Mr. Jordan Quotes in Heaven Can Wait (1978)

Mr. Jordan: The likelihood of one individual being right increases in direct proportion to the intensity with which others are trying to prove him wrong.

Mr. Jordan: He's been drugged by those two downstairs. This is a murder. See how he's slowly sliding into the water?

Joe Pendleton: She loves me, Mr. Jordan!

Mr. Jordan: Joe, you must abide by what is written.

Mr. Jordan: Haven't you learned the rules of probability and outcome? Aren't you aware that every question of life and death remains a probability until the outcome?

[last lines]

Mr. Jordan: So long, champ.

Joe Pendleton: [Joe and Mr. Jordan are looking for a body for Joe to inhabit] You can't palm off a second-rater on me. You gotta remember I was in the pink!

Mr. Jordan: That is becoming a most obnoxious color, Joe.

Mr. Jordan: I can't figure out my feelings towards you, I despise you, and I pity you. I don't even want to shake your hand, and yet I almost wish you luck.

Terpsichore: Mr. Jordan, I want to cry, but I can't. There are no tears. Mr. Jordan, at least let me cry.

Mr. Jordan: You can't anymore. Tears are only for mortals. It's an advantage they have over us.

Mr. Jordan: Same old Max, one of my favorite people.

Messenger 7013: Mine too. When does he join us?

Mr. Jordan: Mr. Corkle is an agent.

Messenger 7013: Thats right - we never get them.