Nurse Quotes in Furious 6 (2013)

Nurse: Señor O'Conner, Señor O'Conner, hurry, come! Come! This way! This way!

Elena: [to Nurse] It's all right, I've got it.

[to Brian]

Elena: It's okay, you're just in time.

Dominic Toretto: You're gonna be a great father, Brian.

Brian O'Conner: What makes you so sure?

Dominic Toretto: Because I'll be there to kick your ass if you ain't. Get in there.

Elena: Go.

Dominic Toretto: Brian. Remember, the second you go through those doors, everything changes. Our old life is done.

[Brian nods]

Nurse: Dr. Nuhkbane, the guy with the stab wounds just died.

Dr. Nuhkbane: Oh dear.

Chris: Oh, Doctor, we're looking for our friend.

Dr. Nuhkbane: Your friend? Which one is he?

Chris: Um, he's the one with the stab wounds.

Dr. Nuhkbane: Oh dear.

Chris: What?

Dr. Nuhkbane: I'm sorry. Your friend is dead.

Sarah: Dead?

Daryl: Dead?

Chris: Dead?

[Chris faints]

Damian: What's that?

Nurse: Something to stop your heart.

Damian: What?

Nurse: Something to stop your heart!

Nurse: [taking Johnny's temperature which charges the electronic thermometer to 209 degrees] My God! You're hot!

Johnny Storm: Why, thank you. So are you.

Nurse: Johnny! You're on fire!

Johnny Storm: Thanks! You're pretty good too!

Nurse: [to Doctor Gordon and Doctor Simms] Suicide attempt. They just brought her down from County General.

Dr. Neil Gordon: What's her name.

Nurse: Kristen Parker. She was fine until we tried to sedate her!

Nurse: Mr. Bond, I need a urine sample. If you could fill this beaker for me?

James Bond: From here?

[Pushing "Dead Meat" through the hospital to emergency]

Doctor: Quick, nurse check his penis. See if it's longer than mine.

Nurse: [Unzips his pants] No, doctor.

Nurse: Oh my God! Terrorists!

Johnny C: Terror? I'll show you some freakin' terror! Get your ass up here, I'll jump-start it!

Nurse: [refering to a wounded patient] ICU, doctor?

Ryan Harrison: And I see you too, nurse.

[impersonating a doctor, Harrison looks at various patients in a hospital ER]

Ryan Harrison: [refering to a fat man] He's pregnant.

Paramedic #2: [refering to another patient] Doctor, this man has been shot five times!

Ryan Harrison: Put him in the 10 bullets or less line.

Paramedic: [refering to a pregnant woman in labor] Doctor, you may want to take a look at this.

Ryan Harrison: No thank you!

Ryan Harrison: [refering to another patient] This man's in cardiac arrest. Give him 200,000 cc's of adrenaline.

Nurse: But Doc...

Ryan Harrison: But what? Damn your butt! I said 200,000 cc's of adrenaline!

Ryan Harrison: [refering to another injured woman] Balance, rotate, and align the organs.

Nurse: Your bath's ready! The water's getting cold! Princess, he's a cobbler! Keep your eyes on your work, Cobbler!

Tack the Cobbler: Y-yes, ma'am.

Tack the Cobbler: [after Princess Yum-Yum and Nanny leave] Nothing wrong with being a Cobbler. Why can't I ever talk when it matters?

Nurse: [on the phone] Well somebody's pullin' your leg deary. No one dies on this floor unless they check in with me first. You can bet your liver I'll look into it!

[hangs up]

Nurse: Butch! Charlie! Let's go.

Butch: What the hell she up to now?

Charlie: Eh, she's gonna labotomize some poor sucker.

Butch: Who knows, in this loony bin anything can happen

Mac: Mr. Gutterman come out of recovery yet?

Nurse: Mr. Gutterman? Oh, you mean the whale from hell?

Harry 'The Hippo' Gutterman: Nurse!

Nurse: Right on cue. Room 116. Help yourself.

Harry 'The Hippo' Gutterman: Help!

Mac: Aren't you going to go in and see what's wrong with him?

Nurse: I'd rather set my head on fire and have it put out with a sledgehammer.

Harry 'The Hippo' Gutterman: Nurse!

Mac: I'd like to see that actually.

[Jared and Mallory arrive to see their Aunt Lucinda, in a hurry while on the run from the goblins]

Nurse: Wow, you're really in a hurry.

Jared Grace: [Jared holds flowers] We're just really excited to see her.

Nurse: [as Mallory carries her sword at her side] Those are nice flowers, and sword.

Mallory Grace: Oh, I take fencing.

Little Kid: [stammering] What are you in for?

[he scoots away]

Charlie Brown: Have you ever had that feeling when you can't stop smiling?

Little Kid: Huh?

Charlie Brown: Your heart pounds inside your chest? You try to stand, but your knees become weak?

[he falls; the little kid gasps]

Charlie Brown: And then that Little Red-Haired Girl glances at you

[he starts to float up, surrounded by hearts]

Little Kid: Whoa!

Charlie Brown: And all of life's possibilities become so clear. And then you realize...

[he falls back into the chair]

Little Kid: [flies out of his chair and falls on the scale] Ah!

Charlie Brown: ...she has no idea you're alive.

Nurse: Wah wah wah?

Charlie Brown: Why am I here?

[he sighs]

Charlie Brown: Because I just came down with a serious case of inadequacy.

Nurse: Listen, I don't want you tiring her out.

Helena: What do you think I'm going to do? Take her dancing?

Nurse: Who is next in line for an enema?

Barnet - Reporter: Fogel, was it you?

Vogel - Reporter: How do you like that! I cross the ocean to save an entire country and what stops me - an enema!

Nurse: You're a quiet little fellow, aren't you?

Baby Weems: Well, there really isn't much to talk about.

Nurse: He talks!

Baby Weems: Why? Is it against the rules?

Nurse: Oh, Doctor!

[Faints]

[Julius visits Gerry in the hospital]

Nurse: Only kin's allowed in here.

Bertier: Alice, are you blind? Don't you see the family resemblance? That's my brother.

Bertier: [the Titans have just had a touchdown scored against them in the State Championship] NO! Nooooooooo!

Nurse: [Nurse comes running in] What's wrong, Gerry?

Bertier: Do *not* come in here!

[Nurse exits hurriedly, followed by a projectile]

Nurse: Oh my goodness, you gave me the willies! You look like that Dracula guy.

Bela Lugosi: My name is Bela Lugosi... and I wish to commit myself.

Nurse: For what reason?

Bela Lugosi: I have been a drug addict for twenty years. I NEED HELP!

Mrs. Teresa D'Onofrio: [cooing] Hello,beautiful baby.

[to the nurse]

Mrs. Teresa D'Onofrio: Is this not the most beautiful baby you've ever seen? I'm serious, is this not the most beautiful baby you've ever seen?

Nurse: To be honest, in a while yes.

Mrs. Teresa D'Onofrio: [to Leonard] Lets go see Bev.

Mr. Leonard Donofrio: No.

Mrs. Teresa D'Onofrio: She wants to see you Leo!

Mr. Leonard Donofrio: No.

[to Jason]

Mr. Leonard Donofrio: Look your mother is 16, your father is a moron, and they want us to celebrate. We know better. Just for the record, I'm on your side.

Viola De Lesseps: [as Juliet] I do remember well where I should be, and there I am - where is my Romeo?

Nurse: [shouting from the audience] Dead!

Nurse: Lord Wessex was looking at you tonight.

Viola De Lesseps: All the men at court are without poetry. If they see me, they see my father's fortune, I - will have poetry in my life. And adventure. And love. Love above all.

Nurse: Not Valentine and Sylvia.

Viola De Lesseps: No! Not the artful postures of love, but love that overthrows life. Unbiddable, ungovernable, like a riot in the heart, and nothing to be done, come ruin or rapture. Love as there has never been in a play. I will have love. Or I will end my days as a...

Nurse: As a nurse?

Viola De Lesseps: Oh, but I will be Valentine and Sylvia too. Oh, good nurse, God save you and good night.

[Whispering at Viola's bedroom door]

Nurse: My lady, the house is stirring. It is a new day.

Viola De Lesseps: It is a new WORLD.

Nurse: Sometimes, people just die.

Phil: Not today.

Nurse: You woke up?

Nick Naylor: [off camera] Perhaps a bad choice of inflection.

Nurse: [Sabrina approaches David's room] He's still sleeping.

Sabrina: Is that normal?

Nurse: When you're taking what he's taking, it is. But, he wakes up from time to time.

Sabrina: Has he asked for anyone?

Nurse: Bert and Ernie.

Sabrina: Oh. Could you tell him Sabrina was here?

Nurse: I could tell him the Pope was here, but I don't think it would make a dent.

[forces Elizabeth into her room]

Nurse: Good night, flake!

Fred: Yeah, well, we're not scared of you, fatso!

[the door locks]

Buck Laughlin: Tell me, do you know the difference between a rectal thermometer and a tongue depressor?

Nurse: Uh, no.

Buck Laughlin: Remind me never to come to you for a physical!

Nurse: One minute more, Mrs. Miller and you can breathe again.

Young girl: [barging in] Oh, I'm sorry. I'm looking for grandma.

[she wanders into the next room]

Young girl: Grandma isn't in there...

First Mudbath Woman: Well, she isn't in here... Oh! This tub has worms in it! I know it has worms! I can feel them!

Girl in a bath: They're probably more afraid of you than you are of them.

Young girl: Well, what's the matter with a little worm? Why, at Harvard and Yale they eat them...

Rhonda Altobello: Hi, I'd like to sign up for Lamaze classes.

Nurse: Okay. How are Tuesday nights for you and your coach?

Rhonda Altobello: Perfect. But, I don't have a coach.

Nurse: Well, what about the father?

Rhonda Altobello: Well, you see, that's sort of confusing. It's either David Lee Roth who's on tour or Sean Penn. And I'd really hate to upset Madonna.

Nurse: [unamused] Fill this out.

Nurse: Au revoir, Madeline!

Madeline: Au revoir!

Nurse: Excuse me, ma'am. There's some, pretty badly banged up, people back there. I'm gonna need some fresh sheets, guaze, Q-Tips, and all the vasoline you have on board.

Elaine Dickinson: Ted, Please.

Nurse: Right now!

Injured Man: Are you, the nurse?

Nurse: Yes, take this. The washroom's, just right down there, on the right.

Nurse: You here to visit?

Mike: Yes. I think we're all excited to see how he's doing.

Nurse: Have you seen "The Exorcist"?

Mike: Yeah.

Nurse: Did you like it?

Mike: Yeah. Is this dangerous?

Nurse: Not clinically.

Stevo: What does that mean?

Charlie: What would it turn out like, Paddy? You know what I mean, don't you?

Patrick "Kitten" Braden: It'd be an absolute disaster. Like me.

Nurse: Now... I want you to read this leaflet. It outlines all aspects of the termiation procedure.

Charlie: Termination? You mean this is an abortion clinic?

Nurse: Yes, of course it is.

Charlie: Oh. I thought it was a fertility clinic.

[gets up and leaves]

Patrick "Kitten" Braden: [to the nurse] I think she's changed her mind. Thank you.

Dr. Kosevich: I've got it! Nurse, call the Anesthesiologist, this woman needs an enema!

Samuel, Rebecca, Nurse: An enema?

Dr. Kosevich: No, uh, she needs a pedicure!

Nurse: This ain't no goddam beauty parlor!

Dr. Kosevich: Epitath!

Samuel Faulkner: She's not dead, you moron!

Dr. Kosevich: Epidermus... Uh...

Rebecca Taylor: Epidural, asshole!

Nurse: Is this man bothering you?

Phil: 'Course he is. He's me dad.

Jane: [Elaine is crying at Robin's bedside, the nurse thinks her sniffles are relative to a cold, and tells her she could aggravate her daughter's condition] It's not a goddamn cold! Don't be such a hoo-hoo.

Nurse: [apathetic] And what's a hoo-hoo?

Elaine: [kindly] It's a cunt, dear.

[nurse gasps]

Elaine: Now why don't you leave us alone?

Nurse: I'll see what I can do.

Polly Reed: You'll do more than just see, missy! You'll do! See?

Nurse: Doctor this man is unknown. His papers were lost. Delirium following malarial fever.

Jacky Bonnot: I can make it beef bourguignon?

Nurse: In two, three years.

Jacky Bonnot: Why is it taking so long?

Nurse: It's a baby.

[the school nurse hands a student a paper which has an appointment for a pregnancy test]

Nurse: Here you go you little slut.

Secretary: Doctor, may I have an OK on this, please?

Dr. Hackenbush: I'm too busy right now. I"ll tell you what, I'll put the O on now and come back later for the K.

Doctor: Doctor Hackenbush.

Dr. Hackenbush: A little later.

[to his nurse]

Dr. Hackenbush: Eh, get me the Turkish bath.

Nurse: Yes sir.

Nurse: Doctor, the Turkish Bath.

[Hands him the phone]

Dr. Hackenbush: Hello. Yes, will you look in the steam room and see if my frankfurters are done?

Maria Gambrelli: [Dreyfus is in his hospital bed, watching 'A Day At the Races' with the Marx Brothers and Margaret Dumont; Mrs. Dumont says "Oh, dear! Come, gentlemen, let us begin!" Groucho responds with "Oh, you shouldn't have done that, now we're all unsterilized." The Marxes go to the washbasin singing 'Down By The Old Mill Stream'; Maria, Jacques and Sgt. Duval enter Dreyfus's hospital room] How are you?

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Terrible.

Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, no doubt it was a 'beumb'.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: A what?

Maria Gambrelli: A bomb.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: A -

[Dreyfus suddenly coughs]

Maria Gambrelli: Oh, you should rest, Charles.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: How do you know my... first name?

Maria Gambrelli: You told me in the ambulance.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: [confused] That's strange, I - I don't remember, but I remember you.

Maria Gambrelli: You said: "My name is Charlie Dreyfus, and I'm going to be a policeman."

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: I used to say that... as a child. I must have been delirious.

[Jacques picks up the bed control, mistaking it for the TV remote]

Maria Gambrelli: No, you were very sweet.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: I was?

Maria Gambrelli: Yes.

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: [Jacques pushes the remote's buttons, trying to adjust the TV, and the bed suddenly shifts] What's this? What's this? What? Oh, something's happened. Ow! Ow!

Maria Gambrelli: Jacques!

[At this point, the bed's mishaps take a remarkably simaliar coincidental parallel to the examination bed scene in 'A Day At The Races']

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Wrong mechanism!

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Stop!

Maria Gambrelli: Oh, Jacques!

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Stop it, please! Please! What are you doing. Give me that!

Maria Gambrelli: Give it to me!

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Something terrible has happened!

Nurse: [the nurse takes the bed remote and gives Jacques the TV remote] There! There! Now don't play with it again!

Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: [relieved] Thank you, nurse.

Doctor: [Esther is in labor] Alright, Esther, I'm gonna need you to push.

Esther P. Mendez: [Notices the doctor has a cigar in his mouth] I-Is that a cigar?

Doctor: I just have this for stress, it's not lit.

Carmen: How can you be smoking a cigar when you're supposed to be delivering a baby?

Nurse: This is the kind of stress he's talking about, ma'am.

Carmen: Have you been drinking?

Doctor: If you want a sober white doctor in this town, it's gonna cost you a fortune.

Nurse: Ain't that the truth.

Doctor: [Sees the baby starting to come out] Oh, man, this is gonna be a big baby. I just hope I can pull him out before he pulls me in.

Nurse: Just a minute miss, sorry to bug you. But your father hasn't filled out his dinner menu yet. Would you mind?

Brett Eisenberg: He's not my father.

Nurse: Excuse me?

Brett Eisenberg: I said he's not my father. He's my boyfriend. I have sex with him!

Nurse: Either way he eats, right?

[Brett walks into the hospital room, pulls back the curtain, and we see Archie in bed]

Archie Knox: [using a high pitch, mimicking voice] He's my boyfriend. I have sex with him!

[to a stretcher case with a bandaged head]

Nurse: Don't worry. We'll soon have you back at the front.

Nurse: 216 just shit himself - I need some help here ...

Kate Lawson: Can you see I'm on the phone?

Nurse: You forgot to fill out your age, what is it?

Olive: [in nearly a whisper] Oh uh two, eight, uh 68.

Nurse: I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you, could you speak up...

Olive: [frustrated now] August 2nd, 1968.

Nurse: Wow! You're the exact same age as *my* mom. Neat.

Dede: [an army of zombies attacks the town] Shoot!

Nurse: We can't. They're us. They're good people.

Dede: They're going to eat you!

Nurse: Family.

Nurse: She thinks every man is after her.

Dr. Ernest Stoppidge: [to the nurse] Well, we can't have her disturbing the rest of the patients like this.

Dr. Ernest Stoppidge: [to Miss. Armitage] Now come, come, Miss Armitage. We mustn't be a silly girl, must we?

Miss Armitage: [shouting] Keep back! Keep back!

Dr. Ernest Stoppidge: You know me. I'm Doctor Stoppidge.

Miss Armitage: Hmph. You're all the same. You're only after one thing.

Dr. Ernest Stoppidge: No, no - that'd be quite untrue, Miss. Armitage. I only want to get you into bed.

Miss Armitage: [screaming] Get out of here, you sex maniacs!

Nurse: [Observing Mildred flirting with Flash in the rest home] Just the *thought* of you two bumpin' uglies messes me up.

Nurse: What's happened to your gown?

Dallas: I threw it away.

Nurse: [rolls eyes] I can't wait till you're outta here.

Dallas: Get out, just get out! You're making me sick in my stomach.

[laughs]

Nurse: Can I help you?

The Lieutenant: Yeah, I'm in charge of the investigation. I'm just checking security.

Nurse: Security?

The Lieutenant: Yeah. You wouldn't want those guys coming back, huh? For the nun? Or for you?

Nurse: She's got two broken ribs, a broken jaw, and a bad concussion. We're going to keep her overnight for observation.

Nurse: Are you awake? There's a lady here to see you.

Ed Beaumont: What kind of a lady?

Nurse: Miss Janet Henry.

Ed Beaumont: Tell her to go away.

Nurse: I can't do that. She knows you're better.

Ed Beaumont: When are we gonna be alone again?

Nurse: *Never* if I can help it.

Ed Beaumont: Then I suppose I'll *have* to see her.

Nurse: No wonder people *beat* you up.

Nurse: If he gives me any trouble I'll break his jaw.

Paul Madvig: Mmm. Nice girl.

Nurse: Who's Tony?

Wendy Torrance: He's the little boy that lives in his mouth.

Nurse: I'd thought you'd be happy for Miz. Threadgood.

Evelyn Couch: [Crying and very upset] Happy? Cuz she's dead?

Nurse: No that she gets to go home. She just left in a yellow cab.

Evelyn Couch: [Looking VERY confused] I don't understand...

Nurse: Well, there was really no point in her staying here now that Mrs. Otis died...

Evelyn Couch: [Wide eyed] Mrs. OTIS died?

Nurse: Well yes.

Evelyn Couch: Mrs Otis died!

[hopping around laughing]

Evelyn Couch: Mrs. Otis died!

[catches herself]

Evelyn Couch: Not that I'm happy that Mrs. Otis is dead.

Nurse: [Kathy has just discovered Ruth at the same donation clinic] Is that someone you know?

Kathy: Yeah. Actually, we grew up together.

Nurse: Oh.

Kathy: How is she?

Nurse: ...Were you close?

Kathy: We haven't seen each other now for almost ten years.

Nurse: Well, Ruth isn't as strong as we would hope, at this stage.

Kathy: She's done two donations?

Nurse: She has.

Kathy: ...You think she'll complete on the third?

Nurse: I think she wants to complete. And, as you know, when they want to complete, they usually do.

Nurse: I think she wants to complete, and you know, when they want to complete, they usually do.

Sidney: [Staring at Thorsen's Daughter] No! No, wait!

[Gets up in front of Thorsen, faces the Nurse, and starts shouting]

Sidney: No! Hey! Wait! Enough bullshit! You need to help her right now!

Nurse: Excuse me...?

Sidney: Man, why you giving me all this shit? Ain't you got some oxygen or something you can give her?

Nurse: All right. Let me get a supervisor.

[Attempts to leave]

Sidney: [Blocks her way] No, no, no, no! You don't need to get no supervisor! You the supervisor today! Huh? You are the supervisor today! You feel me on that? Now I want you to get your skinny ass down the hall, put the little girl on a tray and supervise her, and I want you to get her some goddamn air!

[Patting Thorsen's Daughter's shoulder]

Sidney: I got your back, sis!

[Notices the Nurse hasn't left yet]

Sidney: Aw, bitch you still here?

[Gets out a gun and shoots the floor. The nurse hurries out]

Sidney: Shit! Shit ain't funny now!

[Thorsen's Daughter is put on a stretcher]

Sidney: Aw! Aw come on, man! Come on! Come on, man! Damn! Aw!

[Sidney is arrested and put in handcuffs]

Hilary van Doren: You see, I was offered this place in the San Francisco Ballet. I haven't told anyone yet, but I'm gonna take it. I don't care what they think. I'm a good dancer. Better than good. Maybe even the best in the school. And that's not conceit, it's just simple honesty. If I stay in New York, everyone will think I bought my way into ABT. And I'm not starving myself for Balanchine's City Ballet. Not that I mind doing the corps de ballet bullshit. I'd sooner do it out of town. I'll pay my dues on the west coast, come back to New York a star. You see, I've always had this crazy dream of dancing all the classical roles before I'm twenty-one. I want Giselles and CoppÈlias coming out of my feet. And Sleeping Beauties, and the Swan. I want bravos in Stuttgart and Leningrad and Paris. Maybe even a ballet created especially for me. You see? There's no room for a baby.

Nurse: Will this be Master Charge or American Express, honey?

Nurse: Doctors make the worst patients. They know too much.

Nurse: Can I get you something for your feet?

Gloria Beatty: How about a saw.

Nurse: I'm going to tell you exactly what the doctor told her parents. She's obviously suffering from temporary amnesia. It's not uncommon in cases like this. Since the... since the presence of her parents agitates her, we suggest she doesn't see them for a while. She seems to recognize you, and feel comfortable around you, so we think in a few days, she should be going home with you. And her recovery should be fairly rapid.

Nurse: What do you even do here?

Georgie: I save lives.

Nurse: The operation was a success. You're out of danger.

Rachel Cameron: How can I be out of danger if I'm not dead?

[first lines]

Nurse: [offscreen] Miss Carmichael, please. Dr. Petersen is ready for you.

Paul Taylor: We've had a car accident, this guy needs to see a doctor.

Meg Penny: He has something on his hand, some kind of acid, or something.

Nurse: Does he have Blue Cross?

Meg Penny: I don't know.

Nurse: Medical insurance of any kind?

Paul Taylor: Look, we don't even know who the guy is!

Freddy Krueger: [Disguised as the school nurse]

[Wakes Kristen with smelling salts]

Freddy Krueger: Feeling better now?

Kristen Parker: What happened?

Freddy Krueger: Don't worry, you had quite a nasty bump.

[turns around and starts to laugh darkly before turning around as himself]

Freddy Krueger: I wanna draw some blood!

Kristen Parker: NO!

[is woken up by smelling salts]

Kristen Parker: No!

Nurse: Feeling better now?

Kristen Parker: What happened?

Nurse: You had quite a nasty bump.

Nurse: What is wrong with you people! What's he doing here? I'm calling the police.

Kyle: Police are dead.

Caitlin: All of them?

Kyle: Pretty much.

Nurse: Go. Run.

Alex Trubituan: What do you mean?

Nurse: Run right now. This guy has plans for you and your friends and his plans are pretty fucking elaborate and pretty fucking fucked. So if I were you, I'd just run.

Mark Elliot: She writes poetry.

Nurse: A pastime especially suited for women.

[first lines]

Nurse: What's wrong with him?

Bobby: Suicide attempt.

Nurse: Hmm. Who is this guy, anyway?

Bobby: His name is John Lucker. A few years ago, he murdered eight girls. Raped them afterwards. And when I mean afterwards, I mean while some of the corpses were decomposing!

Nurse: Long live schlager queen!

Mona: [looking suprised]

Nurse: Ohh ohhhh! Well we only could manage to collent for some flowers 'cause we just wanna say to you how proud we are!I mean we had no clue that you could write and sing songs it's just so amazing!

Mona: Oh! Whatta nice flowers, I dunno what to say..

Nurse: Long live schlager queen!

[claps with other nurses]

Mona: And do you know what happened today? A very nice guy called, his name was Leif and he's a producer

Nurse: [makes a shocked look] What?!?

Mona: And on the afternoon, he invited me on lunch to some very nice place...

Nurse: Well he's buying, isn't he?

Mona: Well I damn hope so! I don't have 2 bucks in the pocket!

Nurse: When I see you out making a friend, then I believe you're from Brooklyn.

[last lines]

Gramps: [meeting his new nurse] Hey, if you're gonna be hanging around the house, I need to know two things.

Nurse: What are those?

Gramps: Can you make huevos rancheros?

Nurse: Oh, I can manage that.

Gramps: Good. Now, what's your story on menopause, huh?

Nurse: I always pause for men, Harry.

Dr. Robert Merrick: Take back to the cook and tell her that if she brings back again, I'm gonna buy this hospital and fire her and everybody else in it. I want some decent breakfast.

Nurse: It's the same breakfast we serve all the patients.

Dr. Robert Merrick: Yeah, but I am "The Special".

Nurse: It's much easier to run a hospital with all the patients sleeping.

Jerry Cornelius: Easiest way to run the world, for that matter.

Nurse: [to Macarthy] Looking for someone Mr. Macarthy?