Naomi Lapaglia Quotes in The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)

Jordan Belfort: [holding his child] Does Daddy get a kiss from both of his little girls?

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh, no. No, Daddy doesn't even get to touch Mommy for a very, very... very long time.

Jordan Belfort: Daddy's really sorry about what he said in the other room, he didn't mean any of it!

Naomi Lapaglia: Daddy shouldn't waste his time. And from now on... it's gonna be nothing but short, short skirts around the house. And you know something else, Daddy? Mommy is just so sick and tired of wearing panties.

Jordan Belfort: Yeah?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah.

Naomi Lapaglia: [pushes him away with her legs] But no touching.

Jordan Belfort: Oh, gosh.

Naomi Lapaglia: Who's Venice?

Jordan Belfort: Who? Who?

Naomi Lapaglia: Who? Who? What are you, a fuckin' owl?

Jordan Belfort: Oh my God! You had to deal with the Golf Course people too! What a greek tragedy! Honey oh my God!, you probably had to pay them in cash with your hands! What a fucking burden, and actually had to do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day? Huh? Cause I can't keep track of your professions honey! Last month you were a wine connoisseur, and now you're an aspiring landscape architect, Isn't that right?

Naomi Lapaglia: Fuck you!

Jordan Belfort: Don't you dare throw that fucking water on me! Don't you fucking dare!

Naomi Lapaglia: Did you just cum?

Jordan Belfort: Oh yeah. I just came. Did you? Did you cum?

Naomi Lapaglia: No.

Jordan Belfort: No? OK. I'm still hard. Just give me a second.

Naomi Lapaglia: Sure.

Naomi Lapaglia: I want a divorce.

Jordan Belfort: What do you mean you want a divorce? What is that supposed to mean, you want a divorce?

Naomi Lapaglia: Get off me! I want a divorce. Get off.

Jordan Belfort: You just made love to me. What the fuck is wrong with you?

Naomi Lapaglia: I don't love you anymore, Jordan!

Jordan Belfort: Oh, you don't love me? You don't love me anymore, huh? Well isn't that just fucking convenient for you! Now that I'm under federal indictment with an electronic bracelet around my ankle, now you decide you don't fucking love me anymore. Is that right?

Naomi Lapaglia: No, no.

Jordan Belfort: What kind of person are you? Tell me.

Naomi Lapaglia: You married me!

Jordan Belfort: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan, this is how it's gonna go. I'm gonna take custody of the kids. If you agree to the divorce right now, I will allow visitation. Okay? Don't try to fight it.

Jordan Belfort: Oh my God.

Naomi Lapaglia: It will save us both a lot of money and I got a feeling you're gonna need it.

Jordan Belfort: You're not taking my kids, sweetheart. You hear me?

Naomi Lapaglia: I've already talked to the lawyer. He said even if you don't get convicted I've got a good chance of getting them.

Jordan Belfort: I got news for you. You're not fucking taking my children you vicious fucking cunt, you!

[Naomi slaps Jordan and he slaps her back]

Jordan Belfort: Fuck you! You fucking bitch! You're not fucking taking my goddamn fucking kids! You hear me? Fuck you! You're not fucking taking my fucking kids! Fucking whore.

Naomi Lapaglia: [Sees Jordan snorting cocaine] Look at yourself, Jordan. You're sick! You're a sick man!

Jordan Belfort: Fuck you! I told you, you're not taking my fucking kids.

Naomi Lapaglia: You think I would let my kids near you? Look at yourself! You know what my lawyer said? My lawyer said that you're going to prison for 20 years, Jordan! Twenty fucking years! You're never gonna see the kids again! No, I'm not fucking letting you near my kids!

Jordan Belfort: You don't think I'm gonna see my fucking kids again, huh?

Naomi Lapaglia: Wake up, you piece of shit! Who's Venice?

Jordan Belfort: Who?

Naomi Lapaglia: Huh?

Jordan Belfort: Who? Who?

Naomi Lapaglia: Who? What are you, a fucking owl? Who is she? Some little hooker you were fucking last night?

Jordan Belfort: What the fuck are you talking about? No. No way, baby, no!

Naomi Lapaglia: You were calling her name in your sleep!

Jordan Belfort: Are you out of your fucking mind? I don't even know who Venice is. What the fuck does that even mean? Venice. That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard in my fucking life!

[after flashback of sex with Venice]

Jordan Belfort: That's right. That's right, I forgot. Donnie and I were investing in a condominium complex in Venice. That's why all this confusion.

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh, you're investing in Italy?

Jordan Belfort: Not Italy. California, baby!

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh, California? You're a lying piece of shit!

Jordan Belfort: Duchess, baby, come on!

Naomi Lapaglia: Don't you fucking Duchess me! Don't you Duchess me! Do you really think that I don't know what you're up to? You're a father now, Jordan.

Jordan Belfort: Yeah! I know.

Naomi Lapaglia: You're a father now. And you're still acting like an infant!

[throws water in his face]

Jordan Belfort: Fuck! Goddamn it! Baby, you know you got real anger issues.

Naomi Lapaglia: Who is the one who flew in here at 3:00 in the morning on their stupid helicopter and woke up Skylar? That was you! Doesn't even matter to you! Does it even matter to you that I just had that driving range sodded with Bermuda grass, Jordan, and now you fucking wrecked it!

Jordan Belfort: Oh, Bermuda grass.

Naomi Lapaglia: No, you didn't research the whole thing and deal with the fucking golf course people!

Jordan Belfort: Oh my God! You had to deal with the gold course people, too! What a Greek tragedy honey! Oh my God! You probably had to pay them in cash with your hands! What a fucking burden! And actually do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day, huh? Because I can't keep track of your professions, honey. Last month you were a wine connoisseur, now you're an aspiring landscape architect. Let me get that right.

Naomi Lapaglia: Fuck you!

Jordan Belfort: Don't fucking dare throw that fucking water at me. Don't you fucking dare.

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh my God!

Jordan Belfort: Will you marry me?

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh my God.

Jordan Belfort: Is that a yes?

Naomi Lapaglia: Are you sure?

Jordan Belfort: Yeah I'm sure. Yeah, I'm sure. Are you sure?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah!

Naomi Lapaglia: Good morning, daddy. Where's my kiss?

Jordan Belfort: Hey, sweetheart! Does daddy get a kiss from both of his little girls, huh?

Naomi Lapaglia: Oh no. No, daddy doesn't even get to touch mommy for a very, very, very long time.

Jordan Belfort: Daddy's really sorry about what he said in the other room. He didn't mean any of it.

Naomi Lapaglia: Daddy shouldn't waste his time. And from now on, it's gonna be nothing but short, short skirts around the house. And you know something else, daddy? Mommy is just so sick and tired of wearing panties.

Jordan Belfort: Yeah?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. In fact, she's decided to throw them all away.

[opens legs]

Naomi Lapaglia: So take a good look, daddy. You're gonna be seeing an awful lot of this around the house.

Jordan Belfort: Oh, baby. Yeah mommy.

Naomi Lapaglia: But no touching.

Jordan Belfort: Ow.

Naomi Lapaglia: What's wrong, daddy?

Jordan Belfort: Mmm, baby. Okay, mommy likes to play games with daddy. Mommy, have you ever noticed anything odd about Mr. Fuzzy Bear over there? His eyes seem to be a little bit odd, don't they? Yeah, there's something a little bit different about his eyes. Yes, I think it's true. Say hi, mommy!

[waves to security camera]

Jordan Belfort: Say hi to Rocco and Rocco! Say hi! Hi, fellas!

Naomi Lapaglia: Fuck you!

Jordan Belfort: [narration] Of all the fucking days, she chooses today to give me blue balls.

Jordan Belfort: Give me a kiss, sweetheart.

Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan.

Jordan Belfort: Oh come on, baby. I haven't made love to you in so long.

Naomi Lapaglia: No.

Jordan Belfort: Please.

Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan, stop it.

[Jordan continues kissing her]

Naomi Lapaglia: No! Jordan, stop it!

Jordan Belfort: [flashes to Jordan having sex with Naomi] I love you so much.

Naomi Lapaglia: I fucking hate you , Jordan! Get off me!

Jordan Belfort: No, baby. Don't do that. You know how much I love you, right? Stop that sweetie, please?

Naomi Lapaglia: [pauses] You wanna fuck me, Jordan? You wanna fuck me? Good. Go at it. Go ahead and fuck me. I want you to fuck me real hard. I want you to fuck me like it's the last fucking time. Come on.

Jordan Belfort: Babe, why you doing it like that?

Naomi Lapaglia: Because I want you to come for me, baby.

Jordan Belfort: Come on, baby.

Naomi Lapaglia: Come for me, baby. I want you to come for me like it's the last fucking time.

Jordan Belfort: Yeah?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah! Come on, baby. Come for me. Come on, baby.

Jordan Belfort: Yeah? Want me to come for you?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah.

[Jordan forcefully finishes]

Jordan Belfort: Oh God! Oh!

[laughing]

Jordan Belfort: Oh baby. That was so fucking great.

Naomi Lapaglia: That was the last time.

Jordan Belfort: What do you mean, baby?

Naomi Lapaglia: I mean that was the last time we ever have sex.

Jordan Belfort: [whispering] Donnie. Hold on baby. Donnie.

[yells]

Jordan Belfort: Donnie!

Donnie Azoff: What?

Jordan Belfort: Get the fucking ludes.

Donnie Azoff: I don't wanna die, Jordan! I did a lot of bad shit. I'm going to hell, Jordan! I fucked up! I fucked up so bad.

Jordan Belfort: Get the ludes downstairs!

Donnie Azoff: What are you saying?

Jordan Belfort: Fuck. Get the ludes!

Donnie Azoff: I can't go down there, Jordan. It's flooded! It's three feet of water down there.

Jordan Belfort: I will not die sober! Get those fucking ludes!

Naomi Lapaglia: Where's he going?

Jordan Belfort: Hold on, baby!

Naomi Lapaglia: Donnie! Is he fucking crazy?

Jordan Belfort: He's just warning everybody.

Captain Ted Beecham: Jesus Christ. Hold on! Get away from the window! Rogue wave!

[on radio]

Captain Ted Beecham: Mayday! This is Captain Ted Beecham aboard the yacht Naomi! We are going down!

Donnie Azoff: I got 'em!

Jordan Belfort: Give me one for the nerves!

Naomi Lapaglia: You're doing fucking drugs right now?

Captain Ted Beecham: This is a fucking mayday! We require immediate assistance!

Jordan Belfort: [narration] The nice thing about getting rescued by Italians is that they feed you, make you drink red wine, then you get to dance.

Jordan Belfort: Babe, I spoke to the lawyers again today. I have some really, really great news. Turns out you're completely off the hook, honey.

Naomi Lapaglia: I know that already.

Jordan Belfort: Right! Exactly. In fact, you never did anything wrong in the first place. Turns out all the FBI really wants from me is to cooperate. You know? Turns out I have so much information about the stock market and Wall Street I can save the government years of heartache. Not to mention countless dollars.

Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.

Jordan Belfort: But it gets even better, baby. Because if I do decide to cooperate I might only looking at four short years. In which case, you know, we could start fresh. Maybe sell the house. And any fines that I have to pay wouldn't be due until after I've served my term, so we'd still have plenty of money leftover.

Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.

Jordan Belfort: The only thing that of course bummed me out a little bit about this whole idea is having to give information about my friends.

Naomi Lapaglia: Well, like you said there's no friends on Wall Street. Right?

Jordan Belfort: Right! Right, exactly. So there's a silver lining to that too, honey. Because they said eventually everyone's going to have to give information on this case so at the end of the day it might not even be a factor.

Naomi Lapaglia: Well that's good news. right?

Jordan Belfort: Yeah! Yeah.

Naomi Lapaglia: I'm really happy for you.

Jordan Belfort: What do you mean happy for me? Sweetheart, you should be happy for the both of us. Right?

Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. Right.

Captain Ted Beecham: Hold on!

Jordan Belfort: What the fuck is going on out here?

Captain Ted Beecham: The jet skis just went overboard!

Jordan Belfort: Oh, Jesus Christ. Honey, you okay?

Captain Ted Beecham: The waves are 20 feet high and building!

Jordan Belfort: Turn around! Let's go the other fucking way!

Captain Ted Beecham: We can't! We'll get broad-sided and tip over.

Jordan Belfort: I am a master diver, you hear that? A master diver! No one's gonna fucking die! I got you, baby. I got you. Trust me, okay? I love you.

[kisses Naomi]

Jordan Belfort: I love you, baby. Just hold on tight.

Naomi Lapaglia: Okay!

Jordan Belfort: [narration] Say what you will, but the Duchess did have style. She brought in a decorator, feng shui'd the whole place. She even hired a gay butler. This guy was smart, sophisticated, professional. Really, really great. Except for that one time.

Naomi Lapaglia: [Naomi walks in on a gay orgy] Oh my God!

Nicholas the Butler: Oh, hey. Is it Wednesday already? Uh, what the fuck! That is fucked up!

Naomi Lapaglia: [to Jordan after the incident] He must have thought we were still at the Hamptons this weekend, you know.

Jordan Belfort: Right, right. Where were they doing it, sweetheart? In the bedroom?

Naomi Lapaglia: They were everywhere! There were two guys over there on the table. There were more over here. There were four right here.

Jordan Belfort: Ugh! Are you fucking serious? Right there? Why didn't you tell me, sweetheart?

Naomi Lapaglia: Baby, it gets worse. After they left I checked the apartment.