Morris Quotes in Big Game (2014)

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Morris Quotes:

  • Morris: Someone helped him. Someone with a small shoe size.

    Hazar: Small shoe size? What is that supposed to mean?

    Morris: Well usually it means small feet.

  • Hazar: I spoke to my taxidermist about some logistics of dealing with a human cadaver, and apparently if I'm going to stuff him and mount him it's best that the body's as fresh as possible.

    Morris: You're gonna stuff him?

    Hazar: What else should one do with a hunting trophy?

  • Morris: I just need a favor.

    Watkins: It's not a favor, it's a felony!

  • Morris: Look, the less you know, the better off you are.

    Watkins: Okay. Then the less information I give you, the better I feel.

  • Kim Gardener: It's not fair. Jack Flack always escapes. How does he do it, Morris? I had ten times as many bullets.

    Morris: Yeah, but Flack had ingenuity and the contacts, Kim. That's better than bullets sometimes.

  • Morris: You're such a tease.

    Chelsea: You're such a pervert!

    Morris: And proud of it.

  • Fritz: Look I don't know how you can run a business and not be able to cash this miserable pittance of a welfare check, is all.

    Morris: [taking a pickle from his pickle jar] If I give you all my money, I will have nothing left to buy with.

  • Saul: A man has the right to change his name to vatever he vants to change it to. And if a man vants to be called Muhammad Ali, godammit this is a free country, you should respect his vishes, and call the man Muhammad Ali!

    Morris: His mamma call him Clay, imma call him Clay.

    Saul: Then you're a putz. All of you are putzes. They should change the sign outside from My-T-Sharp to 'ze Three Putzes.

  • Clarence: You must be outta your God-damned mind! Joe Louis the greatest boxer who ever lived. I'll be with you boys in a minute. He was badder than Cassius Clay, he was better than Sugar Ray, he was badder than - who's that new boy? Mike Tyson! Look like a bull dog! He was badder than him too! He'd whip Mike Tyson's ass, he'd whip all their asses!

    Saul: What about Rocky Marciano?

    Clarence: Oh, there they go! There they go! Every time I start talking about boxing, a white man gotta pull Rocky Marciano outta their ass! That's they one! That's they one! Rocky Marciano! Rocky Marciano! Lemme tell you something once and for all! Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't shit!

    Saul: He beat Joe Louis's ass!

    Morris: That's right, he did whip Joe Louis's ass!

    Clarence: Joe Louis was seventy-five years old when he fought!

    Morris: I don't know how old he was, but he got his ass whooped.

    Clarence: Joe Louis had come out of retirement to fight Rocky Marciano! The man was seventy-six years old! Joe Louis always lied about his age! He lied about his age all the time! One time, Frank Sinatra came in here, and sat in this chair. I say, "Frank, you hang out with Joe Louis. Just between me and you, how old is Joe Louis?" Know what Frank told me? He said "Hey, Joe Louis is a hundred thirty-seven years old." A hundred and thirty-seven years old!

    Sweets: Oh, man, you ain't never meet no Frank Sinatra.

    Clarence: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! AND FUCK YOU! Who's next?

  • Sweets: [Morris drops a chicken bone into the collection basket] Donations! Donations!

    Morris: Oh! I thought it was the trash!

  • Morris: Pound for pound, Sugar Ray Robinson's the greatest fighter that ever lived!

    Clarence: Aw, come on, man! What about Joe Louis?

    Saul: The Brown Bomber! Now that was a great boxer!

    Morris: You damn right!

    Sweets: I suppose nobody in here ever heard of Cassius Clay?

    Morris: He got a point. Cassius Clay was a bad motherfucker!

    Clarence: I ain't saying Clay ain't bad. I'm just saying I stopped liking Cassius Clay once he changed his name to Moh-hammad Ali! What kinda shit is that?

    Saul: Wait a second, wait a second! A man has got the right to change his name to whatever he wants to change it to. And if a man wants to be called Muhammad Ali, Goddamit, this is a free country, you should respect his wishes, and call the man Muhammad Ali!

    Morris: His Momma named him Clay, I'm gonna call him Clay.

    Clarence: Mmm-hmm! That's right!

    Sweets: I say Clay.

    Saul: Get outta here.

    Clarence: Ha-ha-ha! That's right! That's right! He gonna always be Clay to me. I don't give a fuck what he change his name to. He is Clay! He Clay to me. I say Clay.

    Saul: Well, then, you're a putz. The three of you. Three putzes. You should change the name outside from My-T-Sharp to The Three Putzes.

  • [Morris looks back at a chair he broke]

    Morris: Sorry about that chair.

    Richard: Oh, that's OK, it was... really old.

  • Morris: These are very good cigars. I want you to smoke one after you get a little. You do get a little?

    Richard: Yeah... a little.

  • Morris: I'm not well, you know.

  • Morris: Even I can see that it's not that you went out, it's who you went out with. It's like learn-your-fucking-lesson day around here.

  • Morris: Meeting Michelle! What are you going to see, "Beaches"?

    David Bloomberg: You are the wind beneath my wings, man!

    Morris: Hey, did you ever know that you're my hero?

  • [Morris is still doing abuse therapy despite Happer's wishers]

    Morris: [on phone] You're an asshole, Happer! You love it! Craphound!

    [Happer hangs up. He goes back to his omelette, pauses and slowly picks up phone]

    Morris: [gleefully] I'm still here, Happer! And you're still a useless mother -...

    [Happer slams the receiver back on the phone]

  • [last lines]

    Detective: All right, come on, come on, what's going on? Come on, what is it? Come on!

    Clergyman: Please, sir, I beg of you, there's a dead man here.

    Detective: All right, no one move!

    [long pause while he realizes it's a church burial]

    Detective: Finsbury?

    Michael FinsburyJulia FinsburyMasterman FinsburyJoseph FinsburyMorrisJohn Finsbury: Yes?

    Detective: MORRIS Finsbury!

    John Finsbury: [turning Morris around and pointing at him] Yes.

    Detective: Morris Finsbury, I arrest you for stealing £100,000.

    Lawyer Patience: But the money has been returned, sir.

    Detective: Who are you, sir? Some sort of accomplice?

    Lawyer Patience: Certainly not: I am his solicitor.

    Detective: Oh, you've brought your solicitor with you, have you? Yes, I've met your type before.

    Lawyer Patience: No, no, no. I mean, I, I, I'm the administrator of the tontine.

    Detective: Tontine?

    Joseph Finsbury: Named after Lorenzo Tonti, a Neapolitan banker.

    Detective: And who are you, sir?

    Joseph Finsbury: I...

    Masterman Finsbury: [interrupting] He's nobody. He's my young brother.

    Detective: And who are you, sir?

    Masterman Finsbury: None of your business, sir!

    Detective: I shall have you arrested for indecent exposure!

    Julia Finsbury: Oh!

    Michael Finsbury: My grandfather was recently buried, sir.

    Detective: And who are you, sir?

    Julia Finsbury: He is Michael Finsbury.

    Detective: And who are YOU, madam?

    Michael Finsbury: She is Julia Finsbury, shortly to become... Julia Finsbury!

    Detective: Young man, did you know there was a body in the piano?

    Peacock: I did it.

    Detective: Who is he?

    Michael Finsbury: He is the butler, sir.

    Detective: The butler did it?

    Michael Finsbury: No, sir. I put the body there.

    Detective: Is this true?

    Michael Finsbury: Yes sir.

    Detective: In that case, you are entitled to a reward of £1,000. You are responsible for bringing the Bournemouth Strangler to his just end.

    Michael Finsbury: A, a thousand pounds? Oh, but I-I-I don't, I don't deserve it. The body just arrived in a barrel.

    John Finsbury: I sent it.

    Detective: And who are you, sir?

    Morris Finsbury: He is of diminished responsibility, officer. It was all my doing. If there's any justice in this naughty world, the reward is mine.

    Detective: And WHO are YOU?

    [falls into open grave]

    Morris Finsbury: You remember me - Morris Finsbury. I was falsely accused of stealing a hundred thousand pounds, whereas in fact it was me, and me alone, who was responsible for bringing the Bournemouth Strangler to his just desserts.

  • John Finsbury: Morris! Do you realize it's a criminal offense to wear that coat?

    Morris: I'm not wearing any *trousers*!

    John Finsbury: ...but that too is a criminal offense!

  • Morris: [In the prison: recognizing another inmate, one who apparently caused him to end up in prison] Jessell!

    Jessell, man who caused Morris' incarceration: Well, if it ain't little Morris! So YOU'RE here?

    Morris: Yes, I'm here. And YOU'RE here, too, where you belong.

    Jessell, man who caused Morris' incarceration: Ah, ya' got me all wrong, kid. I lost more money on that horse than YOU did.

    Morris: Did you, Jessell? Did you lose your position and money and friends? And mother?... She died at my trial. You killed her. If it hadn't been for you...

    Jessell, man who caused Morris' incarceration: Shut up, ya' little swine! You were a thief long before I knew ya'!

    Morris: [Lunges and grabs Jessel] That's a lie! Take it back! Take it back!

    Steve Jordan: [Jumping in to break it up] Cut it out! Cut it out!

    Steve Jordan: Go on, scram!

    [Shoves Jessel away; Jessel runs off, Morris remains with downcast look on face]

    Steve Jordan: .

    Steve Jordan: Don't do that... Come on, don't take it so hard.

    Morris: I can't help it. How did your family feel?

    Steve Jordan: [Pensively pausing] Well, they don't know. I changed my name... They think I'm in China.

    Morris: How'd you do that?

    Steve Jordan: Well, I got friends out there. They forward my letters home and cable my folks once a month.

    [Loud prison bell rings]

    Steve Jordan: I'll see ya' around. I work in the office over there. I gotta' lot of new fish comin' in. You know - associates, inmates. Come on, son. Buck up, boy.

    [Gives Morris a reassuring pat and heads off]

  • Morris: [after hearing a defining moment in Tsotsi/David's childhood] What kind of bastard would break a dog's back?

  • Morris: Now look what you've done... you've made an old man piss his pants

  • Terence: We wrote one last night outside the mini mart. Morris called it "Stuart Drives A Comfortable Car" and then like in country songs, you know, in parentheses it says "There's Usually Someone in the Trunk." And, and um, I came up with a tune just a hummin'.

    Doyle: See, you don't want to question the genius, Vaughan. Morris here is a modern-day poet, kinda like in olden times.

    Morris: Yeah, I got a new tune in composition entitled "The Thrill." And it goes somethin' like this: "I stand on the hill, not for a thrill, but for the breath of a fresh kill. Never mind the man who contemplates doin' away with license plates. He stands alone, anyhow, bakin' the cookies of discontent by the heat of the laundromat vent. Leavin' his soul!" Then like in poetry I go dot-dot-dot, you know, kinda off center, then I drop down and then I go: "Leavin' his soul! And partin' the waters of the medulla oblongata of - -brrrrrr! - -mankind!" That was a damn good song, wasn't it Doyle?

  • Morris: Dots look good on paper. You don't sing them anyway, you're just showing your true Aries color now.

    Doyle: Stay out of my goddam face, you fucking buzzard!

  • Terence: I don't think that's right. I believe the "Dot Dot Dot" come between "Medula" and "Oblongota".

    [Morris shakes his head]

    Terence: Well, it did!

    Morris: The dots are where I say they are. Melody and tune, that's your trade, Terence. You're a tunesmith.

  • Vaughan Cunningham: I don't understand.

    Morris: Exactly the point, my young level-headed friend.

    Vaughan Cunningham: I don't get it.

    Morris: Well, I rest my case.

  • Morris: Okay. What's the password?

    Jerome: You got it.

    Morris: Got what?

    Jerome: The password.

    Morris: The password is what?

    Jerome: Exactly.

    Morris: The password is exactly?

    Jerome: No, it's okay.

    Morris: The password is okay?

    Jerome: Far as I'm concerned.

    Morris: Damn it, say the password!

    Jerome: What.

    Morris: Say the password, onion head!

    Jerome: The password is what?

    Morris: [frustrated] That's what I'm asking you!

    Jerome: [more frustrated] It's the password!

    Morris: The password is it?

    Jerome: [exasperated] Ahhhhh! The password is what!

    Morris: It! You just said so!

    Jerome: The password isn't it! The password is?

    Morris: What?

    Jerome: Got it!

    Morris: I got it?

    Jerome: Right.

    Morris: It or right?

  • Morris: [slurring] Oh, Lord... Either somebody put something in my drink, or you're the finest motherfucker I've seen in ages!

    Apollonia: I'm sorry, what did you say?

    Morris: [clearer] You look nice tonight.

  • Morris: Your lips would make a lollipop too happy.

  • Morris: [to the Kid as the Revolution leave and the Time takes the stage] Why don't you stay awhile, see how it's done?

  • [Watching his girl group rehearse a dance routine]

    Morris: Oh, Lord. Cut! Cut!

    [pause]

    Morris: You ladies don't seem to realize how valuable my time is. You're going to make my boys look bad!

    Jill: Why don't you let us come up with our own steps?

    [Jerome shakes his head violently]

    Morris: We tried that, remember? Now, you're in the best possible position you could be in. So what's the matter? Your shoes on too tight or something?

    [Claps]

    Morris: Let's have some action! Let's have some asses wigglin'... I want some perfection!

    [Cackles, cues music]

    Morris: [Girls start dancing again, more seductively]

    Morris: [watching; sotto to Jerome] I think I'm gonna need a drink.

  • Morris: [after Prince's dad shoots himself] Bang, bang!

  • Morris: [first lines - into video camera] I remember looking out at the two of you, Tom playing on the dock, you watching. I was thinking how lucky you were to have a mom like her. And how lucky she was to have a boy like you. That's what you stole from me Simon. That's what I can never forgive.

  • Morris: When someone carries that kind of anger around all of the time, they can seem stupid. That's the thing about anger, it sucks up a lot of intelligence.

  • Morris: I guess even in the spirit world sex and violence sells.

  • Morris: What do you want to drink?

    Denise: Oh, a milk on the rocks.

  • Morris: Wait till my attorney hears about this mess.

    Denise: Yeah, just wait till my agent sees what they did to my boob!

  • Lauren: Daddy, what if he doesn't like me?

    Morris: Well, then the pigs can have him.

  • Shane: What was your initiation like?

    Morris: Unspeakable.

    Shane: What, like torture? Bondage? Sodomy?

Browse more character quotes from Big Game (2014)

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