Noxeema Jackson Quotes in To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (1995)

Noxeema Jackson: When a straight man puts on a dress and gets his sexual kicks, he is a transvestite. When a man is a woman trapped in a man's body and has a little operation he is a Transsexual.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: I know that.

Noxeema Jackson: When a gay man has way too much fashion sense for one gender he is a drag queen.

Vida Boheme: Thank you.

Noxeema Jackson: And when a tired little Latin boy puts on a dress, he is simply a boy in a dress!

Vida Boheme: Your approval is not needed.

Noxeema Jackson: Approval neither desired nor required.

Vida Boheme: Virgil is beating up Carol Ann.

Noxeema Jackson: Sounds like...

Vida Boheme: Well, we have to help her.

Noxeema Jackson: No. There are times when you help people, and there are times when *if* you help people you might get killed, so you *don't* help people.

Noxeema Jackson: That might be all fine and dandy but still have a lot more to learn before you become a full fledged Queen, my dear.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Can't I just stay a princess they're so much younger than Queens

[laughs]

Noxeema Jackson: Does everything have to be a joke with you, this is not a masquerade! This is real life! There are steps to becoming a Queen.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: I'm sorry. How many?

Noxeema Jackson: Four! There are four steps to becoming a Drag Queen.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Don't be stingy tell me what are they!

Vida Boheme: Patience mon cheri. You will know when you've done them. Noxeema our Dutchess of Protocol will inform you.

Noxeema Jackson: [laughs sarcastically] That's right just sit back. Auntie Vida's gonna make you a big ol'queen don't you worry.

Noxeema Jackson: Little latin boy in drag, why are you crying?

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: It's just cause the two of you are so pretty, you know. You're so pretty.

Vida Boheme: Yes, of course we're pretty, but why are you crying?

Noxeema Jackson: Maybe she just found out Menudo broke up.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: How do I look?

Noxeema Jackson: Like the Miami Sound Machine just exploded all over you!

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: [as Vida beats up Virgil] There's something you need to know about Vida... She...

Noxeema Jackson: [quickly] Vida works out. Yeah, Vida works out.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: A lot!

Noxeema Jackson: [about Chi-Chi] Look at her, runnin' like she's runnin' cross the border!

Noxeema Jackson: [to Clara] Ms. Vida seems to think that I don't have a dream. Well, honey, I'm not Martin Luther King. I don't need a dream. I have a plan. You know I'm gonna tell you what it is, because instinctively I knew I could trust you, being as you're not a big talker and everything. My plan is that while in Hollywood I will be approached by an imminent producer, at The Ivy no doubt, to star in the lush film version of the Life of Ms. Dorothy Dandridge. Yes that noble blacktress, who never played domestic help. And then who's career was crushed by the white Hollywood machine.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: I think maybe he's prejudice-said.

Noxeema Jackson: I'll bet you were the brightest in your class, weren't you?

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt: Oh, my God, I'm like a compass near north.

Noxeema Jackson: Thank you.

Noxeema Jackson: You know, Vida, you were absolutely right.

Vida Boheme: About what?

Noxeema Jackson: I mean, now I realize that... you gotta take chances. Because you never know, you know what I mean? I mean, what the hell! I'm not gonna worry about if people accept me or not. I'm gonna make Hollywood wherever I am at.

Vida Boheme: I would like...

Noxeema Jackson: Stand up, Vida.

Vida Boheme: Since you have obviously learned nothing, I am hereby stripping you of all your princess points.

[exaggerated ripping up and throwing away motions]

Noxeema Jackson: Oooooh! That's voodoo.

Tommy: Baby, you are a whole lot of woman... and I know what you need.

Noxeema Jackson: I hardly think you're the man to give it to me.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: ¡Ay, nenita! Look! Look at this! Look what I found!

Noxeema Jackson: Golly, golly, golly.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: The seats are like butter.

Noxeema Jackson: Now this is a car.

Vida Boheme: A car? Mary Alice Louise, no. This is a land yacht.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: You know, I used to know a lawyer guy who had a car just like this, and I said right then and there I was gonna have one for myself. Vida, can we have this?

Noxeema Jackson: But we daren't.

Vida Boheme: I feel like Miss Jayne Mansfield in this car.

Noxeema Jackson: Oooh, Jayne Mansfield. Not a good auto reference.

Vida Boheme: Chi-Chi, you just sit right here. I am going upstairs to have a talk with Miss Noxeema. We will be right back.

Noxeema Jackson: I am not going upstairs with you. I ain't drivin' you no more, Miss Daisy!

[after Billy Ray comes to ask a girl out]

Vida Boheme: I declare.

Bobby Lee: I declare.

Carol Ann: *I* declare.

Noxeema Jackson: I decline.

Noxeema Jackson: This America does not respond kindly to our sort of person.

Vida Boheme: [sees a picture of Julie Newmar in the reflection of her compact mirror] Oh! No one say anything frivolous for the next few moments. I am having a significant experience.

Noxeema Jackson: [waves her finger in a twirling motion] Whoopy!

Vida Boheme: Look, Miss Julie Newmar has been watching silently over this entire conversation. And look at her, vintage Miss Julie. She is the perfect, the ultimate... oh! Try to describe her and not use the word "statuesque". Oh, Miss Julie, you are statuesque and you were the only Catwoman. Oh, read it please.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: "To Wong Foo, Thanks for everything, Julie Newmar." Who was Wong Foo?

Vida Boheme: I don't know but evidently they were close.

Noxeema Jackson: I've had enough of this conversation, I'm hungry.

Vida Boheme: We must take this message from Miss Newmar with us across the land as our sovereign token.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Let's just relax. It's gonna be alright.

Noxeema Jackson: I wish I was back in the club car, now we're driving across America.

Noxeema Jackson: Why do I feel like I'm in the Tournament of Roses Parade?

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Because you're as big as a float.

Noxeema Jackson: Your mother.

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Thank you.

Beatrice: This is my Aunt Martha's dress. I thought you could use it. She was real big on the shoulders.

Noxeema Jackson: Thank you, girl.

Vida Boheme: Oh, sweet pea. Now, you listen to your Auntie Vida. I want you to believe in yourself, imagine good things and moisturize, I cannot stress this enough.

Clara: Miss Noxeema.

Noxeema Jackson: Miss Clara.

Clara: Now, listen, when you get to Hollywood, you give this letter to Mr. Robert Mitchum.

Noxeema Jackson: Oh, I will, I will, I promise you. I'll guard it with my life. Thank you. I'm gonna miss you.

Clara: I'm gonna miss you, too.

Noxeema Jackson: Good bye.

Clara: Bye.

Noxeema Jackson: I hope she leaves me those albums in her will. Alright, let's see. Can I hear it?

Tommy: Good afternoon.

Noxeema Jackson: Sounds wonderful. And look at the shirt, the shirt is fierce, and the hair is working. Get along now. You take care. Be good to yourself.

Noxeema Jackson: [from trailer] Look, I'm sorry about the way the civil war turned out.

Noxeema Jackson: You obviously have me mistaken for Miss Rosa Parks.

Noxeema Jackson: [looking around at all the rich houses] Ohhh, there will be a barbeque at 12 Oaks tonight.

Noxeema Jackson: [to Chi-Chi] Step four: Larger than life is just the right size.

Vida Boheme: [to Noxeema] You know, pumpkins?

Noxeema Jackson: What?

Vida Boheme: Sometimes it just takes a fairy.

Noxeema Jackson: [to Tommy] Do you like my nails?

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Maybe if somebody gave me back my "Princess Points", I would do the hitchhiking thing and get us a ride.

Noxeema Jackson: How you gonna hitchhike, huh?, if there are no cars, stupid?

Miss Chi-Chi Rodriguez: Well, you don't know me very well, do you, Creepella. I'm the Latina Marilyn Monroe. I got more legs than a bucket of chicken.

Vida Boheme: Now, she's going to get herself kidnapped by some wild mountain main and WE will have to rescue her.

Noxeema Jackson: Why she always gotta have the last word, huh?

Noxeema Jackson: Hi! I'm Noxeema Jackson. Jesse's daughter.

Noxeema Jackson: Ooh, Miss Clara, we gonna make you look like Emma Peel!

Noxeema Jackson: I think I'm gonna black out.

[she faints]

Vida Boheme: Noxeema, you remember John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt?

Noxeema Jackson: [shakes hand] Oh yes, his name is my name too.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt: Do people always shout? I hate that.

Noxeema Jackson: If you want them to know there is steak for dinner, you got to let them *hear* it sizzle! Understand?

Bobby Lee: Yeah.

Noxeema Jackson: How're you gonna hitchhike, huh?, if there are no cars, stupid?

Noxeema Jackson: Why she always have to have the last word, huh?