Murray the Cop Quotes in The Odd Couple (1968)
Murray the Cop Quotes:
Oscar Madison: I'm $800 behind in alimony. Let's raise the stakes.
Roy: They can do it, you know.
Oscar Madison: Do what?
Roy: Throw you in jail.
Oscar Madison: Never. If she can't call me up once a week to aggravate me, she's not happy.
Murray the Cop: Aren't you worried about the kids?
Oscar Madison: Murray, the kids are living in their grandfather's house with a swimming pool in California. Can we just play cards?
Roy: I told you you'd get into trouble. It's because you don't know how manage anything. I should know - I'm your accountant.
Oscar Madison: If you're my accountant, how come I need money?
Roy: If you need money, how come you play poker?
Oscar Madison: 'Cause I need money.
Roy: But you always lose.
Oscar Madison: That's why I need the money.
Roy: Then don't play poker.
Oscar Madison: Then don't come to my house and eat my potato chips.
[grabs the bag of potato chips on the poker table and flings the entire contents all over the living room]
Oscar Madison: You see, wise guy? Potato chips!
Murray the Cop: Oh, beautiful, beautiful.
[an argument ensues with everyone bickering all at once]
Murray the Cop: What are you yelling about? We're playing a friendly game!
[the bickering continues]
Murray the Cop: All right, all right, ALL RIGHT! Calm down, calm down, take it easy. I'm a cop, you know - I can arrest the whole lousy game.
[they all quiet down]
Oscar Madison: My friend Murray the cop is right. Let's just play cards and please hold them up. I can't see where I marked them.
Roy: He owes money to his wife, his government and his friends and he still won't take it seriously.
Oscar Madison: Life goes on even for those of us who are divorced, broke and sloppy.
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