Mrs. Green Quotes in Summer School (1987)


Mrs. Green Quotes:

  • Principal Kelban: Field trips to the beach, drinking on the beach, a bed in your classroom, a screening of Texas Chainsaw Massacre 1... quite a summer, Mr. Shoop.

    Shoop: I tried to keep it interesting.

    Phil Gills: I have his dismissal ready for your signature, sir.

    Principal Kelban: Before I sign anything, I understand there are some people waiting to speak on Mr. Shoop's behalf.

    Shoop: Really?

    Principal Kelban: Come in.

    [opens the door to Shoop's students and their parents and guardians]

    Phil Gills: Mr. Kelban, you're not actually going to listen to these delinquents?

    Principal Kelban: No, I'm going to listen to their parents. I'm Principal Kelban. Is there a spokesperson here?

    Mr. Gremp: I guess I am. I'm Howard Gremp.

    Principal Kelban: You're Chainsaw's father. Interesting boy.

    Mr. Gremp: No, you can say it. He's a lunatic.

    Chainsaw: Dad...

    Mr. Gremp: Six weeks ago, I thought he had the IQ of a salad bar. His only interest in life was to make people sick. If my mother came to dinner, he would give the dog a third eye or an extra leg. Because of him, we stopped having kids. You can imagine the feeling when I saw him studying. The wife and I almost burst into tears.

    Mrs. Frazier: David was doing his homework, too.

    Mr. Gremp: It makes sense, they share the same brain.

    Mrs. Green: Not only did Mr. Shoop get my daughter to read, he taught her to drive.

    Mr. Winchester: He showed Kevin there's more to life than football. I'm not sure I agree, but it's possible.

  • Shoop: Denise: no previous test score because you ditched every test, but a 38.

    Mrs. Green: Honey, that's terrific!

    Denise: We'll get 'em next time.

    Shoop: Kevin, from a 48 to a 75!

    Kevin Winchester: Yeah, I'm back on the team!

    [Kevin and his did share football shouts and hug]

    Shoop: Chainsaw: last score was a 6, this time: 59. Monster comeback! And Dave: from a 26 to a 70.

    Dave: I passed!

    Anna-Maria Mazarelli: You made it!

    Chainsaw: You passed? You passed and I failed, asshole! How could you do that to me?

    Dave: It was an accident. I'll take it again, I can fail, I know it.

    Shoop: Pam went from a 53 to an 82.

    Pam: Was that the highest?

    Shoop: Well, almost. That guy who spent six weeks in the bathroom got a 91. But look, there's more going on here than test scores and grades. You all worked hard and improved.

    Phil Gills: And that's very nice, Mr. Shoop. The point here is that we are here to discuss Mr. Shoop's flagrant violation of school policies.

    Principal Kelban: Hold it, Gills. According to my numbers, the average scores have increased from 28 to 63. That's 125% improvement. Now that's teaching. Mr. Shoop, I'm granting you tenure.

  • Mrs. Green: You know something, Phil? I suddenly want to live to be very old. Very. I want to be around to see what happens. The world is stirring in very strange ways. Maybe this is the century for it. Maybe that's why it's so troubled. Other centuries had their driving forces. What will ours have been when men look back? Maybe it won't be the American century after all... or the Russian century or the atomic century. Wouldn't it be wonderful... if it turned out to be everybody's century... when people all over the world - free people - found a way to live together? I'd like to be around to see some of that... even the beginning. I may stick around for quite a while.

  • Mrs. Green: Are you very disappointed, Phil?

    Phil Green: Yes, I am. I was almost sure he'd hand me the Stassen story or Washington. Oh, I wasn't looking for an easy one, Ma, but I did want something I could make good on. I'd so like the first one here to be a natural. Something I know they would read.

    Mrs. Green: Oh, you mean, there's enough anti-Semitism in real life without people reading about it?

    Phil Green: No, but this one's doomed before I start. What can I say that hasn't been said before?

    Mrs. Green: I don't know. Maybe it hasn't been said well enough. If it had, you wouldn't have had to explain it to Tommy just now, or you father and I to you. It would be nice sometime, not to have to explain it to someone like Tommy. Kids are so decent to start with.

  • Mrs. Green: I never realized pain could be so... sharp.

  • Phil Green: Funny thing, that girl, Mr. Minify's niece suggested the series on antisemitism. Funny.

    Mrs. Green: You don't say? Why, women will be thinking next, Phil.

  • Phil Green: Ma, I've got it! I've got the idea, the angle, the lead. I'll be Jewish! Why, all I've got to do is just say it! No one around here knows me. I can live with myself for six weeks, eight weeks, nine months. Ma, this is it!

    Mrs. Green: It must be. It always is when you're this sure.

    Phil Green: Ma, listen, I've even got the title. "I Was Jewish for Six Months."

    Mrs. Green: It's right, Phil.

    Phil Green: Ma, it's like this click just happened inside me. It won't be the same, sure, but it'll be close. I can just tell them I'm Jewish and see what happens.

    Mrs. Green: It'll work fine, Phil.

    Phil Green: Dark hair, dark eyes. Just like Dave. Just like a lot of guys who aren't Jewish. No accent, no mannerisms. Neither has Dave.

  • Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: Maybe we're not as half as bad off as we think we are.

    Mrs. Green: We couldn't be any worse off. Why the menfolks haven't even got a vote.

    Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: If we can prove our cases against those claim jumpers, then they will be the illegal residents.

    Chad Stevens: In the meantime, Flint will be running the new county as Sheriff.

    William Hardy: If there were only some way these folks could establish legal residence.

    Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: Oh, yes, but there isn't. I just wrecked, or at least I wracked my brains to think of something. I even read one of my own lawbooks.

Browse more character quotes from Summer School (1987)