Mrs. Martha Wilson Quotes in Dennis the Menace (1993)
Mrs. Martha Wilson Quotes:
George Wilson: [sees Dennis being helped by Gunther in a game of hide-and-seek] He's cheating.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: What are you doing?
George Wilson: Dennis is cheating. He's using the Beckman kid as a spy.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Oh, leave them alone, George.
George Wilson: I'm gonna even things up. Gunther?
[Gunther looks up]
George Wilson: Gunther, I'm just talking to your daddy on the telephone. He's going to the ice cream store. He wants to take you with him.
[Gunther gasps in excitement]
George Wilson: Hurry up and go home!
[Gunther goes cross-eyed and runs off]
George Wilson: [chuckles] Now it's fair.
[Mr. Wilson sighs as he sits back down]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: You lied to a toddler, George!
[Mr. Wilson continues chuckling]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Well, think how disappointed he's going to be when he gets home!
George Wilson: Well, he better get used to it. Disappointment's gonna be a big part of his life. He's a foot short for his age and he's cross-eyed.
[Mrs. Wilson glares at him]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Weren't you a fat boy?
George Wilson: I was husky.
[in bed at night]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: George, are you sleeping?
George Wilson: I was until you started yaking.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: I'm sorry.
George Wilson: Was Dennis in our bathroom?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Yes.
George Wilson: I think the little rat put mouthwash in my nasal spray and toilet cleanser in my mouthwash.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Why would he do something like that?
George Wilson: [smiles sarcastically] Must you ask?
George Wilson: [angry about Alice Mitchell's cancelled flight] Over my dead body! This is the crowning moment of my retired life, and I'm not throwing it away like the evening trash for some ninny who can't get her keister to the airport on time!
Mrs. Martha Wilson: George Wilson, you have no right to insult Alice! She can't help the weather any more than you or I.
George Wilson: Well, she...
Mrs. Martha Wilson: It's just plain bad luck! It's no one's fault.
George Wilson: A tragedy of this magnitude has to be somebody's fault, Martha!
Mrs. Martha Wilson: It isn't a tragedy! A little boy's going to join us for a party. Uh, if you want to forsake your neighbors when they need help, you do it alone.
George Wilson: Why is it when everyone else feasts on the pleasure of life, I get the indigestion?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Because you're an old grump!
Dennis: How old is this bed?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: It belonged to my mother.
Dennis: Where's she sleeping now?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: She's been gone many years, Dennis.
Dennis: On business?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: No, she's in Heaven.
Dennis: Oh, there's an awful lot of people in Heaven, especially old people.
George Wilson: [turns on bathroom light and walks in but slips on wet soapy floor, doing a full split at the legs]
George Wilson: [grabs hold of the sink, to pull himself up] New pajamas. God bless them.
George Wilson: [opens medicine cabinet and takes toilet-cleaner mouthwash out. He pours some and gargles on it and then spits it out groaning in disgust]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: [hearing him from upstairs] Poor thing, I wish he'd get the hernia fixed.
George Wilson: [has mouth on running faucet as he's trying to frantically rinse his mouth]
George Wilson: [sniffling now, he reaches for the nasal spray-mouth wash. He squeezes some up one nostril. Squeezes up the other nostril. His face goes wild as he drops the container]
George Wilson: [howling wildly he plunges his head in the sink full of water and desperately tries cleaning his nose]
Dennis: Hi, Mrs. Wilson. Is Mr. Wilson up yet?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Not yet, dear.
Dennis: How long do you think he's gonna sleep for?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Not too much longer. He's having his picture taken this morning.
Dennis: For what?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: He's being honored for his garden.
Dennis: [pauses and looks back at the yard, then looks at Mrs. Wilson again] Do you think he'll get mad if I went up the stairs.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: What do you want to go upstairs for?
Dennis: I made him a "I'm Sorry, I Shot Paint On Your Chicken" card!
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Well, that's very nice, Dennis.
Dennis: I brought my own pillow so I won't get my spit all over yours.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Thank you, Dennis.
[Mr. Wilson goes disgusted]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: George, take Dennis's suitcase up to the guest room, please.
George Wilson: He's got arms.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: Don't you start, dear.
George Wilson: [the others see the mess Dennis has made. Some people start taking pictures of it]
Mrs. Martha Wilson: [sensing George getting mad] Now, George, take it easy.
George Wilson: [glares at Dennis]
Dennis: [looks back guiltily] I made a mistake?
George Wilson: [just glares back]
George Wilson: Who else has a night-blooming mock orchid flowering this year?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: It's an awfully homely-looking plant, George.
George Wilson: Hang the looks at the thing! It opens before your eyes in the light of a full moon. It's a marvel, Martha. 40 years to mature and blossom. The flower opens and withers in a matter of moments.
[Mr. and Mrs. Wilson approach a rare mock orchid kept alive for 40 years]
George Wilson: There isn't a gardener in town who has a plant that requires a 40-year investment for ten seconds of splendor.
Dennis: [in an attempt to give Mr. Wilson his 'I'm Sorry' card] I'm kind of busy today, so I won't have a chance to give it to him. I have to go to Margaret's house, because we're getting poor and my mom's got a job now. So could I just leave it up by his whisker-cutter? That's where I leave all my dad's 'Sorry' cards, and it's a good time to say you're sorry. 'Cause grownup guys are happy in the morning when they wake up. My dad's so happy, he whistles when he goes to the bathroom. The only time he isn't happy is on Sunday morning when he and my mom wrestle. They kind of like to be alone when they do that. I think it's 'cause they take off their shirts and then they start to make funny noises.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: [uncomfortable about what Dennis is saying] Uh, you can go up, as long as you promise not to disturb Mr. Wilson.
Dennis: I promise.
George Wilson: Where are you going?
Mrs. Martha Wilson: [mad at him for his apathy] To make myself a cup of tea.
George Wilson: I didn't decree that we wouldn't have children, Martha. It was out of both our hands.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: This isn't about having children or not having children, George. You missed the point. It's about my feeling, something very good and not being able to tell you about it.
[Dennis has just put paint Mr. Wilson's barbequed chicken]
George Wilson: Tastes like paint and wood.
Mrs. Martha Wilson: I'll make us some sandwiches.
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