Muerte Quotes in Undercover Blues (1993)

Jeff Blue: [answering phone] Y-ello.

Muerte: This is Blue?

Jeff Blue: Speaking...

Muerte: Do you remember me?

Jeff Blue: Well, you have a really sexy voice. But hey, I'm a happily married man.

Muerte: Well, you'll be a dead man soon.

Jeff Blue: [laughing] Who is this again?

Muerte: This is Muerte.

Jeff Blue: Morty!

Muerte: No! No Morty! MUERTE! "DEATH"!

Jeff Blue: Yeah right, death...

Muerte: That's right. I'm gonna come for you man. I'm gonna come for you, and I'm gonna kill you, okay and...

Jeff Blue: Hey hey hey Morty, Morty, Morty, it's late. What's the bottom line here?

Muerte: The bottom line? The bottom line is you're gonna die man... Ugly, okay?

Jeff Blue: Look Morty, do me a favor, okay? Don't call here any more unless you want to have, like, a serious conversation, alright?

[hangs up on him]

Jeff Blue: Oh, hi, Morty.

Muerte: Muerte. MUERTE! For death! You die today!

Jeff Blue: Right.

[Muerte begins to make some very elaborate moves while holding a knife]

Jeff Blue: You know that looks really great on TV, but in real life you get better results if you just kind of hold it like this and...

Muerte: Shut up! SHUT UP!

Jeff Blue: Do you always have this much problem with a little constructive criticism?

Jane Blue: [while Meurte is floating on a life saver in the ocean] Can I get you anything? Coffee? Tea?

Muerte: [considers the offer] No, no, I'm fine, thank you.

Muerte: My name... is MUERTE!

Jeff: Nice to meet you Morty, my name is Jeff.

Muerte: My name is Muerte, my name is death!

Muerte: My name is MORTY!

Paulina Novacek: Take his gag off.

Muerte: My name is Morty!

Jeff Blue: Muerte.

Muerte: I kill you.

Paulina Novacek: Enough! Somebody find out who this man is and then kill him!

Jane Blue: [Muerte has been disarmed and Jeff has his arm in a hold when Jane approaches them, carrying shopping bags] Now what?

Jeff Blue: Oh, hi, hon. You remember, I told you about Morty. Morty, this is Jane.

[pushes Muerte towards Jane]

Jane Blue: Oh, hi, Morty, look it's nice to meet you, but we've just got so much shopping to do...

Muerte: [pulls another switchblade from his boot and points it at her] Shut up! Shut up! You die too!

Jane Blue: Oh for God's sakes...

Jeff Blue: [while Muerte is in a tree in an aligator pit wearing only his shirt and socks] Tell you what, you wait here. I'll go for help.

Muerte: No, no, Blue, don't leave me!

Jeff Blue: Can I get you anything, Morty? Coffee? Tea?

Muerte: Coffee? Tea? No, no, I'm fine. Just get me the hell out of here!

Jeff Blue: Ta-ta.

Muerte: Ta-ta! Good-bye! Thank you!

Jeff Blue: [last lines - on the boat] Which way is Cuba?

Muerte: [in the water] No, no, that's the wrong way! Please, come back! No, the land is back there behind you! Where are you going? Blue, no!

Paulina Novacek: So, Mr. Muerte...

Muerte: Excuse me please, no "Mister," is "Muerte."

Bar Patron: Hey Muerte, you lookin' pretty banged up.

Muerte: Yeah? Well you should see the other guys! 50 guys, with chains, and dogs, you should see what they look like!

Bar Patron: That ain't what I heard at all. I heard it was one guy, with a cute little tiny baby! Ha Ha Ha!

[bar patrons laugh with him]

Bar Patron: Which one was it who did this to you, Muerte? Was it the guy, or that cute little tiny baby! Ha Ha Ha!

Muerte: [grabs the patron by the back of the head and smashes it down on the bar, breaking his beer glass on his face]

Bar Patron: Aaaahhhhhh! Owwwwwwww!

[screaming in pain]

Muerte: My name is Muerte! My name is Death!

[gets up and starts to storm out of the bar, then turns around]

Muerte: Don't you forget that! Scumhooks!

Jane Blue: [Jane, disguised as the bag lady sits next to Muerte at the bar] I know you!

Muerte: Everybody know me! I am Muerte!

Jane Blue: You're the guy that got stomped, by that guy and the baby! Heh Heh!

Muerte: Hey! Don't provoke me! OK?

Jane Blue: You wanna get back at him? I know someone who will pay big!

Muerte: You don't know nada.

Jane Blue: OK! I don't know *nada*. But this guy, said *Muerte*, he's the guy for the job!

[starts to get up]

Muerte: Wait!

[grabs Jane by the arm forcing her to sit back down]

Muerte: Who told you this?

Jane Blue: You gotta buy me a drink first.

Muerte: What would you like?