not him. Do you see his hair at the sides? This guy looks like Jesus.

  • Officier John: Greg, I've been doing a lot of research about American Morality. I'm not sure you're doing the right thing with Harry here.

    Officer Greg: Harry? You know how I met Harry? Me and my dog were hiking in the hills and this fool comes riding down the hill on his bicycle, hits my dog, flies over the handlebars and breaks his neck.

    Officier John: So you took him to the hospital?

    Officer Greg: I took my dog to the hospital. Harry? I threw him in the truck and took him home. I mean the motherfucker almost killed my dog.

    Officier John: Hm...

    Officer Greg: Three days later I came back and Harry was still alive. We've been business-partners ever since. Oh, Harry, it's time to go to work.

  • Officer Greg: Oh oh, watch this. Say "Will work for food" in German.

    Harry the Wheelchair Guy: Uh...

    Officer Greg: You're the shit.

  • Officer Greg: You're under arrest!

  • Dude: Oh ho ho! It's the moo-cow from the welfare office!

    [imitating her]

    Dude: Sorry, we're closed... BITCH!

    [the Postal Dude runs her over and she gets thrown on the other side of the street where she gets hit by another car which throws her back where she gets hit by a police car which stops immediately]

    Officier John: What was that?

    Officer Greg: [gets out of the car and takes a look] I thought we had a flat... but we just ran over some girl. Whew, Thank God...

    [Takes out walkie-talkie]

    Officer Greg: I got a dead body on Maple...

    [When asked to repeat the location]

    Officer Greg: Maple, like the syrup.

Browse more character quotes from Postal (2007)